Another Life Another Time
by DanH2010
Summary: Maybe the last in my Growing Pain saga sad times! Better summary on the third chapter u'll understand why if u read it R&R please
1. Pinned

**Summary - Little summary for you. Will give you a better summary in my next chapter or the one after even. Don't wanna give my plot away. Ooooo sounds ominous huh?**

**This is based 6 months after the birth Zoey. Yes another one in what is becoming a very long saga. Although I think this may be my last and I will be going back to normal leopards den stories. Which I am a little sad about coz I do love my little saga I made up .o well I got I little off the subject. Read and I hope u enjoy. And I do not own anything to do with WAH or anything : (**

The rain beat down on the African soil continuously. Unrelentingly. Lightning split the sky and illuminated a woman. Slumped over a truck. The rain pounded her back and head. A monotonous drip on the hood of the truck. Plink plink plink. In almost a hypnotising fashion. The rain was beginning to mingle with the blood that slowly tricked from the centre of her forehead. Leaving a muddy red puddle of the hood of the truck. She groaned, grateful to still be alive, although she was worried about the numb feeling which was gradually spreading throughout her body. The tree she was pinned against should have at least felt uncomfortable but she felt nothing. Her entire lower body should be in excruciating burning pain but there she felt no discomfort. Clamped between a truck and a tree. The only sensation she felt was a tingling which was rapidly receding. If only she had listened . If only she hadn't went out alone. If only the hand break on the truck hadn't failed. If only she hadn't skidded on the slick as glass mud and found herself pinned against a big tree and this uncompromising truck. If only…..

**An Hour Earlier**

"Alice look at the sky, the clouds. Please don't go out in this!" Danny pleaded.

"I'll be fine!" Alice assured him.

"Let me go then!"

"Danny you've been ill. I would worry myself sick. Please don't worry I'll be fine honest!"

"At least phone Evan or Ethan yeah?"

"No coz Ethan has 6 months old Zoey to look after with Lexi being at work and by the time Evan gets here I could have been there and back. Look I'll be an hour tops. I'll check the giraffe copy and I'll be straight back!"

"But Dupe…" he started.

"Danny!" Alice declared.

He exhaled. "Ok." He relented. Keep your radio handy!"

"Here!" she pushed it in her breast pocket. "Happy?"

"The giraffes will be fine." he told her hopefully.

"Danny!" she said exasperated.

He put his hands up. "Ok."

Rain was pouring and lightning flashed intermittedly. Thunder crashed. Danny disliked lightning storms after… "Please be careful Alice!"

"Always am." she said smiling. Pressed a quick kiss to his mouth at the front door. "We'll finish that kiss later yeah?" she winked trying to reassure him.

He still looked anxious.

"I promise I'll be ok." she said seriously. Then ran out into the rain and hopped in the truck. Was soaked through in seconds.

It was a fair drive to the copy and visibility was low. So low she was practically driving blind. She had drove this route so often she could do it with her eyes closed which was good coz she was practically doing that! She arrived at the copy and couldn't see the giraffes. Carried on driving and saw a giraffe lay at the bottom of an embankment. She put the hand break on the truck and climbed out. Skidded down the hill with her box in her hand. She would have took the truck down but it would be damaged to hell and she'd never get it back up again.

"Ok lets get you seen to boy."

Alice worked quickly. Kept trying to rub the water off her forehead but the rain was unrelenting. She stabilised the giraffe. Smiling. "Result!" she cackled and laughed. "Just wait til I tell Danny I saved a giraffe in a rain storm he's gonna be so jealous!" she told herself.

There was aloud crash and a sinister flash. And a rumbling noise which was slowly growing louder. It was behind her she turned her head and saw the truck barrelling down the embankment. Almost right on top of her. She was upright in seconds but her foot slipped on the slick grass. Those extra seconds slipping were seconds too long. The truck ploughed into her. Pushed her back up against a tree and pinned her there. She was unconscious immediately.

So now she was conscious. Barely. Alice supposed she should be grateful that she wasn't lain under the truck. That it had pushed her back rather than going over her. She shuddered. Right Alice get this sorted! She lifted herself up using a arm. Her hips protested the movement. Finally she felt some pain. The only time she had ever been relieved to hurt! Went into her breast pocket for the radio she had placed there. Usually this was attached to her jeans but she hadn't moved it after putting it there for Danny. Thank God she forgot other wise it would be crushed! Probably in the same state her entire lower body was!

"Leopards Den!" she said weakly.

Nothing.

"Oh c'mon Leopards Den!" she repeated more forcefully.

Again nothing.

She was groggy and wanted to sleep. The chill she was beginning to feel was beginning to have nothing to do with the rain or cold and everything to do with shock! She knew enough about blood loss to know about shock and she was losing blood she knew it! She started singing show tunes to herself to try and keep herself awake and keep the darkness at bay. Her voice getting weaker and weaker as time passed by.

A man's voice came over the radio. "Alice?" Danny's voice was panicked he obviously recognised how weak her voice sounded.

"Danny I'm in trouble. Look the rain has stopped. Send an ambulance and a fire engine to the far east quarter by the small lake. At the bottom of the embankment." she went silent, breathing shallow.

"Alice! Alice honey what's wrong?" he yelled.

Dammit! She wasn't replying. His heart started pounding as he went through the house.

**A/N oh no alice :( :( :(**


	2. Inevitable

Danny arrived where Alice said. He usually wouldn't have especially since he had the kids in the back of the truck but he had to know what was wrong. He was almost ill with worry. He was expecting to see Alice at the bottom of the embankment having fell and her lain on the floor in pain. Hurt but ok. The sight that greeted him stole the breath from his lungs. Alice slumped over the hood of the truck., arms splayed above her. Unmoving a giraffe lay under the wheels. He looked up the embankment and saw a trail of destruction that led from the top of the hill.

"Stay there!" he yelled to his 2 kids.

Danny was beside her stroking her head. "Alice honey wake up. Please wake up!" he pleaded. Trying desperately to keep the sheer panic from it's depths.

Her eyes fluttered. "Danny." she breathed and smiled. "I dreamt of you."

"look the ambulance is on it's way. Your gonna be just fine."

"not Lex." she said eyes cloudy.

Dammit, he hadn't specified his daughter. The ambulance rounded the corner. Bob and Lexi climbed out, his daughters face already anxious at just being on their land. He saw her face change as she noticed her mother.

"Mum!" she yelled and ran towards Alice. All her training had went out of the window.

"Mum." she said beside her. Was checking her pupils for head trauma.

"Lexi go to Daniel and Amie!" Alice told her stubbornly.

"No I gotta help you!"

"Do as your told Lexi!" Alice warned.

"Go see your brother and sister Lexi. I've got your mum. Calm down clear your head. Then you can help." Bob told Lexi softly.

Bob knew how hard it was for her to calm down. Especially the condition her mother was in. It was good. Not at all! She shared a worried look with Bob. He knew she knew.

She nodded and walked over to the car where her brother and sister sat.

The fire engine arrived. Bob was stood discussing courses of action with them. He nodded. Shook his then made a dropping motion with his hands. Danny was terrified. The grave look on their faces told him more than a thousand words ever could.

"I'll be over there a minute ok Alice?" Danny said softly.

Alice nodded absently.

Danny walked over to the firefighters. "Your gonna cut her out right?" Danny asked.

The firemen nodded.

"What aren't you telling me?" Danny asked.

"She's bleeding heavily sir." The fireman exhaled "The only thing keeping her stable is the truck. Once we move it…."

The fireman didn't have to finish. This was gonna kill her. "What about…is there not…" Danny fumbled. Tears gathered. His chest caving in. he looked at his kids as they sat in the car. Lexi looked at him with scared eyes. She knew exactly what was going on and exactly what was going to happen to her mother.

"How much chance has she got of surviving?"

The fireman looked pensive. "15 maybe 20 percent. That's being generous too sir."

"O God!" Danny breathed. He wanted to crumble to the earth. He had the kids to think of. He walked over to Alice. Was boosted when he saw she was alert.

"Hey honey." he said softly.

"Daniel and Amie need their tea." She told him.

That was typical Alice. Always thinking of her kids first.

"You're an amazing father Danny. You'll be fine."

"No Alice. I know what your doing. NO!"

"Bring Lexi Daniel and Amie over." she said stubbornly.

"No Alice."

"Please Danny." she paused. "I need to say goodbye to my kids." she pleaded with him voice soft. "Please!"

Alice you can't talk like that. Your not leaving us!" he said in complete denial.

"I'm not stupid Danny. I know what's going to happen and so do you, denying it doesn't make it any less true. Please bring my kids over."

A truck pulled up and Danny looked behind him. Evan and Ethan climbed out.

Ethan's eyes widened as he looked at Alice. "Oh God!" he shook his head. He also knew the severity of Alice's condition. Had seen it before when he worked in New Zealand. He walked over and hugged Lexi in the car.

Danny walked over to his kids. "She wants to see you." Danny's voice was thick. "I'm glad you're here Ethan. Where's Zoey?"

"Liv and Thabo have her. I got your message and came straight here. Evan was at ours and told me he'd drive me. I was in no condition…."

The 5 people walked across the African dirt.

"How is she dad?" Lexi whispered worried.

He looked at his oldest child. Although she was 24 she was still his baby in so many ways. "She's talking honey." was all he'd volunteer. Her face paled.

"Daniel Amie go with dad yeah." Lexi coaxed.

They followed him.

Amie looked at her mum and cocked her head to the side. A Danny trait she inherited. "Mum you ok?" Amie asked. Not quite understanding what was going on. She was only 7.

"A little sore baby."

Alice looked at her son. "Right Daniel I need you to do some stuff for me ok. I need you to look after Amie for me. I know she annoys you but that is your job ok. You're a brilliant big brother and I'm so proud of the way you've been in the last year. How much you've grown up and learned to control yourself. You're the best son any mother could ask for and I love you."

"I love you mum." he bit his lip. He didn't fully understand but he had a feeling.

Alice looked at her youngest daughter. "A my baby. My Amie. My mini me. You got an even more important job than Daniel. You gotta look after your dad. He's abit scatter brain and forgetful. So I need you to make sure he isn't silly and forgets anything. Your so amazing Amie. So clever and beautiful. Mum loves you too always."

Amie frowned confused. "I love you too mum but why….?"

Alice looked at Danny and shook her head. Don't tell her not till it's over. She told him silently.

"Mum loves you both babies."

She blew a kiss to them both and Danny took them over to the car.

Ethan and Lexi went over next.

Alice looked at them. Both their faces were drawn and strained trying not to scare the kids with crying.

"Ok my oldest babies. I am so happy that you found each other and I'm so proud of the way you've fought to keep each other this time. All the obstacles you've overcome together. And Zoey. She is so beautiful. Double of her daddy. I love you both so much and every minute I have had with you was magic. But look," she motioned them closer. "The 3 of us know this isn't gonna end well." she lowered her voice as Danny approached. "Ethan keep an eye on Danny. I have no idea how this I gonna affect him. Keep his head up any way you can! Lexi keep an eye on Amie and Daniel. They have no idea I just told them goodbye. And finally tell your little girl that nana loves her and she has her own guardian angel who watches over her and keeps her safe. I promise you both that I will."

Lexi eyes filled and she nodded.

"We love you mum." Ethan said.

"Thank you Ethan. It means a lot to hear you call me that."

They both leaned down and kissed her cheek. Gave her tight half hugs.

"Take care of each other. Never let each other go!"

"Never!" they vowed.

"Goodbye mum." Lexi said brokenly.

Alice nodded.

Amie and Daniel were sat in the car. Danny spoke to Evan.

"Thanks Ev." Danny said.

"Is it looking good?" Evan asked softly.

Danny shook his head.

Evan laid his hand on Danny's shoulder in sympathy. Then drove off with the kids.

Danny was about to return to Alice when a fireman stopped him. "I should warn you sir that as soon as we move her she'll lose consciousness immediately. You might wanna say your goodbyes."

His heart broke. Walked over to Alice for one last time. Stood beside her and clutched her hand.

"I need longer Alice. Our life hasn't been long enough!" his voice broken heart aching.

"I know honey. We expected a lifetime." she agreed.

"Don't give up. I'm here waiting for you to open your eyes ok!" he said and kissed her. "I love you forever!" he vowed.

A helicopter landed a little way away but he never took his eyes off his reason for living. The woman who stole his heart all those years ago. Their life together flashed before his eyes. A second was all it took.

"I love you for eternity Danny. I'm here always!" she also vowed. Kissed his hand. He held her tight. Then he backed away slowly. Their hands still grasped tightly. Arm outstretched wanting to hold her hand as long as he could. Wishing he could make this moment last forever coz he knew what was gonna happen now and it was the stuff that nightmares were made from. The thought of living without the one you love. Her hand slid from his. Their eyes locked and held as he walked backward away from her. They made promises and vows with their eyes.

Ethan had Lexi wrapped in his arms. She was sobbing. She knew what was gonna happen and she couldn't watch her mother die. He stood with his kids at a distance. Everything was ready to go. Bob and a medic from the helicopter held her up beneath her shoulders. Alice winked at Danny then nodded. There was a groaning of metal as the truck was pulled away from her. Alice frowned for a second. Gasped then went completely limp in their arms. Paramedics surrounded her. Ethan held Lexi back.

Alice was soon lain on a stretcher in the helicopter. Danny was inside too. He listened as they fought to save her. Administering to her wounds. Giving injection after injection. They couldn't stop her bleeding. Internal or external. She had lost too much blood. Alice was gone before they even made it to hospital.

**A/N awww this is so sad. Alice dead :( no jokes no ploys honest to god gone. no reappearing half way through the story :( **


	3. Shock and Mourning

**Full Summary. Ok people. This story is basically about how Danny is going to cope without Alice among other things too. This is based a lot around Ethan too. As the story unfolds you'll see why.**

**I think I might do the song at the beginning of the chapters coz I am always finding songs which fit them. Although it probs wont be for every chapter coz I'll only do it if I find a song not actually go looking. Anyways read and enjoy.**

**PS sorry to every1 who hates me 4 killing off Alice AND she is 100% dead. Truly 100% gone no dreams no coma no nothing. Dead. So again sorry people. **

_**Skillet - Lucy**_

I'll see you in another life in Heaven

Where we never say goodbye

Now that it's over, I just wanna hold her

I'd give up all the world to see

That little piece of Heaven looking back at me

**(X)**

Danny walked into his house. A broken man. His head was going in so many directions. There was so much he had to do. He felt numb. Crushed. Fragmented. He was struggling with how he felt at the moment. The only word that came to mind was hollow. His body an empty shell. A husk which Alice's love had breathed life warmth and vitality into. Without her his life became an empty barren wasteland his life was nothing! He didn't wanna go on without her. The house was too quiet. Her laughter echoed in the walls. All around him. This was too much. 2 hours ago she was alive! 2 hours ago he'd kissed her. A lump lodged in his throat. Just yesterday they had spoke of taking Daniel and Amie to Lapland at Christmas so they could see snow and have a snowball fight. They were babysitting Zoey tomorrow. She wouldn't have planned all this stuff if she was gonna…. He collapsed onto a chair in the living room felt an intense ache in his chest. In the region where his heart used to be. He felt dead inside. Incapable of loving anyone or anything. Incapable of feeling. He wanted his Alice back. He inhaled and exhaled. He felt the air enter and leave his body but he still felt dead. He wanted the love of his life back. Tears fell. He rested his head on his folded arms on his knees. God this hurt. This pain was never ending. It obliterated him. Destroyed him. Turned his soul black. He didn't move once. Then he realised he had 2 kids to consider. He climbed in his truck and drove to Lexi's and Ethan house. They lived in a little caravan on Leopards Den til their house was finished. He pulled to a stop and walked in. Zoey's cot was in the living area. She was asleep on her stomach with her bum in the air. Her lips puckered in sleep. He tried to muster a smile at his sleeping granddaughter but all he felt was heartbreak that Alice wouldn't see her growing up. Ethan was sat there. Shell shocked.

"Lexi is in with the kids. We haven't told them. We didn't know if it would be better coming from you. I would offer you advice but I couldn't say. My head is all over at the minute. I still can't believe." he inhaled. "She's gone!" he choked back a sob. Danny went over and hugged him. Ethan hugged him back tightly. "I am so sorry Danny. For what you've lost. I mean she was our mum but she was your world."

Danny nodded stiffly. Needing no reminders of what he lost.

Lexi walked out of her room her eyes red rimmed from tears she wouldn't allow to fall. All that changed when she saw her dad. She seen him and crumpled.

"Oh dad I want my mum!" she sobbed and ran into his arms. He held her tight. "I want mum!" she repeated. Wrapped her arms around him tightly. Sobbed uncontrollably.

"I can't be a mother without her. She's always been here for me. I need her guidance. I can't lose her. I NEED her." tears trickled from her eyes. "And Daniel and Amie too. I mean I'm grown up and I still need her. Who is gonna be there for them?" her sobs had receded but her tears were now silent.

"Are they asleep?" he asked softly.

"No I told them I had to sort something for Zoey. I was on the verge of breaking down. They kept asking me is mum ok. Is she in hospital. When can they see her. I couldn't take any more questions."

Danny held her. "Look Lex I need you to do something for me. I need you to lie down and try to sleep. Zoey needs her mum well rested and strong ok. So I'm gonna get Daniel and Amie and I want you to have a lie down." her dad told her softly.

"I'll try dad."

"That's my girl."

Danny looked at Ethan over his shoulder. Sent him a silent message. Take good care of her.

Ethan nodded an affirmative.

Danny took a deep breath . Walked into the room where his babies were.

"Dad!" they yelled as they saw him. Fired questions at him.

"How's' mum? Where is she? Could they see her yet? Could they talk to her?"

He put his hand up in the air to silence them

"We are going home right now kids." his told them his voice neutral.

He couldn't take his eyes off her Amie. She was her mother in every way. He had dominated with Lexi but Alice may have made Amy by herself with all the input he had. He shared genetics with her but you couldn't tell. She was all her mother and was a great comfort to him right now. Knowing he had a little Alice with him right now. She sounded like her mother. Had her take no crap attitude. Had her long straight black hair her contagious smile and big clear intense cobalt blue eyes. He looked at his son who also had the same clear blue eyes as his mum.

They walked out of the bedroom.

"You 3 coming too?" Danny asked Lexi and Ethan. They looked at each other and nodded. "I'll pop out and turn off the gas canisters. Ethan said. Lexi was putting clothes and milk into a bag. Zoey had a vast collection of stuff at Leopards den. The kids were loaded into the back of his car. Lexi Ethan and Zoey in theirs. At the house in no time. Everyone walked inside. He stood and looked at the house outside. It Didn't feel like home anymore now that he knew that Alice would never come home to him again. It as bricks and mortar walls and a roof. The woman who had made it a home was gone. And now he had to go in there and tell his kids.

He frowned and looked at his watch. 9:30. 4 hours had passed since Alice had left the house for the final time. She had been dead 3 hours just about. He was still breathing. Still walking and talking. Funny he was under the impression that if your heart was gone you'd die. Someone must have got it seriously wrong. His heart was missing gone and he was still here. Living and breathing. Given a choice he would seriously consider joining Alice right now. Seriously consider it. He waked up the stairs towards his walls and roof and tried to tell himself to go inside. All he could see was him and Alice stood on the porch a few hours ago. The kiss she had promised to continue later. He should have tried harder. Made her stay home! He could have stopped her if he tried harder. But no she had gone and now he had lost her.

He forced his feet to move. One foot in front of the other.

"Daniel Amie, dad needs to talk to you." he told them. They were in the kitchen whispering to each other.

He inhaled a deep breath. They walked down the hallway solemnly.

"Dad?" Amie asked.

"Come into the living room Ames." he said softly. Sat them on the sofa and knelt in front of them.

They sat waiting expectantly.

He inhaled deeply.

"Are you ok dad?" Daniel asked.

He didn't answer.

"Look kids your mum she…" he struggled.

"Dad?" Amie asked softly.

"Your mum was hurt in the bush kids. And the doctors really tried their best to help her but…kids your mum has went to heaven."

Amie started breathing heavily eyes wide.

"NO!" Daniel stood up. Paced angrily. Danny picked Amie up knowing she needed physical comfort right now. She wrapped her arms around his neck felt her silent tears against her neck.

"Daniel" he said softly.

"No mum is not…" he shouted angrily. "She always promised never to leave us! Like you did!"

"Son." he said softly.

Daniel paced faster. Danny could see him desperately trying to hang on to his self control. Hang on to the anger inside himself. Could see him using the techniques Ethan had taught him.

"Why daddy?" Amie asked. Her voice full of emotion.

He rubbed her back. "I dunno sweetie." he murmured.

He saw the second Daniels control snapped. He picked up a lamp and flung it on the floor. It shattered into million pieces.

"Look Amie daddy will come and se you in a bit ok Daniels really upset."

Daniel was throwing the cushions off the sofa. Danny took Amie through to Lexi's room.

"Daniels lost it." he murmured. "Keep her in here."

As soon as he returned to the living room he put his hand on Daniels shoulder. He lashed out and Danny ducked just in time. He was enraged. "How could she leave me?" he yelled. "How could she break a promise?"

Danny pulled him close for a hug. Daniel struggled for an age. Then the strength left his body and he slumped against his dad. He broke down. "Mum." he whispered.

"I know son." Danny sympathised.

"I was so awful to her growing up and now she's gone." he sobbed.

"Your mum knew you loved her. And that's all that matters son. She loves you and is proud of you. Remember that. Remember when you laughed and played and were happy. Forget the bad stuff it didn't matter to her coz you are her baby boy."

Daniel nodded. "I need my mum dad."

"I need her too son. So much!" he admitted holding his son tight.

**A/N ok the kids know now and danny is in deep mourning awwww poor trevanion family :(**


	4. Help From My Friends

Danny sat alone on the veranda. Stared at the phone number in front of him. Punched it in. "Hello Missy here." a gravely voice answered. Rough with sleep.

"Look Miss it's Danny."

"Danny why are you phoning me at midnight? O god it's one of the kids isn't it?" she asked terrified.

"Miss." His voice broke. Breathing heavily.

"Danny your scaring me!" she panicked.

"Miss, it's Alice. She's gone!" he sobbed on the phone.

There was silence on the other end then. "Excuse me, what?" she questioned.

"Missy." he said by way of confirmation.

"No way not Alice. She's invincible!" Missy said in shock. "She…this wouldn't…."

Her sentences weren't even finished before she started a new one. Her brain scrambled for a logical reason to what Danny was saying.

"God Missy I can't believe it. She died Miss and I wanna die too!"

"Look Danny I'll be right there ok." she promised. He heard her voice breaking on the phone.

"Look Miss could you…please I can't say this again."

Missy knew what he was talking about. "I'll tell her mum and Shauna. don't worry."

"Thank you so much Miss."

"Don't mention it." she said.

He heard her whisper oh god Alice not you." as she disconnected. He'd heard the tears in her voice. Felt the heartbreak in it's tone. But whatever she was feeling had nothing on the depth of his devastation. The heartbreak he was experiencing.

(X)

The next night he was sat at the kitchen table. Making preparative notes for Alice's funeral when a whirlwind blew into a kitchen.

"Where's my sister Danny?" a woman yelled. He was pulled from his seat. "Where is she? She demanded. Eyes promising vengeance if he didn't answer her.

"Shauna calm down." Missy said calmly.

"Don't try to tell me she's dead. She wouldn't die when we weren't speaking ok! She would make sure we made up first! Danny tell me where she is. Please tell me she's ok and I can make up with her!"

"I'm sorry Shauna." he said softly.

"Oh God Alice no." she pleaded. Released his shirt. Melissa came up beside her. "I'm such an idiot she died and we hadn't apologised. I wanted so badly to phone her but my stupid pride stood in the way and now I'll never get the chance to tell my sister I love her. To tell her I care. To tell her how sorry I am!" she stressed.

Missy came and hugged Shauna tightly.

"She knew Shauna. Sisters fall out but the love never fades." Danny said tears in his eyes. Cleared his throat.

"Miss um, where is Mrs Elliott?"

"Making her way over later. She fainted when we told her. We would have been here earlier but we took her to hospital and missed our flight. So we flew from Glasgow down to Liverpool and got a connecting flight."

He nodded.

Missy released Shauna and sat her down at the kitchen table.

Danny went to hug Missy. She put up her hand to halt him.

"I'm ok Danny. Thank you but I'm good."

Lexi walked out of her room. Saw Missy stood there.

"Miss?" she asked.

"Lexi." Miss said Lexi ran to her and Missy enveloped her in her rms. Even though Lexi was far taller than Missy comforted her.

"It'll be ok Lex." she soothed. "She hasn't left you completely you know. She's still here. I can feel here." she whispered. "How about I talk to you later yeah." she encouraged.

Ever since the pregnancy when Lexi was 18 she and Missy were so closer.

Lexi nodded. "Then you can meet Zoey too."

Missy nodded. "You mean mini Ethan?"

"You spoke to mum then?" Lexi's voice wobbled. "She sent me hundreds and I mean hundreds of pictures," Missy replied.

"Yeah she was so proud. Hello Shauna." she said coldly.

"Lexi." Shauna said sadly. She was sat at the table her face in shock. Her cheeks tear stained.

"Don't Lex. She's lost her best friend. Forget what happened yeah?"

Lexi shook her head. It seemed Missy still had to play peacemaker. Lexi wasn't gonna make it easy for Shauna. "Mum wouldn't want her here. She told her to go and not come back."

"Lexi." Danny warned.

Shauna stood up. "You want me gone Lex?" Shauna asked softly.

"Yes! It's what mum said!"

"Lexi your wrong!" Danny told her.

"No I'm not mum hated her coz of what she said about Daniel." Lexi hissed.

"And I regretted that every day!"

"I know you didn't phone her saying sorry did you? Not that she would of listened!"

"Lex your mum had planned to phone Shauna over the weekend. It broke her heart that they weren't talking she said that Missy and Shauna had been such a massive part of her life for so long that she had to try."

"Well I still don't want her here!" Lexi said stiffly.

"She is your mothers best friend and staying Alexis. End of discussion."

Father and daughter glared at each other. Lexi backed off. "Zoey needs me!" she went to her room he knew she wouldn't slam the door as not to startle the baby. Didn't mean she didn't want to.

Danny ran his hands though his hair.

"I can go Danny." Shauna told him.

"No Shauna. You stay." he stressed. "It's what Alice would have wanted. Lexi knows that too. She's just hurt."

He exhaled tiredly and sat down.

"Do you mind if I borrow your phone to ring James?" Shauna asked.

"Go ahead." Danny told her. Sat down opposite his notes.

"I'm not gonna ask if your ok Danny coz it's obvious your not." Missy said softly. Sat opposite him. "How are the kids coping?"

He scribbled away on his pad. Ignored her. Dropped his pen and covered his eyes.

"Lexi is angry. Daniel alternates between anger and sadness. Amie. She cries a lot. I found her crying at the breakfast table this morning. Her tears falling into her cheerio's. Amie doesn't understand why she had to go. I worry about her. She internalises like Alice used to."

Missy nodded. "Are you internalising too?"

"I'm focusing on my kids."

"You have feelings too." she told him.

"Not anymore. Any feelings I had are going to be buried along with my wife. Along with my heart soul and everything else I pledged to her until the end of time!"

"You need to feel it Danny. Grieve."

"Alice is the only one how understood me. Feelings wise. I don't even understand my feelings. But she did. How do I mourn without her here to help me? Missy she was the other half of me. My light in the dark. My water in the desert. My flower in a barren wasteland. All of that is gone now. I remember she told me that she used to say she wanted to take my place on that plane when it crashed so I wouldn't have to go through that. But you know I would endure an eternity of that to have her back. I always said I wouldn't let her trade coz I'm not string enough to live without her. I'm sat here planning her funeral for Gods sake. Her funeral! I mean this is insane. The very thought of her dead is just wrong. Alice should never die. She should live forever coz I can barely breathe knowing I have to live without her now. Can you tell me how to survive without her Missy? Please?"

It was a heartfelt plea. His eyes still covered. He was audibly breathing.

"Danny take it one day at a time. And be thankful that your kids are here. They are all part of Alice. The best part of her and you. Your love is immortalised by them. You'll always love her and miss her. And your heart will always belong to her, but given time and you'll mend. And you'll breathe. And the pain will gradually lessen until it's just an ache. Memories will come to you and you'll remember them with a happy fondness rather than gut wrenching pain. It'll happen Danny. It'll take time."

"I need her though Missy."

"And your kids need you so falling apart isn't an option."

"Falling apart sounds really good Missy." he admitted.

They sat in silence. She dropped her head. "I can't believe I'm not ever gonna see her again. She's like this huge personality and to think something like that can just be gone in a second…"

He put his hand over hers. She looked at it. Breathed. I'm sorry I'm here to support you and yet I'm moaning all over you."

"No Miss your not. Your grieving too." he told her softly.

"Shauna is really pulling herself to bits about all this. She isn't listening to anyone. The person who could get through to her when she was like this was Alice. She was always good at getting people to calm down. Talk see the bigger picture. Me I am only good at reading people's feelings. Alice was the talker. Shauna has never had to deal with anything like this alone coz Alice was always by her side telling her everything was gonna be ok."

He nodded.

"Danny this sounds daft but you need to cry." Missy told him seriously.

"Huh?"

"You need to cry. For Daniel."

"Miss I have no idea what….."

"Look Danny your staying strong for your kids. Good. Great. But you have a son. Who already struggles with his feelings. He's still a fair few years from being a teenager but as you know he's in a few classes above so he's with kids who are on the cusp of being teenagers. He probably hears things like men don't cry. That isn't fair on him Daniel he can't bottle this up. He needs to release it and the only way he'll do that is if he sees you releasing it too. How will he feel if he cries and you don't? please Danny show your son it's ok to cry."

"Miss I'm sorry but I can't. I can't cry." his voice shook. "I'm barely holding it together as it is!"

She raised her hands and let them drop. Exhaled. "Ok then. Bottle this up. Show your son how to be an emotionally cut off man."

"Alice was their mother Missy. She did all the emotional stuff with them."

"And as their father it's your job now!" she retorted.

"I liked you better when you made fun of me." he said not at all in fun.

"Yeah well serious Miss is here for the duration. Get used to it."

They were both silent.

"Why can't you cry Danny?" she asked.

"Coz once I start. I always get worried that I'll not be able to stop. Now my son doesn't need to see his father fall apart like that. That would be damaging!"

"Pretend then. Wipe your face or eyes. It would be better if he seen it but implying it could work."

"But…"

"Remember what it was like if you fell in the school yard and cried? How your friends took the mick. I bet you that's what he thinks about. How he has all this emotion but can't release it coz boys don't do that! It's probably at the root of his anger. His sadness is getting turned into anger coz he knows how to deal with that!"

"I'll talk to him Miss." he said softly.

Again silence fell. She began thinking of all the times she had with Alice when they were kids. Her heart was saddened that they were never experience that again.

"She was lucky to have you as a friend Missy." he told her. "Not many people would do this for their best friends son. Asking their dad to cry for them. Pretty awkward subject." he told her.

"The 3 of us were lucky to have each other. We complemented each other really well."

"I've never seen this side of you before." he mentioned.

"I don't often have to act like this. Only when I feel strongly about something. Last time I had to act like this was when you disappeared."

He stared at his paper.

"I gotta plan her funeral Miss. It's so hard."

"What you got so far?"

He pushed his pad across the table at her. All he had wrote was Alice. Beside it was written Danny. Then doodled all over was Alice Trevanion.

"I have no idea where to start Miss."

"Your still in shock Danny."

"Shock? Miss I don't feel shock I feel numb. I keep expecting her to walk right through that front door and smile at me."

"I can give you a hand with the funeral." she offered.

"It's ok Miss."

"Danny use me while I'm here. That's why I came. To help you."

He looked at her and nodded.

"Danny do you feel ok to tell me…how she died.? I just keep imagining all these awful scenarios. Like maybe she was mauled or trampled or shot or I dunno…." she exhaled.

He shook his head "It was none of them. Her official cause of death of death was massive blood loss."

Missy frowned. Confused. How did she lose so much blood if she wasn't mauled. She wondered.

He saw the question in her eyes.

"She was er, pinned between a truck and a tree. Her legs were completely crushed. One of her bones severed a major artery. The truck was the only thing maintaining her blood pressure. When they moved it her blood pressure and plummeted and she died within 30 minutes."

He put is face in his hands to hide the naked emotion on her face.

"Danny don't hide your face. It's ok to cry and grieve. It makes you more of a man when you do that in front of people. It means your completely confident in who you are and completely confident in yourself as man!"

"I dunno Miss."

She sensed he was tired. "Same time and place tomorrow? I'll help you with the arrangements. You know music flowers…"

He nodded and watched as she walked away.

**A/N and missy is here supporting danny like she did alice in my previous story**


	5. Goodbye

**A Week Passed**

All the stuff for Alice's funeral had been arranged except her song. He and Missy couldn't find one. She told him he had final say on everything but she had been right about everything else so far. So he asked her honest opinion. They listened to all of Alice's favourite music but decided it might be best to leave that alone as the kids wanna listen to it one day and they didn't want it associated with bad memories. So they went on youtube and listened to what felt like a million songs but they hadn't heard the perfect song yet.

"We gotta pick a song Miss."

"What's this we? You gotta pick a song I'm just your little helper." she was lying on the sofa shattered. It was 11 o'clock.

"C'mon Miss you've helped me every step of the way so far."

"To be honest Danny I'm so tired I'm about ready to turn my Ipod on and say yes to the first song that's on there!"

"Ok then do it."

"Huh?" she asked and yawned.

He felt a surge of guilt.

"Try it." he encouraged. "Then we can go to bed."

She pulled out her Ipod and pressed play. They listened to the song. Looked at each other.

"The context of the song is all wrong." Missy told him.

"That chorus though." he told her.

"And…" Missy started.

"Miss it felt like an Alice song to me. Did you feel it?"

This song did remind her of her friends like.

She nodded and scribbled down the name. "I'll get this sorted onto a CD for you." she said lying back down.

"Miss you haven't cried yet." he said softly.

She opened one eye and peered at him. "Neither have you."

"Miss."

"Danny." she replied. "Don't preach to me ok. Don't tell me to cry when you won't cry yourself!" she told him.

"Miss I don't want you getting ill. You know repressing all these feelings and stuff." he told her.

"Maybe I feel the same way about you. You could get ill too!" Miss retorted. Closed her eye again.

"I spoke to Daniel about what you said. We had a man to man chat. You know heart to heart sort of thing. It was weird he really opened our after some encouragement. Shed a few tears. We both did." actually when he had saw his sons eyes glistening he hadn't been able to hold back and he ended up sobbing. Daniel of course had then started crying and they were wrapped each other in each others arms crying their hearts out. His son then tried to act like the tough hard man to cover up his crying but Danny told him that real men care and real men cry. It's harder to show emotion then bottle it up. If you cry it means their heart is real. And not hard and cold. Missy had been right his son had needed to se him cry.

She stretched. "That's good. Danny me, Shauna and Mrs Elliott are heading back to Glasgow a couple of days after Alice's funeral. I can stick around through if you need me."

"No it's ok. You've got a life to get back to."

"I want Lexi to make up with Shauna before we go. She's shut herself off though." she sat up. And yawned. Rubbed her face.

"You can't fix everything Miss." he told her.

"I know but it feels wrong Danny. Alice's' daughter and best friend unable to speak to each other."

"Lexi will come around. She did with Ethan and he did far worse." Danny explained.

"Danny she has you conned. She and Ethan aren't together."

"Yes they are." he told her.

"They live together and will continue until Zoey is 3 or 4. But they are not together in any sense. Physical or otherwise. Haven't been since she was pregnant. What I can't understand is why. There is love there but they refuse to be together."

"Wow. I thought they were happy." he mused.

"They are. And they love each other but are so scared of getting hurt again so they just live together. For now anyway." she told him

"God we are so messed up!" he said tormented.

"Not anymore than the rest of us." she told him.

"I can believe she's conned us for all this time."

She wanted you and her mum to think she was happy. She and Ethan do seem happy. And they are great with Zoey naturals. They asked me to be her Godmother. I was shocked!"

"That's really great. You'd make a good mother."

"I see lots of Lexi in Zoey. She's got that cute little tilt that Lexi inherited from you. She just cocks her head to one side. It's adorable."

"Missy why don't you and Karl have a couple of kids?" he asked.

He recognised the look in her eyes. The sparkle.

She smiled wryly. "Trust me to get broody at 40 huh?"

"What so you do want kids now?" Danny asked.

"O I dunno. I just sat with Zoey and I'd never had the feeling of holding my own child." she shrugged. "I dunno if I love Karl enough to have kids with him. A dog maybe?"

Danny laughed. Startled himself as it escaped.

Missy saw his face change.

"Danny it's ok you know. You didn't die too."

"A week Miss. It has only been a week!"

"And you smiled and laughed for one second. Alice'd be happy I made you laugh. She'd hate seeing you like this. It always hurt her to see you upset or in pain."

"I know but it should have taken longer for me to laugh I mean God a week!"

"So tomorrow's the day then?" she asked taking his mind off his second of laughter. He'd beat him self up about it if he didn't stop thinking about it.

He nodded sadly.

"Everything sorted?"

He nodded again.

"Are you ready?"

He froze and she reached across and squeezed his hand. "You'll be fine." she assured him

He looked at their hands for a second. "I really hope so Miss."

(X)

Shauna was sat in Missy's room. Melissa walked in yawning. Got a shock.

She screamed halfway through a yawn. Then shook her head. "Christ Shauna. You nearly gave me a freaking heart attack! GOD!" her hand over her heart.

"Miss I'm worried about you." Shauna said seriously.

"Me?" she asked confused. "I'm fine. You should be worried about Danny!"

"Oh no!" Shauna moaned. Covered her face with her hand. Shook her head.

"What?" Missy asked perplexed.

"I knew it! I knew this would happen. She's up there and she's laughing her head off. God she'd find this hilarious. She couldn't have planned it better no actually you know what I bet she did plan this! This has her signature all over it!"

"Who? What? Shauns I'm shattered so can you stop with the gibberish I really need to go to sleep!"

"Miss, your falling for Danny."

"WHAT? Have you lost your mind?" she shrieked. "I mean REALLY lost your marbles?"

Shauna looked at her face. Saw her eyes. The slightly glazed look.

"O God look at you it's blatant." Shauna spun her and pointed to the mirror.

"No Shauna that is called extreme fatigue! How do you mix up love and sleep deprivation? I'm not in love. You know what I'm not even gonna dignify your ridiculous suggestion with a response!"

"You shouldn't have done that Miss. He'll break your heart!"

Missy's eyes narrowed. "Shauna you have feel out of your tree and landed on your head this time. I have NOT nor will I EVER fall for Danny in any way shape or form. God he's Alice's husband for one. Her grieving husband. She's only been gone a week and your suggesting this!"

"Miss he's still good looking and young-ish."

"Yeah well I suppose so." She paused. "But so is James doesn't mean I'm gonna visit him and fall for him. You've forgot 2 important things Shauna. 1 Danny is still in love with our best friend and 2 Karl!"

"That's why I'm warning you to back off Miss. I don't want you hurt." Shauna told her softly.

"I'm helping him Shauna. He's in bits. He needs a friend."

Shauna looked at her sympathetically. "O you got it bad Miss. He's gonna obliterate you. Really!"

"How many times I do NOT love Danny!"

"Hey I didn't say you loved him. I said fall for him!"

Missy raised her hands in silent prayer. "Shauna." she said softly and calmly. "I feel nothing for Danny. Except maybe sympathy and a combined sadness over Alice. I have no romantic feelings or notions over him. He is grieving for Gods sake!" she hissed at the end. Her patience wearing thing.

Shauna shrugged realising she was pushing Missy too far. She'd realise eventually. Missy wasn't convinced by the shrug.

"Shauna me and Alice were always chalk and cheese when it came to men we liked. He's not even my type! Plus he sees me as a sister."

"No Miss he sees me as a sister. He met me years before he met you. He's never mentioned once about seeing you as a sister. Plus he flirted with you when Alice was alive. Harmless flirting but flirting none the less."

"Shauna listen carefully. Me and Danny have no feelings for each other. Ok. I am not falling for him and he has NEVER flirted with me EVER. God grief has scrambled your brains!"

"I warned you Miss. I tried. Don't blame me if it comes back to bit you on the ass!" Shauna walked from the room.

Missy collapsed on her bed shaking her head. Wondering where Shauna got such a foolish idea. She suddenly could have swore she heard Alice laughing.

**A/N ok so shauna thinks miss might b falling 4 danny wot do u fink? i have had reviews sayin wot a gud friend she is oooo have opinions changed? x :D**


	6. Support

The funeral had been and gone. Went surprising well for what it was. Danny stood by his kids. Before the funeral Missy had heard Danny talking to Daniel as he tied his tie. Told him that real men cry. Told him to let his grief show but if he didn't want to cry that was fine too. He didn't have to cry to show his mum he loved her. Daniel had nodded. He'd then spoke to Amie in low hushed tones. Heard him consoling her. Missy had been in talking to Lex.

"Give Shauna a chance please Lex. Today is hard enough."

Lex nodded. Missy saw her expression. "She's really gone huh Miss?"

"I'm sorry Lex but yeah." Missy knew this for sure. She went with Danny to put some stuff in her coffin. Letters and pictures. The funeral director asked if they wanted to see her. She had looked at Danny in panic. Like Oh my god that would be weird. Creepy. They had went through though. She had just lay there. Looking normal. Looking asleep. That had hurt. That had been the worst. She had the biggest urge to shake her. Wake her up then strangle her for scaring them. Missy had whispered her nickname from years ago. Just once, just to try. Knowing if anything would provoke a reaction that would. She had swallowed thickly when Alice didn't move. Didn't twitch. Didn't breathe. The sight of her best friend just lying there….

"Miss? You ok?" Lexi asked. Had noticed that her face had changed slowly.

Missy shook her head. Cleared her throat. "I'm ok Lex." Cleared her throat again. "I just need a minute."

Missy had held it together the entire time she had been here. She'd go home and grieve for her friend in private. Where they had grew up.

"Your mum would be so proud of how well you've done. Carried on for Zoey." Missy told her.

"I had no choice. She needs me."

"I'm proud too Lex."

"Thanks Miss."

"Look I'm not trying to replace Alice. And I'm not a mother or anything but I'm a good friend. Yours as well as your mums. I'm only a phone call away if you ever need me. Or a shoulder to cry on. Or someone to vent or put a smile on your face. I'll make time for you ok."

Lexi nodded. Eyes glistening.

"C'mere kid." Missy hugged her tight. Ribbed her back and closed her eyes.

Danny looked in. saw Missy hugging his daughter. He had heard every word she said. Alice had a good friend there. The best. He walked away. Didn't wanna intrude on a private moment

Anyway the funeral had came. Shauna had cried. Wrapped in her mothers arms who wiped her eyes at intervals cried silently. Missy stood between Amie and Lexi. Amie cried silently. Her dad picked her up and rubbed her back. Whispered softly in her ear. Daniel too shed a few tears and Danny refrained from rubbing Amie's back to pat his walked on the other side of him. Daniel leaned into her side. Ethan had his arm around Lexi's shoulder in support. His eyes glistened with unshed tears. Lexi cried. As did Nomsa. Caroline. Dupe stood between them stoically. She and Danny didn't cry though. After the service Mrs Elliott had came over and asked if she was ok.

"I'm fine. I promise. I just grieve on my own. In Glasgow where we grew up. The kids need someone strong I won't fall apart till I'm alone." Mrs Elliott hugged. Her. "Cry Melissa. It's ok to cry."

After that she looked at Danny and he nodded she pressed play on the CD player. Jordin Sparks Tattoo started. This morning Danny had came to her and wanted to change the song. She had suggested they keep it. In her eyes the song was about changing an growing up even if you don't want to. About how things hurt but you'll feel better. About making mistakes and then moving on from them learning from them. About how things will be different but you can't look back and live in the past coz there are good things ahead. About how the people you love are always with you inside your heart and they never leave you. And finally the chorus, it encapsulated Alice especially the line lived every second like it was my last one! The whole chorus actually. She stopped to listen to it.

**I can't waste time so give it a moment.**

**I realise nothings broken.**

**Don't need to worry about everything I've done.**

**Lived every second like it was my last one.**

**Don't look back got a new direction**

**I love you once, needed protection.**

**Your still a part of everything I do.**

**Your on my heart just like a tattoo.**

**Just like a tattoo. **

**I'll always have you.**

The song was no longer on her Ipod. She'd never listen to it ever again. It would be too hard. She made her way towards the house alone. She needed 5 minutes to compose herself. Mrs Elliott watched her walk away frowning.

"She's internalising huh mum?" Shauna asked.

"Yeah. It's not good all this bottling.""I'll talk to her yeah. We need to do this. It might be good if we grieve together you know." Shauna told her.

They followed Danny's family back up to the house.

Missy sat on the veranda in the dark. She heard Danny in the study talking to Amie. Amie was talking to her dad about angels and visiting. This just wasn't fair! You know what God should have taken her instead. I mean she had no kids to leave behind! Now she was listening to her nephew and niece cry and she couldn't do a damn thing about it. She hated feeling helpless. She only felt helpless once and she swore she'd never feel like that again. Her motto was she was never helpless and always in control. It was how she wasn't crying now. Her emotions were under lock and key. A cast iron grip. Never loosening.

"Daddy do you think the other angels will be nice to mummy or will they pick on her. I hope they don't coz I don't want her to be sad and cry!"

Her breath caught when she heard Amie say that. Oh God she couldn't listen to that! That cast iron grip she spoke of. Had just loosened there. She heard Danny inhale a big breath. Couldn't listen to his reply. Jogged down the steps and walked absently. Shauna watched her from the front door.

Missy walked inhaling clean sweet air trying to force the sadness out of her body with every exhale. Found herself at a mound of earth. Walked so she stood in front of a wooden cross baring Alice's name.

"Now how did I end up here?" she whispered. Well dur you walked! "I can almost heart your sarcastic reply….almost." Missy was silent. "The service was good today. Good for what it was you know." she had never been so unsure of what to say in her entire life. She inhaled. "I never expected you to leave Ali I really didn't." a tear rolled down her cheek she swiped at it angrily. Told them to go away she didn't cry in front of people. "I mean you don't die Alice. You just don't!" more fell. She swiped at them trying vainly to stop them from falling.

"The 3 of us were always together. A trio. All for one and one for all. Now your gone and me and Shauna are a double act. But that is wrong. As I said when we were 15 the insane one is missing. Difference is you were in Bristol then. Now your gone forever" she sat down. Her legs felt wobbly. "This is so hard. I'm struggling Alice. I'm fighting trying to hold it together coz your kids need to see people being strong and Danny is bottling it up. And Shauna and your mum are crying and poor Eth and Lexi have Zoey and I'm trying but Alice I need to know how I'm here. Why I'm here. Why am I crying at your grave. You aren't allowed to die yet! You don't die." she said sadly. Her thoughts all over so her speech came out sounding stupid coz she said it so quickly. Her elbows rested on her knees and her face was in her hands. Finally let her tears fall freely.

"This is so typical you. You always made me face up to my feelings. Never let me do my own thing. Out in the open you said. Proves you care. Alice you're my best friend my sister. I care, I love you." she said softly as even more tears fell.

She felt someone lift her from behind and was pulled into a strong arms. Arms held her tight but still in a soft embrace. She knew it was Danny. Knew he was crying too. Felt his chest shaking softly.

"I'm so sorry Miss. Your grieving too but trying to stay strong for all of us. It didn't occur to me that you needed comfort too." his voice shook.

She was too choked up to speak. So she hugged him back. Offering comfort as well as receiving it.

"I'm here if you need a shoulder Miss. Come if you need someone to listen."

Her tears dried as did his. "I'm fine." she said her voice gravely. "I just heard Amie talking to you about angels. And she broke my heart. She's so much like her mother it's terrifying."

He smiled. A ghost of it's former glory.

"She reminds me more of her mother every day."

They walked back to the house side by side. "It's good to know you didn't dominate the whole of the gene pool. That Alice came through somewhere."

"She'll forget her mum. Forget how alike they are." he said angry but at the same time tortured.

"Course she won't. she had you and Lex and Ethan and Daniel. Me and Shauna when we can come down. She won't forget her mum. She'll see her every time she looks in the mirror. Except her smile. She had your smile, well your old smile." Alice told me. She elaborated. "She saw the pictures of you when you were a kid. She told me all of the kids inherited your cocky smile."

They sat on the veranda.

"I miss her so much Missy. Just the closeness. I miss my wife. My lover. My best friend."

"A day at a time Danny. It won't heal but it'll get better."

"God I'm doing it again I'm sorry Miss."

She ignored his statement. "How did you know where I was?"

"Shauna was worried about you. I was too when she told me you looked upset."

"You don't have to worry me Danny."

"I worry about people I care about. My kids. You, Shauna and Mrs Elliott."

"Tough as old boots me. I'm fine. Thanks anyway. For looking out for me." she patted his shoulder.

When she left he was sat on his veranda. Feeling cold and alone.

**A/N aw and danny now supportin Missy. :D x**


	7. Changes

**6 Months Later**

"Happy Birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Zoey. Happy birthday to you!"

It was Zoey's first birthday. Kids of all ages ran around hours earlier. Now it was all silent and Ethan had a camcorder capturing Zoey's with handfuls of cake. She was getting it in her hair and all over her sleeveless pick sundress.

"Put it in your mouth baby girl." opened his mouth wide to show her. He closed it as she out some cake in her mouth and smiled.

"That's my baby." he chortled. "Is that nice?"

He gestured Lexi over. She grabbed the camcorder. He went beside his daughter. "Is that nice Zo-Zo?" he asked and laughed as she shoved her open hand in his face.

"I'll have some later baby." smiled at her lovingly. Filled with pride at the sight of her.

She patted both her hands on his cheeks and hair. Lexi caught his shocked expression on camera. He laughed. "Dada is now covered in cake" he said picking Zoey up.

"da da da da." she chortled. He was shocked. Amie could say a few words but so far she hadn't said da da.

"What was that sweetie?" he coaxed.

She was silent.

He pointed to Lexi.

"Mama." she said grinning. Her bottom two teeth looked so adorable. He pointed to himself.

"dada dada!" she chortled. He filled up. "I'm a dada." he said to Lexi

Zoey proceeded to put cake crumbs in his hair. She turned the camera off.

"You sure are a dada Ethan. The best dada ever. I'm surprised she took this long to say it. You've had her in training since I was hmmmm bout 2 months pregnant. I heard you at night dada against my stomach. Honestly I thought she was gonna be born chanting dada!" she laughed.

He grinned.

"Liv's pregnant." she told him.

"Wow really?" he asked.

"Yeah. She was subtly saying that the time is right for us to have another child. Only so hers has a playmate."

"Do you think we should start telling people we aren't together?" played with his daughter's fingers. Zoey thought it was the height of amusement.

Lexi shrugged. "You know the questions will follow and I like the way we are. And this way stupid martin keeps off my back!"

She had found out why she and Bob had been given all those extra shifts at work. Martin fancied her and liked seeing her so he got her into work. Till Ethan had came in and acted all lovey dovey with hr after Bob told her about Martin. He had then backed off.

Zoey tugged at her brown hair. That was what she did when she was tired. Her eyes were blinky. "My baby girl is ready for a bottle and a nap. I'll sort her." he said was about to walk away. When he stopped.

"What you tell Liv about us having another one?"

Lexi smiled at him. "I told her we'd think about it. That you had been hinting that we try for a boy this time."

He laughed as he walked away. Liv and Thabo had had came off their honeymoon 6 weeks ago. Thabo obviously hadn't wasted no time. The thought that was going around his head was another child with Lexi. Hmmmm. If they were together he'd waste no time. But that was the point they weren't together. They loved each other. Said it every day/. They were more in love now that the physical side of their relationship was over. They didn't argue anymore, but they were only a partnership when it came to Zoey. He knew that the time was gonna come when he was gonna have to leave his baby girl. Go live somewhere else. He ran his hands down her cheek. He loved Lexi and Zoey so much it hurt but he knew that he and Lexi couldn't be together. They messed up each others heads. His life felt like it was at a crossroads. He looked down at his baby who had fell asleep drinking her bottle. He went to the room and laid her down in her cot. Kissed her soft brown hair. She really was his clone. He loved her more than life. Couldn't imagine his life without her. The only person who would ever fully own his heart. Only person he would love unconditionally. "dada loves you millions baby."

Ethan was sat on the bed in Zoey's room in leopards Den. Danny had already gave her one. He was disillusioned with his life. With his job. He pondered. He didn't want a new relationship yet but it might be good to start meeting people. Getting to know them. Hmmm. He thought longer. His job. He just didn't feel the passion for it anymore. He wanted to work with kids with difficulties. Help them. But he didn't do that. It was just crap executives who were forced to see him coz they beat up their wife. It was all he could do not to tear them apart in his office. Especially the ones who didn't care who they hurt, wife or kids the ones who saw their families as possessions. All he did was listen to people complain. Then he offered them the same advice which they never took. He didn't complete his degree to work with people like that. It was rubbish and soul destroying! He needed change. He decided that tomorrow he'd go see the fire department. Volunteer for a while cut his hours at work. He should have done it 18 months ago when he'd first thought of it originally but stuff cropped up. Not this time thought. He had to do this.

**A/N filler chapter really setting the scene for the changes which are coming in Ethan's life.**


	8. Ethan's Disgust

**9am The Next Morning**

Ethan drove to Glen Afric Fire station. Stood outside a dilapidated building. He looked at it in disgust "No freaking way." he murmured.

The front door stuck as he opened it. He pushed hard. It flew open a man was sat in a office. Ethan looked at the engines walked towards them. His disgust grew when he saw they were in poor repair. Full of grease and dried mud. He picked off lump of mud.

How on earth do they help people with equipment like this? This is disgraceful! he wandered towards the back. He felt ill when he saw the equipment they were given to protect themselves. It was 30 years out of date. At least! They would be better going in naked then with this crap.

"Who are you and why are you back here. This area is for personnel only!"

"I had came looking to volunteer." he said. Had!

The fireman looked him over. "We're always looking for new people. What experience do you have if any?"

"5 years in New Zealand. I'm fully trained." he gave the equipment a look of pure disgust.

The man blanched at his declaration of being fully trained.

"I'll take your name and number. Call you when we have an opening."

Ethan was confused. Then remembered Dupes warning over a year ago. He'd feel threatened by him. "You said you needed new people."

"I didn't means right now." the man replied.

"How many people you got?" Ethan asked.

"Enough." The fire man replied nonchalantly.

"Not many then." Ethan said dismissively.

"7." the fireman said arrogantly.

"What in right now?" Ethan asked.

"Nope, altogether."

"What?" Ethan yelped. "What if you have a serious fire? In the township? What is 7 people gonna do?"

"We are a sub unit from Johannesburg. We aren't needed much."

"It's still no freaking excuse. I wanna talk to your team leader. This stuff is disgraceful it needs sorted!" he fumed.

"Who the hell are you to talk like that?"

"Someone who will go to the newspapers if this crap isn't sorted out I mean God you people are supposed to help people but you won't be able if your stuff falls apart. So team leader!"

"Your speaking to him!"

"How'd I know? God your older than the hills. Were probably playing with a stone age ball back into the day."

The team leaders eyes narrowed.

"Have you seen the state of your engines huh? When were they last cleaned? Properly? Given a good going over. A checklist making sure everything is working?"

"Regularly!"

"Bullshit!" Ethan spat in reply. Walked back in the equipment room.

"And your equipment. GOD! Have you ever lost anybody?"

"I've worked here 40 years and I haven't lost one person!"

"That equipment is at least 40 years old! Why not send them in with nothing at all?"

The men walked in at the sound of Ethan shouting.

"I mean look at this stuff." he picked up a jacket. "Ripped!" he flung it on the floor. Picked up another. "Half melted." Joined that on the floor. "Cracked hat. Taped together!" flung it across the room. "You can't tell me you actually use this stuff!" he yelled. "Does someone have to die before you sort this crap out?"

The men looked at him open mouthed. They had raised issue with the equipment but got the no money excuse. The only reason they stayed was because people needed help.

"Your getting out of here now!" the head firefighter said.

"No your gonna tell me why your men don't have adequate protection!"

"I'm phoning the police." he said walking away.

Ethan looked at the fire-fighters. "You gonna let him get away with this? Look at this stuff!"

"What can we do?" another man asked.

"Get rid of him for a start. My team leader in New Zealand would be pissed if he saw the crap you were using!"

"You worked in New Zealand?" Another man asked.

Ethan nodded. "5 years. Completed my certificate over there."

"Your qualified?" Another asked.

"Yeah. Aren't you?"

"We're volunteers and have had the most basic of training. The reason he is still in charge is that there is no one qualified to take over."

The police walked in. Oh great he was getting arrested.

"Look get this sorted. Before one of you is killed coz it will happen!" Ethan warned. "It's your lives at risk."

"C'mon sir." the policeman grabbed hi arm to lead him out. He saw the team leader looking superior. Ethan was in his face in a second.

"If anyone dies it's on your head. That equipment is disgraceful!" he spat.

Ethan was restrained and led away. The men watched.

"What you looking at? Get back to work!" the team leader hissed at them.

(X)

Danny had did his rounds at the hospital quickly, efficiently. Without any real feeling. Just like he did everything else these days. He sat on the veranda with a bottle of coke. He had no surgery today. Thank God. He had been fully booked for 4 days solid. It was hard. At first he kept going to ask someone to swab or pass the stitches. He even looked for her a few times. His heart broke all over again when he realised she was wasn't there. God he missed her. More than he had ever missed anyone in his life. He felt like he was missing a limb. It had been an organ at first, something that had been essential to living. He had felt like he was dying inside slowly. But no, now it was a limb because he was still here. Living. Breathing. Even though his heart hadn't beat for 6 months. God is that all it had been? It felt like 6 years. Actually closer to 60 years. A minute without her felt like an eternity. A day was never ending. Until he could go to bed. And dream of her. Sometimes he never wanted to wake. Just sleep forever. Keep her with him forever his love and devotion for her burned inside him as hot as ever. He missed her more every single day. He woke up thinking nope I couldn't possibly miss her more than I already do but as the day wears on and he feels further away, the distance between them magnifies and his seclusion increases and he feels like he can barely breath with the grief that squeezes the air from his lungs! His favourite song at the minute. Skillet don't wake me. He thought of the lyrics

**Don't wake me**

**We're together just you and me**

**Don't wake me**

**Coz we're happy like we used to be**

**And now I gotta let you go**

**But I don't wanna be alone**

**These dreams of you keep on going in circles**

**It ain't enough but it's all I have**

**Nothing to do but keep sleeping on coz**

**Don't wanna stop coz I want you back!**

The song just echoed him perfectly. He never wanted to be woken from his dreams. The only place he could be with his one true love again.

A car pulled beside the front door. A tall slim woman with dancing brown eyes and blond hair climbed out. Melissa had came. Unannounced as usual.

"Hey hey Danny boy!" she said when she saw him.

He walked down the stairs and hugged her quickly. Felt warmth and comfort in her arms. He wanted to stay a second longer but she pulled away.

"What you doing here Miss?"

"I had a meeting in Johannesburg. Decided to see my favourite people." she paused. "Too bad you're here." she sniffed in playful disgust.

He pushed her softly. "Poor you."

"I suppose you'll have to do." she said in a mock posh voice in a bored tone.

"I'm sure you'll find a way to entertain yourself!" his melancholy thoughts of Alice gone.

"If you insist." she teased.

They walked inside the house. Stopped at the kitchen table. He put her bag down.

She looked around. "Where is everyone?"

"Kids are at school. Zoey at playgroup. Lexi is at work and Ethan is... out for a wander most probably. Who knows."

"O so I could torture you and no one would know. No one knows I'm here. The perfect crime!" she giggled evilly. She was acting the same way as always.

"Lex is home soon so you can't. Sorry to burst your bubble!" he retorted but started backing off in jest.

"Trust me this won't take long. I won't the way to get you Alice told me you were…."she quieted and her smile disappeared. So did his.

"God I miss her Danny." Missy declared. "I didn't see her much but we spoke on the phone all the time. I found myself dialling this number to speak to her you know."

"I know I do that to. Talk to her. Ask a question then I realise she isn't here!" he admitted.

"Anyway." he said changing the subject. "Why are you here in Jo'burg?"

"I met a client and decided to come see you all."

"Admit it!" he said. "Your were saving the pennies staying here instead of a hotel."

"Damn your on to me!" she rolled her eyes.

"You always were obvious Miss." he said simply.

"How has everyone been?" she asked softly.

"Ethan has been doing grief counselling with the kids they're responding really well actually. Lexi is slowly getting back to her Lexi self still misses her mum terribly her phone calls with you help though."

"You know about those?" she blushed.

"Lex is alone when you speak but I can tell when she's spoke to you. She more upbeat."

She nodded. "And you?"

He shrugged. "I'm still here. Surviving. I just miss her so much!"

"Of course you do." she said in understanding

This is what he liked about Missy. He could tell her something like that and she didn't go all mushy and sympathetic on him. She just granted understanding and moved on.

"How's Shauna?" he asked. He knew she struggled. Especially getting over the fact that and she and Alice weren't talking when she died.

"Not AS guilty but you know Shauna. She phones me often. Very often. Needs reassurance about stuff. Probably worried I'm, gonna leave her too. She's talking to the wrong person for reassurance though. I'm no good at stuff like that. I struggle with what to say. I'm not naturally a reasurative optimistic person. Inside I'm quite dark and some days it's hard to repress it." she suddenly quieted realising she said too much.

He frowned at what she said. Was confused. "You aren't dark Miss. Plus who the hell told you your no good at it? Your great at this stuff. I dunno if I would have gotten through that time without you."

Missy shook her head. "You would have Danny. Your strong. A survivor. You'd have found a way. Your stubborn. It's why Alice loved you."

He shrugged in denial.

"I guess neither one of us knows how to take a complement.

He smiled and her heart stopped for a second. She frowned.

"What?" he asked at her frown.

"Nothing." she said lightly breezily. Just nothing she told herself. That's what nothing! "Do you mind if I stay here?" she asked.

"Of course not. Alice would have me if I turned you away."

"I trained her well." she joked. "She loved her Miss."

"She did love you Melissa." he told her.

"Course she did. Everyone does. My winning personality and smile." she said flippantly.

"I'm being serious here Miss. She loved you."

"Loved to get me locked up in a mental institute more like!"

"That too." he agreed with another smile. Realising she would just keep evading the issue if he brought it up.

At the sight of his smile her heart didn't react this time. She was relieved. Went to her room. Danny stayed in the kitchen

Danny was worried. She frowned when he smiled then started to act all weird around him. Did she think it was too soon for him to be smiling? The fact that she thought he shouldn't be smiling had him worried. He couldn't help but smile around her. When she was near his mind was taken off his grief. Cheered him up to a degree. And now if she started thinking he was moving on too soon….he had never felt so confused before. No Missy would be glad he is smiling if that was true then what was up with her frown then? He shrugged. Danny your being paranoid just enjoy a visit from your wife's friend.

(X)

Missy was in her room. So everyone was ok. She had thought about them often back home Danny and the kids. Hoped they were coping ok. Danny especially. Alice had been his world. Alice had been right about one thing. She didn't understand the way Danny loved Alice. She had never been in love like that before and had never had that type of devotion gushed over her. It would drive her mental to be honest. What the hell had happened at the dining table? Her heart had stopped in her chest. When he smiled. His mouth curled up. His eyes went soft and her heart stopped. Oh my god.

Then coincidence Miss that's all. You might have a heart problem.

That you developed on the spot yeah right Miss.

C'mon this is Danny Alice's Danny! She argued with herself. You rip the mick out of him. You love him as a friend. You don't have any other feelings about him. Of course not. It would be betraying her best friend. He'd be horrified. She was horrified. He was still deeply deeply in love with Alice and always would be. Which was exactly fine and exactly the way it should be! Missy thought.

Satisfied with her own logic and how she calmed her self down rationally she smiled. She wasn't entirely satisfied with her explanation for her hearts little glitch. Nothing Missy keep repeating it. It was nothing!

**A/N any1 startin 2 wonder if shauna was right?**


	9. Visitors

3 men walked up to Leopards Den. Missy was playing barbies on the veranda with Amie.

"Well Ken is silly barbie. We both know pink is the bestest colour. You don't need a man. Your too good for him girlfriend." she said in a American accent. Waving her barbie about. Enjoying playing with them a little too much. She was supposed to be 40 years old.

Amie giggled.

"Your silly aunt Missy. But your good at barbies."

"I'm the best at barbies!" she told her.

Missy saw the men approaching. She was worried.

"Ames go in the house sweetie. In your room ok."

Amie looked at the men.

"But…"

"Do it!" she said sternly. "I'll be ok." she whispered. Promising.

She then glanced at the men. Christ if they started she was dead!

Amie walked inside. Missy stood up. Closed the front door. Braced her hands on the decking. Leaned forward. Pasted a cocky look on her face. "Hello."

"Hello." they replied. "We're looking for a man."

"That is vague." she told them. "If you really want a man there are other places. Sorry I can't have that here. I have kids in the house!"

Their eyes narrowed.

O yeah Miss provoke them. Just what you want to be provoking 3 large muscular men when your alone in the house with a 7 year old girl!

"You got a name for this man?"

"Yeah Ethan."

She relaxed. "Ethan doesn't live here actually. I would go and telephone him but I have kids to think about and I don't know you from Adam!"

"We're perfectly harmless." One of the men assured her. He was smiling at her.

"Sorry I can't take that chance. So you gonna come back later?"

"Missy?" Danny asked. Coming from around the corner. "You ok?"

"I'm good Danny."

He eyes the men suspiciously.

"They want Ethan." she supplied.

"He's at his own place."

"I thought it best not to tell them where he lived. In case you know…"

He nodded.

"I'll stay you go ring him yeah?" he asked her.

She nodded and walked into the house.

"Ok I recognise you. But not the other two." Danny said pointing to the burly one.

"It's ok sir. We're from Glen Afric fire service. We need to talk to Ethan."

"Why?" Danny asked.

"We have a proposition for him." the burly one said.

"He's coming." Missy said walking out.

She sat on her chair. On the veranda. "Won't be long."

Danny sat beside her. "You ok?" he murmured.

"Got abit of a fright when I saw them there. I was like oh my god if they start I'm dead. I told Amie to go inside in her room. She wanted to stay. She's a cracker."

He nodded.

One of the men stood at the bottom of the stairs.

"Just so you know I'm not gay."

Missy laughed. "Ok."

"What's your name then?"

She lifted her eyebrows.

"Sorry I got told not to talk to strangers. Especially strange men."

"I'm a good guy honest." he assured her.

"I'm Melissa. Missy to my friends."

Well Missy he said." then winked. Went in his pockets. "Damn!" he said.

"What?" she asked and stood up. Walked towards him

He smiled at her. "I lost my number. Can I have yours?"

Missy laughed. It was a genuine full bodied laugh. Danny felt an unnamed sensation that felt an awful lot like jealousy.

"Nice try Romeo." she said.

Danny smiled.

"Can I try again? I bet I convince you!" he said cockily.

"C'mon!" Missy said.

"I bet." he said stubbornly.

"Fine." she relented.

"A week has 7 days. How many do you have for me?"

She laughed again. "I'm still not convinced."

"Ok last try. Scouts honour."

"You were probably the scout who led all the brownies astray were you?"

He winked. Then said. "Can you lend me some of your beautiful potion?"

This was annoying Danny no end. He stood up. His eyes glittered angrily.

"Your ok. Thanks for the compliment anyway." she told the amorous fireman.

"O I didn't know you were together. Sorry."

"Oh no!" Danny and Missy said together. "We're not!"

"So c'mon. one date!" he pressed.

"I live in Glasgow."

"A mere formality." he said confidently.

"Are you gonna hound me forever?"

"I'm like a dog with a bone, tenacious!"

"So now I'm a bone? Nice compliment!"

"O your no bone, far too beautiful to be a bone."

"I go home tomorrow, as much as this offer is tempting and it really is!" she said in mock seriousness.

He grinned. "Ok then. But be careful though!"

"Aboout what?" she questioned.

"O it's your smile. It's so beautiful I almost fainted. So be careful you don't kill anyone with it!"

He walked away throwing her one last smile. She smiled back and he mock tripped. "See!"

She went back to sit next to Danny shaking her head. She was still smiling. "God can you believe that?" she whispered laughter in her tone. "He was so cheesy!"

Danny was uptight. "I'm sorry I should have sorted him. Got rid of him." he was foaming.

"Why? He was funny. It was just a laugh." she said happily. Her smile wide.

Danny crossed his arms. Unknowing of what had made him moody. He just knew that he did. He looked in the opposite direction to her brooding. Then he looked at her and noticed that the fireman was right!

Missy was nervous. Danny was studying her face intently. "What do I have something in my hair or am I sprouting 2 heads?" she asked laughing.

"No, he was right though. You do have a nice smile."

Her face froze.

"I never noticed before but you do." he murmured to himself more than to her.

He was frowning. Unknowing of what to make of that sentence. She had no idea what to say. She decided on humour.

"Oh my God Danny are you hitting on me?" she declared playfully.

He smiled. "Oh you wish!"

"Of course I do. It's all I dream about!" she said seriously. Put a hand on her forehead and leaned back dramatically. "O I wish Danny would hit on me today! If he does how will I resist him?" she said in a dreamy voice. Looked at him and rolled her eyes.

His eyes changed. Open his mouth to reoly but he was saved from his reply by Ethan shouting a greeting.

"Hello son."

"Hey Eth."

"Miss."

"Is Lex in?" she asked.

"Yeah I'll take you over as soon as I've spoke to them."

"Thanks it was nice talking to you Danny." she said and walked away.

**A/N ooo wot was Danny gonna reply? Of course I know coz I'm the author but wot do you guys fink hmmm?**

**Danny is starting to notice Missy as a woman instead of a friend. The hug before. Now she has a nice smile. She's only here for a day tho. U cn relax. a lot can happen in a day tho muhahahahaha**


	10. Tell Him!

"Ok I'm listening." Ethan said to the men waiting.

"Well. We are gonna strike to get rid of Tapas. BUT we need a leader. None of us can!" the burly on said.

"Which is where you come in!"

"Look can you tell me your names please?"

"I'm Jamal." the burly one said.

"And I'm Zuri." the quiet one volunteered.

"And I am Ata." the one who had been talking to Missy said.

"Look, I am sorry to burst your bubble but I'm not qualified to run a fire department. I am qualified in terms of being a firefighter but that is all. Operating equipment safely I mean I ONLY have 5 years field experience in New Zealand!"

"That is where we come in. We can help you. Sort stuff for you. Help you settle in quickly. Look we need someone who has experience of delegating. Has seen it in action. You saw how rubbish Tapas is." Ata told him.

Ethan thought. "I'll work you harder. Bring in stringent measures." he warned.

They nodded.

"And the one person who doesn't follow them is out. I have no qualms about you coming to talk to me about if you think something is wrong, but you come see me about it you don't just say no."

They nodded.

"And I think Tapas should have his chance. If he agrees to change and get stuff sorted I refuse to take over. That isn't me ok! I don't go behind people backs like that!"

They nodded but disliked that stipulation.

"Right final warning time if I do come in there will be emergency drills for no reason. Fund raising. Trying to get more firefighters in there working for us which means open days and going through the town and stuff. And I want every one of you formally trained. I'll try and get partial funding for that at least!"

"We like you already." Jamal said.

"You won't. When I'm dragging you our of bed at 2:30 for a drill. If I am your leader I will lead and delegate. It won't mean I'll be your friend at work. I want to be every one of your friends don't get me wrong but our first responsibility is the people we help. So that means when I tell you to jump at work you ask me how high and if you don't you can leave." he said seriously. "But of course if I tell you to jump outside of work you can slap me in the mouth" he smiled trying to show them he's approachable.

"Ok. That's fair." they agreed.

"So. What did you plan on doing with Tapas? God it feels like treachery"

"Well we were threaten to walk out unless he lets you join and resigns. Then you can go above him in Jo'burg and get rid of him."

Ethan nodded.

"No, he needs a chance to change. I don't want him sacked or resigning. That's too far!"

They nodded.

"You lot better be sure about this. I'm not as lax as him. I'll kick your asses into shape. No messing no games!"

They nodded.

"Good. I'll be at the station 9:00 on Saturday morning if he decides he can't or won't change. Circulate a memo ok!"

"What about tomorrow?"

"I'll be around tomorrow." Ethan said seriously. "But Saturday I wanna meet everyone, handing out tasks."

They looked dubious.

"You want me this is what I do!"

The 3 men left. Ethan started thinking about how to convince Tapas to buck his ideas up. He didn't want the team leader job. It was too political. Having to deal with beauocratic idiots who has never fought a fire in their life and yet expected them to deal with it on little money and inadequate protection. Throw them in front a fire and see how they liked it!

He looked up towards the house. Danny looked pissed. Then he turned pensive. Missy walked out onto the veranda. Danny looked at her. His eyes soft.

Ethan's jaw dropped.

"No way! He wouldn't…couldn't!" he whispered.

Missy seemed oblivious to the look on Danny's face. She looked normal. This was a crush on Danny's side right? I mean Missy is Alice's best friend! Missy supported him and he thought he had feelings that had to be it! Didn't mean he had deeper feelings for her. Just a crush.

"Miss I'm heading home!" Ethan said.

He watched as Danny watched he walk down the stairs. A confused expression on his face. O great this just takes the cake. He didn't even know he had feelings. Or that they were growing. And when he realised the vets equipment was gonna hit the fan!

Missy skipped down the stairs. "Ok Eee Bee lets go."

"O God Miss don't start with the annoying nicknames you think are hilarious. Please."

"Aww Eee Bee I know you love it!"

Fuck off. He mouthed.

"I'll tell Lexi your picking on me. She'll kick your ass!"

They climbed in the truck. "I'm shaking." he said smiling.

"You should be I'm scared and she'll be kicking you all over not me!" she laughed softly in the truck. "I'm so hilarious. I crack my self up."

"Impossible you were already cracked!" he told her.

Ethan decided to talk to her.

"How is Danny coping. Without Alice I mean."

Missy exhaled. "He misses her. I try to help him."

He nodded. By her words it sounded like Danny's 'crush' was one sided.

"Do you think he'll ever fall for someone else?" he asked.

"Honestly, I don't think so. I can't see it happening. He talks about her with so much longing. I don't think he wants to move on. He likes having her close. He loves her too much to even think about loving anyone else. If I'm being honest."

He nodded. She was right. What was he thinking. Danny fall for Missy? Ridiculous.

"How's Zoey?"

He smiled as they talked about his favourite subject. "She's just turned one. She's amazing. She heard the pride in his tone.

"You're a good father Ethan."

"Thanks. You should have kids you'll be a good mum."

"God no!" she laughed. "I love my sleep too much!"

He laughed.

"When I tell people I don't have kids they get this funny sympathetic look on their faces. Like they pity me. Like coz I don't have kids my life isn't full. I must admit being around Zoey does make me feel a little broody but your taken." she joked.

"I'd make an exception just for you Miss." he retorted.

"oooo you turn a girls head." she laughed. "I can see why Lex fell for you."

"oooo you turn a mans head!" he replied

"You're a good kid Ethan but that's what you are a kid, compared to me that is. I remember you at 12 years old."

"I had the biggest crush on you back then!" he admitted.

"O we knew." Missy told him.

"You KNEW?" he groaned.

"Yeah poor Alice. Was worried in case you for want of a better term made a move. Not like in a weird way or anything." she laughed.

The car stopped outside his house. "For the record I think you have excellent taste I'm so hot I almost fancy myself but that would make me gay so….no." she smiled widely showing him she was carrying on.

"You are mad!" he declared.

She ruffled his hair. "You just realised?"

"Hey Ethan." Lexi shouted.

"Duty calls. Zoey will only go down for me recently." he said smiling.

"I'll send her out. Or you can come inside."

"Na the nights warm. It's nice seeing you Ethan."

"You too Miss."

She heard soft voices then footsteps.

"Missy?" came a voice.

"You shouted" Missy replied when Lexi appeared.

"When did you get here?" Lexi asked hugging her.

"I was seeing a client in Jo'burg. So I popped in."

"It's good seeing you." Lexi told her.

"You too. You look better."

Lexi shrugged. "I still miss my mum."

"Lex you'll miss her everyday. I miss my mum and she's been gone 10 years. But learn to listen and you'll hear her."

Lexi nodded.

"You should put him out of his misery!" Missy said seriously.

"What? Ethan?"

"Yeah. Tell him you love him."

"Missy."

"If you don't I will!" Missy told her playfully.

Lexi looked at her. "Ok your right. He's too young and it'd be weird! Lex he loves you. Really loves you. And your so good together and you have Zoey."

"Exactly we have Zoey. I don't want her head getting messed up by parents who argue and scream at each other."

"You've both grew up so much this past year. I bet you could make it work. Anyway I'm only here for a quick visit but if it's ok with your dad I might be able to come over for a holiday in a few weeks time."

Lexi smiled.

Missy checked her watch and stood up. "Remember my warning I'll take him. He's cute!"

Lexi smiled.

"I feel like I just got here. But I got a early flight. I think! Can I borrow your Moped?"

"It's fine Miss." missy hugged her tight.

"Get yourself back down here soonish Missy!" Lexi told her.

"Ok I will. I'm on orders."

Missy retrieved the mo-ped and climbed on it. Saluted then sped off.

Lexi waked in the house. Ethan was walking from their daughters room.

"Miss gone already?"

"Yeah early flight. She advised me to do something."

"What dye your hair pink?" he chuckled.

"No." she walked up to him and planted her lips on his. He froze then pulled her up close to him. Kissed her back.

"Ethan I love you. I wanna be with you always. I wanna try again. Can we?"

"What if we mess up?" he asked his forehead rested against hers.

"We won't. I love you too much we'll sort this. Take it really slowly."

He nodded.

"I think that is the best idea you have ever had. And Lexi I love you too. Desperately."

(X)

Missy climbed off Lexi's mo-ped. Stifled a yawn. She'd had a 2am flight to get here for 2 pm. She had no sleep on the flight. No sleep before the flight. 36 hours she'd been awake and she was starting to feel it. She walked up the veranda wearily. Someone was in the shower. She saw the light under the door. She couldn't go to bed without a shower. She sat and looked at the stars. They looked bigger here. Brighter. Like she could reach up and grab one and put it in her pocket. Her eyes closed of their own accord cutting off her musings. She was soon back at home with Karl. She smiled.

**A/N lex and eth on again off again r on again oh well. and ethan thinks danny is attracted to miss. but is he?**


	11. Unbelievable

Danny finished his shower. Went into his room and sat on his bed. He liked it when Miss was here. She should have been back from her visit to Lexi's now. It was getting late. He didn't want anything happening to her. He flopped back on his head and covered his face. She was only a friend and all he did was panic and worry when she wasn't here. Then again you worry about your friends don't you?" he closed his eyes for a moment and felt weariness flood through him. He opened his eyes and sat up. Pulled on some sweat pants and walked out onto the veranda and he looked. Saw her curled up onto a chair. Her head pillowed on one arm. Her blond hair cascading over her shoulders. Her legs under her knees. She looked so young like that!

"Miss c'mon wake up." he said.

She didn't hear him.

He nudged her shoulder. She grabbed his arm. Hugged it. "Karl." she murmured dreamily.

He had to get her off his arm. The tingles he was feeling weren't normal. He pulled his arm away her face changed. she was frowning.

"No. No go away!"

Her body twitched and she curled inside tighter.

"Don't get away Andy!" tears leaked from her eyes.

He kneeled down. "Missy Missy wake up. Your ok!" he said softly and shook her. Her eyes flew open and she looked around disorientated.

"Your ok Miss. Your safe." he told her.

She looked at him. Eyes still heavy dusted with sleep.

Frowned at him. "I know Danny," it seemed her dream had already been forgotten.

"Go to bed Missy," he coaxed.

"Shower," she said and stretched.

"Bed, your shattered. If you fall asleep in the shower there is no one to get you out remember!"

"O yeah." she smiled. "That would be awkward."

He smiled back. "Yeah." he agreed.

They stood up. She kissed his cheek. "Night Danny."

She hadn't even noticed she kissed him. He did. What worried him was for an instant, for a second he wanted to turn his head and catch her lips with his own. The urge had almost overwhelmed him. God he was seriously losing her mind. He wanted to kiss Melissa. Missy for gods sake his wife had only been gone for 6 months and he was already thinking about kissing someone else. His wife's best friend to boot. This was crazy. He went to bed but he was full of self disgust that sleep was a long time coming.

(X)

Missy hummed in the shower. She had feel asleep on the veranda and woke up completely random clothes in bed. With no memory of in between. No doubt Danny had woke her up. And she had probably drooled on him or something. God! She wrapped a towel around her hair and pulled her dressing gown on. Walked into Danny as she walked out of the bathroom. She smiled.

"Hey Danny." she said happily.

"Hello." he said curtly. Walked passed her into the bathroom and closed the door.

She frowned. Right what had she done last night?

Went into her room. Pulled on shorts and a t-shirt. Brushed the tangles out of her hair and put it in a twist. Walked into the kitchen. It was 6:30. The kids were still asleep, good!

Danny was stood in the kitchen too. His back to her as he stood at the coffee maker. He had saw her when she walked in but didn't say a word to her. He almost dismissed her. That hurt! I mean fair enough she was Alice's friend but she had thought that they were beginning to be friends too!

"You ok Danny?"

He nodded stiffly. Manners dictated he answer her.

"Did I do something to offend you last night."

"No." not the reply she'd been expecting.

"Does this have something to do with me. The way your acting I mean?" she asked.

He was quiet. "No." he finally said.

"Oh God it does. That silence said it all. What did I do? Tell me what I did that offended you!" she panicked.

"Miss you didn't offend me!" far from it. "Whose Andy?"

She paled. "No…nobody." she stuttered.

He frowned.

"Did I mention a Andy?"

He nodded. "You were really distressed too! What did he do…."

"I gotta go pack!" she left the kitchen in a hurry. God she had mentioned Andy. Her uncle. No wonder he no wonder he didn't like her anymore. She hated that part of herself too. It disgusted her. God knows what kind of crap she'd been shouting! She put the few things she got out of her bag earlier back inside jerkily.

"Miss you ok?" he asked through her door.

She refused to cry! She refused to cry! That was her mantra. Tears blurred her vision. She couldn't think of that time ever! It depressed her and she always cried. Memories assaulted her. His face close to hers. Oh god no!

Missy never saw Danny walk into her room. Her back was to her door. He walked towards her slowly. "Oh no go away!" she whispered to the memories.

"Miss you ok?" he put his hand on her shoulder.

She spun quickly batting his hand away. "Don't touch me!" she said venomously. Her brown eyes were almost black with hatred. Her face contorted with anger.

He took a step back. Her face calmed. She exhaled. "I'm sorry Danny I didn't mean… can you leave me alone please?"

"Is that best? I mean something is obviously upsetting you!"

Wow. He picked up on something Karl never had.

"I'm a good listener. You can tell me Miss."

She shook her head. "No only me Alice and Shauna know about this. No offence but I'm not telling you!"

"Fair enough." he replied.

"What did I say last night?"

"You mumbled about Karl. Pass me the sick bag."

She smiled at him.

"Then you went really still. Then twitched saying no. Get off. Stop. Stuff like that. I woke you up. You were crying. It was awful seeing you cry. I've never seen you cry before. Well except…"

She wrapped her arms around herself.

"You ok?" he asked.

She nodded stiffly.

He shook his head. Walked over to her and hugged her softly.

She stood there frozen for a minute then she wrapped her arms around his waist.

"Thank you." she whispered.

He really should let her go but she felt good in his arms. She fit him really well. His mind blanked he was soon thinking about how soft her lips had felt against his cheek the air was suddenly charged with emotion. She pulled back and looked at him. He looked at her. He leaned down slightly and kissed her. Once butterfly soft. She pulled away slightly he leaned in and kissed her again. It turned incredibly hot incredibly fast. They were wrapped up in each other.

"Melissa." he breathed.

His eyes shot open and he sat upright in bed. Breathing hard. His heart beating fast. The way he was breathing and the way his heart was pounding he would of swore he had actually kissed her. But no it was only a dream. He collapsed backwards on his bed. Oh My God. He dreamed he kissed Melissa. And he knew if he hadn't woke up there it would have turned into more than a kiss he knew the way he kissed her it wouldn't have stopped. He put his hands on his face. God the way his heart was pounding that could have been real it refused to slow. He had to face some facts here. He was attracted to his wife's best friend. That was normal. I mean Melissa is gorgeous. And he is a man. And as much as he wished he had he hadn't died with his wife. His heart had died with her but you don't need your heart to be attracted to someone do you? Not that any of this matters coz nothing would ever happen between them! God she would be horrified at what they nearly did in his dream in the room she slept in. in the very bed she was lying in right now! He'd act normal around her. This is just a stupid chemical reaction in his body when he was near to a beautiful woman. A crush. God though that dream. His sheets were almost scorched with the heat he had generated. With how hot he felt. God this was just wrong!

"I'm so sorry Alice!" he told her.

(X)

Missy was in the kitchen in a jumper and jeans.

"Those clothes are a little warm for our climate." he said walking in.

"I'm heading back to Glasgow to freeze to death! Karl wil have to warm me up!"

"ok." he said. Good danny this is normal. Act normal!

"Do you mind if head over in a months time say? For a proper holiday?"

Oh god no! "That's fine." he said forcing a smile. It was strained. "Your welcome anytime."

"My taxi is here soon. Give the kids a kiss for me yeah?"

"I will." he told her.

They heard a beep.

"I'll see you soon then." she tried to pull the handle up on her case.

"Stupid freaking sticky handle. Flipping idiot c'mon!" she told it. She pulled it hard and it gave. "Ha ha I win!" she laughed.

He smiled. "Does insulting it always work?"

"Pretty much." she looked at his soft green eyes.

"You should smile more. It brings out your eyes. She then blushed like she had said too much.

"I'll try." she patted his arm and left the house. He followed her.

"Bye Miss." he waved at her. She waved back. The car pulled away. The house was quiet. it felt empty. He missed her already.

**A/N so this attraction isn't one sided. poor danny beating himself up :(**


	12. A Full 2 Days

Ethan walked into the fire department the next morning. He planned to make some notes last night but he and Lexi got….sidetracked. God he loved her so much. And they were gonna be fine. He knew it. But they needed slow and easy. He could do slow. They had forever so they had no reason to rush. Poor Liv wouldn't be getting a playmate for Thabo Junior though. That constituted rushing. He had stayed in the master bedroom last night but tonight he was going back to his own room. For now. If she asked him to move in he wasn't sure if he could refuse her. Life was too short for all the old arguments and crap. He was forgetting all the old stuff and starting fresh with her.

Tapas was in his office. Ethan knocked, out of courtesy not respect. He didn't wait for an invitation just walked right in.

"You again? Do I have to phone the police again?"

"No. I'm here for a job." Ethan said simply.

"I'm not hiring you!" Tapas said angrily.

"O I think you are. See I have it on good authority that if you don't hire me then all 7 of your men will strike!"

Tapas glared.

"You might as well hire me. I know what I'm doing. I'm good at what I do!" Ethan assured him.

"And cocky and sure of yourself. That could get someone else killed!" Tapas told him.

"You've got a cheek talking about people getting killed with the crap you call PPE!"

The man frowned.

"God tell me you know what PPE means!"

"I know!" Tapas said insulted.

"I'm waiting." Ethan replied. Crossed his arms.

"Er." he stuttered.

"Personal Protective Equipment" Ethan supplied in disgust. "Either way hire me or not I'm gonna have this job and not coz I want it. God it is the last thing I want but I can't stand by and watch fireman and civilians die coz your too proud to admit that your out of your depth. You don't have the first clue how to do this job do you?"

"Yes I do!" Tapas yelled. "And get out of here I'm not hiring!"

"Then your men strike simple as. Tell you what hire me and I can help you. You stay in charge and I'll tell you suggestions."

Tapas mulled over his options.

"But be warned Tapas. Change needs to be made here. Coz I refuse to work here the way it is. It's too dangerous and I have a baby daughter at home. I won't risk my life with rubbish equipment when I have her to think about." Ethan told him.

"Fine your hired. I'll sort you a contract."

They shook hands. Ethan sat down.

"Right what funding do you have?" Ethan asked.

"None."

"At all?" Ethan asked incredulous.

He shook his head. Ethan frowned.

"We get a small subsidy off the government."

"How small?" Ethan asked.

"Barely enough to cover the heating and electricity and rent for here. Maintenance of the engines is covered by our sister unit in Jo'burg."

Ethan nodded.

"First thing we apply for funding from every agency we can find. Doesn't hurt to apply. They can only say no. Erm…we can get in touch we other fire departments and beg for their surplus equipment they don't need or use for the time being. We need to organise fund raisers and maybe an open day. Get some young men and woman in here. Show them the close knit family unit you have in a fire fighting community, you need to get the men sorting this place out though. Starting with our engines."

A bell rang.

"That's our cue." Tapas said. Running grabbing equipment. Ethan went too. Grabbed a helmet and jacket.

(X)

A small house fire. They walked in. Chip pan was on fire. Ethan found the fuse box and turned the electric off. Another man ushered the family outside. The fire was soon doused.

"Is that all we deal with?" Ethan asked when they got back to the station

"Pretty much." Tapas answered.

"Then you Tapas are lucky. Coz that was freaking shoddy. I didn't hear your voice once! Delegate to them. Coz when a big fire comes and eventually it will if your not talking to them telling them what to do then people are gonna die."

"We agree!" the men said. Putting their equipment away.

"O so your mutinying on me?"

"It's nothing personal." Jamal told him. "Ethan knows what he's doing!"

"Tapas has been here 40 years. He knows what he's doing!" Toby told them. Toby was Tapas second.

"You be quiet Toby coz I didn't hear your voice either!" Cam told him.

"What was your job in the house today Toby?" Ethan asked .

Toby was silent.

"Exactly. You didn't know coz he didn't tell you!"

"We'll vote." Tapas suggested.

"Who votes to keep Tapas?" Toby raised his hand.

"And Ethan?" the 4 men raised their hands.

"So this is how it is?" Tapas asked.

They nodded.

"Fine!" Tapas walked away.

Ethan took off his jacket. Rolled up his sleeves on his black jumper. Grabbed a clipboard and a pen.

"Right Cam, Jamal and Zuri. Hot water and soap. I want the engines cleaned!"

"Ata and Toma I want a maintenance check on every piece of equipment. Bring it to me as soon as your done. Toby come with me."

Ethan walked through the building checking everything. God this was gonna be a long day!"

(X)

Ethan feet shuffled into the house at 11 o'clock that night. He was filthy, tired but happy some progress had been made. He had a list as long as his arm they need essentially. Spare stuff that they needed immediately. But his engines were sparkling and he's spent the last 4 hours mending things that were broken on them. Hence the dirt and grime. Stuff they would have needed in an emergency hadn't worked. But his engines were full operational now.

Lexi saw him. "Hey honey." he said.

"Hello handsome."

He stifled a yawn.

"Your late," she said softly.

"I've been getting my fire fighters into touch. They appointed me as their leader. Not that I want to that is!" he said sadly.

They sat in the kitchen she put her arms around him from behind. Kissed his cheek.

"Lex I'm hacky honey."

"I don't care I wanna kiss."

He stood up. She walked into his arms and he kissed her thoroughly.

"Wow." she said when she came up for air.

He smiled. "Wow times ten."

He rubbed her nose with his. "How was Zoey?

"Shouted for dada at bath time and bedtime. You man her ducks better than me. I listen to you at bathtime and you have me laughing with the splashing and funny duck voices."

"This is why I didn't want the job. This could be like this for weeks I'm missing her already. I haven't seen her all day!" he sounded so dejected.

"It'll only be for a little while, till it's sorted."

He rested his forehead on hers. "I love you." he stroked a finger down her cheek.

"I love you too." she replied.

"How was work today?" he asked.

"Work." she grumbled.

"Honey."

"It's just been one of those days. A druggy started and an old man wouldn't let me treat him coz I was a woman. And martin is starting again."

"Again?" Ethan asked.

"Well he cornered me and made suggestions at me."

Ethan's face went hard.

"It's ok honey I put in a complaint against him for sexual harassment. I'm sick of his wandering hands too!" she cursed her loose tongue.

"O I'm gonna kill him." he fumed.

"Don't worry honey. He was suspended straight away. Bob is backing me up too!"

He still looked angry. She kissed him softly. "Go shower and come to bed yeah."

He nodded and kissed her once more. Then he went to shower.

(X)

Ethan was up and out of the house for 4 the following morning. He kissed a still sleeping Lexi and Zoey then left. Snuck into the fire station. Set off the alarm. Waited with a stop watch. As more seconds passed he grew angrier. They were pulling on their gear then climbing in the truck.

"Where's Toby?" someone shouted.

"Here!" he replied.

Ethan stood illuminated by the engines lights.

"It took you 3 minutes 36 seconds. The building is burning down as we speak. Or someone has fell to their death. Couldn't hold on any longer. Do you realise the implications of what I'm saying. People die the longer it takes us! You grab your gear and dress in the engine that as a practice was freaking rubbish. Someone could be dead by now! I want 90 seconds 2 minutes tops!"

They nodded.

"Right Zuri, Ava and Jamal outside for hose work."

"Cam and Malik I want you to give that bell a going over. It sounds ill. Give it a dose of caffeine if you need to!"

God he was being harsh today. "Hop to it!" he said. Everyone got to work.

He put a cleaning rota on the board. As well as a maintenance sheet. He tacked up a sheet of paper asking people to write down what qualifications they had and the year they ran out. So he could send them in for appropriate ones. He walked into his office and turned on the laptop and dongle he bought. Looked on the internet for funding for this place. He looked for neighbouring fire stations. Another long day lay ahead.

(X)

At 6 o'clock that evening he walked into the fire station with a bag. He went to the bunks.

"Hey guys I've been a bit of a prick today and usually I'd say we could go for a drink but since we're on back shift and that's' kinda impossible I got us cans of soda and cakes. Truce?"

"You don't have to boss."

"I know but I was in a mood this morning and took it out on you guys."

"well ok then." Jamal said. Cam jumped up and grabbed the bag.

**9 am the next morning.**

Ethan and all his people were being given the day off. He had firefighters covering for them from neighbouring stations. He had left a list of what he needed completed they had a load of stuff arriving from number of different stations too it was old but significantly better then what they were using in the past. He yawned and walked into his house. They had 3 call outs last might. Fairly busy for them actually he was told. He heard Zoey's giggle. It brought a smile to his face. His house had the same layout as leopards den. It was just smaller.

"O Zoey." he said. "Where is my Zo zo?"

He walked into the living room and climbed over the safety gate. Lexi smiled at him. She was crawling around the floor. She crawled to the sofa pulled herself up to standing and held her arms out to him.

"da da." she chortled. Then lost her balance and landed on her bum. Exhaled in exasperation. She acted like an old woman sometimes. Lexi was still smiling at their daughter. He walked over and picked Zoey up who giggled when he blew raspberries on her cheek.

"Rough night honey?" she asked.

"Couple of call out's." he put Zoey on his knee and bounced her.

"Go to bed Ethan."

"Nope. Gonna spend some quality time with my daughter."

"I thought you were working today so dad has her. He's looking forward to it."

"O is Zo Zo seeing granddad today?"

"Nanda." she said happily and clapped her hands.

"I'm sorry Ethan I can tell dad your home."

"S'kay he don't get to see her very often." he hugged her close and smelled his daughters scent. Talcum powder. Johnson's shampoo and his baby's own smell.

"Neither do you!" she retorted.

He shrugged. "Horsey horsey don't you stop. Just let your feet go clippety clop." his daughter enjoyed the music to go with the bouncing.

"Time to get my little lady dressed. Now what should Zoey wear today hmmm?" Ethan asked her. He walked into her bedroom carried her in one arm.

"You help daddy huh daddy's not too good at picking clothes"

Lexi was behind him. He pulled her close for a quick kiss. "You'd better be going to work. I'll see you after. Is there anything that needs done here?"

"Shelves in Zoey's room and a sticky cupboard in the kitchen."

"Sorted." he promised. "Tell Bob I said hi."

She nodded and smiled. "I knew there was a reason I loved you."

"Coz I'm good with a hammer?"

"Among other things."

**A/n ethan is a good firefighter i fink although he was abit moody 2day. aww he's a good daddy too. aww he's jst so cute lol**


	13. Going Insane

**A Month Later**

Danny was going insane! Off his nut. Really! He'd been fine till she'd phoned and asked if it was still ok to stay for 3 weeks. Yes Missy. AGAIN! God he was really losing it. He was sat on his veranda berating himself. As soon as she left his lovely dream of Alice had returned but then Melissa phones and he realises he is looking forward to seeing her a little too much! And don't even ask about his dreams about her. Which were growing in frequency and intensity. They went further and further every night! That annoyed him coz his dreams were his Alice land. Where he and Alice could be together for a few hours. And she was intruding! In such a wrong way not that she instigated anything in those dreams. He groaned. Did she have to come and turn his world upside down? Couldn't she just stay away? O yes Danny how do you explain that one? Sorry Miss I really don't want to se you Why? Coz I keep having these incredibly intense erotic and sensual dreams about you and they're driving me crazy! C'mon Danny this is Melissa. The Melissa who took the bed out of yours and Alice's honeymoon suite as a laugh.

He exhaled. He couldn't help it she was just so….well it sounded weird but she wasn't Alice. Not that Alice is better! But that mean Alice was worse than Missy either. She made him smile. Took his mind off his problems. And there wasn't any chance of him making a fool of himself and falling in love coz he didn't have a heart anymore. So all he had to do was be a man. Tough it out. Dreams were just dreams weren't they? Something your subconscious makes out of nothing! The thing which ate away at his soul was it had only been 7 months since Alice's death 7 MONTHS! So quickly. He still missed Alice. With every breathe he took. And he loved her with every beat of his heart he would give anything in the whole world to have her back but he knew she wasn't coming back. Ever! But Missy is coming. And he'd have to be nice to her. It wasn't her fault his imagination went into overdrive with her. The thing was he had never noticed how gorgeous she was before. O he knew she was pretty but he had never looked at her in a oh my god look at how stunning she is way before. He'd only ever had eyes for Alice. Now he saw her. Actually saw her! And wow! What a stunner! She had legs that went on forever. She was lean trim and athletic. She had a quick smile always on her mouth. Her brown eyes the shade of melted chocolate which you just wanted to fall into. She had blond hair soft, shoulder length. She was beautiful. Which again was weird coz he was only ever attracted to black hair and blue eyes. You couldn't get much opposite than that!

"God Alice honey I love you and I'm so sorry I am just the biggest prick alive. Your best friend. My thoughts just wander though. And when she's here she makes me forget how much I need you and miss you and I feel like I can smile again." he whispered.

He could have swore he heard. "Thank you Missy." on the wind in Alice's beautiful musical voice.

God he was just a proper letch! He was so disgusted with himself.

A car pulled up and Missy climbed out. She stood for a moment. Dressed in light blue jeans and a white jumper. Sunglasses perched on her head.

"What no hello Daniel?" she asked him playfully.

"Hello Daniel" he replied.

She made a face and grabbed her case and paid the driver. "God it's hot over here." she pulled off her jumper. "It's winter over in Glasgow."

"And it's summer over here! We have our winter in July."

"That us so wrong. Winter in July! I'm sorry I missed the kids birthdays but 3 weeks of me should make up for it!" she said cockily.

"So sure of yourself?" he asked.

"C'mon it's me! Admit it you all love me! I'm just so loveable. Admit it!" she repeated.

8 months ago he might of said it in jest but she was too close to an emotion there. And some unnamed feeling was building inside him that he wasn't sure of. But its' not love Danny you hear yourself!

"Wow you went awful serious a minute there. You ok?"

"Yeah Miss. Your loveable. You're a pain in the neck too like!"

"But Danny you love it." she said a sickly sweet voice.

"Fair enough I can tolerate you. But 3 weeks. I'll need to be sectioned." Literally he was not gonna survive.

"I know the truth don't worry. Your secret is safe with me!" she walked inside and he paled. Did she know? She couldn't! if she did she'd be disgusted at him. She'd leave. She'd think he was weird. No she couldn't know. He'd never told her. And she never would know. Somehow Alice's best friend was his best friend now too. No Missy was playing. The usual banter they usually shared. That was something else he never noticed before. The banter is was practically flirting sometimes! Had Alice picked up on that? Or was this a new thing? Oh god his head hurt and he was worried. He didn't wanna lose Missy as a friend. She's a really good friend. They shared stuff in common. They both loved Alice and had similar taste in music. Then again they differed in many ways too. Like she couldn't go near his surgery. She hated the sight of blood and guts. It made her faint. and the smell of antiseptic knocked her sick. They were opposites when it came to TV programs too. And she matched his temper perfectly which wasn't a good thing coz if they ever argued world war 3 would break out. that's why he was probably attracted to her. Coz she was so different to what he was used to. He'd been in love with one woman for the whole of his adult life. And now he was attracted to the nearest woman available and unfortunately it was Missy.

"You wanna cuppa Danny?" she asked popped her out of the door and smiled at him. His brain melted. Oh god he was a goner!

"Sure Miss." he said when he remembered how to talk.

He followed her inside the house slowly.

**A/N awww poor danny he really is beating himself up. aww he really dnt want this 2 happen but i am a great believer in u cnt help who u love :/**


	14. More Help

Ethan was talking on his mobile to Thabo.

"Please mate I need some men!" Ethan pleaded

"Eth, that sounds so wrong!"

"I'll pay you!"

"Um….no. have you any idea what you asked me to do. You offered to pay for my body. I'm worried about you mate!"

"I'll give you my first born son!" he offered.

"I don't want him!"

"Unlimited babysitting duties for the first 6 months."

"Make it a year and I'll talk to Liv." he negotiated.

"You're a hard man Thabo!"

"Hey Liv is pregnant and hormonal. If I agree to this madness she'll kill me and enjoy it. I like life. I'm sorry mate!"

"Can you give me the names of some of your single friends who are willing to do it for me?"

"Ethan this convo sounds so gay!" Thabo told him.

"Look I need men for my auction. I'm already anticipating Lexi's wrath coz I put my name down."

"O you are a brave man!" Thabo told him.

"Brave my ass. I haven't been home in 3 days!" Ethan laughed.

"Just make sure you have a head start on distance." Thabo advised.

"Ha ha Thabo. How is Liv by the way?"

"Lets put it this way, how in the hell am I gonna survive the next 6 months?"

Ethan laughed again. "It's worth it at the end mate."

"She scares me sometimes. I'm beginning to doubt my masculinity!"

Ethan laughed harder.

"Go on laugh Eth. It's true!"

"So will you text me those names?"

"Will do mate. And remember plenty of running distance!"

Ethan was laughing as he disconnected and wrote maybe beside Thabo's name. He was in his office. There were plenty of single men in the township. He was doing an auction at leopards den which means the men take the woman out on a date. It was part of a big fayre he had planned. It was to raise money for the fire station. The last month had been hectic. He had held an open day and had 6 new men and 2 new woman joining his team. That brought his quota of people up to 16. Some of his funding had came through so he was looking through catalogues with his men…oops with his engineers and getting their opinion on what he should buy. The young ones including him wanted all the gadgets and updated equipment which if he had the money he would buy in a second but he had monetary restraints.

Toby still hated him but that was life. As long as he listened and did as he was told Ethan couldn't care a less how he felt. His original men. The difference in them was astonishing. They were all being formally trained now so were being to feel more confident. He had encouraged Sid to give them a discount at the gym so they were all filling out and muscular too. Some of them were looking forward to his auction.

The majority of his equipment was updated. He had 20 jackets. 20 helmets and 20 sets of oxygen. So had a few spares. They were maintained after the firefighters after each usage. The engines were again checked after each time they were used and were thoroughly checked over once a week. On the spot drill were less frequent now but he liked to keep them on their toes. There would be hell to pay if they lapsed on their time of 83 seconds.

He had fixed up the station as best he could. Fixed the rickety beds. Painted there walls with donated paint. Bought in a old hot plate and microwave from Caroline. Set up an emergency button which they hit if they had an major emergency it sent a message to the neighbouring agency's. It had been a long hard month. All this had been around being a father to Zoey and actually going and doing his job as a therapist. He hadn't seen hide nor hair of Tapas which again didn't bother him. This place was safer more efficient and this people felt better about themselves. Happier firefighters more experienced firemen were better firemen! He had a fair few people now who were being adequately trained but he was still taking no chances.

He rang leopards den.

"Hey this is leopards Den. Missy speaking. No one else is here so can I take a message?"

"Hey Miss it's Ethan when did you get here?"

"Like you need an introduction. I'd know your voice anywhere Ethan. I've just arrived an hour ago. I was planning on surprising you in a saucy negligee!"

He laughed. "Oooo I look forward to it!"

"Na can't do it now. It won't be a surprise!"

"Damn! I'm actually calling to talk to Danny. I sorta need to ask a favour of him but I think I might come across as insensitive!"

"You wanna ask me? I could help!"

"Well I'm raising money for the fire station and I'm doing a men's auction."

"O." Missy said. "That is a tough one."

"It's just been 8 months you know and I'm worried in case he only says yes to help me then feels all upset and weird."

"I'll ask him if you want. We're pretty close and then I'll tell you if he can do it. He's more likely to tell me to go to hell than you."

"O would you Miss? You're an angel sent from God!"

"I've already agreed to do it Eth. Don't lay it on too thick. I'll change my mind!"

"Miss will you marry me?" he joked. "Your too good a catch to get away!"

"O of course I'll marry you!" she said in a fake happy ecstatic voice. Jumping up and down laughing.

She didn't see Danny walk from the house in anger.

"Right we're off to Vegas as soon as."

"VEGAS?" she shrieked. "Right the deals off!" she said laughing.

"My heart is broken!" he said dramatically. "Oh God I have lived with the Trevanion's too long if I'm acting like this. You did warn me insanity was contagious but I didn't listen now look at me!"

"More fun this way anyway." Missy said. "But I'll talk to Danny for you."

"Thanks Miss your great."

"I know." she replied and disconnected.

(X)

Danny stormed down into his surgery. Missy was getting married. And he was having weird completely wrong dreams about an engaged woman. God this Karl was an stupid idiotic jerk. Proposing over the phone. God that was crap! But she was happy and ecstatic. Her smile huge. Her eyes sparkling. God how could she get married? She never come to see him….his kids anymore. He'd….they'd miss her. God Danny quit lying to yourself. He had suspected his feelings were starting to run deeper than just friendship. This was tearing him apart! He had to stop this! He would never betray Alice and Missy god she was just be freaked out. Added to the fact that she would never betray Alice either. He still loved Alice more than anything else in the whole world. So if he ignored these feelings they would go away right? He could only hope they would!

Someone walked into his surgery. "Danny can we talk? You know outside?" Missy asked a hand covering her mouth.

He looked at her face and couldn't help but smile. All those problems he had about feelings just seemed to disintegrate when she was near.

"Sure." then he remembered the marriage proposal and decided to put some distance between them. So she walked beside him.

He could smell her perfume. It was light and breezy. Alice used to wear a flowery one which he loved. But this was nice too. It teased your senses.

"….huh Danny?"

He was pulled back to reality.

"What do you think? Are you ok with it?"

Ok shame time. Admit he wasn't listening he was smelling her perfume or agree to whatever she said. He took the latter.

"Yeah I am ok with….it."

Missy looked at him.

"You sure? I asked you coz you might feel obligated to him. I'm giving you an out!"

"No Miss. It's fine. Really." he hoped! "Did he tell you if…..anyone else was involved?" he asked hoping for a clue to what she was talking about.

She smiled. "You weren't listening were you?"

"Yes I was. I am seriously offended here Miss."

"What did you agree to?" she asked grinning.

He paused. "To prove I know I decline to answer. To show my solidarity with the idea."

"O yeah?" she asked.

"Yes."

"You know if patter was water you'd drown. **(*Pronounced as patta and wata* in Geordie land lol)**

"You've got room to talk!" he retorted.

They walked into the house. "Seriously Danny were you listening?"

"My mind did wander for a minute." he admitted.

"I knew it!" she laughed. "Look remember I'm giving you an out if you want it. Ethan is having a fayre here in a weeks time and he's having a men's auction." she smiled at Danny's puzzled frown. "It's where woman bid on men for a date. He wants to know if you'll be one of his eligible bachelors. He didn't know whether to ask you because of coming across as insensitive."

Danny frowned. "O I dunno Missy. I mean a date!"

"Technically not a real one." she supplied. "And you would be helping your son."

"A date?" he repeated.

"I'll tell him you can't. it's too soon." Patted his hand. "Don't worry about it."

"Could you do it? If Karl died?"

"Moot point. Me and Karl broke up." she told him.

"Really! I thought you were engaged." he blurted. Damn his loose tongue.

"Engaged?" she asked incredulous. "Where did you get that from?"

"Well I heard you say on the phone saying yes that you'd love to marry someone. You were happy excited. Jumping up and down so…."

"I knew I missed my calling as an actress. Me and Ethan were carrying on. C'mon me accept a phone proposal? That is so rubbish! I have standards!"

"And you and Karl?" he asked. Sat down on the veranda. As did she.

Me and Karl talked. Realised the love had fizzled out you know. We were only together out of habit. I love him but as a friend not a partner. I'm a little sad coz we were good together and had so much in common which is why we stayed together so long. But we weren't in love anymore."

Danny nodded.

"I wonder if there'll be any eligible bachelors at this auction?" she pondered and winked at him. "Missy is on the prowl. You may be seeing more of me in the future. I might see my future husband." she laughed.

"Will you tell Ethan I'll think about it? It is still early after Alice but just give me a little time."

"Danny it doesn't make you a bad person if you can't. We understand you love Alice deeply and your still grieving. It's a process. Took her years to get over you!" she said.

He felt uncomfortable. "I'd better be getting back to my kids."

She smiled. "I can start tea?" she suggested.

He raised his eyebrows. "Do I want a trip to the hospital tonight?"

She hit his arm. "Hey I've had lessons!"

"Do I want my stomach pumped tonight?"

"I'll get you for this Daniel. Mark my words!"

"I look forward to it!" then he winked with a playful grin.

**A/N just another little danny stressin chappie aww bless (PS) i sorta said i would put songs on the beginnings bt guess wot for the first time eva i ain't found any sods law lol :)**


	15. Hysteria

Missy stood staring at him as he left. Oh No. Oh no. Oh no. OH NO! this wasn't happening. This so wasn't happening! Alice would kill her! How could she? She was like the worst best friend on the face of the earth! In the entire world! She needed help! She left the veranda and walked towards the storage sheds. Made sure no one was around rang a familiar number. With every ring her panic grew. As did her realisation of those warm feelings. Thoughts jumped unwelcome into her mind. Oh god this wasn't going on!

Shauna picked up. "Hell…."

"Yes Shauna I'm in hell you have to help me! Please I'M IN HELL!" she repeated panicked pleading.

"Oh God Missy what's wrong?"

"You were right Shauns all those months ago. I think I'm falling for Danny!" she paced restlessly.

"Miss I told you to back off!" she said in sympathy.

"How do I stop this?" she asked panicking.

"Stop it? I dunno leave and never see him again maybe?"

"How do I explain that to him. I'm never seeing you again Danny. Why? Coz I'm falling for you. Isn't there something else? There has to be something else! God Alice planned this she did always have a funny sick sense of humour that included torturing me!" Missy was almost hysterical.

"Miss calm down!" Shauna said softly.

"Calm down! The woman tell's me to calm down! How in hell do I calm down? For the first time I'm actually falling for someone. Properly. Fully. And it's my best friends husband. This is like the worst thing ever! I'm getting fuzzy thoughts Shauna. Like happily ever after and kids with green eyes. KIDS Shauna!" she wailed.

Shauna would have laughed at her tone, if it hadn't been Danny.

"I gotta stop this Shauna you gotta help me!"

"Look Miss when someone falls this hard and this quick it's usually…"

"Don't say it! Don't you dare say it Shauna. I can't be stuck with this feeling indefinitely. I just can't!" she exhaled noisily. "I'm such a bad friend Shauna. How could I do this?"

The guilt in her tone was obvious and it tore at Shauna.

"Look Miss you didn't plan this. Don't beat yourself up."

"How can I not. I obviously didn't prevent it. She's our best friend and it's Danny!" the hysteria was rising again.

"That isn't what I'm worried about. I think Alice would be ok with you getting with Danny. She'd want you to be happy. The reason I was worried is coz he loves Alice and I don't want you getting hurt. He will always love her and when you share a love like that it's not something you get over quickly or easily. He is gonna hurt you Miss I can see it!"

"You think I'm gonna tell him? Are you out of your mind. He can't know! He'll never know. He'll never see me as a friend again. Look if I ignore this it'll go away right?" she asked.

"Missy."

"If you say no Shauna I'll kill you!" she warned.

"Yes Missy. it'll go away if you ignore it!" Shauna said robotically.

"Thank you Shauna."

"Miss I thought you and Karl were together."

"I broke up with him a few weeks ago coz I realised I wasn't in love with him. I didn't know why I didn't love him at the time. Why? Shauna I need an excuse to leave! Give me an excuse."

"Like?"

"Anything I just need to go!"

"What about work?" Shauna suggested.

"I left my blackberry at home. They have no way of getting in touch!"

"Family?"

"NO coz I'd feel guilty. Tempting fate you know!"

"Miss your not helping!"

"Your rubbish at this Shauna. Where's Alice when you need her!"

"Well Miss if Alice was here this wouldn't be happening!"

"Too freaking right it wouldn't. I can't believe it's happening now! Give me your honest opinion Shauna!"

"Well Miss my honest opinion? I think your done for! I'll phone you in a few days ok."

"Don't tell James please Shauna. This is hard enough!"

"It goes without saying Miss. It never crossed my mind!"

"And if you think of anything to stop this…" Missy said hopefully.

"I'll call you."

"Thanks Shauna."

She disconnected and held her head in her hands for what felt like an age. She heard Danny shouting. She looked up and realised it had grown dark. She looked at her watch. 8:30.

"Melissa!" Danny yelled. He had a torch.

She rose from her tree stump. Exhaled.

"I'm ok Danny!" she yelled.

He jogged round the corner and gathered her in his arms. She froze and pulled away. "I'm ok Danny."

"I was really worried. I haven't seen or heard from you since 3 o'clock. The kids are dying to see you."

"Ok." she put some distance between them.

"You ok Miss?"

"Yeah Danny I'm good." she said neutrally and flashed him a fake smile.

He frowned.

"You need to talk about something Miss?" he asked softly.

"I'm ok Danny. Really."

"Have I upset you?"

"How many times I'm fine!" she snapped and walked away.

God if this is what falling felt like she wanted it to stop right now! She hated it. Hated that she was falling for her best friends husband. God this is so shouldn't be happening. She couldn't take it anymore. When she saw him her heart started racing and her palms had started to sweat. She had to get out of here. This was wrong on so many levels! She was definitely going to hell. I mean falling for your best friends widow constituted as a sin right?

She walked into the house and shouted for the kids. Amie and Daniel came out and hugged her.

"Wow look at you both. Your both shot up since I last saw you. Your taller. Even you Ames." she walked them into the kitchen. "You two had supper yet?"

"Nope." Daniel said.

"I'll sort you something yeah." Missy told them.

"Auntie Missy will you French plait my hair for school tomorrow? Daddy can't do it and Lexi comes over too late." Amie asked.

"Will do Ames. I used to French plait your mums hair too when we were a little bigger than you." she went silent. The kids chatted. She made them a sandwich and gave them a glass of milk. Put some Oreos on a plate. "You can have them after your sandwiches. Crusts too."

Daniel rolled his eyes. She grinned.

"Did you really used to braid mum's hair?" Amie asked between bites.

"Yeah. She used to braid mine too. It was a lot longer then."

"Do you miss mum?" Daniel asked.

She sat opposite them. "Yeah I do. Loads. She was my best friend in the whole world. My sister too. Not my real sister like Amie is to you but like a spirit sister. We have the same spirit you know."

Amie scrunched her face in thought. Then nodded. "Like your really the same?" she asked.

"Sort of. Not the same but nearly. We liked the same stuff. And we loved each other like sisters."

Daniel nodded understanding. "We miss her too. We wanna talk about her but we're scared in case it makes dad sad. So we don't. We're scared in case we forget her!" Danny said gravely.

Amie nodded seriously.

"O you'll never forget your mum. She's here with you. And your dad will always talk about her with you. He wants you to."

"Won't it make him sad?" Amie asked.

"It might. But an ok kind of sad. You know sad she isn't here but he'll be happy that you are talking and sharing your memories with him. Memories are special things. See you can all share them and you'll have 3 times as many. Share and remember your happy times."

They were thoughtful as they ate their food.

"So it'll be ok to talk to him then?" Amie asked.

Missy looked at her. God she was her mother. Sometimes Missy looked at her and it was like being transported back to when she Shauna and Alice were kids and Alice was about to pull one of crazy stunts. Missy joining in and egging her on and Shauna in the corner shaking her head knowing something was gonna go wrong. It invariably did. It broke her heart sometimes but she was happy a little Alice was here.

"It'll be fine honestly. Why not ask him tomorrow?"

Amie nodded. Always the pragmatic thinker. No doubt planning.

"SO tell me how's school."

They both groaned. Danny walked in the kitchen. He looked at missy who looked at her coffee cup.

The kids were finished.

"Time for bed for school kids."

"But da-ad." they said together.

"No but." he said sternly.

Missy smiled at them. "Goodnight."

"Night." Daniel said. Walked to his room.

Amie came over and hugged her. "Can you stay forever?" she whispered.

"You got me for 3 weeks." Missy told her softly.

She nodded. "G'night Auntie Missy."

"Night sweetie." she replied.

Amie went in her room. The house was quiet. Missy stood up.

"Thank you for what you said to them. I didn't know they felt like that."

"It's ok Danny." she replied ready to make her escape to her room.

"I'm sorry if I pushed you earlier. You're a good friend to me and I don't want to I dunno fall out I suppose."

She covered her eyes with her hand. He walked towards her.

"Miss tell me what's wrong please. Maybe I can help you!"

"No one can help me!" she said sadly.

His stomach plummeted. He put his hand on her cheek. "Miss I'm worried about you. Are you ill?"

She uncovered her eyes and was looking into concerned green eyes. There gazes held and their breath caught. They were standing so close. His hand on her cheek was warm and soft.

"No I'm…fine." she whispered.

"You promise?" he asked huskily.

She could only manage a nod.

They moved their heads a fraction. Their eyes still held, their lips only an inch apart…..

**A/N *squeal* will they?**


	16. Anger

Their eyes still held, their lips only an inch apart when the telephone rang. Reality returned. They jumped apart. She blushed red. "Look I'm sorry. I…I…." she stuttered. "I gotta go!" she finally squeaked.

She bolted to her room and slammed the door.

The phone rang insistently. He picked it up.

"Dad it's Lex. I just wondered if you found Miss. I've been worried!"

"Yeah we did. Crisis over. She lost track of time." his voice shook.

"You ok dad?"

"Yeah baby just tired."

"Ok I'll see you tomorrow ok."

"Ok baby girl. See you later. Love you."

"Love you dad." she disconnected. His hand shook as he put the phone back in the cradle.

Oh no he'd nearly kissed Melissa. He walked to her bedroom door and knocked on it.

"Go away!" she said.

"Miss we gotta talk." he said.

"No we don't." she retorted.

"Look this is serious."

"No it isn't. Nothing happened."

"Are you decent?"

"Why?" she asked worried.

"Coz I'm coming in!"

"No I'm decent then. I don't have a stitch on!"

"Liar!" He said and opened the door.

"Danny!" she shrieked in outrage. "I could have been…" she blushed.

God she never blushed. Ever!

He saw her bag open, why was she leaving? She could do that to him! What! Where does he get off having these thoughts and feelings about her?

"Look Melissa."

"God we are on a proper first name basis now?" she covered her face with her hands.

"Look Miss. Nothing happened. It was an emotive moment!"

"It's best if I go home Danny. It really is!" she tried to stress to him the importance. He didn't get it.

"Look we don't have to make a big deal of it. Nothing happened! And it was a lapse. This doesn't change our friendship. We'll just forget it happened!"

"Danny do you realise who we are? And what we nearly did?"

"So we nearly kissed. I kissed Shauna all the time. And you for that matter when Alice was alive!" Albeitly on the cheek and never the way he wanted to kiss her there but he was ignoring that fact…for now.

"But…"

"Look you and Karl have split and I was worried you were ill. We needed comfort and seen each other. Nothing happened. No harm done!"

"And we both know that nothing will happen coz Alice is your wife. A lapse. Your right I think!" she agreed.

He nodded.

"This changes nothing you know." he told her.

She eyes him dubiously.

"I mean it. I don't want this affecting our friendship."

She exhaled and nodded.

"So you won't go home?"

"Not yet." she told him

He gave her a half smile. "See you tomorrow."

"yeah see you." she said with no enthusiasm at all.

He left her room and she recovered her face with her hands. God she was weak. She should have said authoritatively that she was going home. End of. She was in big trouble and she had no one to turn to. Not even Shauna. She couldn't tell Shauna she almost kissed Danny. She'd freak out, like Missy was doing right now!

(X)

Missy got no sleep last night and didn't come out of her room until she was sure Danny was out of the house. She walked silently through the house. Lexi came up behind her.

"Missy!"

She spun and jumped. "Christ you sounded like your mother there!" she declared.

"You ok?"

No. "Yes I'm fine." she lied.

"Right spill!"

"I'm fine!" she stressed. God she was saying that word a lot lately.

"No your not so spill!"

"God you are your mothers daughter." Missy told her dryly.

"What is it Miss?" Lexi asked.

"I spoke to Shauna." she evaded.

"And obviously she was a big help if your still stressing!" she said logically.

"Look Lex it's nothing!"

She collapsed on a chair in the kitchen. God she wished she could just disappear.

Lexi scrutinised her face.

"How's Ethan and Zoey?" Missy asked.

"Good. Stop distracting me." she stared intensely. Then smiled widely.

"Your in love!"

"I AM NOT!"

"I knew it!" Lexi clapped. "Who is it?"

"I'm not in love!" Missy hissed.

"You can have your wedding here! When do I get to meet him? I'll have dad warn him not to hurt you!"

At the mention of Danny Missy paled slightly. Only slightly but Lexi noticed it. Lexi's jaw dropped and her eyes darkened.

"O you haven't!" she asked in warning.

"Your right I haven't. I WOULDN'T!" Missy replied not even pretending ignorance.

"How could you?" Lexi asked. "My dad! My freaking DAD!"

"Look Lex there's nothing…I'm not…look I don't love your dad ok!" she stressed.

Lexi's eyes narrowed. "Anyone but you I could stand. Not you!"

"Excuse me? What the hell does that mean? am I not good enough for him or something?" she asked hurt and offended. Nearly angry. She breathed to control herself.

"Don't dare turn this around on me!" Lexi warned.

"Explain what you meant to me then!"

"You're my mothers best friend. God your practically a second mother to me. And you do this?"

"Look Lex…..Can we go outside?"

Lexi glared but they walked outside to a quiet spot. "Look Lex I don't love your dad I promise."

Lexi went to interrupt.

"But I…." she exhaled. "I am falling for him…I think." she decided honesty was the best policy.

"How could you!" Lexi spat.

"You think I want this? You think I'm not desperately trying to stop this from happening? You think I don't feel guilty as hell? He is your mothers husband. My best friend. I mean God how wrong is that? But Lex I can't control how I feel!"

"TRY!" Lexi spat then went silent.

"I was gonna leave last night." she decided to lie here. "But I realise I told Amie I was staying for 3 weeks. I'm gonna get in touch with work. Fake an emergency. And I won't be back. Ever. I can't do that. I can't!"

"Too right you can't!" Lexi fumed.

"Lex I didn't plan this you know. You have no idea how bad I feel about this! How I've betrayed your mum!"

"Don't talk to me Missy!" Lexi walked away and left her alone.

Missy hated this! See this was why she never wanted to fall in love! Look what it does. It wrecks everything!

She went inside pulled on her trainers, tracksuit bottoms and a t-shirt. Time for a run. If she didn't run she'd hit something and lashing out felt better but helped no one in the long run. She plugged her Ipod in her ear and jogged.

(X)

Lexi was foaming. Without thinking she rang Shauna.

"Did you know?" she spat as Shauna picked up the phone.

Shauna exhaled. "Hello Shauna. Well hello Lexi how are you." Shauna said dryly.

"Did you know?" Lexi repeated.

"Why do people never say hello on the phone anymore? Just shoot questions at me without even introducing themselves!" Shauna asked.

"Shauna!" Lexi warned angrily.

"Yes Lex I knew. I assume your talking about Missy. To be honest I knew if your mother ever died that your dad and Missy would hit it off. Would be attracted to each other. It was never an issue when your mother was here coz they both love her too much but with her gone they can't help it. Your mum knew it too!"

"What?"

"Yeah Lex she did. 20 years ago on her wedding day she saw your dad and Missy talking and carrying on at the bar. She felt abit worried coz she knew there was potential there. But your dad only ever had eyes for her."

"How could she though Shauna. This is my dad. My mums husband!"

"Lex this isn't easy for her you know. She rang me panicked asking how to stop this. She's never been in love properly before and it's killing her that it's your dad."

"I hate her for this and mum would too!" Lexi said heatedly.

"No your mum wouldn't. Your mum after freaking out would give them her blessing coz she loves them."

"My dad hasn't got feelings for her. This is completely one sided."

"I wouldn't be too sure about that Lex. Feelings this intense are very rarely one sided. I'm not trying to upset you or anything."

"Your wrong Shauna. WRONG! Dad would never do that to mum." Lexi declared.

"Lex your acting like they have a choice. Love never gives you a choice!"

"Your wrong Shauna and it doesn't matter coz she's told me she's leaving and never coming back!" Lexi said triumphantly.

"You really wanna hurt your dad like that Lex? Coz if she leaves without a word and no reason. Then never goes back that is how he'll feel."

"He won't! He loves my mum!" she yelled.

"Fair enough just say he doesn't love Missy. How would he feel if he never sees his friend again?" Shauna asked.

"He'd be happy to get away from her and her creepy feelings!"

"No he'll be upset coz he'll be losing your mums best friend and one of his own. He'll be upset coz he'll never see her again and he'll never know why!"

"Shut up Shauna you have no idea what your talking about!"

"If she leaves without a word it'll hurt him Lex I've warned yo…."

Lexi disconnected.

Lexi walked in her house. Ethan had Zoey's hands and she was walking.

"That's my girl." he crooned. "Aren't you the best?"

He looked up at Lexi. "Look at Zo…what's wrong?" he saw her expression.

He picked Zoey up and put her in he playpen. Zoey immediately picked up her glo doll and bit it's ear.

"Honey." Ethan coaxed. "Tell me!"

"Missy is in love with my dad."

Ethan closed his eyes.

"And Shauna is trying to tell me dad loves her too. She's lost her mind hasn't she?"

Ethan stayed silent.

"Hasn't she Ethan?" she repeated coldly.

"No Lex. Your dad has got feelings for Missy!"

Lexi's face went bright red. "Not you too Eth? My dad wouldn't forget my mum so easily!"

"No one said anything about forgetting your mum your mum was his best friend. He'll never forget her. He'll always love her. But Lex your mum is gone!"

"It's wrong Ethan!"

"Fine if you die. Would you hate me if I fell for Liv? Would you hate her?"

"That is different!" she defended.

"Not it's not Lex. It's exactly the same!"

"Yes then I'd hate you both!"

"No you wouldn't. You'd want us to be happy. You'd be relieved that I didn't spend the rest of my life alone. Mourning you!"

"I miss my mum Ethan. I thought she did. No she just had impressions on my dad!" Lexi fumed.

"She misses your mum too Lex. We all do your dad especially. And they grew close. Relied on each other. Feelings were inevitable!"

"But she's my mums best friend!" Lexi stressed.

"You know Lex the reason why your mum and dad were so good together was coz they were friends too. The same goes for us too. The best relationships, the ones last are the ones which are rooted in friendships. When you look at someone and see something that wasn't there the day before. When you are friends first and it develops into something more. Sorry if I'm in therapist mode I've just had a private session this morning and I haven't quite turned it off yet." he chuckled.

Lexi smiled. "Is this not even slightly weird to you?"

"Not at all. No more weird than our relationship might seem to other people. We both know you can't control love. It just happens."

"She's leaving Ethan. I said some stuff and she told me she's going and not coming back. Ever. Will that hurt my dad do you think?"

He nodded. "Especially if she just ups and leaves which she will coz she won't tell him she has feelings for him. He won't tell her he has feelings either coz the other will be thinking this is weird. We'll be betraying Alice et cetera."

"Do you think they'd be good together. You know as a couple?"

"I think we should support them if they fall in love. Love is a gift Lex and to be honest did you expect him to be alone for the rest of his life?" Ethan asked.

"No but Missy you know what I mean?"

"She's the lesser of two evils if you ask me. You know her. She loves you and your brother and sister. She loves your mum so it won't be like a competition. And she wouldn't hurt your dad or mess him around. Who knows your dad would end up with! He hasn't dated in a long time and isn't up to speed with the games woman sometimes play."

Lexi nodded.

"You calmer now honey?" Ethan asked.

Lexi smiled and nodded.

"Are you sure feelings are there?"

"Yes. For both of them!"

Lexi exhaled. "I suppose she is a good person. And she's practically like a second mum to me anyway so…."

"You wanna go talk to her?" he asked.

"Would you mind. This was our day together." she mentioned.

"How about me and Zoey come too yeah?"

They got their daughter and went to leopards den.

**A/N lexi freaked out and went into meltdown. she's calmer now but will she be more accepting or will she tell missy to leave and never come back?**


	17. Worries and Judgements

Missy jogged back to leopards den. She should of took water. Idiot. Red hot climate and you go running without water. She shook her head as she felt a wave of dizziness over take her. She started to walk. Panted. She really was parched. Sweat poured off her face. Her legs started to feel funny. Like rubber. She felt a rush of heat wash over her from head to toe. She stopped. Waited for it to end. She started walking again on wobbly legs. She really needed a drink! She felt a even bigger wave of dizziness claim her. She heard someone say her name but it sounded distant and far away. Her head felt light and she couldn't keep her eyes open. She slumped to the floor.

(X)

Lexi parked her car at Leopards Den. Saw Missy walking towards them. Her face was red and she looked really hot.

"Hey Miss." she shouted.

Her dad walked out onto the veranda. A look passed over Melissa's face and without warning Missy hot the floor.

"Melissa!" her dad yelled. His face said it all. He loved her too.

Lexi ran towards her too. "Let me in dad."

She turned Missy over. Her breathing was good. Pulse strong. She was covered in sweat. Running possibly?

"Missy it's Lex can you hear me?"

Missy's eyes fluttered. She frowned. "What?"

"Your ok Miss. You fainted. Dad go get some water."

"I'm ok help me up!" Missy said stubbornly.

"Just sit for abit yeah Missy."

"No. I need to sort some stuff." she went to stand. As soon as she was on her feet she wobbled and ended up on her bum in the dirt.

"Miss listen to me!" Lexi snapped.

"Yes master!" she grumbled and crossed her arms petulantly.

"I brought juice. You know sugar. She looks like she's been running." Danny returned.

Missy rolled her eyes.

"Drink it Miss." Lexi handed it to her. Danny watched her on his haunches.

Missy sipped her juice. Felt the sugar as it rushed through her veins. "I'm ok. I just didn't take any water when I went running. It was a stupid thing to do. Anyway I need to make tracks. Work…"

"Miss we need to talk." Lexi said.

"No Lexi we don't!" Missy told her softly.

Danny looked between them.

"Lex Zoey needs you. She's shouting ma ma!" Ethan told her. Then motioned with his head.

"We'll talk later yeah Miss." Lexi said and walked away.

"Don't count on it." Missy muttered.

Missy sat on the floor waiting for her energy to return.

"Are you ok Melissa?" Danny asked.

"Yes." she said stiffly.

"Don't be like this Miss please." he went for her hand and she pulled it away.

"I'm normal Danny."

"This stiff formal attitude isn't you!" he said frustrated.

"I'm normal Danny!" she repeated.

"Well if you'll act like this for a kiss that didn't happen then I might as well go for the whole hog huh?" he cupped her face tenderly and before she could protest, and before common sense intervened he kissed her.

His eyes closed. She tasted like orange juice but even without it she would be sweet. Her lips were soft against his. He couldn't get enough. He deepened the kiss. The last of her resistance melted away and she kissed him back with abandon.

O god she was kissing Danny. Never in her dreams would she have ever kissed him. Never in her wildest imagining would she had thought he was so good at it. After the initial shock her eyes closed and he deepened it. Her arms found his shoulders. She forgot she was kissing her best friends widow and he forget he was kissing his wife's best friend. For just a minute they were a man and woman sharing their first kiss. They broke the kiss at the same time not that either person wanted to. She gaped.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry! I didn't mean….I didn't want…well I did want…oh god I'll shut up now!" she babbled. She felt 15 again. She blushed crimson and hid her face in hands.

"Miss look at me." Danny told her softly.

She uncovered her eyes and looked at him.

"I instigated the kiss so it's me who should be apologising. I'm happy your ok. I was scared when I just saw you hit the floor." he frowned. "You mean a lot to me." he whispered.

"I know as Alice's friend." Missy supplied.

"No as MY friend! I'm sorry I kissed you." Liar he chided himself. "I guess I just reacted on feelings."

He smiled as he remembered her babbling. "There was no harm done was there?"

It was the first time she had seen him smile properly since Alice died. Her heart nearly stopped at the sight of it. God what was wrong with her. She never reacted to him in this way before!

"C'mon I'll help you up yeah?" he asked.

He stood up grabbed her hand and pulled her to standing. They stood still, he still held her hand.

"Wow, I never noticed how brown your eyes are before. They are the most amazing shade." he murmured.

"Look Danny I gotta go." she said softly. "You know work commitments."

"Miss you left your work phone at home."

"They need me." she evaded. Pulled her hand from his. Walked towards the house. Knew that this was her last goodbye with Danny. Her heart was breaking.

"Missy."

"Leave me Danny. My job is my job ok!" she snapped.

Jogged up the stairs. Saw Lexi sat on the bed in her room. Waiting.

"Don't worry Lex. I'm gone. I've told your dad I'm leaving. So if you wouldn't mind I'd like to hug you and say goodbye. I meant what I said I'm always here for you. I won't be coming down face to face for a while. Maybe ever again but we can email phone text."

"I'm sorry Miss." Lexi said sincerely.

"No I'm sorry for betraying your mum. I understand how you feel. So now can I have my hug so I can go?"

"No." Lexi said.

"NO?" she questioned. "But why?"

"Coz your staying!"

"Lex I'm not staying I need to go home. I can't stay here and do this anymore." Missy told her.

"MY mum knew." Lexi said simply.

"Knew what Lex?"

"My mum knew that if she was ever out of the picture that you and my dad would become close and develop feelings. She knew you'd fall for each other. Recognised the potential there."

"Lex I'm confused."

"My mum she knew this would happen. Way back on her wedding day she recognised when he first met you. About what could happen between you two if she wasn't there."

"Lexi you've lost it. Your dad loves your mum!"

"And had strong feelings for you!" she added.

"No he doesn't." Lexi told her heatedly.

"And that kiss?" Lexi asked.

Missy blushed. "That was er….what kiss?" she fudged.

"God you are so transparent!" Lexi smiled.

"Lex you don't understand. I can't stay. I can't! it's too hard!"

"Fine then Miss. I'm sorry. And I wouldn't mind if you and dad…well I know you wouldn't hurt him and that's what matters right?"

"NO what matters is how much I love your mum. And the loyalty I feel to her. That is something no man will ever break. So I'm going. I love your mum too much to have a man come between us. No matter how much I care!"

"Miss just stay. These last 3 weeks please. So we can spend time with you. Avoid my dad if you have to. Please if you never come back who knows when we'll see you again if ever!"

Missy paused. "Go on emotionally blackmail me!"

"Is it working?" Lexi asked grinning.

"Yes." she exhaled nosily. "Fine Lex I will stick out the next couple of weeks."

Missy knew she was gonna regret this!

Lexi smiled. "Thank you."

"So where are Ethan and Zoey?"

"In the living room no doubt. Ethan hold Zoey's hands while she takes steps."

Missy smiled. "He's a good father."

"Yes he is. He's so proud of every little thing she does."

**A/N missy is staying against her better judgement ooo wot will happen spesh after their kiss oooo**


	18. The Fayre

Preparations for the fayre were nearly all set up. They had music with big speakers set up. Cake and other food stands set up manned by Caroline and Nomsa. Tombola and raffles. Danny had made cards about Africa's dangerous animals with information and stats on them. A goal with targets. Hook a duck and other games. Everyone was running around finishing up. Thabo's friend had got his hands on a pool where you threw a ball and if you hit the target a man was dunked. Lexi was sat on the board fiddling with the back. Ethan smiled and walked towards her.

"O Lexi." he said sweetly. She looked at him. Then at the ball in his hands.

"You freaking dare and I'll have you!" she warned smiling.

He smiled wider. Wrong words to say. He never could turn down a dare. He threw the ball up in the air. Caught it. Smiled at her cockily.

"No way Eth the water is freez…."

He threw the ball, it hit the target and she disappeared into the water below. He giggled at the look on her face. She glared at him. Laughter and revenge in her eyes.

"You are so dead Ethan. I swear I will get you!"

"I'm on there later. So we'll see!" he leaned over the edge and kissed her heatedly. "That you should warm you up darling." he winked

"I knew I should have filled this last. And by the way I'm filling this with ice cubes when it's your turn!" she said seriously.

He laughed. "I love you too honey!"

(X)

Missy was stood at the drinks stand. Ata the fireman who liked her was by her side.

"You know if you wanna buy me at the auction I'll make sure you have the night of your life! You'll be begging to marry me by the end!" he said cockily.

"You sure do know how to make a girls heart skip a beat." she laughed.

"No seriously. I wine and dine. Treat a woman special. Like ladies. I come across as a lothario with load of lines but inside I'm soft as butter. Cuddly too. Try me."

"Thanks but I'll pass."

"Purely for research purposes." he pressed.

"If I do. IF it is not a yes to a date. Or a declaration of undying devotion."

"I got an if. She's warming to me. YES!"

Missy laughed again.

"So?" he opened his arms.

She exhaled and stepped into the, "Wow. You are surprisingly cuddly. For all that muscle."

"I have the hug down to a fine art. So how long you here for?"

"2 more weeks. Dunno if I'll be back after that."

"Well I would like to spend 14 days of your 2 weeks with you."

"God you are incorrigible." she told him smiling.

"I get told it's one of my endearing qualities."

Missy had an idea. Maybe, just maybe if she did spend time with Ata then these stupid feelings for Danny would disappear. I mean he's cute and single and funny and she does like him a little.

"IF I agree to a night out with you what would you want in return? At the end of the night?"

"Hey I'm a good boy. No doubt it will be you leading me astray!"

She laughed "I agree with you there actually."

Danny walked over. "Hey."

"Hey Danny. Ethan is doing great as fire chief. He never shuts up when we're on site or a drill. Always yelling and pointing." Ata shook his head.

"Yeah. Look Miss can I talk to you?" Danny asked.

"Well I'm a little busy Dan…" she looked at him and forgot what she was going to say. "I'll be a minute Ata."

"I just wanna ask you what I should wear to this auction thingy?"

She looked down at him. "Depends on whether you wanna attract someone. Wear your good clothes. Jeans and shirt. If you really don't care tracksuit bottoms and t-shirt. If you planning on going in for the kill suit. Which personally I think is OTT." but she shrugged.

He nodded. "What would you suggest?"

"Alice always mentioned she liked you in dark shirts but I saw in you a really nice white bench shirt once which looked really good on you. And dark blue jeans if you have any. Not black if you can."

At his look she said. "I used to 'suggest' to Karl what I liked him to wear sometimes."

"This is weird. Essentially dressing to get people to notice me."

"Poor baby." she laughed.

"Do you think Alice would mind?" he asked.

"No." Missy replied simply. "She wouldn't want you to be alone. Plus It's one date. Not a lifelong commitment."

"I worry who's gonna buy me."

She smiled. "I'm sure someone you know will take pity on you."

"How all the bids are wrote down and placed in a box! Why did I agree to do this?" he asked.

"Coz you love your son. Go on get ready. And be charming. Woo all the ladies!"

He rolled his eyes comically.

She went back to Ata. "Where were we?" she asked.

"You were just about to agree to a date with me. Tomorrow night."

"I might. Might. Play your cards right and you might get a yes. You're a good guy." she kissed his cheek.

(X)

Danny walked up towards the house. Missy was smiling with Ata. She hugged him. Willingly. She was laughing with him. And finally she kissed his cheek! This is just completely not right. He tried to get her away from him but she went right back! Ata is a rebound Danny a rebound from Karl just excuse yourself a minute Danny. What on earth are you doing? Yes idiot. Melissa is not yours. So stop with this possessive jealous crap ok! And if she is attracted to Ata wish her well! It's not her fault you've grown this stupid infatuation with her. Technically she is your rebound!

He walked in his room and flopped down on his bed. She had to go home soon. He was losing his marbles. Really losing his mind. It was all her fault too. Her attractive smile and dancing eyes and bubbly personality. O god he had it bad. But it wasn't love. He had no heart to give.

"Yeah Alice no matter what my heart is yours and always will be. I love you honey!" he vowed.

There was a soft knock.

"C'min."

The door opened and Missy's head popped in his room. "Ethan would like to see all the fresh meat, er… auction men in the canopy."

"urg!" he grunted.

"Lying on your bed isn't gonna get you dressed!"

"You offering to help?" he asked without thinking.

She blushed but could never resist a challenge. "if I need to."

He frowned.

Her eyes glittered. Lets see who backs down first!

"I'm all yours." he said lying back arms behind his head.

She froze. He smiled at his victory.

That smile annoyed her. She walked into his room closed the door and went into his wardrobe pulled out his white shirt and jeans. "Well you just gonna lie there?"

"Yup." he replied.

Melissa froze again. "Do I win yet Miss?" he goaded with a cocky smile.

"Never!" she fumed. Grabbed his hand and pulled him up to sitting. As soon as she let go he flopped back down.

"Danny!" she snapped. "Sit up."

"No." he told her.

"Fine!" she said. "You wanna mess with me?" she climbed over him and straddled his waist and started unbuttoning his shirt.

"Right ok you win!" he yelped panicked.

"No. I'm having fun messing with you!"

"Miss!" he squeaked.

She climbed off him. "Don't try and mess with me if your not prepared for me to take it to the next level!" she warned. Angry for some reason.

Her anger made him angry.

"How about I take it to the next? Stood up and kissed her heatedly. She responded immediately. God she forgot her name. Forgot where she was. Just that she was kissing Danny. Danny who is Alice's.

"NO!" she said pulled from his arms. "Look Danny I admit you win!" she said shakily. Nearly ran from his room.

"He won?" his mind still spun. Wow that kiss! Who would have dreamed that Missy would have such passion inside her. For a second she kissed him back fully and wow. He forget what century they were in never mind who he was. Oh god what was he doing? Kissing other woman in his bedroom! He'd been about 2 seconds away from guiding her to his bed when she pulled away. Thank god this wasn't his and Alice's room he had moved out of there. That would have been the worst and final insult to her memory.

"Do you hate me Alice?" he whispered. "I hate me!"

(X)

Miss what on earth were you thinking huh? Your 40 years old you should know better than to rise to a dare like that. Your supposed to be mature responsible an adult! Stupid idiot. Climbing on him! She blushed bright red at the memory. God she shouldn't have lost her temper. She was just annoyed that he wasn't backing down and she would have to! So she had pushed and he pushed back. She tried to block the memory of his kiss. It was hard. Right she was leaving. Decision made no backing down this time. This time she wouldn't tell no one she would just go. Ata walked towards her.

"A my date for tomorrow."

"Your maybe date for tomorrow." she reminded.

"O I was looking forward to it too." he murmured. "so you gonna bid on me then?" he asked.

"I'm not gonna tell you. Might make you cocky."

She wasn't bidding on anyone. Then again she might place a bid on someone. Ethan maybe for a giggle but put anonymous on it. Lexi would be pissed. She smiled. Lexi hadn't been happy about Ethan putting himself in the auction but he barely had anyone at the time and he said he fully expected Lex to buy him anyway seeing as she loved him so much. She had said she wasn't bidding and the men weren't allowed near the bid box either. This was bound to be a laugh!

**A/N this missy danny relationships is gettin stronger and harder for them to control now they r both hurt confused and angry at themselves!**


	19. Bidding Results

The fayre was in full swing. Money was exchanging hands and the bidding booth was full of ladies. Ethan had taken photos of all the men and placed them on a board. The ladies smiled appreciatively.

"Ooo look at Ethan, he looks so sexy his dark eyes laughing." a young woman said.

There were 10 men. Danny and Ethan included so that should raise some money.

Lexi was holding Zoey. Walking around. She noticed Missy was avoiding her dad like the plague. She had an idea. Wrote out 2 bids. One in Missy's name and the other in her own. Placed them in the box. Then went to see Ethan. He had on a comical fireman's suit on. He was sat on a board bone dry.

"C'mon the Lex. I've been on here 30 minutes and no one has dunked me yet. Come and do it if you think your good enough!"

"Shall we take daddy down a peg or twenty?" she asked Zoey.

Zoey gurgled. "Dadadadadada." she waved at him.

"Hello angel!" he chortled and waved. Zoey clapped.

"See my baby is a genius!" he told everyone.

She paid her money and checked the water. "Nice and cold. Good!" handed the money to Thandi asked her if she'd hold Zoey too.

She held her 3 balls. Threw one.

Missed.

"Ooo so close Lex!" he grinned.

Threw the second. It was closer.

"I thought you had me!" he said playfully.

Threw the third.

Missed again.

"YES!" he whooped "The undunked streak continues. Better luck next time honey!" he crowed. Wiggling his bum on the seat grinning.

"You will be wet by my hand by tonight Ethan!" she warned.

He wiggled his eyebrows.

(X)

Missy was at the drinks standing covering for Caroline. She was taking money and handing out drinks. She had her back turned.

"I'll be a minute!" she shouted.

She turned. "Save me!" Danny pleaded.

"Danny?" she had avoided him. Had just been about to collect her case to go when Caroline asked her to help at the drinks booth.

"Save me!" he repeated.

"We don't have a drink by that name sorry!" she said seriously.

He shook his head. "Fatani's mother bid on me! Please I'll give you the money if you bid!"

"Tut tut Daniel that is cheating if she wants a date."

"Please do you wanna see a grown man cry? Beg?"

She considered. He grinned.

"If Shauna was here she'd do it for me!"

"I'm not Shauna Danny." she reminded him.

"Yeah your not. About before in my room I didn't kiss you to win."

"Um, yeah you did Danny," she said talking to him like he was stupid.

"I didn't. I don't know why I kissed you. I really don't. I just did." he admitted.

"I gotta get back to my customers." she evaded.

"We need to talk Miss."

"I see Fatani's mother." she whispered.

"Nice try." he told her.

"No really she's heading straight for you. Don't look back just walk away!"

His eyes widened. "You know what she said to me. She said I remind her of chicken. A nice bit of white meat she wants to get her teeth into!" he said in horror.

"She has a hungry look in her eyes Danny. Run!" she said dramatically.

He hurried away and she had a smile on her face for no reason.

(X)

The fayre was winding down. All the food and drinks had been sold. Prizes won. Now was the time to tell the results of the bidding.

Danny stood beside Missy. Looking apprehensive.

"Did you bid on me?" he asked.

"Nope." she said grinning.

"How could you do that to me?" he asked feigning hurt.

"It wouldn't of been fair Danny."

Ata was up. He winked at her. She smiled.

"He's a fool." Danny said dryly.

"I should have a laugh tomorrow then."

"You bid on him?" Danny asked.

"No he asked me out and I've decided to accept when I see him."

"O." he said softly.

Danny's name was called. "Thank you for sparing me Missy."

He walked up like a condemned man.

"Right here is Daniel Trevanion. Fine specimen huh ladies."

There was a murmur of approval.

"Shut up Ethan!" Danny told him.

Ethan laughed.

Someone wolf whistled.

"Is James here?" Danny asked.

"No I did it on his behalf." Missy yelled.

"Anyway." Ethan said. "We have had a fair few bids for such a old sorry vintage man."

"Hey I'm still young enough to kick your ass kid!"

Ethan laughed.

"But the winner is…"

Danny looked down at Fatani's mother and almost cried.

"Melissa Lynch!"

Missy's jaw dropped. Then she looked at Lexi who was almost rolling on the floor in laughter at the comical look on her face.

"C'mon Miss." Lexi said grinning evilly.

Missy glared at her. "Your dead child!" she warned.

"Family members aren't allowed to bid!" Fatani's mother spoke up.

"She's not family." Danny told her.

"She's your daughters aunt."

"In name only. She is no relation to me or my wife!" he said relieved.

She crossed her arms. Missy walked up and he offered her his arm.

"Cut it out Danny." she said as they walked down. "Your daughter planned this. I shall strangle her first chance I get!" she vowed.

"Admit it you bid coz you want my body!" he grinned.

"Danny I didn't bid on anyone not even Ata."

"Why?" Danny asked.

"Coz I didn't want to."

Lexi winked at her across the canopy. Missy narrowed her eyes. "We'll talk later Danny yeah?"

(X)

"Right for the most handsome man tonight." Ethan said. "Me!" he grinned.

"I should warn all the ladies unfortunately I am unable to give you my heart. It belongs to only one lady. My daughter Zoey Bell who is asleep at the moment."

There was a chorus of awws.

"Anyways let me open up this envelope. Right the VERY lucky lady who has me is…." he looked up.

"Victoria Ebua."

Lexi's face turned thunderous.

Victoria walked up and he handed her a rose. She smiled.

"If you wanna go down there I just need to wrap up." he told her with a smile.

He looked at Lexi who glared at him. He shrugged apologetically. She walked away.

"I would like to thank everyone for coming down here today and for contributing to the fayre. For giving generously and taking part. If you don't already know I'm Ethan Bell. Fire chief at Glen Afric. I know my baby face gives me away. Anyway if at any time you want to talk about any type of safety and prevention my door is always open. I'm also setting up classes and doing talks at schools in the area. So again thank you all for coming and giving. All the money we have raised today is going towards making a better and safer fire department. Thanks a lot." he smiled again. Walked to the back to seek out Victoria.

He saw her. "Hi I'm Ethan." he shook her hand. "And tonight we can do what you want."

"I'm not bothered." she said smiling.

"How about a film then dinner?" he suggested.

"Sounds good."

"Anything you wanna see?" he asked holding the car door open for her.

"No not really. Can I just say what you said about your daughter was just adorable."

"Thanks." he said slightly embarrassed.

"She's lucky to have you."

"I'm lucky to have her. She brightens my day by just being there."

Her face turned sentimental. "Awww that is so cute!"

He best shut up. She had stars in her eyes. And Lexi was already pissed at him!

"So how old is your daughter?"

"She's one. Smart as a whip too."

"What is her…."

"Hey this night is a date for you." he told her softly steering the conversation away from his child. She was a stranger after all.

"Yeah." she said smiling at him. "I'm gonna enjoy getting to know you."

God why on earth did she make that sound like a threat? He paled.

**A/N Lex is pissed at ethan never good. and danny was 'bought' for missy wot will happen? will they go on a date?**


	20. Revealed

Danny and Missy were walking around leopards den. Picking up rubbish.

"This is my date Daniel?" She asked in mock horror. "How on earth did Alice resist you?" she asked seriously.

He looked at her smiling. "I thought you didn't buy me." he said pointedly.

"I didn't."

"Well why should I take you on a decent date if your not gonna pay for me?" he paused. "That sounded so wrong!" he laughed.

"Cheapskate!" she said playfully.

"Hey if I wanted I could romance the socks off you."

"Oooo my socks." she laughed. "Big whoop!"

His mobile beeped. He checked his texts. "The kids have fell asleep at Dupe's and Caroline's."

"Why did they go over there exactly?" Missy asked.

Caroline needed help with some heavy platters. She took Daniel and then Amie wanted to go too." he told her.

"When we're finished we'll go get them huh?" she suggested.

"Sounds good."

They picked up the litter in silence.

"You ever hear a song which you thought defines your life?" she asked.

"I dunno, have you?" he asked.

"I think so. A Dixie chicks song. Not the whole song but I hear lines in it and I think yeah that's me."

"ooo what song. You're a bit mad so this is bound to be good."

"The long way around. It's about a woman who does things her own way and won't follow conventional rules and stuff. And takes the long way around coz it's better that way. One bit really applies to me. she sang it to him.

**But I could never follow. **

**No I could never follow.**

**Well I never seem to do it like anybody else.**

**Maybe someday someday I'm gonna settle down.**

**If you ever wanna find me I can still be found.**

**Taking the long way. Taking the long way around**

He smiled. She had a really good singing voice. Powerful without losing it's tune. "Your not like that really."

"You'd be surprised. When I was 17 I did what happened at the beginning of the song. Just up and left. No one heard from me for 3 years. I just travelled. Had fun you know. Shauna and Alice were pissed coz I didn't send them postcards. I just had to get away you know. Take the long way around like the songs says. Get stuff sorted in my head. Met some gorgeous men along the way too." she grinned wickedly.

"Trail of broken hearts behind you eh Miss."

"Miles long." she told him laughing.

"Then I came back and got a job. Started my business. Sometimes I just wish I could get up and travel again you know. Have that freedom. I dislike being in any one place too long."

"I'm different. I like the security of going home to the same place. Making that place your home. Having family close. Protecting them the same way they protect you." Danny told her.

"Home isn't always secure though Danny is it?" she asked without thinking. "And family aren't always your protectors!" she froze.

He frowned at her quizzically waiting for her to elaborate.

"Why can't people just use bins?" she asked changing the subject. "We put enough out."

"I know. It's annoying." he said respecting her right not to tell him what was on her mind. "Right next to a bin and they drop the litter to the floor."

More silence.

"Look Danny I was joking about the date stuff." she shook her head for emphasis. "I'll give you an out yeah. Let's just say Lexi bought you in Alice's name."

"But your name was on the paper not Alice's."

"So." Missy replied.

"Look Miss it's no harm going out for a meal with you. You're a good friend. It'll be relaxed and not at all awkward."

For him! She thought. But said. "I suppose so."

"And at the end of the night there'll be no expectations to call you. Or other stuff."

"I agree." she said vigorously.

"Simple." he smiled at her.

"Yeah. Simple." she muttered her tone laced with anything resembling a simple frame of mind. "When you gonna empty the dunk pool then Dee?"

"Dee? Um no Emm." he told her in disgust.

"I'm waiting for a reply Dee."

He gave her a stern look.

"Ok ok. When are you emptying the pool Danny. Happy?"

"Overjoyed and I'm emptying it tomorrow but taking the back off tonight."

She nodded. "I'll ring Caroline. Then come help you with the back huh?"

"Kay."

She took his rubbish bag and binned it along with hers then jogged inside. He loosened the bolts on the back being care not to touch the side panel which would make the water flood out there. Then he had to loosen the bolts on the front. He looked and made sure Missy was still in the house. Put temptation in front of her and she'd invariably take it. He leaned over and loosed the ones closet to him but couldn't rich the other one without climbing onto the boards.

He was sat on it when Missy approached.

"Hey Danny I can't find the number for caro…."

Her eyes lit up and she grinned like a Cheshire cat when she saw him.

"Don't do it Missy!" he warned.

She ran over and out her hand on the trigger. "What? You mean press this?" she grinned wickedly.

"That's right." he told her.

"What happens if I really want to?" her eyes twinkling with merriment. She caressed the trigger lovingly.

"But you don't want to Missy." he said trying to convince her.

"I do Danny!" she said seriously. Nodding.

"No Miss you only think you do but you don't really!" he said trying to hypnotise her.

"Actually Danny I just think I do!" and she pressed it.

He disappeared under the water. She laughed hard. Even harder when he surfaced. The look on his face comical. She was bent double laughing. She stood up straight and looked at him. The look of disgust on his face cracked her up. She closed her eyes trying to keep a straight face. She burst again.

"O yeah laugh it up Missy!" he said with a smile. "Revenge will be mine!"

"But I did nothing!" she said laughing.

He climbed out of the pool clothes dripped and gestured to himself. "Nothing huh?"

She grinned.

He started shrugging out of his jacket which was weighing him down. He looked like he was wrestling with it.

"Here let me help you." she said and walked behind him and peeled it off his shoulders.

"C'mon go in the house and change." she handed him his jacket.

"Will you phone Caroline and tell her we'll be a bit late?"

"That's what I came out to say I don't know her number and couldn't find it in the phone book."

He told her the number and she walked ahead of him. He smiled as an idea came to him. Ran behind her and wrapped his dripping jacket around her. Put his arms around her and squeezed her from behind.

"Danny what you…?" she yelped.

"And that wasn't even my revenge girly!" he breathed in her ear. Squeezed her once more and let her go.

"That was cold Daniel!" she said as the jacket fell to the floor and onto the ground. She was smiling.

"Courtesy of you dunking me!" he told her pointedly.

"Good point. We squits yet?"

"Not by a long shot!"

"O c'mon I'm cold now we gotta be squits!"

His eyes flared. "I'll warm you up." gathered her close.

She exhaled. Didn't bother fighting. Just let herself feel. "This is madness you know." she murmured getting lost in his eyes.

"I know." he agreed and lowered his head. She met him halfway and then threaded her fingers through his hair. He pulled back a little after a chaste kiss. "I can't resist you Melissa." he murmured. "I've tried but I can't."

"Me either." she admitted.

He kissed her again. Deeper this time.

"You taste so sweet." he murmured. "I love the way you taste." he wasn't even aware what he said.

Pulled her closer. His hands skimmed down her sides.

She pulled her lips from his reluctantly.

"The kids." she suggested.

He caressed her face and searched her eyes with his. "We need to talk."

She nodded. "I know."

"It might be best if…."

"The kids stay at Caroline's." she finished for him.

"Look all I wanna do is talk." he told her seriously.

She made face at him. "Who said I'd sleep with you anyway! You shower and I'll phone Caroline."

(X)

An hour later they were sat in the living room listening to the rain plink off the windows.

"Look…" they said in unison. Stopped.

"I…" again in unison. They both laughed.

"Look Miss." he paused. "I love you right. But I love you as Alice's best friend. And recently the lines in our friendship have been getting really blurry you know?"

She nodded.

"I've started seeing you differently and it's weird. I've never seen you in a …like a …god I'm fumbling like a teenager here!" he said in disgust. He gathered courage. "I've never thought of you in a sexual way before."

Missy blushed.

"But like I said my feelings are changing and I'm attracted to you in a big way. I've tried to ignore it. I've tried to stop it." he raised his hands in a I dunno gesture.

Time for honesty here Miss. He's been honest with you she told herself.

"Danny, this is the last time I'll be seeing you. When I go home I'm going for good. I'm struggling to be here. To be around you." she admitted.

He frowned.

"And it's not for the reason you might think Danny. I'm falling for you. Shauna warned me this would happen and I didn't believe her but it has and I don't want it to fall for you coz you're my best friends husband for Gods sake. But I have tried everything and it's not working. Flirting with other people. Ignoring you. Ignoring my feelings but Danny they're continuing to grow." she put her head in her hands, tortured.

"We make a pair eh?" he said. He saw her head nod slightly.

"I can't let it get to the stage where I'm in love with you. I've never loved anyone before Danny. I swear I think Alice planned this!" she told him.

"All she ever wanted was for you to find a man who loves you like you deserve to be loved." he told her.

"I doubt she had me falling for you in mind!"

His heart broke at her tone. She sounded tortured.

"I never expected to feel this way about anyone else. Ever!" he told her.

"This can never happen. We both know that!" she said raising her head.

He nodded. "The best thing for us to do is to avoid each other. So we don't kiss each other anymore."

She agreed. "Why does this hurt like hell?" she asked.

He swallowed. "I dunno." he admitted. Coz it was hurting him too. Really bad.

"It's not like we love each other." she said.

"I know." he agreed.

"I'm so sorry Danny. I didn't mean for this to happen!"

"Me either Missy. We just supported each other."

"Shauna told me feelings were inevitable."

"You spoke to Shauna?" he asked.

She nodded. "She said Alice knew if anything happened to her we'd develop feelings."

"Really?" he said incredulous.

"I know. How could they know? I never thought of you in that way!" Missy told him.

"Me either!"

"So we agree to stay from each other!" she said.

He nodded. "I'm sorry we've wrecked our friendship." he told her sincerely.

"Me too Danny."

She went to her room and closed the door.

**A/N ok so where do they go from here. they both know how the other feels and have come to a mutual decision that nothing can happen. and they are both heartbroken awww bless**


	21. Final Goodbye

**closure**

**Skillet - Say goodbye**

_Don't say goodbye_

_Cause I don't wanna hear those words tonight_

_Cause maybe it's not the end for you and I_

_And although we knew_

_This time would come for me and you_

_Don't say anything tonight_

_if your gonna say goodbye_

(X)

Missy was asleep. She was a kid again. 10 years old. She was talking to a 10 year old Alice on the swings.

"That Billy is an idiot Alice. Your too good for him!"

"I love him Miss!" Alice groaned.

"Well don't!" Missy retorted.

"You can't turn off your feelings Miss!"

"I can!" Missy said confidently.

"Not love Miss!"

"I can!" she declared.

"I'll love him forever!" Alice moaned.

"I'll never love anyone!" Missy said seriously.

"You will!" Alice told her. Swinging.

"No I won't, coz of the reason he broke up with you!"

"It's not Shauna's fault he likes her." Alice explained.

"Whose fault is it then?" Missy asked.

Alice shrugged. "No ones."

"I'll never love anyone if it'll come between me and my best friends!"

They swung in silence for a little bit she turned and saw a much older Alice sitting on the swing.

"Hello Miss. Ironic you dreamed that conversation huh?"

Missy looked down and saw her adult body also sitting on the swing.

"I'm still asleep yeah?" Missy asked.

Alice nodded.

"I suppose you wanna kick my ass?"

Alice laughed.

"I'd let you, you know. I'd kick my own ass if I could."

"That would be comical to watch!" Alice told her smiling.

"Alice yell at me. Hate me. Don't be calm about this please. I've betrayed you!"

"No Miss you haven't. You fell in love. You don't go looking. It just happens."

"But Alice he's your husband!"

"My widow Missy I'm dead and he isn't."

"Makes no difference Alice. We both still love you." Missy told her.

"I know and I still love the both of you. But I'm gone!"

They were silent swinging slightly.

"You know Miss there's no one else I'd rather have as a step mother to my kids. They need someone."

"They need their mum Alice. How about you have a word with the big man and we'll swap places?" Missy suggested.

"As much as I'd love to go back I wouldn't trade places with you. I couldn't anyway it was my time. I miss my kids like crazy. You and Shauna and mum too. Especially Danny but I can't go back. He loves you and I know you love him too."

"I swore I'd never let this happen Alice. God this is so wrong!"

"God Miss all you did was fall in love. I'd never begrudge you happiness and he needs you!"

"No Alice he needs you!"

"Miss I'm not there. It's you who makes him smile. You who makes him laugh and he sure isn't thinking of me when you kiss him."

"O you seen that? Kick my ass please it'll make me feel better!"

Alice chuckled. Then her face turned serious. "Don't abandon my family please Missy. My kids need a mother. Lexi is 24 but needs a confidant. And my babies they need a woman there. And they love you. Danny loves you. Please do it for me. It's the last thing I'll ask of you."

"Alice stop saying Danny loves me. It's freaking me out a little bit. I miss you Alice. Can't you find a way to come back? Then you and Danny can be happy." Missy told her hopefully.

"I couldn't. wouldn't. I've seen your future. I wouldn't ruin it for you."

Missy frowned.

"I see a little Trevanion in your future." she giggled. "My Missy a mother!"

"No freaking way!" Missy gasped and nearly back backwards off her swing.

Alice laughed. Threw back her head and almost roared with laughter. "God you haven't changed. You should see the terror on your face!"

"Can you see my future?" Missy asked worried.

Alice shook her head. "It's subjective. Changes when your decisions change. Look Miss whatever you decide to do be happy please. I love you Miss. My sister. My best friend. And if I could pick someone for Danny I'd pick you!"

Missy raised her eyebrows. "That I sincerely doubt!"

"No really. You were always like best friends. Like from the second you met. You had a bond. Similar to what I had with him. Shauna was right I knew feelings would develop. You keep him on his toes. Keep him guessing. Keep him smiling and laughing. Like you did with me and Shauna growing up."

Missy exhaled.

"It's time to grow up Miss. Leave all that stuff in the past. He has dictated your life long enough. Each day is a gift Miss. There's no second try when your gone. Leave your fears behind and embrace a new life."

"Can't I stay here with you?" Missy asked.

"Not yet. In a fair few years I'll see you again. And then I WILL kick your ass if you've mistreated him!"

"I do love you Alice."

"And I love you Miss. You and Danny have my blessing. Be happy. Don't argue and always kiss each other goodbye!"

Alice stood up as did Missy.

"Is this our last goodbye Alice?" tears in her eyes.

"For now. I'll be around. You'll feel me. I'll make sure of it!"

Alice and missy hugged tightly.

"Tell Shauna I love her too." she whispered in her friends ear.

"Why not visit her too?" Missy asked.

"I might." she said smiling. "Just be happy Miss. Whatever you decide. Never forget that I love you. Kiss my kids for me yeah?"

Missy closed her eyes as she hugged Alice. Then awoke in her bed. Breathing heavily. Tears leaking slowly from her eyes.

(X)

Danny tossed and turned to his bed. He was dreaming Alice's death.

"No!" he muttered and turned sharply.

He was in the hospital waiting room. Pacing frantically. Alice was in theatre. This had never happened before. Usually she was dead before they arrived!

He sat down and put his head in his hands. Felt a hand on his shoulder. Looked up.

"Alice?" he breathed. "You're here! Thank God. Should you even be standing?"

"Danny honey your dreaming I'm not real!"

"But you're here!" he countered.

She was silent. Sat beside him. "I'm so sorry Danny. I shouldn't have left that night but I genuinely thought I'd be ok."

"Alice don't…not after what I…."

"I know Danny." she paused. "I know how you feel about Missy."

"She's' a good friend." he supplied.

"Who your in love with."

"How can that be I love you!" he told her.

"You love me different to Missy. She touches parts of you I couldn't reach. Same way I touched parts of you she'll never reach. You don't have a quota of how many people you love Danny. You don't get one soul mate and that's it!"

"I need you Alice."

"You need Missy Danny. She's your future now. I'm dead Danny. I'm so sorry but I'm gone. And I'm not coming back."

His tears fell. "But I want you home!"

"And I wanna be home but that isn't gonna happen. She makes you happy Danny. Don't let her get away. She told you she was falling for you but that's wrong. She's loved you all along. And you loved her too. You both couldn't see it coz I was there. Now I'm gone it's clear and bright and glaringly obvious!"

His face turned. "I wouldn't cheat on you with your best friend. While we were married or now!"

"Danny you have to stop thinking like I'm still there! I'm not asking you to forget me. But Danny I'm gone. I'm never coming back. Take your shot at happiness. I love you both and I just want you to be happy."

"How can you know I love her. I didn't even know!" he admitted.

"Coz I know everything Danny remember?" she said cockily.

"I'll never forget you Alice. I love you."

"There's plenty of room in your heart for Missy. She'll push you away but your stubborn when you set your mind to something."

"How did I get so lucky to fall in love and marry you?" Danny asked.

"I was the lucky one Danny!"

"I never planned on falling in love again you know." Danny told her sincerely.

"I know. You two just supported each other. Leaned on each other. And once one of you fell the other was bound to follow." she told him.

"Alice this feels so bad. Hurts. I know what's coming!"

Alice swallowed thickly. "Let me go. Please." the final word was a plea.

"I don't want to. I need you near!"

"I will be. But I need to rest too. You have Melissa now. I can sleep." She leaned over and hugged him tightly. "God but I love you Daniel. I always have and always will. Don't hurt my friend though. Please. She has been through a lot. Stuff you don't know about. So be patient with her. Always know though deep down she cares. And loves you a lot."

"Don't go Alice!" he pleaded.

"I'm tired Danny." she said wearily.

He nodded sadly. "There will only ever be one Alice Trevanion. Never bettered!"

"I promise we'll see each other again one day Danny. Tell Lexi that mum loves her. Daniel and Amie and Ethan too. O Ethan, don't give up on him Danny! DON'T!" she pleaded. "That's all I can say!"

"Alice?" he asked confused. she shook her head.

"You and Missy belong together now. I wish you both a long and happy life." she kissed his mouth one final time. He engulfed her in a hug.

"I love you!" they whispered at the same time.

He awoke with tears streaming down his face. Goodbyes hurt. He knew he'd never dream of her again. Because she had gone to rest. She had relinquished her position to another.

Go kiss her Danny.

He looked around. Saw Alice's picture on his nightstand. Could have swore he saw it wink at him. Shadows. Eyes playing tricks. He picked up his picture. Touched Alice's face a final time. Then put it in the drawer.

**A/N awww alice's final goodbye to her friends awww sad :( her comment to danny was cryptic. don't give up on ethan ooooo :O**


	22. Surrender

Danny was sat thinking in his bedroom when he heard someone walking down the hallway. He heard a clatter.

He heard a mumbled. "When the hell did that get there!"

He smiled involuntarily.

"I'll get you back for that later. Your kindling!" he also heard.

He shook his head. She was a nutter!

He felt an urge and was soon out of his room and walking into the kitchen. He saw Missy muttering and shaking her head as she stirred milk in a pan.

"I usually make hot chocolate." he declared.

She jumped and spun. "Christ Danny make a noise next time eh? My nerves are shot!"

"I did!" he told her.

"Did not, you scared me!" she retorted.

"I spoke. That constitutes noise."

"Your being awkward!" she muttered and rolled her eyes.

He watched her and everything about her just felt so right to him. He was filled with a warmth, with a contentment that he hadn't felt since Alice left him.

"So, it's what you know and lo…like about me."

"Wouldn't go that far." she muttered. Poured her milk into a mug.

"Yes you would." he said cockily. "Admit it you like me."

"I've admitted enough thank you!" she sipped.

"I didn't admit one big thing!" he said softly.

Ok here goes! He thought.

"Danny I'm too tired to deal with word games and messing on tonight."

"I love you." he told her seriously. Looking straight into her eyes.

"What?" she shrieked.

Not the response he was expecting.

"Melissa Lynch I love you." he repeated.

"No you don't!" she relied. "That's impossible."

"Um yes I do Miss. Don't tell me who I love!"

"But you can't love me. It's a mistake!"

He shook his head. "It's not." walked towards her. "It doesn't feel like a mistake. It feels good. Feels normal. It feels right. I love you."

"Can you stop saying that?" she asked panicking. "Ok Miss wake up! Your dreaming." she muttered.

"O so you dream of me?" Danny asked smiling.

"Of course not!" she lied.

"You invaded my dreams." he caressed her face. Involuntarily she leaned into his hand. His soft touch soothed her. Her eyes closed.

"Danny." she whispered. "Don't." it didn't sound too convincing.

"Don't what? Do this?" he lowered his head and caught her lips in a kiss.

Missy stopped breathing at the contact. Then inhaled and was filled with the spicy tangy scent and taste of Danny. She stopped thinking and just felt. All she could feel at that moment was she wanted to be closer to Danny.

"Before this goes any further tell me how you feel Melissa. Admit it."

She had always hated being called Melissa. But the way Danny said it. The way he pronounced the syllables in his soft husky tenor. It wasn't a bad name.

"Tell me Melissa!" he coaxed.

Missy looked in his eyes. And it hit her like the force of a lightning bolt. She loved him. Had been half way in love with him for years but hadn't acknowledged it simply because he was Alice's husband and she would never have done that to her best friend.

"I love you too Danny," she said simply. Not a trace of uncertainty in her tone.

He smiled and pulled her closer. Kissed her with more heat and passion then he had ever showed her before. "Tell me now if you what this to stop. I'm giving you a chance to stop this."

"I don't ever want you to stop Danny. Ever!" she replied.

They were in a bedroom in no time. They had no idea who's. They were both too wrapped her in each other. Emotions swirled in and around them charged the air so it crackled.

Danny never wanted it to end. "I love you Melissa." he murmured. Then he showed her how much.

(X)

They lay wrapped up in each others arms afterward. They were both silent. Caught up in their own private thoughts. Each wondering whether the other way having regrets and considering recriminations.

"Did you mean it?" Missy finally asked.

"What?" he asked.

"What you said."

"Miss," he told her patiently. "I have only said those 3 words to 2 people in my entire life. I don't give those words lightly. When I told you I love you I gave my heart to you." he pushed her hair behind her ear and smiled at her.

"O." was the only response she could think of.

"Did you mean it?" he asked worried. It sounded like she was having second thoughts.

"I think so." she told him softly.

"You think so?" he squeaked.

"I don't think I've ever been in love before. What I felt for other boyfriends partners whatever pales in comparison to what I feel for you!"

"Good." he rubbed her arm softly.

"Where do we go from here?" she asked.

"Well I'll let you decide how, where and what happens."

"The kids…." she started.

"The kids will be fine Miss. I know they will!" he tried to persuade her but the worry didn't leave her eyes.

"And us?" she asked.

He smiled. "We love each other. that's enough, for now."

She frowned. "That sounds ominous."

"Don't worry Miss, it's not."

"Where do you see us going Danny?"

"I dunno, the whole way maybe." he admitted.

"What as in the dreaded M word? I dunno Danny." she said honestly.

"What about the K word?" he asked. He'd seen the way she looked at Zoey.

"That IS a problem Danny. Since spending time with Zoey I have been thinking that maybe I want one of my own."

"O" he whispered.

"Yeah. O"

He pondered her words. "I thought I was over with the nappies, babies bit to be honest."

"Well it's a good thing I'm on the pill or we'd be having problems coz you Mr Trevanion didn't wear a condom!"

"Look Miss if you really want a child…"

"It's ok Danny. Really."

"No because your 40 now and it'll be harder for us. If you really want a child really have your heart set. Then I'll do it."

"Really?" she asked in disbelief.

"Hey I've got 4. One more won't make no difference."

"Shauna isn't the only one with twins in her family."

"Twins? The deals off!"

"Yeah my mum is a twin. And my sister Ashley had twins. A boy and a girl." she got all bleary eyes at the thought of her baby niece and nephew.

"Why couldn't I have felt like this 10 years ago?" she asked.

"Coz I was taken." he laughed.

"We'd better get some sleep." she suggested.

"I have other things I'd rather be doing."

Like?" she asked.

He wiggled his eyebrows.

**A/N ok miss and danny r finally together but already they have different expectations in the relationship. he is considering marriage and she doesn't like marriage. she wants a kid and he's dubious coz he thought he was ova with the nappies babies bit. i can see this being a strained relationship. watch this space! **


	23. Day Off?

Ethan and Lexi lay snuggled up in bed together. Lexi turned over and was suddenly awake. She removed his arms from her waist. "What time did you get home?" she asked coldly.

He opened one bleary eye. "Huh?" he asked.

"I was still awake at 1 and you weren't in!" she fumed.

"I was out with the guys." he yawned.

"You were out with Victoria." she said icily.

"She went home. I saw a couple of guys from work. Stayed out."

"Till 1?" she questioned.

"Yeah." he rolled towards her. Ran his finger down her cheek and pressed a kiss to her lips. Tried to deepen it. She pulled away.

"Mmmm Lexi." he murmured. "Don't resist me."

"Ethan!" she said exasperated.

"I want another baby with you. Now!"

"What?"

"Have another baby with me." he told her smiling.

"I am pissed and you tell me you want another baby."

"Your so gorgeous when your angry!" he said seriously. "C'mon lets make a baby."

He pressed kisses to her neck. She felt tingles. His mouth moved up slowly to her mouth. His hand went to slid down the straps on her top. He felt no resistance. He kissed her slow and long and deep. Time to make a baby.

(X)

They awoke a few hours later when Zoey cried over her baby monitor. Ethan yawned and stretched. "I got her." he kissed Lexi. "You stay in bed."

"Your not off the hook." she warned.

"You love me remember."

She rolled her eyes. He pulled on some shorts. Left himself shirtless. Walked into their daughters room.

"Da da ba ba."

"Does my Zo Zo want a bottle? C'mon then we'll get you some cow juice huh?" she snuggled into his chest.

After changing her nappy he sat her in her high chair. "Will you do daddy a favour baby? Tell mummy that you need daddy here when you grow up so she can't kill me! And tell her you really want a little brother so she doesn't go really mad at me huh." he handed her some biscotti. "We got a deal?"

His daughter smiled her mothers grin at him. God she is so beautiful!

"Chocolate biscotti for breakfast Ethan?" Lexi muttered walking into the kitchen. Pressed a kiss to Zoey's head.

"I'm making her some porridge. It's only a little bit."

"I heard what you said to her!" Lexi looked at him.

"She does need her daddy around while she grows up!" he said seriously. His grin gave him away.

"And the little brother bit?"

"I want a baby honey."

"I've just went back to work full time Ethan."

"I know."

"Why don't we just go with it? We'll just relax and have fun." pressed a kiss to her hand and gave her a secret smile he kept just for her. "If we make a baby good but if we don't fine."

"Ethan. You went on a date with another woman yesterday!"

"She bought me! I asked you to buy me!"

"I tried!" she exclaimed.

"She did pay a stupid amount for me!" he conceded.

"Well have a baby with her!" Lexi told him heatedly.

"I don't love her. I love you. You're the only one I have ever loved. The only one I ever will love. For the rest of my life!"

She crossed her arms.

"Aww your so cute when your jealous." he told her stirring Zoey's porridge.

"I'm not jealous. We aren't exclusive. I'm going out with Cam tomorrow."

"Your not?" he squeaked in shock.

"I am."

"I HAD to go out with her!" he protested.

He fed Zoey her porridge. "We'll talk later!" he fumed. "Open wide for daddy Zoey. And here it goes. Weeeeee."

"You at work today Eth?"

"No and lucky for Cam to coz when I see him he's dead."

"Awww your so cute when your jealous!" she parroted.

He rolled his eyes.

"Just so you know I'm not going out with Cam. I only said to to get your goat." her eye's twinkled.

"You know since we're both off today we should spend some time as a family." Ethan said making faces at their baby.

Lexi nodded.

"I was about to suggest the zoo but since we live on a game reserve that might be a little anti climatic for her!"

Lexi laughed.

"We could just have the day together. Me you and Zoey. Talk about stuff." he asked softly.

"That does sound good. We don't spend time together anymore." she walked beside him and he put her arms around her waist as she stood beside him.

"Plus after today I've got 4 long days after this." he said sadly.

She pulled him to standing and pressed a kiss to his mouth. "We'll pop in and see dad then go for a picnic."

"Definitely ." he said and pressed a kiss to her mouth in reply.

(X)

Danny rolled over. Found his bed empty. He frowned. Where was missy?

He walked into the kitchen. Missy stood there in shorts and a t-shirt. Hair damp and curling in damp tendrils around her face. He walked up behind her. Put his arm around her waist and pressed a kiss to her cheek. "Good morning Miss."

She spun from his grasp. Shock on her features.

"Oh my God Danny what are you doing? I thought last night we agreed…."

He paled. Damn had last night all been a dream? He was about to apologise profusely when he noticed a twinkle in her eye and she was fighting to keep a smile off her face. She lost and laughed.

"Your face!" she giggled. "God your too easy!"

He nodded. "I think I need revenge."

"No Danny you don't." she replied smiling.

"I might relent." he considered.

"What do you want?"

"A kiss."

"If I must." she said dramatically.

"O don't put yourself out." he said.

"Get here!" she warned.

She was in his arms and he kissed her deeply.

"Wow." they both murmured when they pulled away.

"You evoke such powerful emotions in me." she admitted. "I've never felt anything like this before."

They sat at the kitchen table in silence. He made a circle pattern on her hand with his finger.

"Tell me about you." he said. "I wanna know everything."

"Not much to know. You know my name. date of birth. My friends." she said bored.

"Other stuff. The stuff that made you this mad insane infuriatingly gorgeous but amazing woman in front of me." he told her smiling.

"Well genetics have something to do with the gorgeous bit. You need your eyes checked by the way."

He chuckled. "How was your childhood?"

She froze, "Good. Why?"

"I dunno. I know that Alice met Shauna when they were 4. They never mentioned how they met you."

"I moved from Dundee to Glasgow when I was 6. I just walked up to them on the school yard and told them that an angel had told me that they were my friends. And if they didn't be nice my angel army was gonna come and beat them up!"

Danny laughed. "How'd they take that?"

"Alice told me to bring them on!" she smiled at her hazy memory of 6 year old Alice. Eyes glittering with the light of battle.

He laughed louder. "That sure is Alice."

"Shauna was at her side tugging on her arm saying angels Alice we can't beat them! She always was so gullible. Hard as nails too though. Love her to bits my Shauna. Alice too. Ever since then it was always the three of us against the world. Until now that is. When we got older. Teenagers if a girl started on one of us she started on the 3 of us. The other 2 in the background looking menacing." she smiled. One particular incident involving Shauna when they were 12. The girl nearly passed out at the sight of Alice and Missy behind Shauna. "It killed me when I couldn't go to Bristol and gave that Sarah bitch a slap but my mum and dad were divorced and I had to go to Spain with him." she said in disgust.

"Are you not close to your dad?"

"We were when I was little. Less so when I turned 12. Then mum and dad divorced. We had a strained relationship at best." he eyes turned downcast. "It wasn't his fault he just couldn't cope with what happened to me. Couldn't deal with it. Blamed himself." it was his brother. She stopped seeing him after he blamed her for the divorce though!

Danny frowned. "What happened to you?"

"What Alice didn't tell you?" she asked shocked.

He shook his head.

"She promised me she wouldn't tell a soul. But I thought she would have at least mentioned it to you in passing."

He shook his head. "What couldn't your dad deal with?"

"Nothing it's fine." she evaded.

"It's obviously not nothing Miss." he said softly.

Missy checked her watch. "We'd better pick the kids up." she stood up.

Danny put his hand on her arm stopping her. "Missy."

"Danny don't push me. Please I can't."

He nodded. She sat back down.

"Amie needs some new clothes." he said hinting. Changing the subject.

"Really?" Missy asked.

"And I'm so rubbish at fashion." he told her pointedly.

"Is this your way of asking me?" she asked.

"Would you?" he said eagerly.

She considered it.

"I'll make it worth your while." he murmured.

"ooo that sounds promising."

"It is!" he smiled.

"Ok then I'll do it."

"Miss you're a life saver. I wasn't looking forward to shopping with a 7 year old girl."

"How about I take Daniel too? Get him some trendy stuff?"

"I knew there was a reason I loved you!" he said softly.

"Yeah I take the kids off your hands." she laughed.

"When do you wanna tell them about us Miss?"

"It's still early days. I don't want them knowing yet." she told him.

He nodded. "I'm gonna tell Lex though. She'll realise herself eventually."

She nodded. "I'll head to the township first. You know try to keep the money local. After that I'll take them to Jo'burg."

"That's a good idea." he agreed.

"And of course McDonalds after that. You can't beat McDonalds!"

He nodded.

"We'll take us slow yeah Danny."

He nodded. "Slow and easy."

"Hey enough of the easy thank you!" she said playfully. "What you up to today?"

"I have my surgery and then my soaps.""You watch soap operas?" she asked laughing.

"NO I'm kidding." he laughed. "Although I would like to know if Carlos is the father to Angela's baby. I think his twin brother Pedro is and it's gonna break poor Linda's heart coz she can't have kids you see. But apart from that. Never watch em!"

Missy laughed. He sounded so serious.

"Can I take the car when I go. I dislike the truck!"

"Yeah sure." he replied.

"Ok." she leaned over and kissed him softly.

(X)

2 and a half hours had passed. Lexi and Ethan walked into leopards den with Zoey in her dads arms.

"Dad? Miss?" she yelled.

"I'm in the bathroom Lex." Danny yelled.

"Ok."

He emerged. Hair glittering with droplets of water. He had his shirt and jeans on. He rubbed the towel over his hair. Then laid it on the chair. Lexi looked at it in disgust. Ethan smiled.

"How is my baby this morning?" he took Zoey and threw her in the air and caught her. Her laughter twinkled through him.

"Bit late for a shower dad." Lexi told him.

He tinkled Zoey under her chin. "I was operating and got covered in stomach contents. I had scrubs on but could still smell it. Urrr! Well Zoey?" he asked.

"She's great dad. We both have the day off so decided to stop in and see you."

Danny put Zoey on his hip. "The kids were at Caroline's last night. Missy is taking them shopping. The bane of my existence."

Lexi grimaced. "O yeah I was so relieved when mum took me. You took me once and I swear I needed therapy by the time he was finished Eth!"

Ethan grinned.

"How is Missy dad? She been ok? Did you take her on that date?" Lexi asked.

"No she let me off actually." he told her.

"Hey that's not fair!" Lexi declared.

"Look I need to talk to the two of you actually." he sat down in the living room. Bounced Zoey on his knee.

"Look you know I love your mother."

"Yeah." they replied.

"Wee you see. it's just…."

"We know dad." Lexi said.

"Your in love with missy." Ethan told him.

"How did you…?"

"Glaringly obvious to everyone except the two of you." Lexi said simply.

"Look your mum is still my first love you know, but at the same time that doesn't make Miss second best. O I dunno."

"Miss feels the same about you too." Lexi stated.

"How do you two know all this? I didn't even know myself till last night!"

"Well I sort of realised how Miss felt and I confronted her!" Lexi told him. "But I'm fine with you two. If you love each other and make each other happy then that's all I care about." Lexi assured him.

"Me too." Ethan agreed, his beeper beeped.

"Scuse me Duty calls." Ethan said and shot Lexi an apologetic look. He went to use the phone.

"So you and Melissa huh dad?" Lexi asked smiling.

"Yeah I would never have imagined this in a million years." he told her.

"I know me either." she agreed.

Ethan rushed back in the room. "I gotta go there's a bush fire that's heading for the township. Toby is well out of his depth. Lexi you and Zoey stay at home yeah." he kissed her quickly.

"Danny make sure you get in touch with Miss. Tell her not to take the kids anywhere near the township."

"They were stopping off there!" he panicked,

"Get on the phone tell he to get out of there!" Ethan demanded. In fireman mode. "I'm so sorry Lexi honey,"

He kissed. Zoey. "Dada loves you sweetie. Be good for mummy." he then walked from the house quickly.

Danny phoned Missy.

"Hey Miss where are you?"

"On my way to the township,"

"You on hands free?"

"Yeah." she replied.

So he couldn't tell her why not to go to the township.

"Look go straight to Jo'burg. Do it! Or better still come home if you can and avoid the township at all costs!"

Missy recognised his tone. "Ok Danny I'm right home!"

Danny exhaled. "They're on their way home."

**A/N quite alot happened in this chapter. ethan told lex he wants a bby she said no. missy doesn't wanna tell danny a big secret from her past which could come to push them furthur apart and finally a fire in the township!**


	24. Township

**This is Skillet Hero**

_A hero's not afraid to give his life_

_A hero's gonna save me just in time_

_I need a hero to save me now_

_I need a hero, save me now_

_I need a hero to save my life_

_A hero will save me just in time_

(X)

Ethan arrived at the township. Everything was in chaos.

"Right! Everyone calm down and take a couple of deep breaths I need you calm and clear headed so we don't get hurt ok!" Ethan yelled. Noticed everyone was better. Nodded "Ok everyone in your two's!" he pointed.

"You two douse the buildings as good as you can!"

"You! Get the civilians out of here and cordon off the entire area!"

He looked at Toby. "Has the electric been turned off?"

"Yes." Toby replied. Pale. This was the first time the team had to deal with a large scale fire!

"Good! Roads closed too?"

Toby nodded.

The rest of you rotate like I taught you. We need this contained and quickly!" he ran to a truck and pulled on his fireproof clothes and helmet. Radioed for more help. Grabbed a hose.

(X)

An hour later half of the township was gone. Burnt to the ground. Blackened ruins. But they were winning. It was slowly being contained.

"We're doing great everyone. Just keep going!" he yelled. He'd yelled so much he was hoarse. He had to yell couldn't be heard over the spitting fire and the hose otherwise.

Jo'burg fire station still hadn't sent their back up. Tapas had arrived though.

He threw protection at him. "Help with team three over there."

Went over to Toby. "Toby have all the building been evacuated? It's spreading down!"

"Yes I have men going through the buildings."

"Good." he wiped the sweat from his brow. "Make sure they are quick but thorough."

Ethan was winging it here. He had never had to deal with something of this magnitude before.

The fire that had engulfed the township was beginning to calm down. He controlled his hose aiming it at the base of the building. He grinned when he realised it was going out. They were gaining control. He handed the hose to Jamal and ran back and forwards pointing and gesturing. Yelling if needed. Handing out praise and thumbs up too. He grabbed hoses and fought with them. Tried to be everywhere at once. He was starting to feel better when a building exploded showering sparks. It was a wooden building and went up extremely fast.

"GET BACK!" he yelled to his people.

Put his hand to his face. "Shit!" he hissed. When he saw one of his people on the floor. He ran towards them. It was Cam and Bree. It was Bree on the floor unconscious.

"Get her to the medics Cam. I've got this mate. You ok Bree."

She nodded absently shocked and groggy. Unconscious only for a minute.

Ethan grabbed the hose started spraying the fire. It crackled like it was laughing at him. He felt anger rise at the fire goading him. Tamped it down. anger helps no one Ethan. Put it out beat it that way!

He suddenly saw a movement above him. Looked up. "Oh no!" he gasped.

"Help me we're stuck!" a young woman screamed. Then coughed.

Ethan looked around. Everyone was busy. He handed the hose back to Cam and ran to Toby. His second in command.

"Tell Tapas to co-ordinate Toby. We have civilians stuck maybe more. I'm going in get the crane over here asap. I'll try and get them out of the front door if not I'll head up. Get the crane as close as possible. There's more than one person stuck!"

"No Ethan you can't!" Toby panicked. This was out of Tapas's league he knew that now!

"I've got to Toby they are stuck!"

"But your out leader co-ordinating! Let me!"

"I can't operate the crane Toby. We're wasting time. Tell Tapas to keep them calm and together and talk to them! Tell him not to move the people I've analysed their strengths and they are exactly where they need to be. Just point them in the right direction. If he moves people they might get hurt. I know we haven't always seen eye to eye Toby but I trust you to do the right thing by the fighters ok! If the building shows any signs of instability - ANY move them away immediately ok!"

Toby nodded frowning.

Ethan grabbed oxygen and ran inside the building.

(X)

Danny and Lexi turned up. She was dressed in her paramedics uniform. She was straight over to the medics part. Missy had the kids at home. She had seen a tender exchange between her dad and Miss. He had been so worried about her and the kids. She caught sight of Ethan.

"Look at Ethan dad." she said in awe.

Danny looked and smiled in pride at his son. He was good at his job.

Ethan was pointing. Talking. Focused. He looked intense. Lexi felt so much pride he was calm and controlled in the face of a crisis.

She saw him look up and saw a look of fear pass over his face. He ran spoke to Toby. Stressed something to him. His frown getting deeper. Pointed to the building one last time. Shook his head forcefully. Grabbed some oxygen and ran….

"What's he doing?" she yelled. Uncaring that she had a job to do. Tried to run towards him. Danny grabbed her.

"He has to get out of there dad! He's ran into a burning building!" she panicked.

"He's well trained Lex. Trust him to do his job and you do yours. Tell me what to do. How to help!"

Lexi felt ill. She told her dad mechanically what to do. Her eyes never leaving the building.

C'mon Ethan!" she prayed Please get out of there now!

**A/N oh no will Ethan be ok ? I hope so coz I really like his character he's lovely. Keep reading to find out. x**


	25. Getting Out

**This song is Yellowcard believe**

_Think about the chance I never had to say_

_Thank you for giving up your life that day_

_Never fearing, only hearing voices calling out_

_Let it all go, the life that you know, just to bring us down alive_

_And you still came back for me_

_You were strong and you believed_

(X)

Ethan was inside the building. The place was black with smoke. The heat was intense. The whole of the downstairs was practically an inferno. He ran in, after a minute he couldn't see the door to run back out again. Fire was all around him. He looked quickly trying vainly to find the stairs to rescue the civilians. He ran and dodged as burning timber fell. Exhaled a huge breath as it exploded into a shower of bright red splinters beside him. He was in trouble here. This was a wooden building. Far too much fuel here to keep this fire raging! It was too hot in here too. His mind ran with accelerants and causes of back draughts. He knew he was in a 3 storey cleaners too! God all those chemicals could explode any minute and if they did he was screwed! He had a feeling he was screwed anyway to be honest! But what else could he do? Leave the people to die? Like hell! Or worse send one of his men in to die? No freaking way! He was the leader and it was his job to take care of his people and the civilians and he would get them out of here! There were no if and or buts involved!

Right Ethan focus on causes of explosions. Safety first Eth! He finally found some stairs. He grinned. He had a chance now! They were rickety but still standing. He ran up them quickly and into the room where the woman was.

"O thank you!" The woman coughed. A child of about 6 at the window.

He took off his oxygen. "Close that window!" he demanded. "If a gust of wind comes it'll kill us!" he warned

The mother slammed the window down. He handed the mother his face mask. "Alternate it between the two of you."

He ran back towards the rickety stairs. Shook his head when he saw them. Decided to try them anyway. Was just about to put his foot on the top stair when they collapsed with a shudder and a scream. Then a almighty boom below as they hit the floor. The fire below crackled happy with the extra fuel. Screw you! He thought. He'd find another way out! The floor shook beneath his feet.

"No No No!" he yelled. Then coughed.

Fire wasn't the only thing that killed. Smoke did too and he had no idea if this was toxic. He took his helmet off for a second and ran his hand through his hair thinking. Backed away from the stair ledge. The fire was creeping towards the room the mother and child were in. He ran back in there.

"Look Miss we need to head for the back stairs. My team have a crane but this floor is gonna go up on about 2 minutes so we can't wait here!"

The floor trembled beneath his feet. He ignored the surge of fear inside him. The fear that was telling him they were gonna die in this inferno! That he'd never see his little girl again. He knew what their odds of survival were if this floor collapsed. Practically zero! He put those thoughts of his mind. Focus Ethan. You're the leader and these people need you!

She nodded again. The mother picked up her child and he again thrust the mask at her.

"Deep breaths!" he told them. "You'll both be fine!"

He grabbed the mothers hand and pulled her through the building. Smoke swirled around them. Fire hissed at them. They arrived at the place the back stairs should have been there was nothing but a huge hole which led to an inferno below. He gaped. Again mind whirling trying to find a solution to this. The only thought in his head is that we are monumentally screwed! They were trapped fire coming at them from all angles. No stairs - no way of heading up! God this so wasn't good! he clenched his teeth in frustration.

The young woman stared in horror at the scene below. "Oh my God!" she whispered.

O yeah say you prayers lady! He thought. No he refused to give up! Knelt down and removed the rope from his little pack he insisted they all carried in a heat proof bag. He made a knot and looked above him for something to latch it to. He could see anything due to the blackness of the smoke. He spied the edge of a banister. He threw it up. Missed. 3 times he missed. He was beginning to lose patience with the fact that fate seemed determined to see him fall on his face.

"C'mon Dammit!" he whispered.

It finally latched and he pulled it taut. Put his weight on it. It held. He exhaled in relief.

"Look Miss if you can go up I'll carry your daughter!" he breathed.

"I'm sorry I can't!" she said terrified. Her daughter just stared at him with frightened brown eyes.

He took his spare rope. Tied her daughter to his chest. She was tight against him.

"Right you'll have to leave the oxygen." He pocketed the important stuff from his pack. Normally he'd never do this but he wasn't sure he could do this carrying the 2 of them. The less weight at the moment the better.

"Oh God!" he whispered. He had no idea if he could do this! Ok, climb on my back. Hang on as tight as you can. And one thing. Don't look down!"

She climbed on his back. He took a deep breath. Said a tiny prayer and made a sign of the cross. He wasn't necessarily religious but he needed all the help he could get! He wrapped his arms and legs around the rope and started the slow climb upwards. He felt the rope giving. His body jerked as he fell a little. NO! The little girl screamed. High pitched in absolute terror. Why was everything going wrong. He refused dammit. He refused to let this rope fall down. Like his sheer human will would keep it attached long enough. His anger spurred him on. This building wasn't going to beat him. LIKE HELL! He climbed faster. His arms burning with exertion. His chest aching with the extra weight. He was so close to the banister. Again his body lurched downwards. That was it he was pissed now. He made a lunge and grabbed the banister. Just as his fingers hit the metal the rope fell into the inferno below. It fell in a circle sort of like a last dance. God that had been too close. that could have been them!

He'd nearly cried in relief as his hands clutched the banister. They hung now in mid air. He had to somehow find the strength to heave the mother and her child over the side. He began to heave….until the young lady looked down and started to panic. Her arms slipped and she gripped his neck lightly. She was choking him felt himself slipping. A picture of Zoey and Lexi flashed in his brain. He refused to leave them. Not by this god forsaken hole anyway! He gave one more last heave with all his strength and might. They tumbled over the banister. The mother released his neck and he gasped. Gulping breathes of air. Unfortunately the air was full of smoke and he proceeded to cough and splutter. He loosed the rope which bound him to the little girl. He could feel the heat intensifying! The hotter it burned the quicker it burned. God if I don't get outta this take care of Lexi and Zoey please. He prayed.

He handed the girl to her mother. A massive explosion scared the child. A ball of fire ran up beside them. He grabbed them and turned his back. Protected them as much he could, his jacket was heat proof. The little girl screamed and ran away.

"No!" the mum bellowed. He grabbed her stopped her from following.

"Go in there. I'll get her. I promise you I'll find her. I haven't let you down yet! Open the window and show my team where you are!" he saw the crane at the window as he passed. "Get on it!" he pressed. "I promise I will find her!" He then left her and looked for the child.

Dammit! He thought as he walked through the house. Shouting for the little girl. He didn't know her name so it was. "Little girl!" he was yelling. He found her in a far room. Huddling beneath a table. Tears streaming down her little face making tracks down her cheeks. "S'kay I've got you!" he promised. He picked her up and made her a little air pocket in his jacket so she wasn't inhaling as much smoke. Carried her to room. Chided himself for his pessimism. They were getting out. They were gonna be fine. Thank God he had got to them! He walked in the room and looked at the window and his heart leapt when he realised the crane was gone. Where the hell was it? The smoke was thicker and the fire hotter than ever. He ran over and looked out of the window. He saw the crane being turned around. The floor shuddered violently beneath his feet. He looked down.

"Get them away!" Ethan yelled to Toby. "They're too close this building is gonna come down!" Pointing down and gesturing away. Toby turning the crane, he gave a thumbs up showing he understood and got on his radio. As his fighters moved away an explosion ripped thought the lower part of the building.

"Come get the girl!" he yelled. "This floor is unstable!"

The crane was inching towards the building again.

He looked at the little girl. "Look I need you to sit on this window ledge for me ok. Can you do that? You won't fall I have you!" Ethan told the child.

She nodded. He lifted her onto the window ledge. God! He thought panicked. This building was minutes away from going up completely.

The floor shuddered and screamed below him "Oh Dammit!" he yelled and grabbed the ledge as the floor disappeared beneath him.

"The floor is gone here! She's exposed." Ethan yelled holding his weight. "Come get her!"

Ethan dangled in the building. The crane slowly coming closer. Not quick enough though. A gust of wind blew and the little girl fell backwards. She screamed and he panicked. He reached and caught her arm with his hand and she dangled. As did he from one arm. He hung in mid air struggling. Dammit he was gonna fall. He couldn't stay like this long, he wasn't strong enough!

"Climb up me!" he said "I swear I won't drop you. I promise ok! Climb up me!" he said strained. The girl hesitated frozen in terror. He couldn't hold her one armed in the air forever. "C'mon kid please!" he whispered. His chest aching. He saw her swallow and she reached and grabbed his leg. He kept a tight grip on her arm.

"That's it angel!" he encouraged. For such a small kid she was being incredibly brave!

She reached his waist and still he held her wrist tightly. She reached his neck. Wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

"Thank you Mr firefighter!"

He nodded and Toby reached over and lifted the girl into the crane.

The building shook and groaned.

"Hang on 2 minutes boss!" Toby said.

"I ain't goin' nowhere." Ethan said reaching up to grab the ledge with the hand that had held the girl. He heaved a sigh of relief. Grinned in triumph. He had did it. They were safe and he was gonna be too. No one and nothing beat Ethan Bell!

His triumph was short lived however when he heard a rumble above his head. Looked up at the roof the same time as Toby did. Ethan opened his mouth to tell Toby to move the crane away before they got hurt but the sound was drowned out by a sudden crashing. Ethan dropped his head as the roof came down on top of him.

"NO!" Toby yelled. He couldn't do anything. Ethan was already gone. Lost under the rubble. The whole building began to fold in on him.

**A/N OMG Poor ethan! :'( is he alive?**


	26. Risks And Repurcussions

**Girls Aloud - In my dreams (Clubland Classix version is excellent)**

Everytime I try to fight I fall,

Without my wings I feel so small

I guess I need you baby

I guess I need you baby

Everytime I see you in my dreams

I see your face

It's haunting me

I guess I need you baby.

(X)

Lexi watched anxiously as the little girl fell. Her hand flew to her mouth. "No." she whispered. Watched for what seemed like an age. She finally saw her being lifted out of the building. She breathed in relief. They were ok. Ethan was gonna come out in a minute. She saw his head pop up from the window. Thank god he was fine! She was gonna kill him for worrying her like this!

She heard a crash like thunder. Ethan looked up. Then at Toby in horror. She saw his mouth moving but was unable to decipher what was being said. He looked scared. Shocked even. Then the roof came down. His head disappeared the roof followed.

"NO! ETHAN!" she screamed. She repeated his name over and over. Fought her dad as holding her back. She fought as hard as she could. Then collapsed onto the dirt. Looked up and saw the walls start falling inside the blackened shell. She tried to get up to run to him but her dad held her.

She didn't see the firefighters converging around the building dousing it with water. Cooling it. Her vision was blurred with tears They began to fall ans she was on the floor bawling her eyes out. Her father had her in his arms. She didn't want her dad. She wanted Ethan!

**30 Minutes Later**

All the fires were finally out. The firefighters were stood around. Lexi was arguing with Tapas.

"Look Miss I'm sorry there is no way Ethan survived that. The entire roof came down!"

Lexi grabbed his collar. "I'm warning you carry on or else!" she hissed.

The man paled.

"Your not leaving him in there you bastard. He wouldn't leave you!"

Danny heard Alice's warning reverberate in his head. Don't give up on Ethan! "Look there's still time. Just an hour please!" Danny pleaded.

Tapas looked at him and then at the cold look in Lexi's eyes. He nodded.

Lexi grabbed a jacket and gloves. Everyone was on the blackened rubble pulling debris away. Frantically searching for their leader. Everyone were stoic. Danny and Lexi were in the thick of it. She moved quickly. Tossing rocks and pieces of wood. She was a blur. Shouting his name. Telling him to hang on.

"A boot!" someone yelled.

Everyone went over and pulled at the debris.

"Careful not to disturb this beam!" Toby stressed. It had partially shielded Ethan from the worst of the debris.

As the rubble was moved a body gradually began to appear. Lexi moved faster. He was finally clear and Lexi saw him. He was sprawled on his stomach. Unmoving. Eyes closed. His face was black from soot with streaks of red. He was bleeding from his nose, mouth and head. Severe internal bleeding! Lexi knew, his suit was melted in parts due to the intense heat. He was rested across blackened pieces of wood and piles of rubble and ash. He was extremely pale underneath the blood and soot. Lexi bent over him and cried in relief when she found a weak pulse. Weak but there. His hat lay a few feet from him. "Ethan hun I've got you." she whispered.

"He's alive!" she declared.

Suddenly all the firefighters were crying softly. Lexi monitored his vitals as he was cleared enough to move him. He was lifted out of the debris. He was completely limp. Arms legs and head just hanging as he was carried out.

"Ethan you listen to me you not allowed to go anywhere ok! Zoey needs her daddy growing up remember!" she told him as he was lain on a stretcher. She went to help. Claudia and Chris were working on him he was put in the ambulance. Lexi and Danny were inside too.

"Move Claudia!" Lexi told her icily.

"Lex your too close let me do my job!"

Lexi didn't like it but backed off. Ethan was intubated. It was an invasive procedure. His eyes remained closed. Didn't make a movement or sound. She put her hands on her head.

"Lex has he…." Claudia asked.

"No." she replied quickly. "No known allergy's or reactions to any drugs!"

Claudia nodded. Filled a needle and put it to his chest. Injected something straight into his heart. His monitor beeped slowly and steadily.

Lexi yearned to scream at Claudia what to do but bit her lip. They arrived at A and E in no time. Ethan was out of the ambulance and being pushed inside on his stretcher. Lexi went to run in beside them. Her dad put his arm around her trying to stop her.

"Lex baby calm down. Take a deep breath!"

Lexi pulled from his grasp and ran in behind them. "I'm not leaving him!"

Danny exhaled. Temped down the gut wrenching devastation he felt about his son and went in after Lexi.

"Let me in. I'm warning you!" Lexi yelled.

"I've got her." Danny assured the doctor and pulled Lexi away.

"It's a good thing we know her or I would have had her removed by now!" the doctor told Danny.

Danny continued dragging her away into the relatives room.

"Let them do their job Lex! They know what they are doing."

"NO I need to help. Get off me dad!" she tried to pull from his strong grip.

He pushed her into the relatives room. "What you gonna do Lex? Get in the way and get him killed? Coz your too close to think rationally?"

"No dad I wouldn't!" she said.

"You know these people Lex. They saved your life. They'll save his too!"

Lexi crumbled. "I can't lose him dad. I need him. I love him. Our baby needs him."

Danny hugged her close. "He knows this and is fighting Lex."

"What happens if he isn't strong enough?"

Danny's eyes filled at the thought of Ethan gone. "He is strong enough Lex."

"He should never have went in that building!" she said heartbroken.

"He knew the risks Lex. He saved 2 lives by risking his own."

"What about his daughters life dad? If he dies what do I tell her. How do I go on? God I'm terrified I'm gonna lose him. I feel like I'm gonna go insane!" she said voice raised in pitch.

"Breathe Lex. That's all I can say!"

Lexi paced. And cried. Then paced again.

Danny grabbed his mobile and went outside to ring Missy,

"Danny! It's on the radio someone has been hurt. A firefighter! Are you Lex and Ethan ok?" Missy panicked.

Danny lowered his voice. "A building came down on Ethan. I heard his doctors talking as I passed. Severe internal bleeding Miss they're working hard but…"

She gasped. "Oh God No! how's Lex?"

"Cracking up. Takes all my time strength and energy keeping her in the room. She keeps wanting to jump in and help. She swore she'd stay out while I got air but I know her if left to long she'll be away so I'm heading back in!"

"Oh poor girl!"

"Look Miss. Ethan planned for this. Go in my study drawer and bring a letter which Ethan wrote. It has Lexi's and Zoey's name on it. If you can get down here will you bring it? He told me to give it to her if he ever got hurt?"

"Bless him." Missy whispered.

"He told me had didn't ever have any intention of her seeing it." he paused. "Miss I need you here. I'm losing my mind too. My son is dying!"

"I'll be there as soon as I can Danny." she promised and disconnected.

Danny walked back into the relatives room. Lexi was sat on a chair. Staring off into space.

"Dad mum wouldn't let Ethan die would she? She'd protect him make sure he was safe wouldn't she? She knows how much I love and need him. How much Zoey loves and will need him when she'd older right?"

"Your mum will be doing everything she can sweetheart. Him even surviving is a miracle in itself. Don't underestimate him Lex. He didn't give up on you. Don't give up on him!"

(X)

An hour later Danny's phone rang.

"I'm in the car park Danny. I have the kids with me."

"Lex Miss and the kids…" Danny started.

"I'm not leaving this room till I hear word on how he is!" Lexi said stubbornly.

"I'm just gonna…." he again started.

"Go on dad."

"Zoey is there too Lex."

"Give her a kiss for me dad. I need to be here."

Danny nodded.

He walked out and saw Missy stood by the car waiting. He walked straight into her arms. Hugged her tightly. She pulled back and out her hand on his cheek. Looked in his eyes. "Are you ok?"

He kissed her once softly. "Ethan…." his voice faltered and cracked.

"He's a fighter Danny!" she assured him.

He nodded. "Miss I love you." he said simply. "Don't leave me - please."

"I'm here Danny. For as long as I'm wanted." she promised.

She handed him the letter. "Here."

"Thanks." he replied.

"Go back to Lex and Ethan. Don't worry about the 3 kids. They are sorted ok."

He nodded and kissed her once again.

"I guess we don't have to tell the kids." she said and motioned her head. Amie was smiling widely and Daniel wore a look of disgust at the sight of his dad kissing someone in front of him.

"Oh god Miss. I'm sorry!" he told her.

She shook her head. "Don't worry. I'm a phone call away if you need to talk ok."

He nodded. "I got so lucky. Falling for you. Being with 2 amazing people in my life."

"Save the flattery for later. Right now your kids need you." she turned him towards the hospital.

He nodded. "I'll call!" he shouted.

"You'd better!" she warned.

Danny took the letter back to Lexi. She was pacing angrily. Tears in her eyes. Back and forwards she walked quickly. She was tightly restrained. Her face intense. Her green eyes fierce.

"Lex." Danny said.

"The doctor came in then raced back out after his beeper beeped. Before he even had time to say a word." she looked at her dad's hands. "What's that?"

"Ethan asked me to give you this if he was ever hurt."she looked at the envelope. Scared of it's contents. Her eyes turned cloudy.

Danny handed it to her. "I'm just gonna go to the bathroom or something yeah." he told her.

She nodded. Stared at the letter. Then opened it.

**A/N awww i wonder what ethan has wrote 2 lexi. at least he's alive well barely! it is never that simple in my stories tho is it? x review please**


	27. Shocks

Dear Lex and to my baby Zoey,

Obviously if your reading this then I'm hurt….or worse I could be dead. I'm sorry I'm gone. Or leaving you which ever the case may be but believe me Lexi I had to help coz people needed me. I knew what I was getting into and if I had to remake my decision I can't deny that I'd probably go in and do the same again. I love both you and Zoey more than words can ever express and this isn't about me trying to get away from you but I help people Lex. I like to think that's one of the things you love about me. I don't wanna leave either of you but if people needed me then I can't walk away and watch them suffer. Again honey I'm sorry. Tell my baby girl that daddy loves her. Tell her every single day. She is the best thing I have ever done in my entire life. Nothing will ever surpass her. The pride I feel looking at her is indescribable. It's unbelievable that I had a hand in creating a person like her. She's just too perfect! You and Zoey are my life and she is my legacy. Tell her about me please tell her that the shiniest brightest star in the sky shines down on her and she can talk to me any time she wants and I can hear her. I just can't answer right now.

Then there's you Lexi. What else can I say? I love you. Those 3 simple words say it all I love you. You're my life. My love. The air I breathe. How cheesy am I getting? This writing letters bit is so hard but I just need you and Zoey to know that I don't take the decision to help people lightly and that I love you both so much! I'm trying really hard to make this letter passable. I'm writing this hoping you never have to see it actually coz I know if you do then I'm seriously hurt or dead. It kills me the very thought of being away from you. You've been the best part of my life for 10 years. Even those 5 years in new Zealand you were never far from me. But now I know there is gonna be real physical distance between us that I may never be able to pass and it's breaking my heart. I need to be near you. You are an essential part of my being. Without you I'm a shell. You make me who I am. Without you and Zoey I'm worthless.

Take care of pour daughter Lexi knowing I'm watching over you from where I am. It was never my intention to leave the both of you but just because my body isn't there doesn't mean I'm not there. You have the best part of me right there with you. In our daughter. I love you both forever and always. Never forget my love coz my love will never forget you.

Eternally yours

Ethan x

2 pictures were inside the envelope. 2 favourites of theirs. The first had been taken when they were 14. They weren't a couple here but they are both laughing at the camera. Looking so carefree and happy. Sat beside each other. He had tried to put his arm around her shoulders and she was shoving him away good naturedly. He was making a face at her. They were in the back yard at Bristol sat on the wall. The look on their faces show how much they cared. It screamed love. An innocent love back then. The second picture was taken 2 weeks ago. Was her personal favourite. Zoey's asleep on her daddies chest thumb in mouth. Bum in the air. He was dozing. Hand softly on her back. Holding her gently so she didn't fall. She turned it over.

'You and Zoey are the two most important people in my life. I love you both forever. xEx'

She wiped the tears from her eyes. This letter broke her heart. Trust him to think of her. Trust him consider the worst to happen and make sure she had something to hold on to. She couldn't contain her emotions. Her dad returned she walked over and pulled him to her.

"Dad he's leaving me and I need him so much. I love him so much. I always have. From the day I met him. I'll never love anyone else. Tell me he won't leave me dad. Please!" she pleaded.

Danny held her in his arms as she cried inconsolably.

(X)

An hour passed and a doctor walked in. Lexi was beside him in a second.

"How is he?" she asked anxiously wringing her hands together.

The doctor exhaled. "He has severe internal bleeding. Severe burns. Severe head trauma. He survived the operation to drain his chest but he is on life support still."

"But he's alive?" Lexi asked.

"Technically." the doctor told her seriously.

Lexi frowned.

"He had no responses to stimuli. Voluntary or involuntary."

So he could he brain dead! She thought in terror.

"Of course it is still early days." the doctor told her with false optimism.

"Where is he?" Lexi asked.

"On the ward in intensive care."

"Can I see him?" she pleaded.

The doctor made a face.

"Please I need to. Please!" she begged. "I'll do anything you ask. Just let me see him!"

The doctor relented. "Only for a minute then I advise you to go home."

"Thank you so much!" she gushed.

"I'll wait here for you Lex." her dad said. Pulled out his mobile.

She nodded and followed the doctor.

They arrived at Ethan's room.

"5 minutes. I need to sign some forms when I return…"

Lex nodded and hurried in to see him.

She gasped at her first look at him. Her face turned pained. He was a state. His eyes were covered by gauze taped to his forehead. His head was bandaged tightly. The places on his face which weren't bandaged was pale and covered in grazes. She touched his cheek and he was cold. Icily cold. She pulled her hand away in shock.

"Oh Ethan honey." she whispered.

A tube was in his mouth breathing for him. She reached for his hand. That too was bandaged. He was bandaged everywhere. Tubes jumping from his arms and chest and mouth. He looked so small, so breakable lying there. Not the strong proud arrogant Ethan she knew.

"I'm here Ethan. I'm so happy you survived. Life isn't life without you. When you wake up we'll talk. About marriage and more kids and a dog or anything else you want. Coz I know that all I want is you."

She pressed a kiss to his lips. They were all cracked from the heat.

"Please Ethan I need you to take off that nasty gauze and look at him with those gorgeous brown eyes. Smile at me cockily and say was there any doubt?"

She could hear his reply in her head. 'if you wanna see my eyes look at our daughter'

"If you can't wake for me to do it for Zoey."

She heard the doctors voice.

"Look I gotta go soon just know that I love you so much and I need you. And if you leave me then I'll have you ok!" wiped a tear away.

"Come back to me Ethan please I'll do anything if you just come back to me."

"Miss Trevanion."

"Ok doctor." she replied.

Lifted his hand to her lips. Pressed a kiss to his unbandaged fingers.

"I got lucky when I met you. Even luckier when I fell for you. All my Christmases came at once when I realised you loved me back."

"Miss Trevanion really!" the doctor.

"I know." she said softly. Put his hand down tenderly.

Walked from the room back to her dad.

"How is he?" Danny asked when she walked into the relatives room.

"God dad!" she breathed emotional. "He's so full of bandages it looked like they pieced the parts of him back together. His eyes were burned so they are covered there wasn't a part of him that didn't have a mark. His gorgeous brown hair was all black and singed." her voice broke. "He's gonna die dad. He didn't even know I was there!"

Her dad hugged her. "I'm sure he did Lex."

"Dad that doctor that came in. I know him he doesn't do guess work and he knew fine well what he was warning me about. He was subtly telling me that he thinks Ethan is brain dead. He was breathing through a ventilator dad! Oh God my baby girl!"

"Lex this is Ethan we're talking about!" Danny tried to persuade her.

"Yeah dad and a building came down on top of him! He's a big man but superman would have trouble if a entire roof came down on his head!"

"Lex if your preparing yourself I want you to stop. Nothing says he won't open his eyes tomorrow."

"And nothing saying he will dad!" Lexi sat on her chair with her head in her hand. Cursing god for doing this to her, your sick old man! She fumed. She could swear she heard cackling laughter around her.

**A/N etham survived his surgery bt he mite b brain dead :( poor lex she's fallin apart :(**


	28. Mum?

Ethan walked. He was so happy and content and he didn't know why. He was weightless. Floating on a cloud he'd say. Except he was walking around a labyrinth looking for Lexi. He was just walking through it. Grinning. His life was simple. Clear. Bushes were at his sides as he walked through the winding maze. He had been with her but she had managed to take a wrong turn somewhere. Or had that been him? He laughed out loud. Who know. He was too happy to care. He'd find her no problem. He didn't mind the time alone actually. Gave him time to think about whether or not to finally make the craziness legal. He wanted, no needed her to be a Bell. like him. Like Zoey. He needed her to know he was devoted to her and marriage was the way to do it. He wanted more kids too. He wanted a Ethan junior. Or a Alex. Alex Bell had a good ring to it actually. Alex after his mum and nana. Well he supposed Alex was a little bit like Alice.

He wandered slowly. Leisurely. Taking his time. He supposed he'd have to hurry up though. Little madam got crabby if she had to wait for her tea and her favourite feeder was daddy. God he's never get over that feeling. He is a daddy. His daughter is the most important person in this whole world to him. He needed her close. And he knew he'd never EVER put her through what he went through at the hands of his so called father. She's far too important to him!

"That's good to know son." a voice said from no where.

His jaw dropped. "Mum!" he gasped. Looked around. "What?"

His mum looked young. Healthy. Full of life and vitality.

"Mum you look so….amazing." he breathed.

"You have to hurry up Ethan hurry up and get out of here!" she panicked.

"What? This is a holiday with Lex."

"Ethan. Your dying. In a coma."

He scoffed. "I'm crazy. Been out in the sun too long. Delirious."

"Dammit Ethan No! your not. Your dying. You can't die son!"

He levelled her with a look. "Lexi is here with me. With Zoey."

"Where are they then Eee Bear?"

He felt embarrassment run through him at the endearment.

"I've seen 'em."

He carried on walking. "Ethan son your heading deeper in. You can't. You need to go back the way you came!" she pleaded.

"Don't be daft mum I'm nearly at the end!"

"Yeah the end. The end of you life son. You need to turn back and go back to the start. The start represents the start of your new life. The one you can have with Alexis if you go back!"

"Lex is waiting for me at the end!" he stressed.

Linda grabbed his hands. "Ethan son listen to me!" she pleaded.

"I can't. I'm sorry mum I gotta get a move on to Lexi!"

"Dammit Ethan don't die young like I did!"

"I won't." he said dismissively.

He should have known something was odd. He spoke to his mother like it was a normal everyday thing.

She ran in front of him and stopped him again. "Ethan I didn't die for you to give up at the first hurdle like this. Think of your daughter. All the things your gonna miss. I knew you being a fireman was a mistake you always have felt the need to help people above and beyond the call of duty. To atone for sins that aren't yours. But hear me Ethan understand me you are heading towards the end of you life. How do you explain seeing me? Son please head back the way you came!"

"No mum. Lexi is waiting for me at the end and obviously I'm imagining you which isn't surprising coz I used to do it all the time when I was younger. Maybe I'm imagining you coz subconsciously I feel lonely in here?"

Granted she had never spoke back before but that was different matter!

"Son please!" she pleaded.

"I'm sorry mum but she's waiting."

He walked passed his mum. Carried on his content musings. Wandered through this maze. Took off his jacket. Boy it was getting warm in here! The sun high in the sky. He felt a bit parched too. With no wind or breeze. He thought to his mum telling him to go back. What did going back ever do? No you had to go forward with your life. Look to the future. He had to get to the end of this labyrinth. He wasn't in a coma! He scoffed. He was fine. Did he look like he was in a coma?

"No you don't. You look really good." a familiar voice answered to his silent question.

"Alice!" he declared.

"Hello son. You should listen to your mum!"

"Not you too!" he whined.

"Doesn't this seem even slightly surreal to you? It isn't normal talking to dead people."

He shrugged. "Maybe I'm having a nervous breakdown. Me and Lex have just got back together which I'm happy about but I don't see her or Zoey much coz of the fire station and I'm worried it'll split us up, and the fire station has been stressing me out! Hence out holiday!" he smiled at his logic. "She is meeting me at the end of the labyrinth though I know it."

"Ethan if you go to the end you'll die. Just like me. Just like your mum. Lexi is talking to you in the real world. Listen!" she stressed.

"Alice I haven't got time…."

"Dammit Ethan I hated it when you had this mule headed attitude on. Always in a hurry. You have to slow down! You were in a hurry with Lexi, with work and now your in a hurry to die!" she fumed.

"Sorry Alice but you've lost your mind. It was nice seeing you again. Really. It was."

He carried on walking with his content musings.

**A/N Alice and his mum trying to help bt ethan being ethan thinks he knows everything sooooooo...**


	29. Bad News

**3 Days Passed**

Lexi was sat in a chair by Ethan's side. His ventilator whooshing monotonously. He didn't move. He never moved. Never twitched. Not a millimetre in 3 days. All the tests and scans then ran on him worried her. She had read his notes covertly. No response, physical or electrical. She knew what they felt they had to do. There was no way in hell she was gonna allow it to happen! As long as Ethan was breathing then his ventilator wasn't getting turned off! Lexi didn't realise the contradiction in her statement. She stroked his hair and was again shocked at how coarse and wiry it felt instead of it's usual softness.

"When you wake up you'll have to tell me what lynx you want brought in. My personal preference is lynx click but you like the dark temptation one. Don't much like that one to be honest." she told him.

Nothing.

"Yu could do with a change of clothes too. You look too pale with that white gown on. How about we go shopping too yeah? We'll get you stuff and make you trendy. All the nurses will swoon. I'll have to warn them your mine always."

Again nothing but silence. She felt dejected.

"I'm so stupid Ethan. The last year we could have been together. Except all I did was push you away. C'mon open your eyes please. For me?"

The whoosh of the ventilator was her reply.

A doctor walked in.

"Miss Trevanion can I speak to you please?"

She nodded. "I'll be right back." she murmured to Ethan. She pressed a tender kiss to the bandage over Ethan's forehead. Then followed the doctor to his office. They sat down and he looked at her gravely.

"Look Miss Trevanion we have conducted a whole array of tests on Mr Bell. We have had no response from him. Either physical or Electrical. Voluntary or involuntary. We are extremely sorry but as next of kin we…."

"NO! He is breathing. I won't let you kill him if he's breathing!" she yelled.

"Miss Trevanion, Lexi." the doctor said softly. "I know you as a work colleague. I know you know as a paramedic that he isn't breathing. He's being ventilated. You know there's a difference."

She frowned. "But…" she put her hand to her forehead. God he couldn't be asking her what she thought he was asking her! "Look I know he isn't dead so don't try and tell me he is!" she hissed.

"Lexi would he want to live like this? You know he wouldn't!"

The doctor was right. Her chest hurt! "Look Lexi we want to discuss turning off his life support. And about organ donation."

She shot out of the chair she was sat in. "O so that's what this is about huh? The fact you want his….organs" she swallowed thickly.

"He could help a lot of people Lexi you know that!" the doctor told her calmly.

"He is gonna be ok! You aren't taking his …. NO!"

"Think about it Lex."

"NO!" she hissed. "Never!"

She left the doctors office and returned to Ethan. Looked at his body as he lay on the bed. Unresponsive. Brain dead. Those words whirled around her brain.

"Eth your not dead are you?" she whispered. "Just do anything. Blink. Twitch. Anything. Coz I know he's wrong! Move your little finger just a fraction."

Ethan stayed prone. Just like he had the last 3 days Lexi finally accepted the truth. They were right. They were keeping his body alive but his brain was gone. There was no activity in his brain and without that then your dead. She clutched his hand.

"No Ethan your not dead! I won't let you be dead ok! Just do something. Anything I'm gonna have to go back through there and tell them to turn your ventilator off." tears fell. "How am I supposed to tell them to do that to you. That they can kill you? I need you. How do I say goodbye to the person I love? The person I live for? If you love me even a tiny bit just open your eyes. Please Ethan I'm begging you here!" she was pleading tears streaming from her eyes.

Again no answer and no move from the man she adored.

Lexi knew what she had to do.

"I'm so sorry Ethan. He's right. You wouldn't want to live like this. Forgive me honey please. Not that I'll ever forgive myself!"

She walked from the room.

**A/N Awwww poor lexi. having 2 make such an awful decision :(**

**next chapter is how the family reacts will they be supportive or angry?**


	30. Stay Or Go

Ethan was continuing his wandering. Alice and his mum had disappeared. The heat was growing in intensity. He was so close to the end. A young girl and a little boy stood in front of him. The girl looked about 16 and the boy about 5.

"Hey you 2 kids lost too huh?" he asked in a friendly tone.

"No we're here to see you actually."

"Me? Why?"

"We're curious. We never met you and wanted to. Well I met you but I don't remember you."

"Who? What? Do I know you?"

She nodded. "He is Thomas and I am Lauren. Thomas and Lauren Bell."

Ethan felt shock freeze his body. He stared at the boy. Saw himself in the shape of the eyes and face. He had green eyes and dirty blond hair like Danny and Lexi.

NO WAY! He thought.

He looked at Lauren. "Wow you look like mum!" he told her. "C'mere Thomas." hw said softly.

The boy clutched Lauren's hand tighter. Ethan knelt down. Looked at him. Thomas hid his face in Lauren's leg.

"It's ok Thomas." Lauren told him. She bent down and whispered in his ear. The boy looked at Ethan. Toddled over.

"Hey little man." Ethan said.

"Hello." Thomas said shyly.

Ethan looked at him. Wow he didn't half look like Lexi and Danny. Wait till Lex saw…. Wait a minute. He began realising what was going on. His mum, Alice, Lauren and now a child that had never been born. What the freaking hell is going on? He thought panicked.

"Are you my daddy?" the boy asked.

"Yes I am." he said honestly.

"Where's my mum?"

"She's not here. Not yet."

Thomas nodded.

"Lauren and nanny Linda and nanny Alice take good care of me. But make me go to bed early!" he grumbled.

"Nanny Linda and nanny Alice made me go to bed early too!" he said in sympathy.

"Are you coming to stay with me forever and ever?"

"No I'm sorry son but I'm not."

"You gonna stay and look after mummy and Zoey?"

"Yeah. I'm gonna go and take care of them really well."

He picked his son up and hugged him. Hugged Lauren too.

"So the squirt is all grown up?" he asked while hugging her.

"Yeah I have. Please Ethan go home. If you don't listen to mum or Alice listen to me and Thomas!"

"How did he get the name Thomas?"

"Me and mum named him. One day this baby just appeared! See mum had en keeping an eye on you. We had no clue Lexi was pregnant. She almost burst a blood vessel when she realised you had fathered a child at 18. We knew he was yours coz he was the spit of you when he was born. I see his mum in him now. Go back to Lexi. She a lovely girl and she's falling apart without you."

A flash fire appeared and burnt down the whole of the labyrinth. He pulled Lauren and Thomas close and protected them. A gate appeared from underneath the ground and he was stood on one side with his mum, Alice Lauren and Thomas. Lexi was on the other. The gate swung open with a creak.

"Lexi!" he yelled. "Come meet Thomas." Forgetting what he had realised.

"Bring him here." Lexi replied. Her voice sounded different.

"Ethan don't listen." Alice and his mother stood on wither side of him. "That isn't Lexi don't make our mistakes!"

"Don't be daft Alice. That's Lex." he told her.

"Ethan that isn't Lex! That is death disguised as something you want. Death wants you and will do anything to take you. If you walk through that gate then you die and 'Lexi'' disappears!" his mum warned.

"It was Danny for me Ethan." Alice warned.

"And Lauren for me son." his mum told him.

"It was my teddy bear." Lauren said simply.

He put his son on the floor looking between his family. He had no idea what to do!

**A/N so sorry about the short chapters here but when I put them together they just didn't flow so I separated them. i am also sorry coz somehow my coma's r always a metphor. Like this is almost the end of ethans life anyways b4 i start 2 ramble i think alot in metaphors actually which isn't always good with my stories. oh well :D x review please**


	31. Ba Bye Daddy

**Rascal Flatts Why**

_Now in my mind I keep you frozen as a seventeen year old_

_Roundin' third to score the winning run_

_You always played with passion no matter what the game_

_When you took the stage, you shined just like the sun_

(X)

Lexi had spoke to Ethan's doctor. The she phoned her dad and told him the decisions which had been made. The hardest decision she'd ever had to make in her life. This is the man she loved. The father of her daughter and she had just agreed to kill him. God she was killing her babies daddy, Amie and Daniel had been told about Ethan being in hospital. Her dad and Missy walked through some double doors and towards her. They were holding hands. Her dad looked like he was in physical pain. The kids walked in front of them.

"Dad you and Miss go through and I'll talk to Amie and Daniel." she took Zoey from Missy's other arm and inhaled her sweet baby scent. She hugged her close.

Her dad and Miss walked into Ethan's room solemnly.

"Is Ethan getting better Lexi?" Amie asked.

"Not really Ames. He was hurt really bad when he helped those people and he is getting help with his breathing. The doctors are gonna see if he can breathe on his own now."

"And if he can't?" Amie asked scared.

"Then he'll go see mum in heaven."

"You can't let them take away the help then Lexi." Daniel said seriously.

"Daniel your too young to fully understand." Lexi said softly.

"Not too young to understand the doctors are gonna kill him!" Daniel said angrily.

Amie gasped and her eyes filled. "Doctors are supposed to help!" she whispered.

"They do help Ames." Lexi said and hugged her. "Daniel this was my choice." she added.

"So your gonna kill him?" he stood up and startled Zoey whose lower lip trembled. Lexi rubbed her back and murmured to her.

"Daniel I'm not making this decision lightly. Your too young to understand. I need to do what's best for Ethan!"

"So your gonna kill him?" he snarled.

Lexi's eyes filled. "Daniel this is hard enough. I don't wanna do this!"

He sat back down and crossed his arms. "Killer!" he hissed.

She flinched like he physically hit her.

She cleared her throat. "I brought you here to say anything you want to say before he dies."

Daniel sat up straight and looked at her. "I'm gonna tell him I wish he never met you or loved you. Who says you decide if he dies?"

"I'm sorry Daniel but you'll understand one day." she stood up.

(X)

Danny and Missy were stood next to Ethan as he lay there. His chest moving slightly with the air being forced into his body.

"I'm here again. I was here with Lexi and before that Alice years ago. Now my son!" he whispered.

Missy squeezed his hand. "He's a fighter Danny."

"They're turning off his life support Missy."

"I think you and Lex are giving up far too easily. Underestimating him!"

Danny felt annoyance rise. "We know him better than you." he pulled his hand from hers.

"And I think your giving up on him far too easily." she said calmly. "Your not gonna die are you Ethan?" she asked him.

He ignored her. "Look Ethan I guess I wanna tell that I over you and I'm proud of you. That I'll never forget you and neither will your daughter either. We'll make sure of it." he patted his bandaged hand. "Miss your turn."

"Right Ethan I'm gonna tell you to ignore that goodbye you just heard coz I know you aren't going anywhere. I bet you 100 rand you wake up. If you don't reply then your agreeing."

There was silence in the room.

"Ok matey you owe me 100 rand when you wake up!"

"Miss you've got a chance to say goodbye take it!" Danny hissed/

"You know Danny your all so pessimistic. Got a drama queen hang up. Why say goodbye to someone who isn't going anywhere?" she asked confidently.

"And you hide behind humour all the time. Wasting your chance to say goodbye by messing on!" he hissed. "Say goodbye properly for gods sake!"

"Danny your tone is annoying me!" she said heatedly. "Don't talk down to me in that manner!"

"I wouldn't have to talk down to you if you'd act normally. He's dying!"

"He isn't dying. I won't join in the family tragedy. There isn't gonna be one! He is gonna be fine!" she repeated.

"Right get out of here. Your not family!" he fumed.

Her eyes narrowed in his assessment of her. "Obviously not. Goodbye Danny!" she walked out passed Lexi and out of the hospital.

He stood by Ethan's bed as Lexi and the kids walked in.

"What's up with Miss?" Lexi asked.

"She's being stupid." he replied.

Lexi frowned.

Daniel glared at her. "She's killing him dad!"

Danny saw his daughters eyes close at that statement. Knew that this was hurting her badly.

"Stop her dad!" He asked.

"Look the doctors have said he isn't going to wake up. The machine is the only thing that is helping him. If the machine wasn't here he'd already be gone. Do you understand son?"

"The machine is here so use it!" Daniel told him rationally.

"Daniel he'll be like this forever. He'll never wake up. It isn't fair. This machine could be used for someone who will get better!"

Daniel's eyes turned cloudy and he nodded. Turned to Ethan.

"Goodbye Ethan. You're the best big brother ever and you helped me a lot with my anger and stuff. I'll keep trying. I promise. Thank you."

Short sweet and to the point.

"That was really good Daniel." Lexi told him. Holding her daughter tightly.

Amie looked at Ethan. "I bet your going to make sure mum is ok huh? I wish you wouldn't but I know that you only wanna make sure mum is being taken care of really well. Tell mum I love her. I love you too Ethan loads and loads." she patted his face. "Don't take no rubbish from the angels ok. Mum'll take care of you so don't worry ok." she said softly.

Lexi swallowed the lump in her throat at Amie's words. "That was really nice Amie." she was all choked up. She breathed in slowly.

"Hey kids we'll go get a drink yeah. Let Zoey say goodbye to her daddy."

"But daddy Zoey can't talk" Amie the pragmatic one said

"I didn't mean literally say goodbye. But Lexi can do stuff for Zoey. Like a physical goodbye you know?"

Amie nodded solemnly. "C'mon then Zoey needs to physically say goodbye."

Danny watched her walk out. He was so logical. So much like her mum.

Soon Lexi and Zoey were in the room. She was reminded of a verse from a rascal flatts song. It broke her heart

**I can hear him say I love you like it was yesterday **

**And I can see it written on his face that he had never felt this way **

**One day I thought I'd see her with her daddy by her side **

**And violins would play here comes the bride **

**(-)**

**Here comes goodbye, here comes the last time **

**Here comes the start of every sleepless night **

**The first of every tear I'm gonna cry **

**Here comes the pain, **

**Here comes me wishing things had never changed **

**And he was right here in my arms tonight, but here comes goodbye **

She swallowed thickly. "Right Zo Zo can you say ba bye for mummy?"

Zoey played with a button on her shirt.

So she wasn't gonna do it. She caressed her daughters head. Had an idea. Sat Zoey down on her daddy's chest. Put Zoey's hands on Ethan's face and ran them down it softly.

"That is daddies face baby remember it."

She held Zoey with one hand and grabbed Ethan's hand with her other hand. Ran his hand from Zoey head down her cheek and face.

"Remember your daddies soft hands baby."

She laid Zoey down on top of him for a second and put Ethan's arm around her. Held it off her slightly but made it so there was contact. Zoey's closed her eyes content for a second.

"This is daddies hug. His warm loving hug. Never forget your daddies hug baby. Never forget he loves you Zo."

Tears squeezed from her eyes. "Never forget your daddy baby!"

"Ba bye da da." she said and Lexi lifted her off him.

"That's right Zoey. Say goodbye to your daddy who loves you! Your baby girl loves you Ethan. She really does."

(X)

Lexi was taking deep calming breathes as she walked from Ethan's room. She can't believe she had her year old daughter saying goodbye to her daddy. If this was a nightmare she so better be waking up soon coz at this rate she was gonna crack up! Lost in thought she walked into a young woman and a younger girl. Lexi didn't notice them.

"Um sorry." she mumbled as she tried to pass.

"Miss is this Ethan bell's room?" the woman asked softly.

Lexi's head snapped up. "Yes. Why?"

"Well he saved me and my daughter and we came to thank him. We went to the fire station and they said he was here and his name. Is he awake?" she asked quickly. Almost a plea.

Lexi looked at the little girl. "Look it might be best if you didn't take her in there." she lowered her voice. "He's not in the best shape."

"Oh no! He isn't…"

"No. but he hasn't got much longer left. Life support." she elaborated.

"Oh my god I'm, so sorry!" the woman said.

"He knew what he was doing. He knew the risks." Lexi told her.

"Is she his daughter?"

Lexi nodded. "She is."

Lexi saw how the young woman was wracked with guilt.

"She's a lucky little girl to have him."

"Yes she was." Lexi replied.

"Before he's gone tell him thank you. From me and my daughter. I don't know what I would have done if I lost her. I'm sorry to you and your daughter too. What your about to lose."

"Yeah I am too. Goodbye." Lexi said escaping. She needed to get away and compose herself.

The mother and child left.

As Lexi walked to the car park Lexi could help but feel resentful. They lived. Walked away fine and Ethan was about to die. How freaking unfair is that? Why did he have to die?

'Lexi don't you dare blame them. I knew full well what I was doing. I am trained to do it and went in there with my eyes open' Ethan voice echoed in her head.

She reached her dad at the car. Settled Zoey in her car seat. "Now Zo Zo you be real good for granddad and uncle Daniel and auntie Amie ok."

"Mik." she said to her mum.

"You got her a drink dad?"

Danny produced a bottle of milk from a bottle cooler.

"Mik!" Zoey clapped when she saw her bottle.

Lexi kissed her head. Grateful her child had no idea what was going on.

**A/N awww this just keps getting worse 4 poor lex. first daniel goes mad and then she had zoey sayin goodbye and now she saw the people ethan saved. :(**

**and as a side note danny and missy well they argued will they make up afta what he said. who knows missy has hangs ups about people mentioning family remember!**


	32. Lexi's Tears

**A/N I'm trying a new thing. Reality and Ethan's dream together in the same chapter coz my short chapters r so crap and I wanna try something new. See if it's any good. Any feedback on if it doesn't flow or if it confuses you greatly appreciated. x**

Normal Letters = Ethan's Dream

**Bold Letters = Reality**

Ethan was stood between the people. His mind in turmoil. Go to Lexi or stay here? God he didn't know. Nothing made sense here!

"C'mon Ethan. Come to me. Please honey!" Lexi pleaded. "I miss you."

He looked at her. "Come to me." he told her.

"But Eth my legs are sore after all the walking. I'll go over after I've rested here. So c'mon hun please." she said sweetly.

He felt himself swaying towards her magnetically.

Alice laid her hand on his arm. "Don't listen to her Ethan. She's lying to you." Alice warned.

"How do I know that?" he countered.

"Why hasn't she asked about us huh? Me especially. Or Thomas who is the double of her and Danny?" Alice asked.

"Maybe I'm crazy. And you are my delusions. And she is tired so she can't come here."

"No Ethan Don't buy into her lies. Son she isn't your Lexi!"

(X)

**Lexi was sat on a chair by Ethan's bed. She held his hand while the doctors removed the tubes and wires from his body. Then turned off all the machines too.**

"**It should happen within the next hour Lexi." the doctor told her softly.**

**Lexi nodded heartbroken. Stood up and kissed Ethan's lips one final time. Without the tube in the way this time. She lingered for a second. She then turned his heart monitor on mute. Didn't want to hear the moment his heart stopped. She then wrapped her two hands around his one bandaged one. Lay them on the bed and then rested her head on them. Felt the bandages grow moist immediately.**

"**I'm sorry Ethan but you wouldn't want this life for yourself and I love you enough to let you go. I know what my dad went through with mum. He knew she was gonna die and couldn't do a thing about it. I feel that way too and it's freaking awful. Feeling so helpless while the one you love leaves you slowly. This pain Ethan it kills you. It's literally killing me honey. She closed her eyes and breathed slowly quietly.**

(X)

Ethan's chest started hurting. He clutched it. Started breathing shallowly so the sharp pain would pass but it just intensified slowly. He heard soft crying around him. He looked around at everyone but no one was speaking.

"Ethan honey please find a way. Keep breathing. I need you so much. I need you to stay with me forever. We were gonna be together forever. You're the one who makes me complete. The one who is storng when I'm crying and weak. You're the one who I love. The one who never gives up. Please don't give up now. Not when we have so much to look forward to. Please don't do this to us. I'm hurting so badly Ethan." the voice said heartbrokenly. Swallowed a sob then went silent.

"What?" he asked looking around still clutching his chest.

"That is your Lexi Ethan. Don't listen to that person at the gate. She will never be your lexi. Your lexi is the one in the real world crying, begging you not to leave her. Begging you not to die!" Alice told him quickly.

He grew breathless unable to breath properly. His face twisted.

"Decide now Ethan. Go to Lexi over there. Go to Lexi in the real world or stay here with us. Or you'll die anyway!" His mum told him softly.

Ethan fell to his knees. His mum, Alice, Lauren and Thomas disappeared. Lexi was stood across from him. Arms outstretched. Pleading with him to go over to her and she'd make him better. Her voice didn't have it's usual musical edge it sounded angry that she had to wait for him.

He went to make his way over to her. "I love you Lexi." he whispered and fell flat on his face as the breathe left his body.

(X)

**Lexi was in pieces. It had been 40 minutes since Ethan's life support had been turned off. She had left her head cushioned on their joined hands. Unwilling to look at his heart monitor seeing his heart flat line. She didn't wanna see the blatant truth. The doctor would be in soon enough to break her heart. Bringing the transplant team with him.**

"**You'll live on honey. You'll do what you always do. Save people one last time."**

**Her heard rested quietly and she thought of all the happy times she and Ethan had shared together. Trying not to think about everything she was losing at this moment. She let her silent tears fall**

(X)

Lexi was about to raise her head. She froze when she heard a squeak. Then a hefty exhale. She held her breath certain her mind was playing tricks on her. She heard a croak.

"Lexi." a hoarse voice asked. Panted a little. "Need….Lexi."

Her head shot up. "oh God Ethan!" she asked incredulous. Hope filling her body. "You're here? Your awake?"

Ethan still had the cotton wool over his eyes. Her tried to raise his arms to take it off. He couldn't. His arms felt heavy.

"Ethan honey I'm here." she said softly and placed his hand in hers. He squeezed it.

"What…Where am I?" he breathed a little. "Lex…why can't I see?" his voice was shaky and croaky.

"I'm gonna get a doctor Ethan ok?" she left the room was out for a second then returned and grasped his hand so he knew she was back.

"Am I hurt Lex? I do feel pain but numb too." he told her.

"Your gonna be fine now honey." she pressed a kiss to his fingers. Feeling joy that he was still with her.

The doctor walked into his room shaking his head in wonder.

**A/N Ethan isn't dead YAY! he is still with lex but is he fully ok? We shall see. any feedback appreciated :) x**


	33. Too Late

**Buckcherry - You**

_Talk to me tonight_

_Is everything alright_

_Help me understand you_

(X)

Missy sat in the house stewing. Who the hell did Danny think he was talking to like that?

Danny walked in with the kids. She ignored him. He had a sleeping Zoey ion his arms. He walked into her room. Then emerged later with the baby monitor. He so didn't wanna say word to her or he might find himself missing his head!

"Missy." he started.

"Not a word Danny. Not one!" she warned.

"You should have said goodbye properly." he told her softly.

"Dammit Danny I warned you not a word!" she stood up and threw her water in his face.

Water dripped from his face onto his shoulders. His mouth gaped. She still looked at him angrily.

"What the hell was that?" he asked icily.

"Me showing you I mean what I say!"

"That was freaking childish!" he spat.

Well guess what Danny? That's me!" she retorted.

"No one has ever threw water on me before."

"So this is when you start comparing me to Alice Danny?"

"No." he replied. "I didn't mention Alice's name."

"You didn't have to it was in your eyes!"

"I repeat no." he told her.

"Liar! I love Alice. She's my best friend. And I know she's a big part of your life. I respect that and I respect the love you shared with her but comparisons between us aren't fair. I love you but I'll never be good enough in your eyes will I? I'll never truly be family to you." she said sadly.

He went around and put his hands on her shoulders gently. "I didn't mean…."

She took a step back. "Soft soaping me won't work either. A few nice words don't just erase nasty ones. Saying lovely things doesn't make things right! No way! Not when you hurt people it doesn't!"

Her brown eyes were glittering with anger. Danny had never seen her like this before. Usually she was so laid back but it was obvious he had hurt her big time.

"I'm always gonna be second best to you Danny. I know that now. I'm sorry but I deserve to be someone's first."

"Your not…"

"So you didn't just compare me to Alice saying she never threw water on you before?"

He was quiet.

"Thank you." she told him.

"Your not second best to me Miss. Alice isn't second best to you either. I love you both in different ways. I loved and still love Alice in ways I'll never love you. But in the same way I love you in ways I'll never love her."

He saw Missy softening.

"Look whoever I got with after Alice died there was always gonna be a second when I think Alice didn't do this or that. It isn't just coz it is you. She was my first love. I loved her for 30 years. If I do think it it doesn't mean I love you less or make my love for you any less real."

Missy paused lost in thought.

"Shauna was right." Missy said simply after a while. Danny looked at her confused. "She said you'd break my heart. I'm going home Danny. I can't have a relationship with you."

He frowned. "No I want you to stay!"

"Well I don't wanna stay."

Danny grabbed her hand and held it tightly.

"Let me go Danny."

"No I won't. I love you. I was warned you'd try to leave. Push me away."

"I can't Danny. I just can't!"

"Can't what?" he asked.

She was silent. She had no idea she just felt inside she couldn't stay. She had to get away.

"Your scared. I know it. Your scared because you think by getting close to someone you leave yourself open to hurt. And there is a big hurt at the bottom of your soul which is the reason why you haven't settled down yet. You told me you don't like to settle in one place. Feel the need to travel. You don't wanna be tied down to anyone or anything!"

"Your wrong!" Missy said angrily.

"Andy!" he told her.

She paled.

"Is he an ex boyfriend who got his jollies hitting you. I'd never do that to you Miss I swear!"

"He's no one!" she said icily. Her eyes were cold and hard.

"Miss you can tell me. You don't have to be scared."

"He's no one!" she repeated angrily.

"If he's no one then why are you losing your temper?" Danny asked calmly.

"Coz you make me angry!"

"Not me Miss. What he did makes you angry."

"Of course it does!" she yelled without thinking.

"So he did do something to you?" he asked.

"No." she replied.

"You just said he did Miss."

She grabbed her head. "Your talking in circles confusing me. Stop it!"

Missy was really distressed so he was quiet. Refilled her glass of water and sat her down at the table. Her brown eyes which usually sparkled were pain filled. She was breathing heavily. Her forehead rested on her hand and she was troubled.

"I'll find him and hurt him if that's what you want Miss." he told her seriously. Whoever put that look on her face deserved a pasting!

"He's dead!" she said angrily. "Hung himself in his cell coz I aborted his child! He left a note couldn't live without us." she said in disgust.

So he was your boyfriend if you were pregnant?"

"Not quite." she said coldly.

Danny was confused.

"I was 12 and he was my uncle!" she said defiantly. Looked at his face daring him to criticize her.

"Miss." he told her gently.

She stood up jerkily. "Don't start with the oh Miss I'm so sorry crap! I don't want sympathy Danny. You pushed me into this. I didn't want you knowing it. Does it help you in any way? NO! what good does it do me or anyone? None at all. All it means is that I'm relieving it again! The first time was enough but no YOU had to push and cajole and confuse me. You just couldn't leave it alone!"

"Is that why you and your dad aren't close?"

Missy sat back down her rant over. She exhaled. "Yeah. He was dad's younger brother. Much younger. By about 12 years. He was born really late in my grandparents life. He shouldn't have happened really. Nan had problems after dad was born. Complications. Andy always got what he wanted. He never got told no. He decided he wanted me. Dad never couldn't really understand why he was so obsessed with me. He was sickened by it. Mum thinks it's coz I look like Nan. She died when Andy was only 12 and he was inconsolable."

Missy wrapped her arms around herself without thinking.

"Miss." Danny started again.

"Danny I don't wanna hear anything you have to say ok. I just wanna forget it happened." she told him quietly.

"Missy you've let it dictate your life for so long. Whatever your doing isn't working. Your alone with no kids."

"By choice danny. I've had marriage proposals." she said angrily.

"And you've turned them down. Not because you didn't love the men your with. But because you start to feel trapped and you won't allow any man to have control over you."

She looked up at him. "Of course I've got control issues. He used to play lord and master games. I threatened to tell my mum and he told me that he'd kidnap my younger sister. I was completely powerless and he knew it. He got off on it! I had no control and he was starting to convince me that I was in love with him, so of course I have issues with love. I think that's one of the reasons I fell for you. See subconsciously it was safe to love you coz you were always unattainable to me. My freaking subconscious mind wants to go jump off a cliff!" she muttered.

He nodded.

"It went on for 3 months. He'd been grooming me for months before that though. He used to visit at first and would ask about all of us. Then he began to ask about me specifically. I remember the first time he saw me. I should have known he was a weirdo from the off. I had been out with Alice and Shauna and we'd been running about. I walked in all red and flushed and I walked into the kitchen with my shorts and t-shirt on and he nearly fell off his chair. Then he was like wow you've got big. And your pretty too. He was my uncle so I was like yeah ok. Dismissive you know. Mum was like be nice to your uncle Andy. Mum had to go to the shop and so Andy asked me to sit with him. I didn't want to Alice and Shauna were waiting for me but he was my uncle so I agreed. He asked daft questions about school and my friends. Then about boys. What I liked. Didn't like.

He went home and I thought it'd be the last I saw of him but it wasn't. He used to take us, me and my siblings on trips but then they tapered off to just me. He once took me to the zoo which I was secretly happy about coz a boy I liked was there. Andy held my hand. I thought it was so I wouldn't get lost and tried to pull it away but he held tight. I felt stupid and uncomfortable but he insisted. I saw the boy I liked there and he saw us. Andy looked really happy and muttered got rid of him! He had heard me talking to Alice about the boy being at the zoo. He hugged me too really tightly. His hands…." she felt bile rise. "His hands would move but I thought it was an accident. See I was only 11 and had only just noticed boys. My mum and dad were oblivious. They were having a rough time anyway. They used to go to couples counselling and they started having a night alone together once a week. You know to have a drink together and try to patch stuff up. He made it so we were alone one night when they went out."

Missy's eyes closed and her face turned ill.

"I didn't wanna be alone with him. He really creeped me out. He wouldn't let me leave. I was trapped. He tried to be nice after. Not before or during. He got off on my fear. My tears. He was sick!" she fumed in disgust turning her sick sad feeling into anger.

"I wish he was alive so I could kill him!" Danny told her his voice deadly.

"Why couldn't he leave me alone? He messed me up!"

Danny wasn't sure whether or not to touch her. He walked to the other side of the table where she sat and sat on the chair beside her, he reached his arm and laid it across her shoulder. She leaned in and put her head on his shoulder.

"Alice helped me. He was escalating. Getting much worse. Much more frequent. At first he was always real careful not to mark me but not the last time. Anyway Alice who already knew that something was wrong with me noticed my shoulder. I had stayed at hers one night and I tried to hide it. He'd left a nasty…" she breathed. "Mark on my shoulder. It was his…God danny I can't say it."

He nodded. "That's fine." he whispered.

"Anyway she was pissed. Wanted to know how the hell I got it. I told her. Told her what he did. Told her what he said. Asked her if it was true. Was he supposed to love me like that? Was I supposed to let him do that stuff to me. She wanted to tell my mum. I begged her not to I was terrified for Ashley my sister. He threatened to kidnap her. It didn't come to a head till she found him in my room. He was just about to - you know. She made sure I told my mum and dad. Her mum was with us. Charlotte was lovely. So kind and supportive when my mum went into shock. She really did to. My dad immediately put his fist though the kitchen door. He scared me see dad wasn't usually a violent man but he shouted and raged and lashed out. Then he looked at me like I had two heads. Unintentionally he made me feel disgusting. They phoned the police and I had examinations which proved what I said. As well as the fact that I was pregnant. I had never had a period before. He did that to me on my first ever time!"

Danny winced.

"He wrote to me. How the letter got out is beyond me. How he found out about the baby is beyond me. Anyway he said he loved me so much that we'd be happy. That we'd raise the baby as a family. He'd take care of us. This was my uncle talking Danny! I took an overdose of paracetamols after that. My dad told everyone I had a breakdown. Didn't want everyone knowing what happened to his innocent daughter by his sick brother. He had to save face!"

Danny out his other arm around her and she buried her face in his chest.

"Is this the first time you spoke about it out loud?" he asked.

"Yeah." she said. Head still buried in his chest.

"Stay Miss. Please. You confiding that to me is a massive step for us."

She pulled from his embrace. "NO! now that you know I have to go. You'll never see me the same again!"

"Miss I don't care. I love you."

"I'm damaged goods Danny."

"No your not. I love you Melissa. Don't talk about yourself like that. I see you the same as I always have. This woman who makes me insane but at the same time makes me love her more the more time we spend together. The only feeling I have about that is an urge to kill who dared to hurt you. My feelings for you are exactly the same."

"Danny how can anyone else like me if I don't even like myself?" she asked him seriously.

The phone rang.

"I'll be a second and get rd of whoever is on the phone, we aren't finished here!"

He walked over and picked it up. "Hello Leopards den."

"Dad it's Lexi. He's awake! Ethan's awake! And he's talking can you believe it? This is just incredible! The doctors are in with him now. Wow I'm still in shock. I can't barely contain the happiness I feel dad. He's awake!"

"How is he in himself Lex?"

"He's still abit confused and he doesn't know where he is or how he got there but he asked for me as son as he woke up. That's good right?"

"O Lexi this is amazing news!"

"I know and I had you all convinced he was gonna die."

"Not us all Lex." Danny looked towards Missy. He saw the kitchen empty. Felt his stomach drop.

"Look Lex give Ethan my love yeah. I'll be up soon."

He put the phone down and intercepted Missy as she about to leave with her suitcase. "I'm not gonna let you do this to us Miss." he again grabbed her hand

"My tickets are booked Danny. I'm going. I'm sorry but you don't have a choice if I want to end it."

"Miss you don't want to end it though you love me. And I love you. We haven't even started yet."

"My life is in Glasgow Danny. It would never have worked."

"Fine I'll move to Glasgow with you." he told her.

She frowned.

"Where you are I am Miss. I'm not giving up on you."

"Why can't you let me go Danny? just pretend these 3 weeks never happened."

"I never expected to feel this way again. You make my mind spin. You make me laugh. You make me crazy. My heart was broken and slowly with your help its mending. You make me forget that Alice is gone for a little while and I can be happy. With you. You make me realise what my kids need from me. So leave Miss. Go to Glasgow is that's where you need to be but I swear I and the kids will be right behind you!" he said passionately.

"Stay here Danny and don't talk to me again!" she told him softly.

He dropped her hand. She went to walk out.

"Running away Miss? Your throwing away a good thing!"

"No Danny I'm being the way I should be. Alone. Goodbye."

"I love you Miss. I'll be right behind you"

She looked back. "Who said I was going to Glasgow?"

"I'll find you Miss." he said stubbornly.

"How if I don't tell anyone where I am?"

He exhaled. Admitted defeat. "Just go then Miss. If your so adamant you don't want me then I won't follow you. You can go back to your empty hollow existence. We could have been really good together but if you insist on running from your problems instead of facing them then I can't convince you. Goodbye Melissa."

"Goodbye Danny." she replied quietly.

She walked outside and 5 minutes later he heard her say Jo'burg airport and then a car driving away.

**A/N bye bye miss bt have we seen the last of her? at least she confided in danny. i really like missy she's great and coz she is based a little on meeeeeeee lol actually all my characters are based a little on me awww well haha :) anyways will she b bk keep reading x**


	34. Not Again!

**Rascal Flatts - Pieces**

_I don't wanna see you anymore_

_I'm just not that strong_

_I love it when youre here_

_But i'm better when your gone_

_I'm certain that I given_

_And oh how you can take_

_There's no use in you looking _

_There's nothing left for you to break_

_Baby please release me_

_We both know that you don't need me_

_Let my heart rest in pieces._

(X)

Danny was hurt. Why fall in love huh? Love hurt you. Left you feeling desolate. He didn't want to fall for her it just happened out of the blue and now because she refused to face up to a problem it destroyed them. But she didn't know if she hadn't faced it, it would have destroyed them anyway!

Amie walked from her room.

"Daddy where's Missy. I wanna know if she'll play barbies with me."

"Amie Missy's job called. She had to go home baby. To help."

"She didn't even say goodbye daddy!" Amie said sadly.

"Amie she had to go really quick. She asked me to kiss you goodbye for her."

"When will she be back?"

"I dunno baby. Depends on how long it takes her to work out her problems."

"You miss her already don't you daddy?"

"I do baby." he admitted.

She patted his hand. "Don't worry daddy she'll be back soon. She loves you and me and everyone."

"I got real good news." he changed the subject.

"Really? What?"

"You know our Ethan. He's awake!"

"You mean he's not going away to take care of mum?"

"Nope. He's talking too!"

"Really?" she repeated eyes sparkling with excitement.

Danny nodded.

"Daniel Ethan's ok!" Amie yelled.

Daniel came out of his room frowning. "What?"

"Ethan's awake and talking and didn't die!"

"When can we see him?" Daniel asked.

"We'll go in a little bit. Zoey is still asleep and you 2 need something to eat."

"We hurry daddy." Amie told him.

"You'll take your time or you'll get a sore stomach." he told her.

Amie nodded.

He made them dinner. Turned the radio on. A bulletin started when the kids were eating.

"There has been a terrorist attack on Johannesburg airport. It is believed that a bomb exploded in the southeast terminal an hour ago. We have already 9 confirmed deaths…."

Jo'burg…Bomb…Missy!

The kids were eating, ignoring the radio.

"I'll be in the living room kids." he walked in and knelt in front of the TV.

"We have a preliminary list of unaccounted for people running across the screen." the broadcaster said.

Danny sat and read each name. his heart stopping each time he saw an M. Melissa Lynch ran across the bottom. He put his hand over his eyes but still the image of her name was imprinted onto his brain. He got up and sat onto the sofa. She was dead! He had pushed her to talk to him about what happened. He had pushed her away and now she was dead!

"Daddy." a voice asked.

He grabbed the remote and turned the TV off. Wiped his eyes and cleared his throat. "Um yeah baby."

"When are we gonna see Ethan?" Amie asked walking into the living room.

"Soon baby."

God Miss was dead was the only thought in his brain. He lost 2 people he loved with a year of each other. This one hurt badly coz it was his fault. If he hadn't pushed her away she'd still be here. He had his kids for reminders of Alice. He had a handful of memories for Missy.

"Daddy you ok?" Amie asked.

He'd had no idea Amie was still there.

"You look sad daddy." she added.

"I'm good Amie." swallowed the lump in his throat. "We'll go see Ethan in a little bit. Daddy needs air."

Danny stood on the veranda. The baby monitor attached to his belt.

God Miss I hope you didn't suffer honey he told her silently. I bet you and Alice are up there gossiping. Catching up. God Miss I love you so much and now your gone. How do I get through this without you? You were the only thing that kept me sane last time. Grief squeezed his heart. Now he was certain he had no heart left. To have someone else cruelly ripped from him. God he so couldn't deal with that!

(X)

Toby walked into the hospital. Guilt weighed him down. He saw Lexi on the phone in tears. Oh no Ethan hadn't died had he? Lexi had placed the phone down and wiped her eyes with a hanky. She saw him.

"Toby. What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I came to talk to you actually." he admitted.

"How are everyone at the they coping after such a bad fire?"

"They're all worried about Ethan actually. Especially since your dad phoned and said he was critical. Completely unresponsive."

"Toby he's…."

"Look Lex I have something to tell you." he interrupted.

"Ok." she said.

"Tapas needed his job back," he started.

"I don't understand Toby." she looked at him confused.

"Tapas didn't want Ethan to get hurt. He wanted to prove to everyone that Ethan wasn't everything he cracked up to be. That he'd crumble under pressure. That he couldn't delegate. Then Tapas would come in and save that day. Ethan was only supposed to look stupid! Tapas set a contained fire that rushed way out of control and headed towards the Township. Once the buildings started going up it was too late to stop it. The button to alert the other station had been disabled. I told Tapas where it was. I tried to tell Tapas not to do this but he was adamant that everything would be ok. With that building I pleaded with Ethan not to go in. I knew it was gonna come down. He did too I could see it in his eyes. He told me to keep our fighters clear when instability became dangerous. We had found out how he got the scar on his neck and back. I didn't really believe it…Until now."

Lexi's eyes were black with anger and her fists were clenched tightly.

"You mean you knew he started the fire that nearly killed Ethan? And you didn't stop him?"

He nodded. "He didn't want him to get hurt!"

"Hurt!" she hissed. Dragged Toby down to Ethan's room by his arm. Pushed him into the doorway. They stood.

Toby's eyes widened at the tubes and machinery around Ethan. At the extent of bandaging around him. She pulled him back away. Pushed him against the wall. Was in his face.

"I got told he was dead! Had to make the choice to turn his life support off. I had his year old daughter in there saying goodbye to her daddy. Somehow he survived and is sleeping. They're unsure of what type of long-term damage he might have physical or psychological. And you tell me you didn't wanna hurt him? You better get out of here right now before I inflict on you what he's going through!" she warned.

"I'm sorry. Tell him I'm sorry."

"Get out of here!" she said coldly. "And if I se you near him again I'll have you!"

Toby rushed away.

She calmed herself and walked back in to Ethan. She sat beside him. He lay asleep or so she thought. She held his hand.

"Who was that with you before? I smelled a mans aftershave." Ethan said softly.

"No one important." she replied.

"Your boyfriend on the side then?" he asked playfully.

She smiled and laughed a little. He put his hand on her face.

"What you doing?" she asked.

"I wanna know what your face feels like when you smile."

She smiled wider.

"I like it. It feels beautiful." he felt around with his other hand and grabbed her hand. Placed her fingers on her smile. "Does that feel beautiful to you?" he asked.

"Your adorable!" she told him.

"Well." he said modestly. "I do try."

She laughed. Put her hand on his cheek.

"Zoey's fine by the way." she told him.

"Zoey?" he asked frowning.

"Yeah Zoey."

"Who's Zoey?" he asked.

"Zoey is our daughter. She's one. She looks just like you!"

"Daughter?" he scoffed. "What you on about? We're too young to have a kid!"

"Ethan?" she asked scared.

"Got you!" he chuckled. "Like I'd forget my little girl!"

"You…argh!"

"Sorry honey I couldn't resist. I wanna see my baby girl really badly. Well not see literally obviously." he motioned to his eyes.

"Dad's bringing her in."

"What happened to me Lex? I'm guessing a fire. I have flashed of memory like heat and pain. And air whooshing passed me. I was scared too which in itself is weird coz I'm not scared of fire. I respect fire. Respect the damage it can cause if your careless. But I never experience fear!"

Lexi hear his tone. He sounded like he was genuinely scared. "You went in after you found out a woman and child were trapped. You headed up. The woman was out but the child was still in there. The crane had to turn around due to high winds. I saw you lift the little girl onto the ledge. You were yelling and pointing down. I assume telling Toby to move your fighters. it's good thing you did too coz an explosion would have hurt them if they hadn't moved when they did. You disappeared suddenly and then the little girl fell backwards."

He frowned. "I remember that. The floor collapsed. And the wind blew her backwards. I caught her wrist." he remembered his chest aching and the little girls terrified screams.

"I watched for what seemed like forever." Lexi carried on. "Toby lifted her out of the building. Then I saw you head pop out of the building. Just for a second. The roof came down on top of you and caused you to fall."

Ethan shook his head. "I let go. I let myself fall. if all that weight had fell on my head it would have broke my neck. Left me with massive cranial damage. No I let go. I figured I had better chance of survival"

"But you could have broke you neck or spine falling!"

"But that wasn't set in stone. I'm still here somehow."

"The fire was still burning down there Ethan."

She saw a frown crease his forehead.

"Your face is all bandaged. Along with the rest of you."

"How did I survive?"

"A beam cam down partially shielded your head and body."

"So I'm lucky then?"

"Yeah." she leaned in and pressed her lips to his. He responded the second their lips met. Kissed her back heatedly.

"Now that is worth waking up for!" he murmured.

"Ethan you have no idea how much I love you. What I had to do! How grateful I am to have this second chance with the man I adore!"

"What happened honey?"

"They recommended to me about having your life support turned off. That you wouldn't wanna live like a zombie. That you'd live on in organ donation. They just kept repeating it and I was going insane. Eventually I agreed coz I knew that you wouldn't wanna live like that so I told them to do it." her voice cracked and broke.

His hand fumbled looking for hers. "Hey I'm here aren't I? didn't I always swear I'd never leave you?" he told her. Feeling pain at what she had to go through. He could hear in her voice how the decision tore her apart.

"Hey I get my blinkers off soon." he said smiling. "They dunno if I'll have any vision or not. Trying not to push their luck I think."

"O Ethan you might be blind?" she asked.

He shrugged. "If I am I'll deal with it. You can't keep me down. I'll be happy as long as I have an image of you and our baby girl in my head."

Her face turned sentimental. "Aw Ethan you can be so sweet sometimes." she held his hand.

"How are the mother and child." he asked.

"They are both fine. They came to see you I sorta told them I had to turn your life support. And you were gonna die. See I wouldn't of told her that except that's what I was told!"

"O." he said.

"I feel really bad now coz she looked guilty. I sorta resented that she lived and you were gonna die."

"O Lex that wasn't their fault. She was young. Her daughter just a baby. Younger than Amie. I couldn't let them die." he told her softly. "Two for one. Many for few."

"Yeah Ethan but if you died it affects more than just you. What about me, dad, Amie and Daniel and most importantly your baby daughter who earlier was in here saying ba bye da da. I had to ask her to say goodbye to you. She had no idea what was going on which I thank god for!"

"Lex I'm sorry you and Zoey had to go through that but I'm a firefighter it's what I do. I help people. And if the need arises I go in burning buildings."

"Why couldn't you ask someone else to go in Ethan?"

"What? Send someone else to do a job I won't do? No freaking way! I'm not a coward!" he said angrily.

"You knew that building was gonna come down?" she stated angrily.

"Lexi…" he started.

"Did you know if the building was gonna come down?"

"I suspected it." he admitted.

"And you still went in?" she asked in disbelief. "Did me and Zoey not cross your mind at all?"

"No Lexi you didn't. I had to be focused. And if I thought of you I know I'd bottle it. When I was in there and thought I didn't have a hope in hells chance of getting out I prayed to God to keep you both safe. Then there was a chance of getting out I was relieved coz I was coming home to you." he paused for a second. "No Lex I don't regret going in there. Not at all." he answered her unspoken question.

"You can't take stupid risks with your life when you have a baby to think of!" she steamed after his admission.

"O like you did Lex? Or have you forgot you were stabbed?"

"Like you can forget that!"

"What if he'd stabbed you lower huh. You were pregnant with her. He could of killed our daughter. To preach to me about risking my life when you risked yours and hers!" he fumed.

"O it's all coming out now Ethan. How long you waited to throw that in my face huh? Since it happened? Don't hold back Ethan throw something else at me!"

"Don't turn this around onto me! You're the one being unreasonable!" he snapped.

"Well tell you what I can't live like…" she started but didn't get to finish because her dad and Zoey walked in with Daniel and Amie.

"We'll finish this later!" she said in a low tone.

God that sounded like a threat! Ethan thought.

Lexi pasted a fake smile on her face. Stood up and turned to her dad.

**A/N a few things. awwww missy :( i hate killing off characters i always feel sad :(**

**Ethan and lexi grrr y cnt they jst b happy? he's alive which is mre than they had b4! grrr**

**and finally toby and tapas. trust me this is not the end of this. it was supposed to be the end bt i had a brain wave and this story is extended sum what so there we are. more story 4 u :D enjoy and review. tell me what you think x**


	35. Visiting Ethan

**Avril Lavigne - When your gone**

_When you walk away I count the steps that you take,_

_Do you see how much I need you right now?_

_When your gone_

_The pieces of my heart are missing you_

_When your gone_

_The face I've came to know is missing too_

_When your gone_

_The words I need to hear_

_To always get me through the day_

_And make it ok_

_I miss you._

(X)

"Zoey baby come see daddy." Lexi said happily.

"Dada!" Zoey clapped.

Lexi saw Ethan smile. She sat Lexi on his knee. Put his hands on her sides.

"Zoey." he said and ran a hand down her face gently.

"She has the same shape face as you Lex." he remarked.

Lexi ignored him. "Dad where's Miss?"

Danny had no idea what to say!

"She had to go to Glasgow." Amie spoke up.

"You ok dad?" she whispered.

"Um, yeah." he replied neutrally.

"She'll come back." Lexi assured him.

Ethan was babbling away to Zoey who was giggling.

"I'm glad your still here son." Danny told Ethan.

"Me too!" Ethan said. Looking at the direction of Danny's voice.

"Ethan why do you have cotton wool on your eyes? Can't you see?" Amie asked.

"My eyes were hurt. The cotton wool is incase the bright light hurts them more. The doctor is gonna take them off later."

Ethan had blagged it there.

"Ames Ethan can't see you nodding." Lexi whispered.

"O yeah." Amie said. "Ok Ethan." she said slowly and clearly.

"Hey Ames my ears are fine. It's just my eyes." he laughed.

"Ethan did it hurt?" Daniel asked. "Were you scared?"

"Daniel!" Danny declared.

"What?" Daniel asked.

"You can't ask him stuff like that!" Danny told him.

He heard Daniel tut.

"It's ok Danny. And to answer your question Daniel yeah it did hurt, a lot. Was I scared. Hmmm I wasn't scared to die. But I was scared I'd never see my family again."

"What happened to you. They won't tell me!" Daniel complained.

"Why do you wanna know this stuff? Like what happened and if I was scared?"

"Coz I wanna be a firefighter like you when I'm older."

If Ethan could have closed his eyes he would have. He could feel the tension rolling off Lexi in waves.

"Everyone is so worried about you Ethan." Amie said. "We got flowers and phone calls at home. Loads of them. The flowers look and smell pretty."

Daniel rolled his eyes. "That's not why he's a firefighter. He helps people. Without Ethan people would die. Wouldn't they Ethan?" he asked awe in his tone.

"Not just me. There's a whole team of people who help people." he said. "I didn't get them out alone."

Daniel nodded seriously.

"Danny are you ok? You seem really quiet." Ethan remarked.

He nodded then realised. "Yeah son. I'm fine."

Ethan looked like he didn't quite believe him. He let it lie. He knew something was up. His voice was different.

"Can we turn the TV on Ethan?" Daniel asked.

"Go on Dan Dan Fireman!"

Lexi elbowed him. "Don't encourage him!" she hissed.

Sorry! Ethan mouthed with a grin.

Daniel pressed the remote. The news came on. It was still about Jo'burg airport. Danny jumped up and turned it over quickly.

Lexi stared at her dad quizzically.

Danny sat back down lost in his own morose thoughts.

(X)

It was getting late. Danny and the kids were still sat in Ethan's room. Zoey lay asleep in her daddy's arms. Ethan no longer had the bandages on his eyes although they were bleary and his vision was still blurry. As soon as the doctors took them off he had looked at Lexi and called her Danny then laughed. This had prompted loud laughter from the kids. Danny looked at his kids.

Said kids were asleep on their chairs which was surprising seeing as it was still early. Lexi had asked him about Missy again. He always evaded. It was hard thinking about her never mind talking about it yet. It hurt like a fire in his soul. He felt sick to his stomach at what she must have went through. It was probably similar to what he went through. Lexi knew he was hiding something. She wasn't stupid. He didn't wanna tell her about Missy. Didn't wanna break her heart. Missy was a good friend to her, a confidant. Danny worried how would she react. How was he supposed to tell her?

Lexi had heard about the bomb going off at the airport. She hadn't made any connections yet though. She had been guilty actually. Said she should have been there helping the wounded. They were still looking for people. He really should get in touch with Shauna. God he couldn't believe he had to do all this again. He didn't wanna go through this with someone he loved again. He put his head in his hands as he imagined Shauna's heartbroken reaction to the loss of another best friend.

"Dad what's wrong?" Lexi asked softly.

"Nothing baby." he replied.

"Where's Missy then and don't give me the crap you have Amie about her going home."

His breath caught. He held it to hold the hurt inside.

"Dad I'm worried. Tell me what's wrong. Have you and Missy broke up?"

In a way they had. He'd never see her again. His heart broke even more. "Yeah baby. She's went home." For the final time. To Alice.

"O dad I'm sorry." Lexi said sympathetically.

"Yeah me too. I loved her a lot."

"You'll work it out dad. Don't worry. She loves you."

He nodded. "I'll get the kids home. They're all tired."

He nudged Daniel and picked Amie up. They had been there all day and were shattered. Lexi put Zoey on his opposite shoulder.

Ethan picked the remote up. Pressed the wrong button. The news came on.

"The death toll for the bomb blast in Johannesburg is steadily rising. We still have missing people although they are now presumed dead. Names flashed across the screen. Lexi's eyes widened as Melissa's came on screen. Her eyes filled. She looked towards the door. Her dad was gone.

"God Ethan Missy's dead." she whispered.

"WHAT?"

"She was going home and a bomb went off in the airport. She's missing presumed dead. And dad knows!"

"Oh not again. 2 people he loves in less than a year!"

Tears fell from Lexi's eyes. "Poor Miss she must have been so scared!"

"Who our Melissa? Not her. She was probably threatening to kick the terrorists ass!" he told her completely serious. She would especially if she knew she was gonna die anyway!

"Yeah actually. I can see her as the leader of a revolt. Stirring up people to do something. And now she's gone!"

Ethan pulled himself up. It hurt but he didn't care. Pulled Lexi into his embrace and hugged her close.

"She went down fighting Lex. Remember that."

She nodded.

The door opened.

"I wondered when he was gonna leave. Ethan your awake?" a voice asked happily.

They both looked at brown twinkling eyes and a contagious grin.

"MISSY?" they both exclaimed.

(X)

Danny took the kids out to the car. He laid Zoey on the passenger seat then sat Amie inside. Pulled her belt over her. Then he placed Zoey in her car seat. Daniel climbed into the car and belted himself in. All 3 kids were sound asleep. It was silent in the car. It was weird they were asleep so early. He listened to their soft breathing. He loved his four kids so much. Zoey too. The only people who would ever have his love. He'd never fall in love again. Love just hurt too much. People love you and people leave you. God he hadn't kissed her goodbye. Now he knew how Alice felt when she hadn't kissed him goodbye. God how heartbreaking could the absence of one kiss be? He hadn't kissed her enough. Hadn't told her he loved her enough. He hadn't done anything enough coz it took him so long to get over that she was Alice's best friend. But that wasn't the only person she is. That was only small part of her. She is Melissa who messes around and teases him. She plays daft tricks just to annoy him. She keeps him guessing, he never knows what to expect. She fit him. The new him. He wasn't the same man he was when Alice was alive. Grief changes people irrevocably. She fit the new him perfectly. Like she had been made for him. She was this beautiful, amazing enchanting woman. His Melissa. And now she's gone. How on earth had he been lucky enough to fall in love with two beautiful woman was beyond him. And why they loved him back when he was the stupidest man alive was the biggest mystery of all. He missed her already. Her smile. Her laugh.

"Take care of her Alice." he whispered. "You were right. She did push me away and I let her. I wish I hadn't. I love you both. Make sure she knows that I love her. And tell her I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt her for the whole world."

He drove home.

**A/N ok so missy isn't dead. i did toy with the idea of killing her off bt i had a couple of good ideas for later in my story so i thought nope she cn live. bt u neva know 4 how long with me x **


	36. Anger and Sadness

_**Rascal flatts - It's not just me**_

_Hold me now and tell me that you do believe_  
_In a soul, a soul mate_  
_And tell me, and tell me, tell me_

_Tell me that you live for love_  
_That forever is never enough_  
_That you've waited all your life to see_  
_That you want so badly to believe_  
_Tell me that it's not just me_

(X)

"MISSY!" Ethan and Lexi both exclaimed.

"Well this is an enthusiastic welcome!" Missy declared as Lexi dived into her arms.

"How are you here?" Lexi asked incredulous.

"I drove." Miss said with a laugh. "I was gonna go sperm and egg route but you're a paramedic. Not as funny."

Ethan looked at her.

"I knew you'd be ok Ethan. All these pessimists were convinced you were gonna die. Not me." she said happily. "I knew you wouldn't let it beat you son."

"Miss a bomb went off at Jo'burg airport!" Lexi told her.

"I know evil swines. They've hurt so many innocent people. Maybe me if I….." she trailed off as she realised. "Oh no." she whispered.

"Your name has been listed as missing. Presumed dead. Dad knows."

"Oh no!" she repeated. Put her hand on her head.

"He's in bits Miss. And I have a feeling he's gonna ring Shauna."

"He can't do that! She'll go mad. She's not as strong as me and your mum. She lose her mind!" she gasped. "Look Ethan I'm so glad your ok." Kissed his cheek. "But I gotta go. You owe me a hundred rand by the way." she winked. "See you Lex. Love you both!" she hurried from the room.

"How the hell do I owe her a hundred rand?" Ethan asked Lex.

"I have no idea but thank God she's ok huh?"

"Yeah. Your poor dad!" Ethan murmured.

While Lexi and Ethan were talking Missy was in a taxi on her way to Leopards Den.

(X)

Danny sat in the house. All the kids were snuggled up in bed. Asleep. He was sat in the living room with his phone in his hand. Summoning some courage to ring the number in his hand. He took a deep breath a dialled the number. It rang. He had what he was gonna say all planned.

"Hello." Shauna said.

Whatever he was gonna say was wiped from his mind by her happy tone.

"Um, hello Shauna. It's Danny."

"O Danny, hello how is everyone? You, the kids, Miss?"

"Um, not too good right now to be honest." he told her.

"Danny what's wrong?" she asked worried.

"Look Shauna. There's been a terrorist attack on Jo'burg airport." he breathed heavily. His voice grave.

"O is that it. Thanks for getting in touch I was gonna see if me and James could come down and visit."

"Shauna." he quieted. "Look Missy," his voice broke on her name. "She was at the airport." he swallowed a sob.

He heard her gasp.

"Is…is she badly hurt?" her voice shook. He could hear the pain in her tone.

"Shauna," he quieted again.

"Oh no Danny don't tell me that. Please don't tell me she's gone too!" Shauna said heart breaking on the phone.

"I'm sorry Shauna."

Shauna was silent. Laboured breathing over the phone then,

"O God not Missy too!" her voice broke even more as her tears fell faster. "I can't believe that the two of them are gone. This is so horrible. My two best friends are gone!" she sobbed.

"I know." his tears fell too. "I love her Shauna and she's gone."

"This isn't fair Danny. To lose both of them so close."

Danny had to go. He really couldn't talk to anyone right now. "Look Shauna but I've got to go. I'll ring you back ok. This is really hard!"

"Ok Danny." her tears evident in her tone.

He disconnected the call quickly. So she couldn't hear him break down. His heart was obliterated. He thought the worst thing he'd ever go through was losing Alice. He was wrong. This hurt just as much.

He escaped to his room and may down. Closed his eyes tightly.

(X)

Missy was pissed. "You'd be quicker if you drove backwards!" she told the taxi driver.

"Do you wanna get out and walk?" he asked.

"It'd be quicker!" she retorted.

She was stuck in a traffic jam. It took over an hour to get home. Paid the driver and left her case at the bottom of the veranda. Jogged up the stairs. She walked past the phone book and saw it open on Shauna and James' number.

"Oh no!" he hasn't rung her yet has he?" she muttered.

"Danny!" she said trying not to shout too loudly in case she woke the kids up.

She knocked on his bedroom door. Waited for a reply. Got nothing. She popped her head in. saw he had a pillow bunched under his head. With his arms wrapped around it tightly. Tear tracks had made trails down his cheeks.

"Oh Danny honey." she whispered. "I'm sorry!"

His eyes were closed. He began muttering in sleep. "Miss…sorry…plane." he frowned. "hot!"

"Danny." she whispered. Knelt by the bed.

"Danny!" she said louder.

He opened his eyes. Smiled at her a slow sleep smile. "I'm dreaming." he murmured. He was looking at an angel. Who looked concerned. She was so beautiful. Cheeks flushed. Brown eyes twinkling. Her face serious. She knelt by the bed her face close to his.

"No Danny, your not. I'm here. I need to know have you rang Shauna?"

He sidled closer to her. Their faces almost touching. "Why waste a dream talking about Shauna?" he whispered. Pressed a kiss to the back of her hand. Her breath tickled his cheek.

Wow this dream is vivid. He thought. Her skin soft as velvet beneath his lips. Her warm breath tickled his cheek. He could even smell spearmint polo's.

"Dammit Danny wake up! Have you rang Shauna?" she asked sharply.

He started coming awake slowly. "Miss?" he asked breathless.

"I'm here Danny. Safe. Unscathed.

He sat up and pulled her close for a bone crushing hug. Needing to feel her in his arms. Only when he felt her arms around him did he truly begin to believe that he was awake and she was truly here!

"Aah, ribs!" she chuckled.

"Thank God. I thought I'd lost you. It almost killed me!" he said quietly.

She pulled back a little. "Did you phone Shauna?" she asked seriously.

"Oh no!" he exclaimed. "I did!"

Missy looked pained. "She's gonna have you, you know!"

He caressed her cheek. "I'm so happy your ok!"

"Focus Danny. Damage limitation time! Do I ring Shauna or do you?"

"Might be best I ring her to start with to warn her then you talk to her." he said.

"You're a brave man." she said with a smile. Handed him her phone. He scrolled through her phonebook. Pressed ring on Shauns.

Held Missy's hand as it rang. He still couldn't believe that she was here. His heart still pounded with the relief of having her near to him.

"Hello." a heartbroken voice asked.

Danny squeezed Missy's hand letting her know Shauna was speaking.

"Shauna it's Danny."

"O God what now Danny. I dunno how much more I can take so if it's bad don't tell me please!" she said voice breaking again.

O he was so dead!

"I might have been a little bit ahead of myself before. In my defence I thought it was true and you gotta know Shauna I'd never wanna hurt you. Your like a sister to me."

"What?" she asked confused.

"Someone wants to speak to you."

He handed the phone to missy.

"Hey Shauna Missy here." she said softly.

"But your dead." her voice wobbled.

"Obviously not Shauns."

"DANNY!" Shauna yelled. She was cursing and vowing vengeance.

Missy grimaced and held the phone away from her ear.

"Ow Shauna you just deafened me in one ear!" Missy declared.

"He told me you were dead!" Shauna said coldly.

"To be fair he thought I was!" Missy told her.

"It's no excuse for telling me!" she retorted.

"You'd be pissed if he didn't Shauns."

"Do you realise what I went through?" Shauna asked.

"Actually yes I got the call about Alice remember!" she said sadly.

"Yeah." Shauna said in sympathy.

"At least I came down to you and broke it to you in person too!" Missy told her.

"God Miss it hurt like hell thinking you were dead. The way you died too. I tried to imagine you kicking ass but all I could see…."

"Shauna don't think about it. I'm absolutely fine ok."

"I felt so alone though. Bereft. Your on orders. I die next. Then you!" Shauna said seriously.

"What?" Missy exclaimed.

"You heard me Miss. You die last!" Shauna repeated. As serious as ever.

"Not so I live longest? So your not alone eh?"

"Too right!" Shauna declared.

"Look it's late over here. I'll phone you tomorrow ok Shay."

"Kay Miss. Thanks for phoning straight away. And tell Daniel to sleep one eye open coz next time I see him he's dead! And of course I'm so happy you're here. I do love you Miss. I don't tell you enough but I do."

"I might help you with your mission. See you Shay I'll tell you about Ethan later. Bye mate. And I love you as well."

"Bye Miss."

Melissa disconnected. Looked at Danny grinning. "O you are so dead when she sees you!"

"I heard her war cry!"

Missy nodded.

"Why didn't you go to the airport Miss?"

She patted her hands on the bed. "I went to say goodbye to Ethan. A proper goodbye like you said. You hurt me Danny. I know the truth now though. I'm not your family." she said sadly.

"You are Miss. You are my family."

"How could you say that to me then Danny?"

He put his arm around her. And pulled her close to him. She was too upset to fight him.

"I'm so sorry Miss." he put his hand on her face and turned her cheek so she faced him. "I love you so much." he paused. "Sometimes when I'm hurt I lash out at the people I love. Especially if I think they are doing something I think is wrong. I'm not an easy person to love Miss. I'm opinionated, stubborn and just plain stupid sometimes. But I'm also loyal, warm hearted and when I say I love you it means forever!"

He sounded so sincere that Missy just melted. "Danny your wrong." she told him. "Your very easy to love."

"But I am a pain in the neck huh?" he conceded.

"Too right!" she replied smiling.

"Look can we talk about this in the morning?" he asked.

"Yeah." she said standing up.

He grabbed her hand. "Where are you going?"

"We should take this thing between us slowly!" she said seriously.

"To hell with slow. I know I love you. I know you love me. I nearly lost you today. I thought I had lost you. And all I could think about was about the things I hadn't said or done."

He pulled her don towards him so she was sat on the bed again. Kissed her softly. "We love each other Miss."

"And you hurt me today Danny. Don't push me please."

"Miss I don't wanna wait. I wanna be with you however long we have."

Missy's eyes narrowed. "You always get your way don't you?"

"Not with you." he told her. "Stay with me. Please Miss. Just so I can hold you close."

He pleaded with her with his eyes. She felt herself melting. "Ok then." she whispered.

He grinned and pressed a kiss to her lips.

"I am sorry Miss. And I do love you."

I love you too Danny."

He smiled because he knew.

**A/N they r happy agen. all made up. poor shauna and danny actually bt all is fine. will it stay this way tho? hmmmm who knows keep reading to find out :D x**


	37. Talking

**Rascal Flatts - One good love**

_One good love_  
_You bless all my memories_  
_You soften the fall of my tears_  
_And in my arms you're more than enough_  
_You're one good love_

_Hey you're one good love_  
_Yeah, you're one good love_

(X)

Danny whacked at the alarm ringing insistently by his bed. He snuggled closer to Melissa. She had became such a huge part of his life so quickly. He thought back to his mother. Years ago after his and Alice's wedding she spoke to him about Miss. How she was a lovely girl. She said the same about Shauna too. But he knew his mother really like Missy. Reminded her of herself at that age before she was married and a mother he thought. His eyes drifted down to the woman who still lay sleeping beside him. Curled up in a ball. Taking up more than her fair share of the bed. Not that he minded of course. Her arm was pillowed under her head, her blond hair falling over her forehead into her eyes. She looked so relaxed in sleep. Younger. She still wore that look that told you she was planning and something stupid was gonna happen. That look was always on her face. He loved her so much. He supposed he had Alice to thank for bringing them together. He never imagined he'd feel so strongly about anyone ever again. Here he was though. He'd held her close all night. Not wanting to let her go. Nothing else. He just needed her near last night. He'd been so scared to go to sleep in case he woke up and found her gone again. He moved the errant hair off her forehead. When he thought she died his chest had hurt with an crushing intensity. He was pretty sure his soul had even ached too!

She straightened up moved her head closer to him and rested it on his chest. Wrapped her arms around his waist her silk pyjama's soft against his bare chest. He wrapped his arms around her and pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head.

"Good morning." she mumbled eyes still closed.

"Good morning." he replied. "How are you?"

"Ask me in an hour." Missy took a while to wake up properly.

He laughed. "Comfortable?" he asked at her tight hug.

"Very." she told him. "Why?"

"Coz as much as I'd like to stay locked together like this we can't."

"I'm holding you hostage." she joked. "My ransom a very long hug starting now. I may resort to chains if you try to move mister!" she joked.

"Stockholm syndrome." he murmured.

She loosened her grip and pulled back. "What?" she finally opened one bleary eye.

"When you care for your kidnappers." he elaborated.

He pressed a kiss to her lips. "I more than care though. I love you."

"I know." she said on an exhale. "I love you too."

"Does it annoy you hearing it so often?" he asked.

She thought. "I dunno. I guess I still have my hang ups. I'll get over them."

"You'll hear it all the time. Coz it's true." he assured.

"I don't HAVE to hear it to know it's true." she told him.

"I know." he caressed her cheek. "I like saying it."

She half shrugged then smiled. Looked at the clock. "Can I talk to you later?"

He frowned.

"It's not too serious. Well it is but it's not."

"Now I am worried." he admitted.

"Well don't." she said simply. Climbing out of bed. Grinned down at him.

"You could reassure me you know."

She crossed her arms. "How would I do that?"

He wiggled his eyebrows.

"You are trying to corrupt me Mr Trevanion."

"Who me?" he said innocently.

She walked over to his side of the bed leaned over and kissed him deeply. He pulled her down so she tumbled onto the bed laughing. He rolled so his knees rested at either side of her hips and he was above her. Her leaned down and kissed her even deeper. She had her arms twined around his neck.

They heard a door slam then a cry over the baby monitor.

"Sorry!" Daniel shouted from the bathroom.

She loosed her arms and released him.

"Duty calls." Danny said kissed her softly on the lips a final time.

"I'll get her Danny." she said. Her rolled onto his back looked up at the ceiling. "Later." she said.

He nodded.

(X)

After both the kids voiced vehement objections they were told they had to go to school. Not happy but dressed Danny took them and arrived back home in no time. Missy was fussing over Zoey. He walked in and watched her with the child. She was in her element. Zoey's high pitched giggles making him smile. She'd make a brilliant mum. She looked up and blushed.

"Hello." she said embarrassed.

"How is she enjoying herself?" he asked.

"She's at my mercy. Hasn't mastered the art of running yet." she joked.

He laughed. "Na, she is having a great time. She's making great eye contact with you."

"I hypnotised her. Rocked her glo doll in front of her eyes. You are feeling very sleepy. Clicked my fingers and she'll do what I say. It works on kids. Small animals and men. I'm trying it on you later. Using a scalpel to hypnotise you. Daniel you are feeling sleepy. Click. Missy is your leader. Your lord and master. You are her slave your wish is her command." she nodded smiling. "Good idea huh, bet you wished you had it!"

"O yeah I sure do Miss!" he said sitting down.

She put Zoey on the floor and started chasing her crawling around. "How about we take Zoey to see daddy today huh?" she said in a singsong voice.

Zoey smiled and sat down beside her weeble village. Started playing with it. Missy got her rainmakers and put them beside her. Zoey didn't notice. Her face was intense as she concentrated on putting her weeble people down the chutes. Missy smiled.

"She's so cute when she concentrates. Double of her mother too."

Danny looked and saw Lexi's face. He'd seen his daughter wear that face countless times. He'd never noticed it before. "Yeah she does." he remarked. They watched her quietly. Missy sat on a chair.

"So Miss what did you wanna talk to me about?" the anticipation was killing him.

"Me." she said softly. "Going back to Glasgow." she added looking at him.

"Miss I thought we sorted this."

"Danny," she faltered. "Look, I dunno what you expect from me."

"That's the point Miss I don't EXPECT anything. I know what I would like. And that's for you to stay."

"That's the thing though. This was a holiday for me. I never came here with a plan to fall in love or for you to love me back. I have a week left. Where do we go from here?"

"Where do you wanna go?" he asked.

"Tell me what you want." she countered.

"Miss I can't do that. You want me to tell you to stay. So if we argue you've got an excuse to push me away. If you want to stay Miss stay. But don't expect me to tell you to stay. You have equal control in this relationship."

"But Danny I seriously don't know! I want to stay but…" she trailed off.

"But what?"

"I'm scared Danny."

"Of what me? I'd never hurt you." he said sincerely.

"No I'm scared of me!"

He looked perplexed.

"Danny I have spent my entire adult life not loving anyone properly. Holding them at arms length. And then there's you. Someone I never imagined I'd ever develop feelings for. But I did. Strong ones I couldn't ignore. I'm scared I won't be able to love you enough. That I won't be enough for you. I'm not that special Danny. Alice was special. She was just brilliant. Could attract the attention of a whole room with a single word. One day you'll wake up and I dunno….see the real me. I'm scared that I'll love you so much that I won't be able to leave you. That love will destroy me."

He would love to know why she thought she wasn't special. She wasn't just saying it either. He could tell in her eyes she truly believed it. Did she have no idea how amazing she is? "Are you saying you scared of loving me?"

"To put it simply - yes."

"Missy we know each other really well. I know all your annoying quirks too. Alice told me them all! We spent years getting to know each other didn't we?"

She nodded.

"I know everything there is to know and guess what I still love you. There's not a lot you could do that would stop me loving you."

"My sense of humour is annoying." she stated.

"Your sense of humour is brilliant." he countered. "You make me laugh. Your hilarious."

"O yeah so now I'm a clown!" she muttered. "I can't cook. I burn everything. Honestly. I cook everything to death!"

He smiled. "I'll teach you."

"Takes me forever to wake up in the morning."

"So we'll perfect a way to wake you up straight away. When we have a baby that'll happen anyway."

"B..b…baby?" she stuttered.

"After we're married." he said simply.

"Married?" she squeaked. Felt the familiar fear rise. The urge to run overwhelmed her. "I'm talking about leaving and you mention kids and marriage. You trying to make me run. Danny those 2 subjects scare the hell outta me!"

"I thought you wanted a baby." he said.

"I wasn't sure. Plus you don't have to be married to have a baby."

He looked at her in disgust.

"You weren't married to Alice when Lexi was born."

"I would have been if I'd known." he said stubbornly.

Missy shrugged. "Look this is heavy after a couple of weeks Danny." she looked uncomfortable. Unsure. Not her usual happy chirpy self.

"We've known each other years. ""Danny you were married then!" she said dryly.

"Is the idea of marrying me so horrific?" he asked insulted.

"No, the idea of marrying any one scares the life out of me. I still don't know about a baby either. It's a big responsibility Danny. I'm just so confused."

"What aren't you sure about?" he asked calmly.

"Everything. Us. Me. Leopards den. My job. My business. Everything was settled in my life. A complete jigsaw. An unexpected piece is coming in now and I have no idea what to do with it or where it goes."

"Do I fit?"

"Somewhere. You used to fit in the annoying husband of my best fried spot. When we annoy the life out of each other."

"Yeah we did." he agreed. "Was loads of fun too. We're too serious now."

"You know I look back and I realised I had feelings for you then. I didn't even know they were there. See I met you on your wedding day and only ever saw you as Alice's husband. We hit it off straight away. That should have been a big hint. I don't usually act like that with men I don't know but you just, you were so approachable."

She frowned. "Anyway I'm lost Danny. I don't know what to do. Tell me please."

"Miss I want you to stay so badly. I want to marry you eventually and if you want we can have a child too but I'm not telling you to stay!"

Missy looked at him.

"This is a test for you Miss. You gotta face your fears or they'll destroy us eventually."

She nodded. Watched Zoey on the floor. Still playing with her weeble village.

They were both silent.

"Why don't we take Zoey to see Ethan huh?" she asked.

"Yeah and we can try to convince Lex to come home. She hasn't been home in 4 days. I took her a change of clothes in but she needs a proper sleep." Danny added.

"Yeah." she agreed. They had came to an imapsse, the ball in Missy's court now.

They picked up Zoey jumped in the car and drove to the hospital.

**A/N hmmm i wonder what Missy's decision will b? stay or go **


	38. Wrong Decisons

**Blink 182 - Always**

_And I'll miss your laugh your smile_  
_I'll admit I'm wrong if you'd tell me_  
_I'm so sick of fights I hate them_  
_Lets start this again for real_

_So here I am I'm trying_  
_So here I am are you ready_

(X)

**5 Days Later**

Danny sat in Ethan's hospital room. Felt Missy distancing herself from him. Like she did when they woke up this morning. She usually wrapped herself around him tightly. Kissed him heatedly. This morning he got a half hearted hug and a peck on the cheek. The kiss on the cheek was the kicker. She showed more feeling in her kisses when Alice was alive then she did with that pitiful excuse of a kiss!

He knew she had made her decision. He also knew if he told her to stay she would and everything would all go back to normal but he couldn't. This had to be her decision. She knew his feelings on the matter. So now they sat in Ethan's room sneaking looks at each other. The majority of his bandages had been removed. His hands were badly burned but apart from that it was mainly fading scars and bruises. Missy was being quiet and thoughtful. Not her usual bubbly and flirty self. He missed her.

"So Miss what's up with all the quiet? Usually I can't get a word in edgeways." Ethan asked.

She looked up. "Huh?"

Ethan gave her a I dunno gesture.

She frowned,

"What's up Miss?"

She looked at Danny. "I was miles away Ethan." she admitted. In Glasgow to be exact.

"I knew that." Ethan said.

"You decided what your gonna do when your fully recovered?" Missy asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Well you gonna go back to your job as a therapist or maybe do something different."

"No I'm gonna go back to my job as a firefighter." he said simply. No hesitation in his tone.

Lexi's eyes darkened. "But you can't!" she was due to start work in an hour. She was sat in the room in her green uniform.

Thank you Miss. He mouthed.

"Lex it's my job honey." he soothed.

"Am I not important?" she asked. "Promise me you won't go near any burning buildings."

"Lex honey I can't do that." he told her.

"You don't care about us then!" she insisted.

"And your trying to make me feel guilty!" he decided to turn the tables. "Ok, a compromise. I'll give up being a firefighter." Lexi smiled. "If you give up being a paramedic!"

"No I won't! That's not fair!" she declared.

"It's a compromise!" he stated.

"You got badly hurt!" she hissed.

"So did you." he said calmly.

"You almost died!" she said angrily.

"So did you!" he repeated.

"This is completely different. I don't go running into burning buildings on a daily basis." she fumed.

"Neither do I Lex. But I do if I need to."

Ethan looked up and saw that Missy and Danny were gone.

"Please Ethan I can't lose you it'll destroy me!" she pleaded.

"I'm always careful Lex. You have to trust me. Trust my team to get me out of there!"

"Yeah well you wanna get rid of your second Toby. He's bastard!"

"He did the best he could Lex. It's not his fault the roof came down on me!"

"All of it is his fault. And Tapas. They set the fire Ethan. Wanted you to fail so Tapas could save the day!"

"No they wouldn't set a fire deliberately. They know with the high winds it would blow out of control quickly." he said in disbelief.

Ethan had a flash of memory. Tapas hanging around that building that came down a minute before it exploded. He looked satisfied. He was suddenly angry.

"I'm getting out of here!" he said darkly. "I'm gonna see Tapas." the bastard tried to kill him and he wasn't getting away with it!

"Ethan you can't!" Lexi repeated.

"I can and I am. This needs to be sorted!" he hissed.

He pressed a button to summon a doctor. They arrived quickly.

"I wanna discharge myself!" he said without premeable.

The doctor frowned. Mr Bell you have been seriously ill!"

"And now I'm seriously better so get me the forms. Please." he added as a afterthought.

"I must advise you to stay in!" the doctor reiterated.

"I'm going home doc. Nothing you say or do will convince me to stay. I have a few scores to settle!"

The doctor nodded stiffly. Clearly seeing he wasn't getting anywhere. Ethan swung his legs so his feet touched the floor. Stood up. He'd been wobbly the last few times he'd walked. He stood up straight and proud this time.

"He's gonna get it!" he fumed. Went to the cupboard and pulled out the clothes Lexi had brought him for when he was discharged.

"I knew I shouldn't have brought them in for you."

He took off his pyjama top.

"Who Toby?" Lexi asked.

"No Tapas. He tried to kill me! I knew something was up. He lives clear on the other side of town yet shows up for the worst fire this town has had in over 50 years?" Ethan shook his head. "He was beside that building before it exploded Lex. I bet he doused it with petrol. My team wet all the buildings so they wouldn't go up quickly it's not a full proof prevention if the fire is hot enough but it slows it down. It went up far too quickly and violently." Ethan was shaking with anger. "How could he do that to me? How could he do that to the other fighters? People he worked with before I took over. God they could have died!" he pulled on his jeans.

Lexi shook her head. "If this is true then he'd know you'd never send in someone else."

"Too right he did!" Ethan looked at Lexi.

"You know if you weren't being an idiot and leaving hospital I'd say you look handsome. I always did like you in black."

He smiled and kissed her.

The doctor returned. Sign beside the x's

Ethan signed his name.

"Don't over do it Ethan. I want you to go straight home. If you experience any dizziness. Nausea vomiting. Severe head aches. Black outs I want you back here straight away. You have a skull fracture it's very serious." the doctor then left the room.

Danny and Missy returned.

"What are you doing dressed and out of bed? Get back in there!" Missy snapped.

Ethan grinned. "O Miss not in front of Danny and Lex!" he joked.

"Ethan I'm not joking. Get your butt back in that bed before I put you in there!"

"Promises promises!"

"Right Ethan I warned you!" Took a step towards him.

He hid behind Lexi. "Protect me!" he declared laughing.

"He signed himself out Miss." Lexi said dryly.

"You did what? Are you insane?"

"No I got stuff to do after I been home to bed." he said pointedly to Lexi. "On that note can I borrow your bank card Lex?"

"Why?" she asked suspiciously.

"Just need some money to get home!"

She handed it over.

"Ok my peeps I'll see you later!"

"Ethan don't do nothing stupid. Remember skull fracture!"

He tapped his head with his fist. "Harder than granite. Don't worry!" he kissed her.

"See ya Danny. Miss."

As Ethan walked out of the hospital he released the jovialness he had forced for his family and fed the anger which was slowly growing. He wasn't going home to bed he was going to see Tapas. And not for a friendly conversation either!

Lexi looked at her father worried as they followed Ethan slowly. His stride was tight with purpose.

"I'm worried dad. Ethan thinks Tapas tried to kill him!"

"He won't do anything daft Lex." Danny said softly.

Lexi wasn't so sure!

(X)

Ethan got a taxi to the fire station. He walked in. everything looked the same but it felt different. Colder. Less friendly if that was possible. He looked and saw Cam a clipboard in hand frowning at the engines. Doing an inventory. At least they were still following his routines. Cam noticed him.

"Ethan man!" he said happily. "When did you get out of hospital. We rang yesterday and Lexi told us you'd had at least another week in there!"

"Hard as nails me." he said simply.

"You look good considering a roof fell on you less than a week ago."

Ethan shrugged. "Look Cam can you keep it quiet that I'm here? I just wanna get some paperwork sorted in the quiet you know."

Cam paled. "Tapas is in there mate."

He knew it! That's why he came straight here. God Tapas honestly thought he was gonna die!

Ethan's eyes glittered with rage. "Is he now!"

"Look Eth…" Cam started.

"Later Cam." Ethan said in a deadly tone.

Stalked over to his office. Opened the door and closed it quickly. Cam watched the door. All was quiet. There was no yelling or shouting. He released his tight pose. He was about to return to his inventory until he heard a roar of rage and then Tapas head went through the thin sheet of glass in the office window.

"Christ!" Cam yelled and ran to get the others.

**A/N me thinks ethan lost his temper. never a good thing. bt why? all will be revealed next chapter!**


	39. Idle Threats?

Ethan walked into the office. Saw Tapas sat at his desk looking superior. Smug even.

He looked up when someone walked in. "Hey you knock when you…." he saw Ethan standing there and blanched slightly. Recovered.

"Hello Ethan. How are you?"

Ethan's arms were crossed and he looked at Tapas malevolently. He was strung tight like a spring ready to burst at any provocation.

"Alive." he said coldly. "Against your best try. Your so stupid you can't even kill anyone right!" he hissed.

"What?" Tapas asked feigning ignorance.

Ethan rested his hands on the desk and leaned over. Looked Tapas dead in the eye. "I know you tried to kill me!" Ethan said angrily.

Tapas laughed. "Ethan your off your nut!" he stood up. Put a file away in the filing cabinet.

"Undoing all my changes already?" Ethan asked.

"Not all of them. I had to send the woman on leave though. They couldn't cope with what happened to you. They fell apart!"

"Like hell. They're stronger then some men I know!" he fumed. "You got rid of them coz your living in the past!" his fists clenched. "Why Tapas. If you want me come after me but you could have hurt anyone of them!" he fumed.

"I have no idea what your talking about Ethan!"

"I know you started the bush fire and the one on the building I went in."

Tapas sauntered towards him. Thoughtful. Looked him in the eye and smirked. "Prove it!"

"I will!" he warned.

"Your delusional Ethan." he said condescendingly.

"I'm fine!" he hissed.

"No, you see you really are delusional. See later maybe 30 minutes time you'll be out there telling everyone I threatened your girl and baby. But see I'd never set fire to your baby's room while she's asleep!" he told him evilly with a smirk.

Tapas knew exactly what he was doing. Smiled menacingly. If Ethan had been feeling normal he would have knew too. As it was Tapas words enraged him.

"You touch Zoey and I'll…" Ethan shook nearly losing it.

Tapas put his hands up. "I wouldn't dream of touching her." he lowered his voice menacingly. "Bet she's got loads pink teddies though. Put them on the floor around her wooden cot." he exhaled shaking his head sadly. "One little match and poof. Accident waiting to happen."

Ethan moved quickly. Grabbed Tapas head. "You'll never hurt her!" he hissed and ran his head towards the door. Tapas head plunged through the glass. It shattered the floor. Pulled Tapas head back out. Released him. Tapas straightened. Looked dazed.

"You wanna try and threaten her again?" Ethan swung and connected with his jaw. He stumbled backwards. Tapas lurched forward and swung sloppily. Ethan dodged easily.

"Your slow old man!"

Cam and 3 other firefighters ran in. Ethan turned to face them. Tapas noticed his distraction. Put his head in ahead lock. Ethan struggled. Tapas threw his head off the filing cabinet hard. 3 times before Zuri and Jamal could stop him. When Tapas released him Ethan hit the floor. Didn't move.

"Dammit Tapas what have you done?" Zuri yelled. Was kneeling beside Ethan. Checked Ethan's pulse.

"You'd better phone an ambulance Cam!" he said softly.

(X)

Lexi and bob arrived at the fire station. Cam was stood at the door. "Which one of you is hurt Cam? Did Zuri fall off some ladders again?" she asked smiling.

Cam looked grave. "Lex, it's Ethan!"

"Ethan? What's he doing here?" she asked worried. "Is he walking about? Talking?"

"He's unconscious Lex." he told her softly.

She ran into the office and saw Ethan in the recovery position. Her heart stopped for a moment.

"Ethan?" she checked his pupils. They reacted fine.

"Ethan it's Lexi can you hear me?" she said.

No reply.

"What happened?" Lexi asked.

Bob was checking his vitals while Lexi tried to rouse him.

"He just collapsed." Tapas spoke up.

Judging by the red mark on Tapas jaw and head, not to mention the broken glass outside the door Lexi found that doubtful.

"You freaking liar Tapas. You whacked his head off the filing cabinet 3 times!" Cam hissed.

Lexi's jaw dropped. "Dammit Bob he still has a skull fracture!"

"We need to get him outta here Lex!" Bob told her worried.

"How longs he been out?" she asked Cam.

"3 minutes, a little more." Cam told her. "Is he ok?"

"Bob he's unresponsive!" she panicked.

"Calm Lex. Breathe!" he told her rationally.

Ethan began to groan. Grabbed his head and frowned. "Argh!" opened his eyes.

"Lex?" he said weakly. "What are you doing here?"

"Ethan how do you feel? Dizzy? Sick? Blurred Vision?" she shot at him. Bob put his hand on her arm she quieted.

"My head hurts." he said wearily.

"I wanna get you to a hospital. For a MRI."

"No." he said grumpily. "I don't want it. I don't need it!"

"Ethan don't argue with me!" Lexi said sternly. Tried to put a neck brace on him. He batted her hand away.

"I'm refusing treatment!" he said sitting up. Caught sight of Tapas. "Get him outta here before I kill him!"

"Ethan!" Lexi declared.

"He threatened Zoey!"

Lexi's eyes darkened and she turned on Tapas. "You threatened my daughter?"

"Of course not! You said yourself he has a head injury. He's confused!"

Ethan stood up. "Not so confused when I don't recognise a threat to my child!"

Lexi stood up. Put her hand on his chest. Sat him back down. "Calm down Ethan. We'll go to hospital, have that scan yeah?" Lexi coaxed.

"He threatened to set fire to her bedroom while she was asleep Lex!" he said angrily.

"Ok Ethan." she said. Dismissing his accusation as delusion.

"I'm a firefighter Ethan I prevent fires." he said reasonably. Ethan could see in his eyes he was enjoying this. Ethan launched at him. Cam and Jamal held him back.

"LIAR! You set the fire in the township. Ask Toby!"

Lexi turned and looked at him. Toby had told her that too.

"Toby has left to go to Namibia." Zuri said.

"Coz he couldn't live with his guilt." Tapas said. Picked up a note from his desk. "I'm sorry I shouldn't have started that fire. I have to go. I'm sorry again Toby." Tapas read out. Lexi looked conflicted. Tapas looked at the fighter holding Ethan back.

"After this display I'll be in touch with the top brass at Johannesburg. I can't leave him in charge of the fighters in this manner. Violent displays are no good. I'll make sure you keep your job though Ethan you're a good firefighter a credit to my team! I have to do right them!" he said snidely.

Ethan ignored him. "Cam I want you to take over as my second. You and Jamal run this place!"

"Ethan I can't." Cam said. "I don't know how."

"C'mon Ethan!" Lexi said. Held his arm. He pulled it away.

"Just don't let him change anything Cam. I'll be back soon!"

"C'mon Ethan." Lexi repeated softly.

"Dammit Lexi I said no ok!" his temper exploded.

"Are you definitely refusing treatment Ethan?" Bob asked.

"No he isn't!" Lexi spoke up.

"Yes I am!" Ethan declared stubbornly at the same time.

"C'mon Lex. We can't force treatment on him. He's an adult."

"But Bob he has a skull fracture!" she pleaded. "He could have a possible edema!"

"He said no Lex." he looked at Ethan. "Any blurred vision, sickness, vomiting, severe headache we advise you to go straight to hospital and tell them what happened. Make sure you stay awake for at least the next 5 hours!"

Ethan nodded.

"C'mon Lex." Bob picked up their bag.

"Ethan please. Just to get checked out!" Lexi pleaded.

"I'll see you at home honey." he promised.

"Or on a stretcher when you collapse!" she yelled. Walked away.

"We should have forced him Bob!" she said walking away.

"How? Hog tie him? We're not allowed to force people to have medical attention just coz you love him Lex."

"Well we should have tied him up with our gauze!" she said seriously. Pulled a piece taut.

"Lexi, you are mad!" he chuckled.

(X)

"Ethan you should have went to hospital man!" Cam said at the sight of Ethan holding his head.

"No I don't need it!"

"If you leave now Ethan I won't press charges." Tapas said. "I understand you have had a traumatic experience. I feel for you I really do."

"Don't push me!" Ethan warned. Took a step towards him. "Your not gonna get away with threatening my daughter!"

"Ethan Zoey wasn't mentioned. You were talking about returning to work when I refused you lost your temper and grabbed me!"

The firefighters looked between them dubiously. Unsure of who to believe. Usually they'd back Ethan in a second but he was being erratic, violent and unpredictable. Not the leader they knew and respected.

"Ethan as our second I'm telling you to go home!" Cam said seriously.

"I'll be back Tapas!" he vowed.

He only agreed to go because his head hurt badly. That was the last time he lost focus around Tapas!

He walked from the office and exited the fire station quickly. Winced when the sunlight shined in his eyes. Felt a wave of dizziness overwhelm him. Should he have went to hospital? He was tired that was all. Was he told not to sleep? Bob mentioned sleeping. He was told to sleep for at least 5 years right? Or was it not to sleep for 5 hours. His head pounded with a unveiling intensity. He rang a taxi. Sleep never hurt anyone! A quick nap at home and he'd feel right as rain!

**A/N Ethan is having trouble controlling his temper. ****he lost his temper at lexi tho, not good :/ and tapas he is so gonna get whats comin to him! bt is it by ethans hand? keep reading :D x thanks to my reviewers x**


	40. Too Big to Overcome

**A/N i could decide between these 2 songs so i put both on. both songs are from danny's POV**

**Rascal Flats - My Worst Fear**

_This morning I rolled out of bed  
__Recalling all the sweet things you said  
__T__his was the day I was gonna hurt you bad  
__Called out your name, but you  
__Didn't answer back __I searched the house to find out what was wrong  
__Like a ton of bricks, it hit me you were gone_

**_Rise Against Savior._**

_That's when I said I don't hate you girl_  
_I just want to save you while there's still something left to save_  
_That's when she told me I love you boy_  
_But I'm not the answer to the questions that you still have_

(X)

Missy and Danny were out in the bush looking for an injured lion.

"Your leaving aren't you?" Danny stated.

Missy nodded. "I have stuff to sort out."

"Do you not care? About any of us?" he asked.

"Of course I do. I love all of you. But I need to do this!"

He shrugged carried on walked. Tried to bury the hurt.

"I'll miss you like crazy." she said walking beside him.

"Don't go then!"

"O so your gonna go all grumpy on me? Mister I won't tell you to stay but if you say your gonna go I'll blank you!"

"I don't want you to go!" he stressed.

"I'll be…" she had been about to say she'd be back in a day or two when he interrupted her.

"It doesn't matter Miss. Go home. Leave. It's obvious that our relationship doesn't mean all that much to you. I really thought we were going somewhere with the talking and stuff and you still insist on leaving!"

"You didn't let me finish Danny!" she fumed.

"Why? So you can say I don't wanna go or I'm sorry Danny. Well Miss I don't wanna hear it ok!"

"Fine Daniel if your sure don't wanna hear it!"

"I am!" he said stubbornly.

They continued walking in silence.

"Don't you care about me at all?" he asked softly.

God he just couldn't leave it alone! she thought. "You know I do Danny!" she said calmly.

"Then why leave?"

"I thought you didn't wanna know this!" she retorted.

"Fine!" he snapped.

"Danny honey I'm sorry."

"I just don't wanna lose you that's all Miss. This week together has been great. The more we're together the more I fall in love with you. Your important to me!"

"Understand that I need to go to Glasgow Danny. I do love you. More than I've ever loved anyone. Forever and always."

"Doesn't mean much when we're apart." he said sadly.

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder Danny."

"Or forgetful!" he told her.

"There's a saying if you love someone let them go. If they return they're yours forever. If they don't return you never had them at all." she told him.

"So you might not come back?" Danny panicked.

"I didn't say that Danny." she backtracked.

"I knew it! You wanna go? Then leave then. I don't care I'll go on like normal without you. Who needs you? Not me!"

"Believe that if you need to Danny." Missy said quietly.

"I should have known getting with you was a mistake. I thought you might actually care enough about me to try. I was wrong!"

"Your not exactly doing a lot to make me wanna stay are you Daniel. Being nasty really says love!" she retorted.

"You had no intentions of staying Miss. Admit it!"

She shrugged in defeat. Was too tired to argue with him anymore.

"Whatever you say Daniel. I'm doing all this coz I never planed to stay. I want to leave you and your kids."

"Nice of you to admit it."

She walked over and kissed his cheek. "I'm heading back to leopards den. Goodbye Danny."

"Whatever Miss." he replied nonchalantly.

(X)

Missy checked her case. All sorted. Refused to think of Danny. She could do without the hurt to be honest! She walked to the study and collected her tickets. Walked into the kitchen and grabbed a drink of water. Put her tickets on the a table. Daniel walked in. He looked at his feet. The tip of his shoe on the floor rubbing it.

"Hey Daniel."

"Your goin home then Miss?" he asked sadly.

She nodded.

"I thought you loved dad. And us."

God she had had this almost exact conversation with his father!

"I do. But there is stuff in Glasgow I need to sort out."

Daniel nodded.

"Your good." he frowned trying to explain himself fully. "Not as a mum coz I have a mum. Just coz she isn't here doesn't mean she isn't my mum. But you help me, and Amie. She needs a girl around."

"Amie'll be fine. She has Lexi."

"Do you have to go Miss?"

"I won't be away forever and ever."

He shrugged. "You won't be here when I need you. Your easier to talk to then dad. Dad's good. But he's dad you know?"

"Tell you what here's my phone number and email. You need me, any time day or night just get in touch ok?"

He held the paper in his hands. "Ok. Bye Miss."

She hugged him tightly. "Bye Daniel. Don't let your dad buy you any seriously dodgy clothes. Death by bad fashion huh?" she grinned at him.

Daniel laughed a little. "I'll try."

"Don't forget call me ok!" Missy reminded.

He nodded.

She walked from the house. Saw Amie on the veranda.

"I don't want you to go." Amie had tears in her eyes.

"Awww Ames. I told you I was only here for 3 weeks baby." she wrapped her arms around her.

"Mum told me in a dream you were gonna take are of all of us. She said you'd be my new mum so I wouldn't miss her so much!"

That definitely sounded like Alice 'Go on mate out me on the spot.' she thought.

'Try an wiggle outta this one!' She heard Alice reply in her head. Smiled at the laughter in her friends voice.

She had no idea what to say she yearned to tell the child she had a return ticket for a couple of days time but that was being cancelled due to her idiot, infuriating mule headed father!

"Ames your my friend right?"

Amie nodded.

"Sometimes friends don't live close but it doesn't mean they aren't friends. I'll visit again soon."

"But I want you to live with us. Like mum and dad did."

"Baby your mum and dad were married."

"You marry him." Lexi declared.

Missy felt acid pool in her stomach. "It isn't that easy petal."

Amie frowned. "You love each other yeah? Marry each other." she said simply.

"Your too little to understand sweetie."

She frowned. "Do you not love daddy and us anymore?"

"I love you kids always. And your dad too." she added. "But see I have family and friends and my job in Glasgow."

Amie nodded.

"Hey I'll miss you short stuff!" Missy told her.

Amie smiled.

"No more tears huh?"

Amie nodded.

"I'll phone you every night so you can tell me if anything is bothering you."

"OK. Bye Miss."

Amie hugged her tightly.

"I'll miss you Missy."

"Me too Ames." she wasn't lying either. This little girl along with her brother were so important to her. Along with Lexi, Ethan and Zoey. She couldn't love them more if they were her own kids.

Missy walked into the house. Straight to her room. Saying goodbye to the kids had been hard. She remembered she left her flight tickets in the kitchen. She walked from her room and saw Danny looking at the kitchen table. He looked at her.

"A return ticket Miss? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I tried. You didn't wanna hear it. I didn't get the chance. Doesn't matter anyway I'm cancelling it! I'm outta here Daniel and I dunno when I'll be back. If ever. Just like you wanted. See I figured you out. You say I push you away but you do exactly the same. Your so scared of losing someone else you love that you do the same. You didn't tell me to stay coz you don't wanna control me you gave me the choice coz deep down you knew what I'd chose and that's safer for you isn't it?"

Danny stood frowning at her assessment of him. "Your right." he said softly.

Missy was taken aback. Shocked by his admission.

"You don't know what it'll do to me to lose you Miss. Stay Miss. I love you."

"I love you Danny. We're too alike for us to ever work properly. I'm sorry but we can't be together."

He nodded. Understanding. "We make a pair huh?"

"Yeah. I'm sorry we couldn't make us work." She told him. Meaning every word.

"Me too."

She picked dup her flight tickets. Went to walk away.

"NO!" He said. "I'm doing it again. Letting you walk away. We CAN make us work. If we try. We're both scared of what might happen that we're forgetting how happy we make each other. We can't worry about what the other thinks or will do. Don't cancel that ticket. Come back. What we have is too important to throw away. You're the person I need. The person I love." he'd walked towards her and held her hands in his.

"I'm going home Danny." she kissed him once. Tenderly. "Goodbye honey." she whispered against his lips.

"I tried Miss." he said as she walked away.

She looked back. "I know Danny. I love you for it."

She collected her case and walked out of his life.

He exhaled a large breath. He tried his best. That's all he could do.

**A/N ok so i didn't kill missy off, she's just gone back to glasgow coz she's messed up. poor danny, he can pick em :/ miss is an idiot!**


	41. Bad Night Gets Worse!

Lexi walked into the house. Zoey was in her pram. All was quiet. Her dad had collected Zoey from day care hence the pram. Zoey disliked it as she wasn't in it often. She usually fought like tooth and nail when Lexi tried to put her in there. Her daddy's stubbornness coming through. His temper too. The house was quiet and she opened a letter she had saw on her dad's table addressed to her. It was a letter from Missy saying she was heading back to Glasgow and would call her later. That she was sorry and she loved them but she had stuff she had to work out on her own and couldn't do it there.

"oh Miss no! don't run away. Dad loves you, you idiot!" she muttered. Put the letter back in the envelope.

"You know Zo?" Lexi asked lifting her from her pram. "Auntie Missy is silly!"

"Siee." Zoey parroted.

Lexi smiled. "Yeah baby."

She flicked the switch on the landing as it was dark.

"Ethan?"

All was silent.

"Ethan?" she asked sharper.

"Ean." Zoey said.

Oops. He wouldn't be amused if his daughter called him that. "No daddy baby."

She walked into their bedroom he lay still on his back. Lexi's heart stopped for a second as she watched for movement in his chest. She placed Zoey in the travel cot they set up if she had a unsettled night and then went and knelt beside Ethan checking him over.

She shook him. "Ethan. Ethan!" she said loudly.

He mumbled something incoherent. Gibberish. She put her hand on his head. He felt hot. Clammy. Fever maybe?

She shook him. "Ethan it's Lexi if you can open your eyes for me honey."

He was either deeply asleep or…. She thought when he didn't move.

"dada." Zoey sang as she played with a rattle. "Da da." she repeated.

Ethan's head moved. "Don't worry Lex I got her. You stay in bed." he mumbled. His eyes opened. He looked at Lexi. His eyes heavy lidded with sleep. He frowned.

"Why you kneeling over me Lex? You weren't planning on smothering me in my sleep were you?" he smiled a sleepy sexy grin at her. She smiled back automatically. Her heart swelled with love and relief that he wasn't ill. Just deeply asleep.

"How's your head Ethan?" she ran her hand down it softly.

He wobbled it. "Still attached." he grinned rubbed his face tiredly.

"I'm being serious Ethan!"

"So am I! it's still hanging on in there!"

"Ha ha!" she said. No trace of humour in her tone.

"Ok, it's a bit sore but no I'm not dizzy or nauseous or blurred vision and I shouldn't still be tired but I am." he shrugged.

"How long you been a sleep?"

"I came straight home after you left me at the fire station like a good little Ethan and I went to bed to get at least 5 hours sleep like Bob told me."

"Ethan you idiot! He said no sleep for 5 hours."

"O, my bad." he said with a wry smile.

"You cold have slipped into a coma!"

"Sorry honey my head was all over."

"I'm not surprised. Tapas bashed your head off the filing cabinet. I swear if he goes near you again I won't be held accountable for my actions. You know he wanted to leave you under the rubble til later?"

"Aww my protective Lexi."

"You shouldn't have went to see him Eth."

"Her tried to kill me then threatened Zoey. He isn't getting away with that by the way!" he vowed.

"Ethan you did hit your head honey."

"Don't tell me I didn't hear what I heard. He did threaten her Lex!"

"Are you sure. The way he tells it you were violent erratic. Not you. No one blames you."

"Not you too Lex! Do you really think I'd mistake something like that?"

"Angry, erratic Ethan." he repeated.

"You do!" he said in disbelief. "You think I'm a nutter?"

"No I think you've had a tough time. And your confused!"

"How diplomatic of you Lexi. Confused. Just tell it like it is. You think I've lost my mind don't you!"

He sat up quickly and felt a piercing pain at the top of his head. White spots danced in front of his eyes. He grabbed his head and groaned.

"Ethan?" she asked worried.

When her reply was him clutching his head she declared. "Right your going to hospital for a MRI."

"I'm fine Lex." he said shakily. "I just moved too fast. I wanna see my daughter."

"What you think I'm gonna let you pick her up in this state?"

He released his head and looked at her. Eyes narrowed. "Your not gonna LET me pick my own child up?" he asked in disbelief. His head moved closer to hers. "Since when have I needed permission?" he asked angrily.

"Since you started acting like an idiot. You had a serious skull fracture signed yourself out of hospital against doctors orders. Then you have bashed in numerous times. Refuse treatment against paramedics advice. If you have anything wrong with your brain it could drop you in a second and I refuse to take that chance with her!" she fumed.

He pushed himself to standing. Wobbled slightly. He looked at the cot. Zoey smiled when she saw him and raised her arms "da da!"

"Hello Zo Zo baby." he walked over. Lexi stood in front of him and blocked his path.

"Dada?" Zoey asked when she couldn't see Ethan anymore

"Move Lexi!" he said. Anger rising.

"No Ethan you can't hold her yet. Tomorrow." she said reasonably.

He heard Zoey crying Dada.

"Move Lexi your upsetting her!" he hissed.

"I'm not you are."

"Dammit Lex move. You annoying me. I'm warning you!"

Lexi's green eyes flashed fire. "O your warning me. Should I just step aside. What you gonna do if I don't big man!" raised herself up to her full 6 feet 5 inches. Looked him dead in the eyes. "C'mon then Ethan do it!"

He was breathing heavily. Anger coursing through him. Then he scared himself. Considered pushing her out of the way. In front of his child. No! he couldn't hurt her. And Zoey. What if he scared her? His head was pounding and Lexi was staring him down and Zoey was crying and his brain just felt like it was overloading!

Lexi saw Ethan's face change. His skin was all red and flushed. She thought it was from anger. Was she wrong? He was coated in sweat.

"Ethan you ok?" she asked. Put her hand on his head.

He backed away. "I'm sorry Lexi. I shouldn't have said that to you!" he said horrified. "I would do it I swear!" he babbled. Started clutching his head bent double.

"God Ethan!" Lexi said.

"Leave me alone. Take Zoey and go!" he asked.

"No I wanna help you!"

"Please Lex I'm struggling with my temper. I can't lose my temper with you. She can't see me lose it. Please take her Lex."

"No Ethan!"

He stood up sharply. "Dammit Lexi!" he yelled.

Startled Zoey. Her lower lip trembled. "Oh no!" he whispered. He had scared his baby. He had to get away. He had… he practically ran from the room to get away. This was going too far. He heard Lex shouting for him. He ignored her. Left the house. Not before he grabbed a set of keys off the rack. Was soon behind the house. Pulled Lexi's mo-ped from under the tarpaulin. It roared to life. He sped off in a cloud of dust. Passed Lexi holding Zoey.

Ethan rode about for an hour. Ignored the pounding in his skull. It beat the same tempo as his heart. While riding he had came to a decision. He was gonna take Tapas out once and for all. He wouldn't be struggling to control himself if he wasn't messing with his head. And if he hadn't hurt him in the first place! He rode to the fire station. Parked the mo-ped round the back. Pocketed the keys. He frowned when the place was empty and one of the engines was gone. The place seemed weird quiet. His footsteps echoed down the corridor to his office. No matter he'd wait. He was a patient man. No one threatened Zoey and got away with it!

(X)

The fire engine returned soon enough. Ethan was sat in his office with his feet on the desk. Leaning back in his chair. Grinning cockily. Waiting. Adrenaline flooded through him. He was listening. Could hear Cam and Jamal and their usual banter. Ata mumbling about something. And Toby…Toby? He had left hadn't he? Well it just meant he'd be able to get his revenge on him too. Tapas was first in line. For Zoey!

No one was coming to the office and that was annoying him. Felt anger and frustration meld together inside him building. God what was with all this uncontrollable rage? He breathed trying to calm himself. Heard footsteps approaching. Smiled widely. The door opened and Toby walked in. turned the light on. The room was no longer pitch black.

Toby looked momentarily startled when he caught sight of Ethan. "Ethan? Why are you sitting in the dark?"

"I think the more appropriate question is why did you help Tapas try to kill me? I can't understand that Toby. Fair enough we weren't best friends but what did I ever do to you?"

Toby paled. "Look Ethan I never…"

"You never what?" he spat. "Set a fire which destroyed the township? That building I went in Toby. He set fire to that too. Deliberately!"

"No it wasn't me. It was Tapas. He rang me as soon as it was out of control."

"I went in a burning building Toby. It almost killed me!" he hissed.

"Ethan I tried to stop you. You know I did!"

"You expect me to let you go in if I wouldn't? I wouldn't expect you to risk your life if I didn't expect the same of myself."

"Look Ethan I'm sorry right but I didn't cause this!"

"Your of little consequence. Stay the hell away from me and we'll be fine. But I'm not gonna let Tapas drop. No way!"

"Look Ethan he isn't worth it, you'd be throwing all this away."

"I don't care Toby. He has this coming!"

"Look I was just about to leave for Namibia when he rang me. Asked me to come back as his second. It would be the same as before. He told me you were as good as gone. I came back coz I was worried that he had finished you off or planned to! Heard him arguing on the phone in here. He was angry. Irate. Livid. See the top brass were refusing to get rid of you. They were impressed with all the changes you had implemented. Out spot checks have been a million times better since you took over. They were considering shutting us down when you came. Anyway he slammed the phone down and strode out of here saying he was going home to bed. His head hurt after what you done."

"I'm not surprised they were gonna shut this place down." Ethan muttered.

"Your still the leader here. He's still out. Whatever suspicions you have go to the police. I'll back you up. Ethan the men and woman need you. We're far from perfect but we're better than we were. You were right this place was a shambles but nobody wanted to rock the boat. It was only a matter of time before someone died."

Ethan's face turned contemplative.

"If you go after him you lose everything. Your job. The respect the fighters have for you. You lose Lexi and Zoey and your freedom coz you'll go down. He's planned for it. He's a meticulous planner."

Ethan looked at the picture he had found in the bin by his desk. A newborn Zoey and a shattered Lexi. Lexi grinning a wide from ear to ear. He had blue tacked a piece of paper to the bottom. 'Stay strong'. He did that way back at the beginning. When he was ready to give up. The fighters were being funny with him. He missed his daughter and Lexi and was ready to say to hell with it. She encouraged him. Told him to stay strong and he'd get through. It'd get better.

'thanks honey.' he told the picture mentally. He looked at Toby.

"Since you had no hand in the fire you won't have charges filed but I want you to stay as my second." Ethan told him. "Yeah really." he added at Toby's shock face. "We'll get Tapas. Legally."

Ethan stood up. Extended his hand. They shook.

"I want you to be in charge while I'm gone, I'm still 100 percent but I'm getting there. I'll speak to a doctor then give you a time fr…"

He gasped and grabbed his head as a blinding hot pain engulfed him. He felt the blood rushing through his head. Heard it rushing passed his ears. It passed after a minute. He looked at Toby phone in hand.

"No it's ok. They only last a few minutes then I'm fine."

Toby put the phone down.

"I'm gonna get hone now. Ring me on my mobile if you need anything ok. Anything. Even if it sounds stupid or tiny. Don't guess. Guessing gets people killed."

Toby nodded. The fire bell rang as he and Toby walked from the office.

"I'll grab the paper you go to your engine." Toby nodded

Ethan went to the printer. His eyes widened. Ran to the engine. Climbed inside.

"Get going there a fire at Mini Leopards Den!" Ethans and Lexi's house!

**A/N Ethan struggling to control his temper here. What will he find when he gets home?**


	42. Hell On Earth

**Disciple - No End At All**

_There's no where your not  
__Walked with me, carried me on  
__There's nowhere i can't go  
__Even to the depths of the sea  
__Your not too far away when i wake when i sleep  
__You are capturing me with a love that knows no end at all_

(X)

I t was dark. Tapas crept around the house quietly. Breathing shallowly. All was silent, both Zoey and Lexi will be all tucked up in bed. Bless them. Actually damn them both to hell. The kid for being his offspring and Lexi for giving it life! He looked in the windows as he passed. Found the baby's room. Saw a mound in the middle of her cot. He honestly hadn't been serious when he threatened Lexi and Zoey. But those bastards refused to sack him and he needed his job back so badly. This is necessary. He splashed petrol up the walls beside her room. Then all over the veranda. Coated every possible escape route. Windows and doors. It would go up fast. Spread quickly. Burn rapidly. The smoke would overpower them so they wouldn't suffer. He had already covered the smoke alarms in the house. Trying desperately to be quiet. Ethan couldn't have got battery powered smoke alarms. Not they had to be powered into the mains. He would have turned the electric off but that would have used time he didn't have and Ethan could get back any minute now. Tapas had went to the fire station and saw Ethan walk in. That was when his plan had presented itself to him.

Ethan's girl and kid might not suffer but he knew Ethan would! Ethan took his job. So Tapas was gonna take everything that mattered to Ethan. See he had no wife. No children. He had devoted his entire life to that job and some cocky hot shot had the gall to come in and take all that away from him. Like hell! Tapas refused! Ethan was gonna know pain. Know how it felt to have your entire life taken away. He splashed more fuel angrily. He had briefly considered doing it while Ethan was in the house with them but where was the fun in that? Super Ethan would probably get them out. Why couldn't he have just died when that building came down on top of him? See it was his fault his kid had to die, if he had died his kid could have lived!

He crept into the house after picking the lock poured petrol down the hallway leaving a puddle up to the kids door and floor. He considered popping his head in the room. His curiosity got the better of him and he opened the door quietly. The red light was on the baby monitor so he stayed quiet. He couldn't see her face in the darkness but he knew by the pictures dotted around the office she looked exactly like him. Can't get rid of daddy get rid of his clone!

"Bye Bye Zoey Bell." he breathed barely audible.

He best not go into Lexi's room. She might wake up. He walked into the living room and retrieved a picture. Shoved it in his pocket. For no. crept from the house again took his gloves off and stood at the bottom of the stairs. Flicked his metal lighter turned it off and on a few times. Looked into the depths of the orange flame. Smiled. At one time fire had been his foe. His enemy to be defeated at all costs. Not know though. Fire was his friend. They were united against a common enemy - Ethan. Once Ethan was destroyed they'd again go their separate ways. A temporary truce was all they had.

Tapas knew that he was unbalanced now. But he'd get better as soon as he had his job back. Decision made he set fire to a rag then threw it on the petrol trail with a whoosh it snaked around the house and up the walls. Burning bright orange. That was the heat he knew. It crackled happily. It sounded like laughter. An alarm went off insistently. He ignored it and watched his handiwork. Satisfied that Lexi and the baby were unconscious and that he had did a good job he went to walk away. The whole house would be gone in no time. The picture! Damn he'd nearly forgot that. A message for Ethan. He wrote a few words as he walked to his car and dropped it to the ground. Decided to phone the fire brigade. After all he is a conscientious citizen. He smiled at his dark humour. He climbed into his car and navigated his way out of Leopards Den. Feeling good. Revenge was sweet.

(X)

The fire engine arrived at Leopards Den. The hose was almost gone. It was black. Ominous black smoke cloud rose steadily. Orange flames licked at the little fuel there was left. Ethan had his firemen gear on. Toby had tired to stop him. Ethan had halted him with a look.

"Lexi!" he yelled. Climbed from the truck. "Zoey!" he yelled again.

They had to have got out. They had to! The house had obviously burned quickly. He scanned the area. He couldn't see them anywhere. Looked at the house. Felt his heart stop.

"NO!" he roared. Went to run inside. Toby held him back.

"Ethan look at it, there's nothing left!" Toby stressed.

"They're in there. They might be alive. Let me go Toby!"

"Ethan you and I both know that if they ARE in there…." Toby looked at the now calming fire. The engineers dousing it. "I don't have to tell you mate!"

"My daughter is in there Toby. She'll be scared. She needs her daddy. Let me go!"

Ethan yanked himself free. Ran towards the house. Reached the stairs when the walls on the left side of his house fell down with an almighty crash. Leaving only half of his house standing.

"No. No No." he whispered. Bouncing on his feet looking around. The back! He sprinted to the back looking for a way in. He had to find a way in. He had to get them out of there. He ran 2 circles around his house before he realised there was no way he was getting in there. He came to a stop at the foot of his veranda. What was left of it anyway. He stared. Shoulders slumped. Eyes glistening. Cam and Jamal dousing the blackened gutted shell. Saw the outline of his fridge and cooker. Swallowed thickly as he saw Zoey's high chair melted and black stood sadly. The fire was out. He stared at what used to be his house. His entire life lay in those ruins. This was a bad dream right? He waited for himself to wake up. It never came. The smell of smoke filled his nostrils. The heat from the embers felt warm against his skin. The pain he felt was too sharp and far too real. Tears streamed from his eyes. He couldn't say how long he just stood staring. Blankly. People bustling around him. He didn't see or hear them.

Toby came up behind him. "Ethan."

Ethan stared at the house.

"Ethan." he repeated softly.

Ethan looked at Toby. Toby had never seen an expression as tortured as the one that was on Ethan's face. His eyes flat and lifeless he didn't say a word just looked at Toby. Like he was in shock.

"We'll sort this here. You go to Leopards Den. Your in no condition to be here mate." he led Ethan to the engine. Ethan followed mechanically. Unaware of what he was doing. He took off his helmet, jacket and trousers robotically. His other clothes underneath.

"You need a lift?"

Ethan shook his head. His fellow colleagues and friends laid their hands on his shoulder in sympathy as they passed. Murmured soft words and platitudes. He felt and heard nothing. He was broken. Everything he lived for was gone just like that. An instant. He wondered if this was what insanity felt like. He didn't feel sane at the moment. He was too calm for this to be normal behaviour.

This was Tapas handiwork. His shocked and muddled brain registered that one thought. If he had just gave up his job like Tapas told him and he'd have never made good on his threat to hurt his family. Ethan the fool that he was hadn't taken him seriously. Too preoccupied with getting revenge for threats made that it never occurred to him that he might actually do it! Tapas wasn't a bad man. Or wasn't until Ethan took everything from him!

He walked through the bush. Rain droplets fell on his face. But nowhere else. No not rain droplets. Tears. He hadn't even known he was crying. His brain whirled. Why hadn't the smoke alarms alerted her? They should have warned her to get out of there. Unless he disabled them somehow. He wiped his face with his hand, noticed a picture on the floor. He picked it up. Lexi and Zoey. The one on the wall in the sitting room. Ethan like this one coz Zoey looked like a brown eyes Lexi on here he ran his fingers down his daughters smiling face. Her bottom teeth showing so cute in her grin. Closed his eyes as pain engulfed him. He turned the picture over. There was writing.

'Now we're even. Your welcome!' beside it lay a drivers license. He knew it! TAPAS!

As soon as he'd been to se Danny he was gonna find him and kill him with his bare hands. He had no reason to hold back now!

"I swear to both of you right now he will not get away with what he done to you! He will suffer!" He vowed.

He walked and stared at the picture. His poor baby girl. Her warm brown eyes and sweet baby grin. His chest ached so much it felt like it was filled with lead and it was straining to get out.

In his mind he knew that Lexi and Zoey wouldn't have suffered. The smoke would have overcame them before they felt anything one small mercy he supposed. The only two people he needed in the world. The only two people he had gave his heart to. Pledged his life to protect. Cruelly ripped from him. He'd always swore that he would never hurt them. He hadn't been able to protect them from the threat that his mere prescence had posed. God what was the point of him being here without them? He didn't wanna exist without them. He saw the roof of Leopards Den in the distance. He was gonna have to tell Danny that his daughter and granddaughter had been taken from them, coz of Ethan. Coz of his stupid pride and arrogance. Coz he wouldn't back down. God he hated himself. Despised himself. There wasn't a word strong enough for the revulsion that coursed through him. All because he was an idiot his babies life had been taken away. Before it had even begun. His darling daughter. The ONLY person he loved in this world beyond everything else. Even her mother. He looked at her and knew there were no bounds to the lengths he would go to protect her. Now that was gone. He hadn't done what he promised He'd let her down!

"Daddy is so sorry baby. I know it doesn't mean much. Your gone now but know I'm sorry. Daddy loves you for all of forever and beyond. Unconditionally."

Tears streamed form his eyes.

"You be good for mum up there and I'll be seeing you soon."

He emerged from the trees saw lights burning at Leopards Den. He trudged towards the house.

**A/N nothing will stop ethan now. i pity tapas when ethan gets his hands on him. i truly do even tho he deserves it after what he done to lex and Zo! keep readin to find out how ethan gets his revenge and that final sentance too. what is he planning?**


	43. Lost and Broken

**Disciple - My Hell**

_This is my hell living without you_  
_Even heaven is hell if somehow you were not there  
__I need to  
__Breathe you  
__Drink you  
Love you_

(X)

As Ethan approached the house he tried to plan what he was going to say to Danny. How do you say something like this? How much loss could one family endure before they fractured and broke completely and irreparably. He tried to force his feet to walk up the steps but they refused. Like they were glued to the spot. He sat down on the steps. In the dark. Listened to sounds of the night along with an incessant ringing in his ears which grew louder and shriller as the seconds ticked by. He rested his arms on his legs and laid his head on it. Was reminded of a conversation he and Danny had many years ago on this exact spot. How no father should ever even think his kids are dead. He's never fully understood what Danny meant. He thought he had but he hadn't. The pain he was experiencing was way out of the realm of imagination. He understood now though. He was living it now! He breathed slow and deep. Footsteps approached. He longed to ignore them. He didn't wanna do this to Danny. He didn't wanna know it himself.

"Ethan?" Danny asked. "Why are you sat out here in the dark son. Come inside."

Ethan didn't move. Didn't speak. Didn't raise his lowered head.

"Ethan son are you ok? Do you need a doctor? Are you ill?" Danny asked concerned.

"I left our house Danny. We argued." he breathed heartbroken. "I lost my temper. Why did I lose my temper?"

"Ethan?" Danny asked confused.

Ethan stood up with his back to Danny. Turned. Danny saw his face covered in black soot. Tear tracks down his dirty cheeks. He swallowed thickly.

"Tapas came. He…." Took a deep breath then said quickly. "He burned out house down." he took another couple of deep breathes. "They were inside the house. Alone. I should have been there to get them out but I wasn't. Now they're both…" Ethan couldn't finish. Emotion overcome him. He broke down.

Danny walked towards him. "Ethan your wrong! Calm down! They're inside the house."

Ethan froze. Felt shock overcame him for the second time tonight. Hope bloomed in his chest.

"You mean their both." he pointed to the house.

Danny nodded seriously. Ethan didn't wait a second. He ran inside the house. Was straight into Zoey's room. Saw her asleep in her cot. Lips puckered.

"Oh God!" he breathed. Was almost bent double over her cot staring at her. His hand shook as it raised to his forehead. He couldn't think. The only thing that registered is that she was here. Alive breathing. She was fine. Safe! He wasn't the cause… he covered his eyes and was soon weeping hot silent tears over her cot. His body shook with the force of his tears. He dragged big gulping breathes into his lungs.

"Ethan." a voice asked behind him. He spun. Lexi stood there. In shorts and a t-shirt. Like a ray of sunshine on a bleak dark day. He walked to her and pulled her in his arms for a big engulfing hug. Proving to himself she was real and he wasn't cracking up. He squeezed her tightly to him.

"I'm never letting you go again. I'm so sorry Lexi. I love you so much!" he was crying again.

"C'mon." she led him out of their daughters room but he wouldn't stop hugging her so she back walked through the hall. Looked at her dad and shook her head imperceptibly. Ethan wasn't ready. She closed the door behind them. His face was buried in her neck. It was soaked. He was sobbing his heart out. Truly crying. She had never heard him cry in this before. Sure he had cried when her mum died but It had nothing on the shudders that were wracking his body right now. He was muttering too. About losing her. She rubbed her back and talked to him. Soothed and calmed him. When he quieted she handed him some baby wipes to clean up his face. Then she took off his shirt and trousers. And gave him some clean stuff.

He sat on the bed. He looked tired. He hadn't spoke a word.

"You get dressed and I'll get you tablets and water ok?"

She ran her hand down his cheek.

He nodded and began pulling on the clothes.

She left the room and saw her dad in the kitchen.

"Is he ok Lex?" he asked.

"I have no idea. I can't get anything coherent out of him. He keeps muttering about Tapas and me and Zoey."

"Your house has been burned down Lexi. He thought you were inside."

She covered her mouth with her hand and stifled a gasp.

"I've never seen him in that state before. His face. I'd say it was blank but it wasn't. It was completely devoid of life. He was heartbroken. Apart from that he looked dead for want of a better term. Like his life was over and he had no reason to be here anymore! He scared me actually."

Lexi nodded. "I'll sort him dad. He'll be ok. Don't worry."

"I'm so relieved that you chose to come over here tonight." he told her and patted her hand.

"It was Ethan. Inadvertently he save us. See he warned me to get away. He was having real problems controlling his temper. He did lose it slightly before he left he scared me a little so I thought it'd be best if I stayed here tonight. You know so he had time to cool off."

Danny nodded and hugged her. "The only time he'll ever be relieved that he lost his temper huh?"

Lexi nodded. "I'd better see to Ethan."

She walked back to their room and saw Ethan stretched out on the bed. On his stomach bare to the waist. His hand rested over a photo. She pulled it and looked at it. One of his favourites. Her and Zoey. She turned it over.

'Now we're even. Your welcome.'

"Oh Tapas you bastard. I'll kill you for this!"

She looked at Ethan. His eyes closed. Breathing slow and deep. She went into Zoey's room and lifted her from her cot. She wanted her close in case Tapas found out and tried something else! She carried her into her and Ethan's room. Placed her in the spare…well only travel cot they had now. They used to have 2 sets of everything for her. Now everything they had was destroyed. She didn't wanna think about that. Zoey gristled until she settled. She was like Ethan. A light sleeper until she was shattered. She hadn't had a long nap at nursery. Only 10 minutes and she was very crabby before she went to sleep. How close had she came to staying at home because of Zoey being unsettled? She couldn't think of that right now. She turned off the lamp and turned on the night light. Ensured the bedroom window was locked. Climbed into bed beside Ethan and hugged him tight. His skin cool against hers. She rested her arm across his back. He didn't utter a word just slept on. She lay awake for a long time. Her heart breaking for what he must of went through. Thinking he had lost them both in such a violent and horrific manner. Eventually her eyes closed and she slept.

(X)

Lexi awoke. She was hot. Too hot. Her clothes clung to her body. Heat emanated form the body beside her. She came awake quickly. Ethan was frowning.

"No." he muttered weakly. Covered his eyes with his arm. "Lex. Zoey." he whispered.

She put her hand on his arm to wake him. It was hot. "God!" she whispered, tested his head with the back of her hand.

"Christ Eth your burning up!" she whispered.

She rolled from the bed and was quickly in the bathroom. Grabbed the thermometer, a bowl of cold water and a flannel. Was back inside the room in no time. Popped her head to check on Zoey in her cot at the bottom of their bed. Fine. Sound asleep. She laid the thermometer on Ethan's head. Ran to the kitchen got ice with more water and a medical syringe they used for Zoey.

She checked the thermometer when she was back in the room. She knew it. He had a fever. She cooled him with the cool water and flannel then placed it on his head. He shivered but stopped twitching. She filled the syringe with water.

"Ethan honey open your mouth for me."

He lay still. She moved his head and pressed down on his chin softly but firmly too. She pressed the syringe and the water went into his mouth. He swallowed. She repeated it a few times till it trickled over the side of his mouth down his chin.

She caressed the side of his face. "I'm taking care of you honey. Don't worry. You'll be better soon I promise."

He lay still and quiet. She smoothed the damp hair from his forehead. His breathing slow and deep.

**A/N ok lexi and zoey completly fine bt ethan isn't, will he b ok? x**


	44. Better

**Chamillionaire - Warn You. (Ethan POV to Tapas)**

_Before you die your life  
Will flash before your eyes wow  
Well if that's true your life  
Will flash before your eyes now  
Everyone is quite foul  
I get revenge you like how  
Eye for an eye  
A bullet between your eye brows  
_

(X)

Ethan was floating. He felt something soft against his head. As well as something cold. "Urg!" he groaned.

Something wet trickled into his mouth and he swallowed eagerly involuntarily.

"Ethan?" an angel asked, in a musical tenor. "Are you ok?"

He was reluctant to open his eyes. Not that he could. They felt heavy.

"Ethan there's some one here who wants to see you." the angel said.

He wanted to sleep. Felt it beginning to overtake him.

"Dada!" a voice said

His daughter! He tried to force his eyes open. They still felt heavy.

"No dad." the angel said. The fever has broke but he's still asleep. Bring her in later yeah."

"Ok Lex. Don't worry he will get better!"

"The doctor should have admitted him to hospital!" she fumed. "He's been out for nearly 2 days!"

He heard a click as the door closed. A soft hand on his cheek.

"Ethan honey I'm so worried. Wake up soon." he felt a hand in his. Sleep finally retook him.

(X)

The room was quiet. A lamp burned in the corner. It was dark outside. Ethan opened one eyes slowly. Then the other. Looked around. Swallowed. His mouth was a dry as sticks. He looked at the clock 22:37. It took a while to process that it was 10:30 at night. His brain was being slow. He looked beside his bed. Lexi curled up on a chair. Her head rested on it's back. She looked worried even in sleep. He tried his voice.

"Lexi." it came out scratchy.

Her eyes flew open and she was sat beside him in a second. Before she was even awake fully.

"Ethan are you ok?"

He swallowed nosily. She got the cup of water sat him up. "Sip it." she murmured.

He did.

"Better?" he asked.

He nodded,. "A little." he smiled.

"You ok honey?" she whispered.

"Yeah. How long have I been out?"

"3 days. I've had numerous doctors in here. They wouldn't admit you to hospital."

"Go to bed Lexi." he urged.

"No I'm taking care of you. You need me!"

"I'll be fine I promise. I'm awake. Sleep before YOU become ill. Please I'll yell if I need you. Please!"

It was the second please that made her relent. "How about I sleep on here?" she suggested.

"No deal honey. Granite is probably more comfortable than that chair! Go sleep in a bed. What a novel idea! I'm better now. Go on!"

"I don't wanna leave you Eth!"

"Sleep!" he insisted.

She hugged him tightly. "I'll see you in the morning Lex. I love you."

"I love you too Ethan." she replied softly. Sincerity evident in her tone.

"And no sneaking in when I'm asleep coz I'll know!" he joked.

"Good night honey." she said wearily.

"Yeah." he blew her a kiss.

When she left his room he yawned and stretched his muscles. They protested having been lain in the same spot for 3 days. What had happened to him? He remembered the fire at his house. And making his way over here thinking his family had been… it was blurry after that. Until he laid eyes on his daughter. That image burned brightly on his brain. There was no feeling like it. He felt more than mere relief at the sight of her. He felt like he had been reborn in a way. Coz a part of him had died when he thought of his family gone. He climbed from his bed. Eager to see her again. He'd only seen her a second. He stood up slowly. His legs felt weak. Like jelly. He took slow steps. Walked into his daughters room. Stood above her cot. Ran a finger down her cheek. Feather light so not to wake her. Smiled at her.

"Daddy underestimated him but never again. He'll never get the chance of hurting you Zoey. No one will ever hurt you!" he vowed. "Not while I'm here!"

He stood for what felt like an age. Just staring at her face, the image of his own. He'd say an angel but she was far better than an angel. he stood and thanked God and the angels and everyone else who had protected his daughter.

(X)

Eventually Ethan returned to bed. Woke at 6 the following morning. He'd say full of energy but he wasn't quite that good yet. But he was feeling energetic. He climbed from his bed. Stretched and smiled as the warm suns rays peeked through his curtains. He felt better. Last night he had felt like night of the living dead. Now he felt less zombie like. He showered quickly. Walked back into his room. Pulled on a armless blue t-shirt and a pair of blue three quarter shorts. Ran his hand through his hair and grimaced when he realised it was getting abit long. And unkempt. He rubbed it vigorously with a towel. He then walked into the kitchen.

Wow no one was up yet. Missy was usually an early riser. Not that she was fully awake. She'd be set there on a chair. Eyes half closed. Took her an hour before her eyes were fully open then another 30 minutes for her to form coherent sentences. Mostly the only word she could formulate was coffee. Or caffeine. The one sentance he heard her utter to Danny was give me the coffee or I will hurt you. She was well a caffeine junkie! He liked Missy. She was great. He was in such a upbeat mood at the moment. Felt happy. Stupidly insanely jovial! He brewed the liquid gold as Missy called it then made a start of breakfast. After all that was done he collected the newspaper from the porch and sat down to read.

Danny came rushing into the kitchen buttoning his shirt.

"Cool your jets Danny. Breakfast is on the hotplate. Coffee is brewed and I am awake. Life is good!"

"Ethan son. Your awake!" Danny sat beside him smiling.

"Yeah at last. I'm feeling pretty good too."

"Good." Danny replied.

"You should tell Miss to control herself then you'd get up on time." he said laughing. Where is she anyway. She's usually up well before now!"

Danny's eyes turned cloudy. "She went back to Glasgow Ethan. 3 days ago."

"O really? I'm sorry Danny."

He shrugged although Ethan could tell he was hurt. "Too much stuff to overcome son. It was just too hard for her. She's got hang ups that are 30 years old. I can't blame her. I'm disappointed but like I say I can't blame her."

Ethan nodded.

"You look a hell of a lot better son."

"What was up with me?"

"Well the doctor said you had a virus which brought on a high fever. The bumps on your head didn't like it like. Basically they said your body went into a coma like state to allow it to recover fully. Lexi was so worried. Stayed by your side most of the time. Didn't sleep or eat. I was ready to ask the doctor for knock out drops for her. She looked after Zoey and cared or you single handed. I would have helped but the surgery has had me rushed off my feet. There was a rabies scare and everyone wanted their house pets inoculated. Jared her manager is pissed coz she's missed so much work. She told him you needed her. There was a short curt reply which I didn't hear but after that she told him to go to hell and take his dog with him."

Ethan laughed. "His dog?"

Danny shrugged smiling. "I have no idea!"

He heard Zoey snuffling. "I'm needed." Ethan said. Eager to see his daughter awake.

Made his way to Zoey's room. Reached her bedroom door the same time Lexi did.

"What are you doing out of bed?" She asked.

"What is it with woman trying to get me into bed? Am I that irresistible?"

Lexi rolled her eyes.

"Ethan!" she said.

"Lets try this again Lex. How about good morning Ethan. You look well!" he suggested smiling as he walked into their daughters room.

"Yada yada." she muttered following him. "Get back to bed!" she told him sternly.

"Not in front of Zoey Lex. You trying to scar her for life?" he said shocked, a twinkle in his soft brown eyes.

"You have your happy head on today then?"

"You have no idea Lex." kissed her lips once. Picked his daughter up. "Daddy is stupidly insanely happy today Miss Zoey!" Blew a raspberry on her cheek.

"Ethan Zoey has a session at nursery today." Lexi said.

"Ok." he took Zoey to the kitchen after he changed her. Placed her in her high chair. Went to the fridge and filled her a beaker of milk "I can watch her." he suggested.

"I was going over to the house today actually."

He froze. His back to her.

"They are still trying to figure out what caused the blaze. Well that was 2 days ago. They might know now."

"It was Tapas. He used some sort of accelerant!" he said coldly.

"I know." she agreed. "He's disappeared. No one can find him."

"I will!" Ethan vowed. "Then he'll get what he deserves."

"Ethan no please!" Lexi pleaded.

"If he wants to take pot shots at me fine! When he involves you and Zoey that's when it goes too far! You two are innocent in all of this. If he gets away with this what happens next time huh? He's got this coming. And a lot more! It's too bad I can only kill him once!"

He closed his eyes as a sharp pain pierced his skull.

"God why are these still happening?" he muttered.

"Ethan?" Lexi asked.

"I keep on getting these sharp shooting pains in my head. They're blinding in intensity. They only last a minute or so. Less."

"We should…" she started.

"No Lex. I don't go to hospital till he is caught. Leave you two vulnerable like that. No!"

Lexi gave up. Didn't want to cause another argument. "Zoey wa…" Lexi stopped herself. God she nearly told Ethan that Zoey took her first steps yesterday unaided. He'd be gutted he missed it so she decided to keep it quiet.

"She's really missed you. She pined for you yesterday. I had no idea a baby could pine for someone. But she did. Full on daddies girl."

He walked around and out his arm around Lexi's waist. "Didn't I tell you, daddy's are best. Except for mummy's of course." he whispered in her ear. She turned and put her arms around his neck . He kissed her softly. Lovingly. Didn't notice someone walk into the kitchen.

"Excuse me please. Yuck! I want to eat my breakfast not be sick on it!" Daniel said dryly. "Save that till I'm out of sight yeah?" he looked at Zoey. "My poor niece having to see that too. Don't worry Zoey. Uncle Dee Jay will save you."

"Dee ay" Zoey gurgled happily.

"How cool is that?" Daniel asked. "She just said my name. Amie is gonna be well jealous!"

Daniel spread jam on his toast.

"Where is Amie?" Lexi asked.

Ethan was kissing her cheek. Then whispered in her ear.

Daniel looked at him distastefully. "Shower. I heard her singing some song she made up yesterday."

Lexi giggled at something Ethan said.

"God I am trying to have breakfast here." Daniel said in disgust took a theatrical bite from his toast.

"Ok mate. I'm only messing with you. I told her to laugh."

Daniel nodded. Realised that he had a man here who knew woman and could help him with a little problem he had. Well 2 problems actually.

"Ethan can I talk to you. You know man to man."

"Yeah sure. What about?" he asked and dived trying to stop Zoey putting mashed up wheetabix in her hair. He missed and she patted it happily. He grinned at her and Zoey smiled back. He melted.

"Well Eth it's sorta private you know." Daniel said. Transfixed on his toast.

"O yeah that's fine."

"Now?" Daniel asked.

"Lex you can deal with the wheetabix in the hair. I'm gonna go and talk to Daniel. Thanks mate you save me from a Zoey tantrum."

"Just coz she's like you." Daniel said smiling.

"Yeah that's what scares me!" Ethan said as they walked away.

**A/N ooo what does Daniel wanna say to Ethan the mind boggles and Ethan is still on his revenge trip. Protect your family Ethan!**


	45. Brotherly Love

**Martine McBride - I Love You**

_I can't believe  
__That this is real  
__The way is feel  
__Baby i've gone head over heels.  
__And i'm in so totally wrapped up  
__Emotionally attracted so physically actin  
__So recklessly i need you  
__So desperately sure as the sky is blue yeah  
__baby i love you_

_(X)_

Ethan and Daniel walked in companionable silence. Ethan knew he would start when he wanted and as a therapist he knew the benefit of silence.

"Ethan." Daniel said.

"Yeah."

Daniel looked at the floor. Scuffed the toe of his slipper on the dirt. "How do you make a girl fall in love with you?"

Ethan grinned. "You got a crush?"

"No not me!"

Ethan grinned wider at his vehement denial.

"It's not me honest." Well he did like a girl but this wasn't for him.

"Well to answer your question you can't make a girl love you. They either do or they don't."

"O." Daniel said and sat on a log lost in thought.

"Why do you ask?" Ethan asked in his soft tone. He used his confide in me therapists voice. Always worked like a charm.

"It's dad. He misses Melissa. I thought if we could make her love him again then she'd come back then he'd cheer up. He was like this after mum died. He looks lost. I dunno what to do. I wanna help but…" he trailed off.

He sure is his fathers son! Ethan thought. He's a protector.

"Look Daniel Missy does love your dad." Sat on the log beside him. Rested his elbows on his knees. "There's other stuff. Adult stuff that even me and Lex don't know about. Private stuff between the two of them. That has made her go away. She needs to sort out what is worrying her before her and your dad can be together."

Daniel nodded. "You sure there's not a way to make a girl love you?" he asked.

"You having problems?" Ethan again asked in his therapists tone.

"Well in my class there this girl."

Ethan grinned. There always was. Story as old as time. Boy meets girl. Boy gets confused about girl. Boy goes insane trying to understand girl.

"She's older than me. 10. She gets me in trouble all the time. Then we argue. But see I like her. Her smile gives me butterflies and she smiles at me all the time."

"Don't worry about it Daniel."

"But…"

"That's the only advice I can give you mate." it was only get worse with girls from here on in. Now that he had noticed them anyway. Best not tell him that though. Don't want to worry the poor boy.

"Did girls get you in trouble?"

He thought back to Lexi. Freak show and beanpole. The Shay fiasco at school. The kissing incident when he told Danny. Tristan. "O yeah!" he told him.

"Did it not annoy you? Make you angry?"

"Well there was this one girl who got me in trouble. At the time I was angry but not really I was just happy that she knew I was alive. Then she'd smile at me and I'd forget my own name."

"God can you not talk about Lexi in that manner in front of me!" Daniel said in disgust.

"Who said it was Lex?" Ethan asked.

Daniel looked across at him and raised his eyebrows.

"Ok. Ok." Ethan conceded.

"If she got you in trouble why you still with her?" Daniel asked confused.

"Coz I love her. Really love her. Always have."

"How do you show a girl you like her?" Daniel asked.

"This the one who got you in trouble?"

Daniel nodded.

"You could tell her." Ethan suggested. "Or a poem or a letter. Girls love, love letters."

Daniel made a face. "Should I get her in trouble back?"

Ethan laughed. "You are a brave man! That could end one of two ways."

Daniel frowned.

"She'll either be thrilled that you like her back."

"Or." Daniel asked.

"She'll go completely mental that you got her in trouble."

Daniel exhaled then groaned. "Are girls always so hard?"

"Like you wouldn't believe. It only gets worse mate trust me!"

They got up and started walking back to the house. "How did you know Lexi liked you back?" Daniel then kicked a pebble.

"At first I didn't know. I thought I just liked her when we were younger. When we got older I knew by the way she acted and the stuff she said."

And the sexual tension that crackled between them. Definitely keeping that quiet though!

Daniel frowned again. He had did that a lot with this conversation.

"Your too young to be worrying about girls mate. Tryst me when you're a teenager you'll spend far too many hours trying to figure out what they are thinking. I'll tell you what I figured out. Don't even try to get in a girls head. It is a scary place and you won't leave with your sanity intact. I worry about my own sanity. I have a daughter!"

Daniel smiled.

"Just be a kid for now yeah."

"Hey Eth. Don't mention this to my dad huh?"

Ethan shook his head. "Don't worry. My lips are sealed."

"One last thing?" Daniel asked.

Ethan nodded.

"How do you know the difference between liking a girl and loving her?"

Ethan thought. "I guess I knew when I was certain that I'd do anything she asked. And I mean anything. Even if it meant hurting myself in the process. When I realised I couldn't breath with her gone. I could be standing in a crowded room and the only person I could see was her. And if I had to die to save her life I'd do it without thinking twice."

Daniel stared at him for a second. "Wow you feel that way about Lexi?"

"Yeah I do times 500 billion. The same applies to Zoey too. So do you feel like that about you know who?"

Daniel shook his head.

"Good. Your WAY too young to fall in love. Make sure you wait till your 20. One piece of advice. Treat every girl like a princess!"

Daniel nodded. "Thanks Ethan."

"Anytime mate. I'm always here."

Ethan smiled widely as he walked into the house.

"Ok Zoey time for nursery my princess."

She lifted her arms for her daddy. Lexi was sat at the table wearing wheetabix. He bit back a grin.

"What happened to you? You need to borrow Lexi's bibs?"

She glared at him playfully. "All I'm gonna say is that she is SO your daughter!"

He looked at Zoey and picked her up. She was wearing a lemon sundress with sandals and a hat. God he loved this little girl so much. Her mother too. Lexi came beside him after changing clothes.

"Thank you." he said softly.

She was confused. "For what?"

"Being here. Loving me. Our daughter. Everything. How long you got?"

She smiled and pressed a kiss to his lips.

"I love you so much Lexi. Always."

"Me too Ethan."

"We gonna get married then?" he asked seriously.

"That is a seriously half assed proposal Ethan." she joked thinking he was kidding.

"Came from deep within my heart." he told her.

She smiled.

"Will you marry me Lex?" he repeated looking at her intensely. "I really mean it. No jokes."

Her breath caught. A ecstatic grin spread across her face. "Of course I will! I was getting impatient waiting for you to ask. I was ready to ask you!"

He smiled. "A modern woman. You want the ring yet?"

"You can give it to me later in private." she wiggled her eyebrows. She lowered her voice. Moved her head close to his. "Make a start on our next child too." she whispered.

"Really? I thought you wanted to work."

They walked from the house and he put Zoey in the car to take her to nursery.

"Definitely. I thought I lost you. Then you thought you lost me. No more kid stuff between us. We belong together. And I could have 50 babies and I couldn't care as long as they are all yours!"

He grinned at her.

"I do have one condition though!" she added.

"What?"

"I want a Ethan junior!"

He leant over in the car and kissed her. "I'll try my best."

They drove to the nursery smiling happily. Everything was going right for a change.

**A/N the lex ethan relationship is finally going good and they wnt b breakin up this time. :) x**

**and ethan bein a big bro wi daniel awww daniel is cute and getting all confused ova girls.**

**PS this chapter was supposed to b called brotherly love. not the other one - sorry x**


	46. Mini Leopards Den

Ethan and Lexi had been at Mini Leopards Den for an hour. When they first arrived they had stood their hands clasped as they stared at the ruins of their house. It was a blackened shell. Ethan kept wandering in a circle with a paper in his hands making notes. An envelope with the arsons expert report inside it. He read it quickly.

"It was definitely attempted murder Lex." he took her to the bottom of the porch. "I'm no expert but see those scorch marks? Evidence of accelerants. The report says the worst of it being the outer walls of Zoey's room and bedroom door."

Ethan's fists were clenched tightly.

"So is any of this saveable?" Lexi asked.

Ethan shrugged. "We might have to tear it down and start again. We'll see."

"Does our home insurance cover this?"

He nodded. "Since we have proof it's arson."

Lexi stared at their house again. "I loved this place." she murmured. "It might have been small and shabby but it was ours. A present off mum."

"Yeah. I'm gonna have a talker to some builders. Try to salvage as much of the original structure as possible." he scribbled notes down.

She nodded. Ran her hand through her tousled blond hair.

"Right I'll take some measurements. Make some more notes. Any extra's you wanted coz I'm gonna do a preliminary sketch."

"It was perfect the way it was. Actually an en suite would be nice." she told him smiling.

"Why? So you can accost me in the shower. I see a psycho moment in my future!" he made a fist and made a stabbing motion with the high pitched shrill psycho music.

"Yeah." she laughed. "First the accosting then the duh duh duh duh!" she repeated the music too.

Ethan copied the face Janet Leigh played in the shower scene with his hands on his cheeks.

She laughed and walked towards him. He met her halfway.

"Hey." he whispered enclosing her in his arms. "There is a hut near here. We could go and…" he whispered in her ear.

"Oooo now that does sound promising but we need stuff sorted with the house today. With the Township being rebuilt we need to get a builder ASAP before they are otherwise disposed. Who knows how long we'll have to wait!"

He kissed her deeply. Pulled back. "Ok. Giz the tape measure."

"Me? You were gonna pick it up!" Lexi said.

"No Lexi honey. I asked you to."

"Ethan you said I'll grab the tape measure honey."

"No I said grab the tape measure honey." he retorted.

"O." she said with a smile.

"C'mon we'll head to Leopards Den. Get it." he said grinning wickedly.

"No way. We pass those huts. You have no restraint around me. I'll be in there so fast my head will be spinning!" she said cockily. Eyes twinkling playfully.

"Well your gorgeous!" he said seriously.

"I'll go." she said.

"No. Tapas might be around. I won't have the risk!" he said stubbornly.

"he's disappeared Ethan. I'll be straight back. Honest."

He frowned. Eyes darted from left to right. Frown deepened then face turn neutral.

"You do that preliminary sketch yeah? Add plenty of bedrooms."

He nodded. "Go on then." he conceded quickly.

"You gave in too fast. What's up?"

"I'm just sure you'll be fine. Take your time."

Her eyes narrowed. This wasn't like him! What was he planning?

"Go on." he kissed her softly. "Love you."

She nodded. He guided her in the direction of Leopards Den.

He waited till she was out of earshot. Swivelled and yelled.

"You can come out now. I know your there Tapas!"

Silence.

Ethan crossed his arms. "Come and face me like a man or do you only attack defenceless babies and woman?"

Silence.

"I knew you weren't man enough to face me!"

There was a rustle and Tapas walked out of the bush carrying a clear bottle of fluid.

"You went after my baby girl Tapas!" he hissed. "No matter I did she was innocent!"

"Why did you send Lexi away Ethan?"

"She doesn't need to see what I'm about to do!" Ethan retorted in a deadly tone.

"No witnesses then Ethan?"

"Not at all. I'll tell people what I did and why!" he said proudly.

"So you don't want her seeing the real you. The violent monster!"

"She'll understand why I did this!" Ethan said taking a step towards him.

"You'll leave them unprotected? Kill me and you'll go down. Leaving the door wide opened for a few of my good friends. And they won't be willing to stop at just hurting them!"

"Your full of crap Tapas."

"Don't believe me then." he said smugly.

Ethan froze. Unsure because of the cocky look on his face.

"You know it was pretty easy you know. I expected more of you. It was too simple to get into your house. Flimsy locks."

Ethan's eyes darkened.

"Imagine the fun I could have had if Lexi had of been in the house. Pretty girl your Lexi." he nodded appreciatively. "Very pretty. Obviously full of passion if the way she kissed you was any indication."

Ethan felt sick at the thought of him watching them. Then what he said penetrated his brain. "You bastard!" he strode towards him.

"O yeah have my fun and done a runner with cute little Zoey."

Ethan reached him and swung hard. Tapas ducked and smiled. "Too obvious Ethan!" Ethan kept swinging but missing. He was getting frustrated and his punches were sloppy. He finally connected with Tapas jaw but he was enraged by now and breathing heavily. Tapas grunted. They were soon brawling. Ethan getting the best until a sharp pain pierced his skull. He froze and grabbed the top of his head in pain. Tapas hit Ethan at the base of his skull. Knocked him out with one blow. Ethan slid boneless to the floor. Was sprawled on his stomach.

Tapas rubbed his jaw. It ached from the blow it received. He grabbed the bottle of fluid which had rolled away. Nothing was going wrong this time!

"I've got you now Eth!" he said the name with a sneer. "This is all your fault you know." he spoke to the unconscious Ethan. "If you had just gave me my job back this could have all been avoidable. But NO! hot shot firefighter from New Zealand swans in and takes everything from me!"

Tapas was bent over yelling at the back of Ethan's head. "They should have sacked you. Those idiot directors. Especially after what you done to me. You did wonders in there they told me. The place runs like a well oiled machine. Your creativity and ideas are a breath of fresh air. Their words not mine. Saint Ethan!" he spat venomously. "Well drastic times call for drastic measures"

Tapas paced agitated. He smiled at the thought of his plan and shook the bottle. Bbq'ed Ethan. He'd definitely die this time. He watch him to make sure. Well done. Overdone! He smiled at his dark humour. He unscrewed the bottle and poured it all on Ethan dousing his head and body. Shook the final drops on him then threw the bottle away.

Tapas heard footsteps and saw Lexi walking through the bush. O this was too good. She could watch. Helpless! He smiled menacingly at her.

"What have you done to him?" she yelled looking at Ethan's unmoving body.

"Stay back Lexi!" he warned darkly.

"Go to hell Tapas." jogged towards them. Tapas removed his metal lighter smiled evilly. It was then Lexi smelled the pungent odour of petrol. She looked at Ethan again. Oh God! He was soaked through lying in a puddle. His clothes doused. Her heart started pounding erratically. She stopped a few footsteps away from them. Her eyes ever left Ethan.

"Look Tapas put the lighter away yeah?" her voice shook with fear.

"No." he said and laughed maniacally.

He flicked the flame and looked at it. Lowered it slightly. Lexi's heart stopped and she paled. "NO DON'T!" she screamed. He blew the flame out.

Her eyes glistened and her breathing was laboured.

Tapas was enjoying playing with her.

"What's the matter Lex. Will you not love him if he isn't so pretty anymore."

She bit back a angry retort. Try to keep him calm. If she got him angry he could snap. " Tapas. Tell me what you want. I'll sort it. I swear just don't…" she exhaled. "Just put the lighter away. Don't put it so close to him!" her voice was almost incoherent with how much it wobbled. Her hands were up trying to reason with him.

"I want him dead! I only wanted to hurt him initially. You and your daughter, it isn't enough now!"

"Look I'll make him quit the fire station! You can have your job back!" she pleaded.

"You really think I can go back after this? They'll lock me up on 4 counts of attempted murder. I may as well go the whole way don't you think!"

"I'll give you the keys to a car. You can drive away and we've never seen you!" she reasoned.

He shook his head. "I like my idea better!" his wild eyes glinted with madness.

"No see if you kill him you'll never get out. If you go now and they catch you it might be guilty on a lesser charge. You might walk!" she was getting desperate. Making it up as she went along.

He flicked the flame on and off. Quicker. The light in his eyes grew and she could see he wasn't going to wait much longer!

Tapas was enjoying seeing her face as the flame lit and extinguished. She was trying so hard not to panic. To control herself and her breathing.

"Look can you not do that over him!" she squeaked.

"Awww poor Lex! You still have your child."

He lit the flame looked serious.

"WAIT!" she yelled. Her froze and looked at her.

"Um." she fumbled. "We'll move away!"

He shook his head like he didn't believe her.

She started shrugging out of her jacket. Getting ready for the worst. To smoother Ethan and starve the fire of oxygen. She looked at him pleading with him to wake up. He was out cold. She felt sick at the thought of what was going to happen to him.

"No really Tapas I swear. We'll move to Glasgow to be with my aunt." she meant every word.

"I'm sorry Lexi. Tell Zoey I'm sorry for leaving her fatherless." he paused. Smiled. "Actually no I'm not." he lit the lighter. Knelt towards Ethan.

Lexi ran towards him in what felt like slow motion. "NO!" she screamed.

**A/Nis this the end of ethan? how in the hell is he gonna get out of this? i really dnt know really! maybe he doesn't :/**


	47. Saviour?

Tapas lowered the lighter. Lexi knew she wasn't going to reach him in time to stop him. Still she had to try. The air whooshed from her lungs. Dammit Ethan it'd be a good time to wake up and move!

A rock flew from now where. Hit Tapas square in the side of the head. He dropped the lighter. With his finger not pressed on the fuel anymore the flame extinguished before it hit the floor. Someone was running towards them. Started spraying Ethan with a hose. He was sprayed in the face but didn't wake. The woman dropped the hose beside him.

Lexi was fighting with Tapas on the floor. He was on top of her struggling with her arms. Missy picked up the rock she threw and bashed Tapas over the head with it.

"That's for threatening Ethan and Lex!" she roared.

Tapas fell on Lexi. Missy pulled him off.

"O Miss thank God you're here!"

"C'mon Lex, we gotta get Ethan out of here! I've phoned the police and your dad!"

"Miss he was gonna…"

"Lex! Have your meltdown later, for now focus yeah! I have no idea how long he is gonna be out for. We need to get Ethan to safety ok!"

Lexi nodded and swallowed thickly. Took a deep breath.

"Right Lex you grab his head. I'll get his legs."

They were soon carrying Ethan to the hut. Lexi walking backwards. They struggled but somehow carried on.

"How long has he been out?" Missy asked straining.

"I have no…Miss LOOK OUT!"

Tapas was behind her and hit her in the back of the head with something heavy and hard. Missy dropped Ethan's legs and fell to her knees. Clutched her head. Tapas picked her up by her hair. Missy winced. There was something very sharp beside her throat.

Missy's breath caught at the sight of the blade. Her eyes widened. Oh God she was seriously screwed here! But she could help Lex and Ethan get away at least.

"Gimmie the keys to a car." Tapas hissed.

"As long as you leave her." Lexi bargained.

"No I'll drop her off somewhere. I heard her say she called the police I need leverage."

Lexi was conflicted.

"No Lex. Take Ethan to that place we agreed. Ignore him. If he gets me in a car he'll kill me anyway! He's capable he's proved that today!"

Lexi's eyes widened. Her face pained. She had no idea what to do.

"Zoey!" Missy yelled. "She needs you. Both of you!"

Lexi's face changed and she began dragging Ethan away.

Missy nodded. "Love you all kid!"

"Shut up bitch!" Tapas yelled to Missy.

"You go to hell. I'm seriously pissed at you anyway. One you messed up my hair and even worse than that you got blood in it!" she yelled provoking him. "Your life is in more danger messing with my hair them that knife your holding!" she warned.

"Miss don't annoy him!" Lexi said as she dragged Ethan away. She knew that Missy was only giving her a chance to get away.

"Keep moving Lex!" Missy warned. Your dad. The police she mouthed. Lexi focused and pulled harder and faster.

"I'll kill her Lexi." Tapas warned.

"Hey that's a big blade. You compensating?" Missy distracted Tapas from Lexi again.

"Shut up!" he warned looking at her.

"It's not your fault you know. There's surgery now. Or maybe you have other problems. Tell me is your wife unsatisfied?"

"BITCH!" he roared hit her on the back of the head again he fell to her knees. He didn't have a wife but he hated being critisized.

"There's Viagra too!" she advised.

He kicked her ribs.

She fell to the floor and coughed breathing heavily. "Sorry I mentioned it!" she said breathless.

Tapas looked around. Saw he and Missy were alone. Everything was silent. "Where are they? WHERE ARE THEY?" he yelled angrily.

"I have no idea!" she laughed weakly.

"BITCH!" he roared again.

"That's getting old. There are other swear words. You wanna few suggestions?"

Tapas picked Missy up by the roots of her hair. She was in his face.

"Didn't I warn you about my hair old man!" she told him icily.

He ignored her. "Tell me where they're gone. I know you know!"

Missy wrinkled her nose. "Seriously you need a tic tac. I got polo's in my pocket if you want one!"

He slapped her with his free hand.

Missy face stung. She shook her head to clear the ringing in her ears.

"I'll never tell you where they are!" she told him happily. He released her hair and slapped her again.

O she was pissed now! Slapped him back.

Tapas stared at her open mouthed.

"Didn't your mother ever tell you don't hit unless you expect to be hit back!" she smiled cockily.

He raised the knife. "I have a knife you stupid…"

"Ah yes the compensatory blade. Your poor wife!" she shook her head sadly. "I feel for her I truly do!"

His face contorted and she he uppercut her to the jaw. She wasn't expecting it. She went sprawling onto the dirt. Her vision blurred and she groaned automatically.

"I'll show you a real man!" he raged. "I'll show you compensatory!"

He reached for the button of his jeans. Stood over her and smiled evilly. His words penetrated her foggy haze. She had a flashback to her uncle stood over her wearing that same expression.

Missy saw red. Was beyond enraged. She wasn't a kid anymore. She could fight back. If this guy thought she was gonna let him…. She was on her feet in a second. Fists clenched. Face livid. Fists clenched tightly. Breathing heavily

"C'mon then big man!" she fumed. Pushed him. He stumbled back.

"Try it!" she yelled. Pushed him again.

"I have a knife!" he warned.

"Use it then!" she wasn't thinking straight. The only thought that was in her mind was that this wasn't happening to her again. No man was ever doing that to her again. NO MAN!

She pushed him again.

Tapas looked worried. Unsure.

"Use this knife then! I'm pushing you aren't I?"

She was shacking with anger. "You have the nerve to come here and threaten my family. Threaten me with a knife? You small little man!" she sreamed at him. Eyes black with rage.

He raised the knife.

"Do it then! I'll never tell you where they are and as for anything else you'll have to kill me. That is never happening to me!" she warned.

Tapas stared at her.

"Your not man enough to do it are you?" Missy breathing was laboured. "I knew it. No wonder your wife is disappointed. Not much of a man. A husband or anything else!"

She didn't hear the car pull up. "MISSY!" a voice yelled.

"You so picked the wrong person to threaten!" she told him.

Tapas waved the blade at her. It scratched her arm but she was save from serious injury by moving. She swung her right hand and it connected on his jaw. He took a step back dazed. She flung a left. He stumbled and slipped on a stone.

She was above him ready to pummel him. He was no longer Tapas he was Andy and she finally had her chance for revenge after all these years.

(X)

Danny climbed from a car and heard Missy goading Tapas. "Not much of a man, a husband or anything else!" he heard her say. Oh my god has she lost her mind. He has a knife and she's saying stuff like that. He looked at her face. She didn't look like his Missy. She looked… well he wouldn't wanna be up against that and he was being honest. Tapas waved the knife and scratched her. Danny ran over quickly Tapas was on the floor after a few choice hits from her. She was over him and got to hits to his face.

"Never again!" she screamed. Her hand was a blur. Just kept hitting downwards. Danny grabbed her under her arms and pulled her up. Just in time. Tapas drove the blade upwards as Danny lifted. He would have stabbed her straight through the heart. The police were here too. Lexi came running from the bush.

Tapas was on the ground. An officer beside him.

Lexi was beside her in a second. Danny still restrained her although she wasn't fighting. She just stared at the man on the floor. Looking deadly.

"Dad Ethan is in hut 3 go check on for me. He's lucid barely."

Danny nodded and hurried away. "Well talk later Miss." he promised.

"Missy!" Lexi breathed. "I heard everything you said, are you out of your mind?" Lexi engulfed her in a hug.

Missy's anger had begun to ebb and she felt tired.

"You got away didn't you." Missy replied hugging her back.

"How's Ethan?"

"Like I said. Lucid. Dad's going over as you know. Just to make sure he's ok. I had to get back here, I had to make sure he didn't hurt you. I hated leaving you Miss."

"I told you too. You had you and Ethan and Zoey to think of."

"Oh God Miss if it weren't for you.." she pulled away and looked at her.

Missy shook her head.

There was shouting and yelling a short way away from them. Lexi and Missy looked towards Tapas. He had a gun in his hand pointed at Lexi. About to fire. There was an explosion as he pulled the trigger. Blood splattered and a body hit the floor.

**A/N ok whose been hit there is a possibilty of tapas lexi or missy ok give me your ideas :) thanks 4 reading. not long till the end now. x**


	48. Is She Or Isn't She?

**Rascal Flatts - See Me Through (Missy POV)**

_I know sometimes I let you down_  
_But I'm still getting used to having you around_  
_And if I ever_  
_Make you cry_  
_There's nothing I won't do_  
_To make things right_  
_I'm not perfect thats for sure _  
_A little time is all I'm asking for_

_(X)_

"OW! It hurts!" Missy complained holding her shoulder. Blood oozed through he gauze she held there. Soaked her finger. "Last time I push you outta the way!" Missy moaned to Lexi. "Next time you can take it!" she said voice wobbling. Betraying how she felt. She was being flip but inside she still felt the gut wrenching fear when she saw Tapas pointing the gun at Lexi.

Lexi and Missy were sat in the ambulance. Both of their eyes were glistening.

After they looked at Tapas everything had happened so fast. Missy had turned and pushed Lexi out of the way. Unfortunately her shoulder had been in the bullets path. The force of the impact had caused her to fall to the floor, blood splattered on her face. Lexi over her thinking she'd been shot in the neck initially. The amount of blood she had been covered in was unreal. It had covered her neck and shoulder and down her arm. Tapas had been quickly cuffed and taken away.

"Why did you do that Miss?" Lexi asked. "He was gonna shoot me and you …." Lexi trailed off.

"I have no idea Lex…coz I…I knew you'd be able to patch me up I suppose." she tried to joke but failed miserably.

Missy took a deep breath and released it shakily. "He was gonna shoot you Lex. Your dad couldn't lose you too. And your mum, I did it for her too. She wouldn't hesitate if it was my kid. And Zoey and Ethan they need you." Tears fell and her voice broke. "Mostly I did it coz I love you kid. It scared the hell outta me!"

"I love you too Miss." Lexi told her seriously tears trickling down her cheeks too.

"God what's wrong with me, I never cry!" Missy said tears continuing to fall.

"It's about time you did then. A good cry is therapeutic." Lexi sniffled.

They were taken into the hospital. A new doctor was in. Lexi didn't recognise him.

"Family only!" the doctor said.

"She's my mum!" Lei said stubbornly. Had a determined set to her jaw, warning the doctor if he tried to shift her all hell would break loose.

The doctor looked between them. He was dubious but nodded and left.

Missy was given pain relief. Stitched up after they ascertained there was no permanent damage. Lexi spoke to her the entire time.

They were finally alone.

"You are a second mum to me Miss. I love you like a mum." Lexi blurted before Miss could speak. "And I owe you far more than I'll ever be able to repay. Firstly Ethan and then me."

"No Lex don't talk like that. You owe me nothing. Honestly nothing at all."

Danny walked passed the doctor. Straight into her cubicle and hugged Missy and Lexi at the same time. Missy hissed in pain.

"Oh Miss I'm sorry!" he said. "I just heard what happened."

"I'm gonna tell you what I told Lex. No more. Anyone else gets shot and I'm standing well clear!"

"Missy." Danny started.

"Danny don't." she said softly. "Lexi knows why I did it." she said seriously. "I just hated to ruin her cute white jumper!"

"Do you want a coffee dad?" Lexi asked. Sensing her dad and Missy needed time alone.

"Yeah please. Lex." he said. As soon as she was gone he turned to Missy.

"Missy."

She put her hand up to silence him. "No, just no right!" her voice and hand shook. She tried to sound firm but she sounded pitiful. She closed her eyes. "I'm not a good person ok. Wrong place wrong time." swallowed the tightness in her throat. Her shaking hand was rested on her forehead.

"I saw Alice Danny." a tear fell. "For a second it was Alice stood there. And he couldn't shoot Alice. Then I saw Lex and it was like no he definitely can't shoot Lex." she breathed trying to rein in her tears. "As I pushed her she thanked me. Alice thanked me! God he was gonna kill her Danny." she swiped at the tears. Trying to stop them.

"C'mere Miss." he enclosed her I his arms. She broke down. "I couldn't let him kill her Danny. Not Alice's little girl."

He nodded. She cried silent tears into his shirt. For a while there was no noise.

Missy pulled back. "I knew I should have stayed in Glasgow." she said with a half laugh half sob. "I've been back all of 3 hours and I've been threatened with a knife et cetera. Shot. Beaten up. God that's a record even for me" she decided not to tell him what Tapas threatened to do, why she lost it completely. She was back in his strong embrace and that's all that mattered. She drew strength from his strong arms. God she loved him so much!

"You know Ethan will give you whatever you ask for now. Not only did you save him you saved Lexi too!" Danny stated.

"I didn't do anything."

"That's not how the cops are telling it. You saved my kids Miss."

"Danny no." she asked as a plea. She hated it when people made her out to be better than she was.

"I swear I'll shut up. I just HAVE to thank you. There is nothing I will ever say or do that could repay what you did for me today!"

"I do it all the time." Missy said nonchalantly. "Super woman suit underneath."

"No Miss I'm not joking I mean it."

She nodded. "I'm being serious here Danny it wasn't much. I didn't mean their lives aren't much. Their lives are everything. I know that you'd do it for me. Alice would have done it for me. I didn't hesitate. It didn't enter my head not to do it coz I love them too."

Lexi walked in with the coffee.

An hour passed. Missy's eyes grew glazed over and her smile was wide and wicked. she had been given some morphine.

"Hey Danny you know you said about Ethan?" her voice was singsong. "About how he'd give me anything?"

"Yeah." Danny said.

"Do you think he'd…na it's stupid." she giggled to herself.

"Go on." Danny urged. Missy off her head on painkillers. This was good for a laugh.

"Do you think Ethan would let me play with the fire hose on his fire engine?"

Danny and Lexi stared at her.

"She's had too many drugs dad." Lexi said seriously.

"Definitely!" he agreed.

"No honestly I've always wanted to! You know on films when the person holding the hose goes flying around in the air coz of the water pressure. It'd be soooooooo cool! Like being on a rollercoaster!" Missy was smiling and giggling. "Hehe me flying."

Lexi and Danny just continued staring at her open mouthed.

Missy looked at them. "No go then?" she asked sadly.

"Your insane." Danny said.

"Thank you." Missy replied.

"Certifiable." Lexi added.

"Oooo the compliments are coming thick and fast today!"

"Miss Lynch." a doctor said stiffly walking in. looked at Danny. "Who are you sir?"

Missy giggled. "It's grand central station in here!"

"He's my dad." Lexi cut in before Missy could say something stupid and get him sent away.

The doctor nodded. "Your mum is fine to go home now. I have a prescription, antibiotics for here. Here is a strong painkiller for her to take the edge off tonight."

"Oooo smarties." Missy said happily.

"Shut up miss!" Lexi elbowed her.

"Hey I took a bullet for you. Shouldn't you be grovelling. My slave or something?" Missy asked playfully.

Danny was looking at Lexi intently. He heard the doctor call Missy Lexi's mum. Lexi hadn't flickered. Hadn't told him different. Danny didn't know how he felt about that!

Missy had taken her tablet. They were in the car.

"Was that a sleeping tablet?" Missy asked drowsily. Was blinking trying to stay awake.

"You should have heard Miss dad. She had a screw loose. She was provoking him to give me and Ethan a chance to get away. Seriously I thought he was gonna kill her!"

"The usual. Never had my screws tightened. Should think about it actually." Missy muttered sleepily. No humour in her tone.

"She pelted a rock at him. Perfect aim. Right in the side of his head. She then hosed Ethan down and then whacked him in the head with a brick. She was well pissed."

"I had good right to be. He hurt you." she again muttered.

"So then right I'm nearly cracking up and she's like calm Lex we have to get away from here. We were carrying Ethan away when he appeared behind her and whacked her in the head. Held a knife to her throat."

"I shoulda killed him for messing with my hair." Missy droned with a yawn. Started breathing slow and deep.

"After that dad. She was being funny with him. He was threatened to kill her and she was telling me to leave her. Like she was pissed off and when that didn't work she started saying he couldn't satisfy his wife. That it wasn't his fault. There was Viagra now."

Missy was silent. Asleep. Or so they assumed.

"He threatened her dad."

"Lexi!" Missy warned coldly.

"What did he threaten?"

"Don't you dare Lex!" Missy said icily. "He threatened bodily harm Danny."

"Lex?" Danny asked.

"He told her he'd…show her a real man."

Missy exhaled angrily shaking her head "He doesn't need to know that Lex!" she hissed.

It took a second for the words to penetrate his brain. He was enraged. How dare he threaten her with that! "Is that why you were so angry Miss?" he asked.

"I'd rather not talk about it thanks. I'm tired." Missy said finally. That was the last word they heard from her.

(X)

Missy was out of the car as soon as it stopped. She wobbled slightly as she walked. She went straight into the spare room and closed the door.

Ethan was sat in the kitchen. Lexi ran to him and engulfed him in a big hug. Danny wass till outside cooling off. Lexi clutched Ethan tightly. He the same with her. He kissed her long and slow and deep. Rested his forehead on hers. Cupped her cheek with one hand.

"Dupe and Caroline have the kids. Zoey too. Reporters have been hanging around. They want an exclusive from Miss. Hero of the hour."

"We owe her so much Eth."

"I know!" Ethan agreed.

"Are you ok?" he asked.

"Nothing actually happened to me. But when I looked down the barrel of that gun…" she shivered. "I've never known fear like that. The only fear that scared me more was when I thought I had lost you. I genuinely thought he was gonna kill me. Then I was a few feet from where I was and Missy was face down on the floor beside me. She was covered in blood Eth. Her face. Her neck. Her arm. See it was an in and out. Bullet went clean through. I thought she'd been hit in the neck. Couldn't breathe. Before I even turned her I was imagining treatment for her. I was terrified."

"How'd Tapas get a gun?"

"Best I can tell is that a stupid cop had his gun holstered but unbuttoned. Tapas pulled it out and the rest as they say…" she told him.

"I thought Missy was in Glasgow." he told her.

"We all did. She just turned up." Lexi said thankfully.

"Thank God huh?" he asked.

"Yes." she agreed and hugged him tightly again.

(X)

Missy lay on her bed. Her left shoulder raised slightly to keep her right off the bed. She had her eyes closed. The medication made her drowsy. She wanted to sleep. She yawned. God she hoped Danny didn't come in when she was like this. She couldn't lie! There was a soft knock.

"You awake?" he asked.

"No." she replied.

He laughed as he entered the room.

"I told you I was asleep."

"For some reason Miss I didn't believe you."

Her eyes were half open as she lay on the bed. "G'night." she murmured.

"I came to check your temp."

She nodded. Lay quietly. Drifted in-between the land of sleep and awake.

"I love you Danny." she said absently.

"I love you Miss. For always." He removed the thermometer from her mouth.

She smiled. Loved his soft green eyes. She smiled dreamily. "I hope our baby has your eyes." her hand was rested on her stomach.

His jaw went slack and he dropped the thermometer to the floor. No way! She'd come back coz… but no, they were careful he knew it. They hadn't slipped once!

"Miss are you pregnant?" he asked.

She breathed slow and deep. He shook her softly. "Miss are you having a baby?"

"Baby Trevanion…." she muttered. "Alice dream." her eyes never opened. "Mum?" she asked then quieted completely.

He stared at her a while. Then smiled at the thought her of her pregnant. She was gonna be a brill mum. She already mothered his kids to death!

Missy had settled into a content slumber. Mot moving until the next morning.

**A/N is she or isn't she. She did come back rather suddenly remember ooooo :D**


	49. Back

**Colbie Caillat - Stay With Me**

_I will help you keep your smile  
__Promise me you'll stay a while.  
__Stay with me  
__Promise me your never gonna leave  
__Stay with me yeah  
__Let's try thr best we can be  
__Take our time._

(X)

Missy awoke slowly. Her shoulder throbbed with an intensity. She sat up too quickly felt pain burn in her shoulder. She had a powdery acidic taste in her mouth. Her stomach rolled.

Oh no! she thought and dashed to the bathroom.

(X)

Danny awoke. Dressed quickly and went to check on Missy. He walked into he room and found her bed empty. Her heard some one vomiting. He emerged from her room to see her looking pale walking from the bathroom. She shuffled her feet across the floor.

He smiled. "Good morning."

"What's so good about it?" she mumbled grumpily. Hand on her stomach.

"Aw poor Miss. You want some painkillers?"

She shook her head. She felt so down for some reason. Then again that wasn't the best way to be woken!

"C'min the room for a minute yeah?" he held her hand and guided her in their room.

"How's your shoulder?" he asked softly.

"Sore." she grumbled. "I'll live though."

"You got anything to tell me?" he hinted.

"No." she said simply. "O." realisation dawned. "You wanna know why I came back?"

He nodded thinking the baby was the reason.

"Well you see Danny I was in Glasgow and it didn't feel like home anymore. I missed you all." she smiled. "I've never missed a man before. It was weird." she paused. "I ran into Karl too. He wanted to reconcile."

He frowned. "I hope you told him to go to hell!" he fumed.

"Well I went out with him, not on a date or anything but we spent time talking over coffee."

"Why?" Danny asked jealously.

"Coz he's my friend. For old times sake. He is a friend Danny and I don't like your tone!" she hissed. Karl was the one who had convinced her to come back to him. He had wished her well and said that he was happy she had found someone.

He crossed his arms angrily. "And what did you talk about? Old times?" he sneered.

"Well yes actually we did! You got a problem with that?"

"Yes I do actually. You should have been here with me instead of reminiscing with him!"

"Well I wasn't!"

"Have you got any idea how much I missed you? No coz we didn't hear a word from you!"

"I was busy at work!"

"And going out on dates with ex boyfriends!"

"It wasn't a date!" she retorted.

"Sure sounds like one!" he fumed.

"Go away and calm down Danny I don't wanna talk to you like this! I've never seen this jealous possessive side to you before and I don't necessarily like it! So get out of my face ok!"

He stood up. "How do you expect me to react. I thought you loved me! Except you were swanning around Glasgow going out on dates with ex's!"

She opened her mouth to let rip. Then calmed her self. Took a deep calming breath. "Right let's clarify a few facts here Daniel. I didn't go out with ex's. It was singular. Only Karl and for one coffee and it's the least I owe him coz we had been together for years. We were both gutted when it finished and I do still care for him ok! And two I have been extremely busy with work. Setting up a permanent manager for my business. I told her that I wouldn't be around unless for emergency's coz I have family commitments now in South Africa. Not that I have to explain my self to you."

He opened his mouth to reply then her words penetrated. "Family commitments?"

"Well yeah. You and Amie and Daniel and Lexi and Ethan and Zoey. Family."

"And?" he asked. Anger gone sitting beside her.

"And I love you." she said softly.

"And?" he repeated.

"And I'll never leave you again." she added. Wondering what he wanted to hear. She was running out of things to say.

She wasn't getting it! Danny thought. "I know Miss." he told her gently.

"Oooo what do you know tell me! I never could wait to know secrets!" she said excitedly.

"I know and I'm chuffed to bits. I thought it might take a while but it seems that I'm running true to form."

She looked confused. "You've lost me Danny."

"Your pregnant!" he said happily.

Her jaw slackened. Her eyes glazed over with sheer terror. Her eyes dropped to her stomach then lifted to his face. "Am I hell!" she yelped.

He was smiling at her.

"Trust me I'm not pregnant. Where the hell did you get an idea like that from? Are you trying to kill me from a heart attack?"

"But Miss you said last night…" he started.

"Danny I was on morphine and the strong painkillers. Those two combined with the fact I have no tolerance for that stuff mean I'd tell you anything. I swear I get delirious from paracetamols. If the dose was high enough I'd be telling you my parents were black priests. Or that I'm an alien from Mars. You hear what I'm saying honey?"

"But you were sick."

"I had acid in my mouth. Yuck!"

He was disappointed. She smiled.

"Your cute but I didn't return coz you knocked me up. I returned for you coz I missed you and wanted to be with you. No baby." she shook her head. "Yet. That is if you still want one."

"You bet." he whispered. "And marriage?" he added.

She frowned. "How about we take it a day at a time huh? I sorted some stuff in my head but there's still stuff there that'll take time. I'll get there eventually." she told him.

He nodded.

"And! Do you think your superman or something? We only slept together a few times and we used protection too. God I can't tell you how often I slipped with Karl and it never happened!" she laughed.

"I have it on good authority it can happen after one time. I did it twice!" he said proudly. "How do you think Lex is here?"

"WHAT?" she gasped.

"Of course I was a lot younger then!" he told her.

"You've scared me Danny. Once?" she whispered in disbelief.

"Hey. Don't worry or stress!"

"I thought I would have had time to get used to the idea!"

"We can put it off." he suggested.

She frowned. Knew if she out it off then they'd never have a child. "Ignore me." she said. "Just a moment of panic no make that terror. Can you imagine me with a newborn? All hormonal. You'd be a nutter by the time it'd be a week old!"

"You'll be a good mum. Your great with my kids. Alice'd be well proud."

She nodded. She missed her friend. Could do with some guidance right now!

"Plus I have no intention of it happening on our first try. Where's the fun in that?" he whispered.

"I agree." she murmured in reply. He kissed her softly.

**A/N ok so missy isn't pregnant. Katie Trevanion u were right :) :) :) just thought i'd mess with danny a little bit. hope your enjoyin. nearly at the end now :) x**


	50. Tape

**Shania Twain - Forever And For Always**

_In your eyes  
I can see the look of the one who really loves me  
The one who wouldn't put anything in the world above me  
I can see your love for me in your eyes._

_And their ain't no way  
I'm letting you go now  
There ain't no way  
And their ain't no how  
__Never see that day_

(X)

**6 Months Later**

Danny and Missy were cleaning out a cupboard in a little used room. They had found that they couldn't decided between his room or hers so they chose one of their own together. There was all sorts in the cupboard. Boxes of bedding from Bristol.

Danny looked at Lexi's old Twilight bedding. "I swear I nearly threw this out when she said she loved lying under Robert Pattinson every night." he shook his head with a smile.

Missy pulled out a old bad of Christmas decorations. It had a clear bag inside it. She looked at it and twisted her face.

"What the hell is that? Has something died in there?" she asked Danny her nose scrunched in distaste peering at it closely.

"Oh My God! That's a sandwich made on the day Mrs Elliott brought our stuff over."

Missy mouth opened and she flung it to the floor.

"Eew Danny that's disgusting!"

"I was saving it for later." he declared laughing.

"How much later? 10 years have passed!" she kicked it towards him. "Here you are enjoy!"

He laughed picked it up and put it in the rubbish bag. Pulled another box out. Tore open the tape and opened it.

"O." he said sadly.

"What?" she asked looking inside. All she saw were clothes.

"This is all the clothes Lexi wore when she was ill. Me and Alice put them away. Didn't want her wearing them. Remembering you know. I wanted to get rid but Alice the pragmatic one asked what if her cancer came back and she had to wear the stuff she liked wearing until we got her other stuff." he shrugged and closed the box. "These we get rid of. They won't fit her now anyway and there's no way Amie is wearing them!"

"Yeah." Missy agreed. "I never thought I'd see the day when someone is taller than you!" Missy told him. Lexi was a few inches taller than him.

"I'll get the next box." she yanked. "It's stuck!" she strained. Pulled. "C'mon you stupid looking…" she heaved and the box gave. Something fell on her. Missy was face to face with a menacing black robed figure she squealed fighting to get it off her head. Her arms everywhere. Turned in a circle trying to get it off. She finally got it off her head. Threw something from her pocket at him and then ran and hid behind Danny.

Danny howled with laughter. Tears streamed from his eyes. She narrowed her eyes at him.

"Loved the dance Miss!" he breathed still laughing then imitated her. Arms in the air and hips twisting. "How much do I wish I had a camera right now! You've been framed pay for stuff like that!"

"What the hell is that?" she asked.

"Meet Edgar." he picked it up.

She touched it's face." It looks dead!" she remarked.

"It was our Halloween decorations a few years back. What did you throw at him?"

She looked shifty. "I'm not telling you." she laughed.

"Why?"

"Coz you'll take the mick!" grabbed Edgar from his hands. "I'll have my revenge later!" she told Edgar.

"No go tell me!" Danny said playfully.

She went in her pocket and pulled out what she threw at him.

Danny looked at her hand. "A homicidal half dead zombie and you throw cherry drops at him?"

"Hey I like cherry drops. Don't knock em! He might have been hungry. Or just like cherry drops!" she said seriously defending herself.

"And if he didn't? what was the rest of ya brilliant plan?" he asked laughing.

She was thoughtful. "Running like hell!"

"Sounds better than plan A. Tell you what if we ever get attacked by zombies just skip plan A altogether huh?" he smiled at her.

"I knew you'd tale the mick!" she muttered.

He laughed.

"So what we doing with your better looking brother?"

"That's fighting talk girly." he warned.

She looked at Edgar. "I suppose he's cute. In a dead homicidal kind of way."

"I'll never understand you Miss. We'll keep him. For now!" Danny told her laughing.

She folded the black robe around the face and placed it in a pile of other stuff to keep.

Danny had his back to her sorting something. Missy felt a sudden urge to be close to him. She walked up behind him and put her arms around his waist. Her head rested on his shoulder. "I love you, you know." she whispered. She was saying it first now which she hadn't done before.

"I know." he rested his hands op top of hers. "I love you too. I didn't plan it, or expect it but it's really good."

"Me either."

"I'm glad it's you though Miss. At first it was hard you know the guilt because of who we are and our connection by Alice but I figured she'd be happy that we were happy and we knew each other well."

"What?" she asked missing a little of what he said.

"It's good coz we already knew each other and got along great."

"I know. Brilliant isn't it?" she asked.

He spun so he faced her. "It's the best ever." kissed her softly. Deepened it. They were wrapped up in each other. The kiss more heated as seconds ticked by.

"Danny." she whispered. "We need to stop. Finish the room." she said breathlessly.

"This is more fun than looking through dusty boxes…" he paused. "Well except when you got a fright and showed me your dancing skills."

She smiled gave him one last kiss. "C'mon Mr Trevanion."

"Spoil sport!" he grumbled good naturedly.

They continued and found a box full of the kids art projects from school.

"I'm glad Ethan didn't wanna become a potter or he'd be broke!" Danny mentioned looking at what was supposed to be a vase but looked pitiful and was the size of a very very small mug!

"I think it's cute!" Missy said picking it up. Smiled at it.

"Alice did too. She insisted on having his and Lexi's stuff on display. One night I found Ethan and Lexi sneaking down and 'losing' their work."

"It got lost in the bin huh?" Missy asked.

"It just fell out of theirs hands in there!" Danny said laughing.

Missy exhaled. They looked at each other sadly.

"We had so many amazing times with Alice. I miss that a lot. Knowing the five of us will never be like that again. Me, you, Alice, Shauna and James." Danny said softly.

"I know there's someone missing and it feels weird when we're together. The four of us now. All these times just waiting to happen and they won't and never will." Missy replied.

They sat silently for a few moments remembering their friend.

(X)

The cupboard was now empty. Missy walked into it

"Hey this is a fair size when it's empty."

Danny jumped up and closed the door. Waited for her scream.

"Daniel what are you doing?" she asked through the door.

"Carrying on. C'mon your supposed to scream."

"Uh Uh! Nope I'm fine!"

"O your no fun. I can't believe I just said that about you." he chuckled. Opened the door and laughed at her face. She looked bored. Arms crossed.

"How old are you Daniel?" she asked simply.

He shrugged smiling.

"Yeah, old enough to know better. Or lock yourself in with me!" eyes twinkling.

"Now that is a plan!" he murmured.

She grabbed his hand and pulled him in with her. Walked backwards stood on something with a sharp edge.

"OW!" she said.

"Is that a mouse trap?" he asked.

"Mouse?" she said and nearly jumped into his arms. "No way!"

"Your not scared of an itty bitty mouse are you?" he asked. She was clutching his arms tightly.

"Scared who me NO! I'm freaking terrified of mice. They're small and hairy and their tails…eew… I just hate em!"

"I can't believe it." he said smiling at her.

"O believe it. On Aprils fools day one year Alice snuck in my bedroom when I was asleep an put a rubber mouse about 5 inches big on my pillow beside my head. So I'd be looking at it when I woke. Then she sat in wait in the corner. I woke up nose to nose with a rubber mouse. I've never screamed so much in my entire life. I've never seen her laugh so much in my entire life. She even had a picture of me basically eyes wide lying down mouth open squealing arms and legs tangled in the blanket trying to get away." she laughed a little. "Only took me 30 years to laugh about it. She chuckled. "I guess I finally see the funny side Alice." she looked at Danny. "She told me I would eventually. I said maybe in about 50 years. It took me weeks before I forgave my mum you know."

Danny looked.

"She let Alice in!"

"You had some good times together huh?" he asked.

"You have no idea Danny. When I was little I didn't wanna move from Dundee I had friends there. Or I thought they were friends. I didn't find friends til I met Shauna and Alice. God I miss her! It's so rare to find friends like that. Who love and support you no matter what."

He nodded.

"We scrapped you know. Had this massive fall out. It was the worst time of my life not being friends with them. You know I'd go back to feeling like that if she could come home coz at least she'd be here with her kids." Missy was getting upset.

"We all miss her Miss. We always will. As friends. As a husband. Kids. Sister."

Missy nodded in agreement. Swallowed her emotion.

"If there is a trap and there's a dead mouse your on your own!" she warned.

"Ok." he laughed.

Missy knelt down and felt about.

"Squeak!" he said smiling.

"Fuck off!" she hissed. "Your not funny!"

"I am funny admit it!" he retorted.

"Funny looking!" she retorted still looking in the dark cupboard. "I need a torch." she muttered

"Hey you love me!" he declared offended.

"Yeah I suppose someone had to. You can't hold it against me though!"

"O look who trying to be funny now!" he told her laughing.

"I'm hilarious!" she said smiling. "Got it, it's not a mouse trap thank god!" she stood up and walked out into the light.

"It's a videotape." he said wiping the dust off it after she handed it to him.

"Let me guess it's one of those tapes that you don't own Danny. You gonna put it with the rest of your other tapes you don't own." She said smiling.

He shrugged. "it doesn't have any sticker on it."

"Is that code for whips and chains?" she giggled.

"Let's watch it!" he said.

"What? No thanks. We have no idea what's on there. What if it's one of Dupes?"

Danny stood in thought a moment. He smiled. "You could have a point there Miss!" he paused. "But we'll never know unless we check."

"I say we save ourselves countless hours of therapy and God knows what else and put it back. He said he was a ladies man back in the day. What if this is him performing a strip tease or something. We'd end up institutionalised. Think of your kids Danny." she said dramatically.

"Na let's watch it. It'll be good for a laugh."

"I'm sorry kids I tried to warn him!" she muttered smiling.

Danny popped the tape in the video player in the room and pressed play.

Missy closed her eyes and covered her ears.

"Look Miss…" he tapped her arm as a screen appeared.

"No." she said.

"It's ok honest!"

She went to open her eyes.

"Wait there's Dupe naked!" he yelped.

"Argh!" she screamed and closed her eyes tight.

"Got ya!" he laughed.

"I don't believe you. He really is naked isn't he?" she said pained. Guide me from the room. If I try to walk out with my eyes closed I'll walk into a wall or fall over the bed."

"It's us. Honest. Me and you, Shauna and Mrs Elliott in Bristol. At my old house."

She peeked. One eye. She and Danny were stood on stepladders in the living room. Holding a banner up. Arguing. She sat beside Danny and watched.

(X) **(The tape)**

_Move your side up Miss." Danny told her._

"_I can't. Your taller than me Daniel!" she told him._

"_It'll look stupid if we put it low. Or wonky!" he declared._

"_It'll look fine!" she retorted._

"_Shot arse!" he muttered._

"_Freakishly tall giant." she told him back._

_They pushed and pulled and stretched but Danny wasn't happy._

"_Hey why don't I stand on Shauna's shoulders and put it up that way?" Missy suggested._

"_Why don't I stand on yours? You weigh a freaking ton!" Shauna said messing on with the streamers._

_"Shauna c'mon it's for Alice! And your shorter than me"_

"_Fine but don't blame me if I drop you!" Shauna said frustratedly. She just knew this was gonna end badly!_

_Shauna sat on the sofa and Missy climbed on her shoulder. Shauna struggled to stand up. "For Gods sake Miss who ate all the pies huh?"_

_Danny sniggered._

"_Not one word you!" Missy said to Danny._

_The banner was finally up. "Dammit Alice is outside!" Shauna declared and backed off away from the window quickly. Missy who had been reaching up moving the banner lost her balance. They were wobbling all over._

"_KEEP STILL MISS I'M GONNA FALL!" Shauna declared._

"_I can't!" Missy said. "Stop wobbling!"_

"_Going." Danny said amused._

_Shauna wobbled more._

"_Going." Danny repeated more amused then before._

_Shauna fell as did Missy. Shauna face down on the sofa and Missy did a flip over it._

"_Gone!" he said laughing._

_Missy landed with a thud. Popped her head up in disgust._

_"Ow couldn't you have dont the flip over the sofa Shauna? Why is it I am always the one who gets hurt when our plans fail. Always ME!" she said playfully. "And don't you start Daniel!" she said smiling. _

_The banter continued for a little while between Danny and Missy back and forth. The insults becoming worse. Their smiles becoming wider._

(X)

Oh God!" Missy said shaking her head. Put her hand over her eyes.

"What?" he said smiling. "This was Alice's 30th birthday party remember. The surprise one. You fell like a pro by the way!"

She remembered the party. Not this display of flirting though.

"God look at us Danny!"

"What we're carrying on!" he said.

"We're blatantly flirting. God you were married. Alice should have murdered me. She's have got away with it too!"

The guilt Missy used to feel returned full force.

"God were we like this in front of her too?"

"I don't see that as flirting. We were having a laugh!"

Missy felt sick.

He saw her sat there on the bed looking pained.

Why didn't Alice tell me Danny? I didn't know. I'd never have done that to her if I did! God I'm supposed to be her best friend. She was a good friends probably why she didn't pull me about it!"

"Miss…"

"Poor Alice. Having to put up with me being like that with you!" Missy was beating her self up.

"Hey it takes two to flirt Miss."

"But look at us Danny!" she said disgusted at herself.

"Alice didn't see it as a problem Miss. You know Alice, if she thought anything was going on or was gonna happen she'd have said something. She knew we didn't know. And she knew we both loved her and that nothing would ever happen between us!"

Missy guilt increased at Lexi's vice off camera saying she was at the door.

_Missy was ushering Danny out of the door. Telling him to get her away. _

_"How?" Danny asked._

"_I'm sure you'll find a way! Kiss her or something. I dunno anything!" Missy said dryly. "And remember she doesn't know we're here comprende?"_

"_Ya vole!" he said saluting._

_Missy made a face and a rude hand gesture as he walked away. She heard Shauna laughing in the background_

_He returned later hair all over looking happy. "Mission accomplished." and wiggled his eyebrows._

The video cut out then.

_The room was dark and filled with people shushing. Alice walked in. "Surprise!" Everyone yelled as Alice entered with Danny. Danny looked down at her lovingly, Shauna and Missy were at her other side immediately. Missy jumping up and down with excitement. Alice was beaming._

"God look how young the kids look!" Danny murmured.

Ethan newly adopted looked moody. Arms crossed. Lexi sat beside him talking animatedly pointing out people. Ethan rolled his eyes.

"That was a good day." he said softly. Watching as Alice opened her presents. Carrying on when she opened a envelope off Melissa. Alice showed everyone the paper. It said IOU a present. Then Missy laughed at Alice's face and handed her a small black box which had a necklace inside.

"_Really IOU Miss." Alice said dryly after hugging her. _

"_Hey I was gonna give you a tea bag and tell ya to have a drink on me!" Missy said on the tape. _

"Your present was classic. Your first one anyway" he laughed softly.

She sniffed and he saw tears rolling down her cheeks. "Oh Miss you ok?"

"I dunno." she admitted. "This isn't even sad and I'm bawling!"

"It is sad. She was my wife. Our best friend too."

Missy cried more. "God I never cry!" she said voice shaking. Her tears subsided.

She looked at the TV. "Why'd you stop the tape?" she asked him.

"Coz it was upsetting you." he told her.

Her shoulders slumped. "That is so sweet." she said as a few tears emerged once again.

"Sorry." he said panicking. He didn't know how to handle her tears. "If I turn it back on will you stop crying?"

She just sat there so he folded his arms around her. Her tears soon dried. "You ok now honey?"

She nodded. Wiped her eyes. "I have no idea where that came from." she admitted.

"I might. I have a little experience with that."

She frowned. "With emotional woman? Alice didn't cry all that much!" she told him. "Unless she was…." her heart stopped.

"Pregnant woman cry Miss. You've been tired. Crabby. Fussy with your meals and now you cried over a videotape."

Missy felt terror run through her. "But we can't. Its too soon."

"It was bound to happen sooner or later Miss." he told her. "We haven't been careful."

"Make it later! Much later!" she yelped.

He put his hand tenderly on her cheek. "Calm down Miss. It's a baby, not a nuclear weapon!"

"It's ok for you. You've done this before. What if it has a funny sense of humour like me. Do you really wanna live with two of me?"

"Scary thought." he joked.

That's all it was - joking. He'd wouldn't mind if it was just like her.

"Danny, what we gonna do?" she asked.

"Well firstly. Your gonna take a test. Then if we are expecting a baby then there's hospital appointments and scans and then 9 months later we have our baby here."

"Then the fun begins." she muttered. "This is all your fault!" she declared.

"Me?" he asked.

"I was innocent till I met you!"

"Yeah right!" he scoffed playfully.

"I was! You corrupted me Mr Trevanion. See all your fault!"

He rolled his eyes. Conceded defeat. He knew better than to argue with a pregnant woman.

"You'll be fine Miss. We'll both be fine."

She smiled. So did he.

"You wanna tell the kids? Coz I'm pretty sure you are." he said confidently.

"Not yet. We'll tell em later. When we know for sure."

He kissed her softly.

And they all lived happily ever after.

**AN ok the story sounds like it is finished BUT there is one chapter after this one. oooo the mind boggled wot could it b? tell me your ideas if you want x**

**also sorry about the length of this chapter, i wanted to say alot with this. i wanted danny and missy to have fun but also to show people that although alice is gone that she is was and still is a big part of danny's and missy's lives and they will always miss her and lover her even tho they are together now. x 4000 words OMG :O**


	51. Published?

Right! All done!

The finishing touches had been added. A manuscript was turned over.

"Another Life, Another Time. By Alice Trevanion." Alice murmured. With a satisfied smile.

Alice couldn't believe it. She had actually wrote a story! How chuffed was she? And she had an idea for her next one. She'd speak to Miss about that first though!

It had all started when the storm happened. In her story it killed her. Actually what had happened was she fell down a ravine and broke her leg. Ended up with hypothermia and had this insane dream that Danny and Missy fell in love. She of course awoke but the dream refused to leave her. So as she lay in bed she began to write and that's how it was. A lot of the story was based on true events. Like Ethan's fund raising. Tapas was purely fictional. As was the township fire and their house burning down. The fayre had actually happened though. Missy had came and bought Danny had a laugh too she was told.

She did find it slightly weird it was Missy and Danny that got together but they had bounced off each there so well in her dream and she so wasn't writing a love story about herself. You write what you know and she knew Missy! Plus her personality had left it open for funny bits. She was so chuffed to have finally penned a novel.

The telephone rang and she walked over. Hobbling a little. The cast was just off and she still felt twinges.

"Hello." Alice said.

"Alice it's Missy. I got news." she said excitedly.

"What is it Miss?"

"I'm getting married. Me and Karl are making the craziness legal!"

Alice squealed like a teenager. "Really? This is gonna be so good. Me and Shauna…." Alice went silent.

"There's something else too Alice.""Yeah?" Alice asked.

"I'm pregnant! Due in July."

"Oh wow Miss. This is so amazing. Your gonna be the best mum!"

"How's your story going?" Missy asked.

"Just finished actually."

"I want my 10 percent cut remember. All the input I gave you!" Missy joked. "Plus you used me!"

"Don't worry if I make millions I won't forget you." Alice laughed. "You been in touch with Shauna yet?" Alice asked softly.

"Yeah I spoke to her last night. I did ring you last night too but Danny told me you had went for a soak." Missy told her.

"How has she been?"

"Same old same old. She'd good the kids are good James is good."

"That's good." Alice said softly

"O for Gods sake will you just ring her and save me the trouble of being go between. I have the same conversation with the two of you all the time. And I pass on the same messages every time. God forbid one of you should actually die like you did in your story. It would kill you. Please for me. Please Alice. I've spoke to her but you know what she's like." Missy pleaded.

"Hey Miss calm down yeah. It's not good for the baby."

"I know but this upsets me. It's been early a year and we haven't been together!" she was breathing heavily. Emotion clear in her tone.

"Look Miss I'm gonna go and work on your wedding present ok. We'll talk soon. And take care of yourself and eat well and drink milk…"

"God!" Missy muttered.

"Congratulations Miss."

"Thanks Alice. Talk soon. Love you."

Missy disconnected.

Alice made a split second decision. Dialled a number. It rang.

"Look Shauna it's Alice. Can we talk?"

They both said their sorry's. Shauna for calling Daniel a psycho and Alice for throwing their friendship away. Soon they were talking animatedly. Laughing like nothing had happened. Discussing Missy's wedding and baby.

NOW everything was perfect at Leopards Den. Everyone got their happy ending.

-x-

**The End *sniff***

**A/N ok people can I just say GOT YA GOT YA GOT YA GOT YA times 500 million haha**

**I couldn't kill Alice but I did have this idea of Danny and Missy and this is how I did got around it. I had this planned from the very beginning hahahahahaha. I had changed my style of writing if anyone noticed but kept reverting back which was a pain but anyways Alice is not dead it was her writing a story :D GO ME haha**

**Alice mentioned a second story she had an idea 4. I do actually have this idea in my head. If anyone wants me to add that to my planned stories list I will Alice will be writing it so no she won't be dead but it will be about Miss/Danny and the baby too. Oooo intrigued yet?**

**Anyways drop me a line I'll add it and get to it when I can.**

**Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed my story x **

**And finally for those who haven't seen my profile this might be my last full story for a while coz i'm gonna get so busy wi uni it'll be unreal. but i shall be writing one shots every so often so i don't go mad. i'm saying this and next week i'll have gone crazy and started another story lol anyways i just thought i'd warn you, no i haven't been abducted by aliens just busy haha thanks agen 4 reading and reviewin x**


	52. Denial 1

**A/N ok that story had ended bt this idea seriously wouldn't leave me alone and it has been driving me crazy so I had to write it. Will just b a couple of chapters which is why I have added it on the end of this story. It won't be too long coz I really shouldn't be writing it bt it was doin my head right in! Missy is about to have the baby. Read up to find out what happens next. (PS this is Alice writing again)**

**Denial**

Missy was sat in the living room. Feeling extremely frustrated. God she was the 8th wonder of the world. 6 days over her due date. She was pissed! Her kid would chose to come late! God she needed to go in labour. Really she had to!

"Hey honey." Danny said walking into the living room. "Any signs that he'll come today?" Danny asked. Kissed her cheek softly.

"No, SHE isn't telling me."

A familiar discussion. Since Missy knew this was the one and only child she'd have then she wanted the gender to be a surprise.

"My son will come when he wants to." Danny said smiling. Patted her bump.

"Well mum said he's ready now!" she declared.

Danny sat beside her. "Oh you crabby honey?"

She made a face."

"How about I finish early and we can snuggle up together later."

"I'm sick of my life Danny! I just want the baby here. I can't wait to meet him or her. I'm just so excited you know!"

He nodded. "Soon Missy."

He kissed her deeply. "I'll see you in a bit yeah."

Lexi walked into the living room. She was heavily pregnant too.

"Still here Miss?" Lexi asked smiling.

"O yeah. She's just like you lot. Stubborn. Like her daddy!"

"At this rate I'll go into labour before you do!" Lexi said meaning every word.

"How long you got left Lex?"

"2 weeks then Ethan junior makes his appearance. Could be sooner the way my back has been playing up!"

"Stop bragging kid!" Missy said playfully.

"Sorry." Lexi said meekly.

"How's Ethan and Zoey?"

"Well Zoey is at nursery best place for her. Terrible two's god! She can threw a wobbler like no one I've ever seen!"

"I wonder where she gets that temper from!" Missy remarked.

"And Ethan who was supposed to be finished work had to hang on coz they had a bad fire over in Jo'burg. Didn't want me in the house alone in case I drop. His words not mine."

"God why do we let me do this to us? I hate men!" Missy muttered. "I swear your dad is not getting within 10 miles of me after this!"

"Too much info there Miss." Lexi laughed.

"How could he do this to me?" Missy asked Lexi playfully.

"It takes two." Lexi replied.

Missy nodded. Stifled a yawn.

"So you getting married then?"

Missy made a face. "This kid is gonna be born a Trevanion. Can't that be enough? We've only been together 15 months. Took you and Ethan over 10 years to get married!"

"Your having a kid together." Lexi pointed out.

"Yeah and that hints at commitment don't you think?" Missy told her pointedly.

"I think my dad's worried if you decide that this life isn't for you then you'll take the baby with you and go back to Scotland." Lexi told her softly. "I'm not sure that's just what I think."

"Oh Lex I wouldn't do that to him. I love your dad. I really do but getting married? I dunno Lex. I'd feel like I was bound in chains." Missy told her. "I don't need a ring to know he loves me and he shouldn't need one either."

"Its not like that at all Miss. Being bound in chains is a bit dramatic don't you think?"

"Says the newly happily married Mrs Ethan Bell. Alexis Bell has a nice ring to it." Missy mentioned.

Lexi smiled. "I love my new signature."

"So what name have you and Ethan decided on. Or need I ask?"

"Ethan Daniel Alex Bell. The Alex isn't after me it's after mum."

Missy smiled. "You mum and dad will be well chuffed!"

"You and dad got any names picked?"

Missy shrugged. "We can't even agree on what gender we think it's gonna be!" Missy laughed. "I think we have Ryan Lawrence Trevanion for a boy. And for a little girl which I definitely think we are having we have Jaime Alicia Trevanion."

"Mum'd like that."

"I know. I wish she was here. Your mum. I'm sure she'd have tips to bring on labour." she murmured and then yawned.

"I feel your pain there Miss!" Lexi agreed.

"I'm going for a nap." Missy told her tiredly.

Lexi nodded and rubbed her back as she felt another twinge.

Missy walked into her room and looked at the cream moses basket set up. She ran her fingers down the satin covers as she passed. She yearned to hold her baby in her arms!

"C'mon baby!" she pleaded rubbing her stomach. "You sure are your mothers kid I'll tell you that!" she murmured.

(X)

"Miss. Miss." Danny whispered.

"I'll sort the stuff later." she muttered her hand swatting at the voice trying to wake her. "Bed needs me."

Danny would have laughed at her statement but they had been together long enough that he was used to her funny comments when she woke up. He smiled anyway. He knew exactly how to wake her up and he was happy to do it! He pressed his lips to hers. Her arms found their way around his neck and she kissed him back. Felt desire streak though her body. She moaned deep in her throat. He pulled away.

She squeaked in protest. I was enjoying that!" she complained.

"C'mon eat something honey." he said.

"Can't I sleep? I'm tired."

"Yeah after you've ate and have some..."

"If you say milk then all bets are off. I won't be held accountable for where the dreaded white stuff ends up!" she warned.

He grinned.

She rolled from the bed. Shuffled into the kitchen. She was sat in front a sandwich and a cold glass of milk. "Danny!" she said exasperated. "More milk? C'mon I'm ready to take a machine gun to all the cows in the world. Look what you done to me. I'm having dreams about murdering cows!"

He chuckled.

"I'm not drinking it!" she said softly.

"He needs it." Danny negotiated.

She made a face then sipped. "I'm never drinking milk again as long as I live!"

"You still not had the baby yet Miss? He is being stubborn!" Daniel said walking into the kitchen. He was 9 now. He would have been as tall as Alice was if she had been alive.

"He's not a he. It's a girl!" Missy said.

"Na me and dad have been outnumbered enough! Your having a boy!"

"You weren't outnumbered." Missy said smiling.

"Dad said one angry girl is the equivalent of 2 boys."

"Did he really?"

Danny shifted from one foot to the other. Daniel looked at him apologetically.

"Anyway no it isn't here yet. It is being stubborn like you."

Daniel smiled. "Lexi had her baby."

Missy's jaw dropped. "No way! I only spoke to her a few hours ago. Make that…" she checked her watch. "Christ 8 hours ago."

"Yes I'm a granddad again. Ethan junior. 9lbs 3 ozs."

"Wow." Missy murmured.

"Double of his daddy too apparently. Lex sent me a picture. Said she understood why we couldn't visit. With you being ready to pop. She should be home soon anyway they let you come home straight away after your second child."

He showed her the picture on his phone. Missy was looking at a baby size Ethan. With soft brown eyes and downy brown hair.

"God did Ethan make him by himself? He's his fathers clone. Even down to the dimple in his right cheek."

Lexi breezed into the kitchen. Followed by Ethan who was carrying baby Ethan in his carrier and had Zoey in his other arm. She grinned at Missy.

"Bag!" she said playfully.

"So your still here Miss?" Lex asked and cooed over Ethan.

"I hate you by the way. I was 2 weeks in front of you!" she sad playfully.

Danny and Missy went over and gushed over the baby. "Awww he's well lush!" Missy said. Sat back down.

"Yeah. Well done kids." Danny agreed.

"Thanks." Both Ethan and Lexi answered.

"Ethan!" Zoey said clearly. "Baby brother."

Zoey who was now nearly two and a half was a lot taller and showed her mothers features in her face.

"That's right sweetheart." Danny said and smiled at her.

"All he do sweep. Me pway!" Zoey said and toddled over to his carrier. "Wake up!" Frowned at the baby when he slept on. "Daddy!" she said frustrated.

"He's a baby angel. He's too little to play. He's really tired too." Ethan told her softly.

Zoey frowned not understanding. "Me wanna pway!" she stamped her foot.

In the midst of the terrible two's Ethan saw Zoey gearing up for a tantrum. He knew it was time to intervene or it'd go on for hours. Literally. "Hey Zo come and get EJ some stuff from the car yeah. You can show him his new rattles when he wakes up." Zoey nodded happily suitably distracted.

"Magic touch!" Ethan whispered to Lex as he passed. Walked out to the car with Zoey.

Conversation swirled for a short time. Ethan and Zoey were playing in the living room. No one noticed Missy her head rested on her hand.

"You ok Miss?" Lexi asked.

She was sleeping on her hand. She was jerked awake.

"Um, yeah Lex. In the cupboard above the sink."

Lexi frowned.

"Fatigue." Danny whispered. Missy pushed away what was left of her half eaten sandwich.

"I'm going back to bed. I'm tired." she murmured. Kissed Danny. Had a last look at the baby.

"Do you feel ok Miss?" Danny asked worried about how much she was sleeping.

"Yeah I'm good. Just really tired you know?"

He nodded squeezed her hand. She walked away into their room.

"I'll better be getting the kids home too. Want to get Ethan straight into a routine."

"You just rest Lex. Having a baby takes it out of you."

Lexi smiled. "I know. I'm on orders off Ethan. He has all the jobs covered. If I so much as try to lift a finger he's gonna use a straight jacket he pinched off his psychologist friend. He has 4 weeks paternity leave and he's took another 3 weeks holidays."

Danny smiled. "He's a good dad. I'm glad you've got him. It's obvious he loves you."

Lexi nodded in agreement. "He does. He loves me and his kids."

Lexi kissed her dad. "See you dad. Hey Zo come give granddad a kiss." Lexi said. Zoey ran from the living room and jumped into his arms. Danny who was standing caught her and swung her around like he used to do to Lexi. Gave her a kiss. "Be good for mum and dad and I'll see you soon."

"Kay Gandad."

**A/N awww poor miss, excited to meet her bby bt it is bein stubborn. ok who wants a boy or a girl. reader input time :) x**


	53. D2 Wrong

It was 10 o'clock and the kids were in bed. Danny walked to his bedroom he shared with Missy. She hadn't left since a few hours earlier when she declared she was tired. He walked in and saw her spark out on the bed. He changed into loose sweat pants and climbed into bed beside her. Missy didn't flicker. Her breathing remained slow and deep. Missy didn't even move when he slid his arm around her and his hand came to rest on the place where his baby grew. He rubbed it absently.

"Take care of them Alice. For me please." he murmured softly.

'Never any doubt Danny. I love them too remember.' her reply reverberated in his head.

He fell into a deep content sleep. Knowing Alice took care of someone he had grow to love more than life.

An hour later he awoke to groaning.

"Miss you ok?" he asked awake immediately.

She panted. "Danny?" she asked tiredly.

"Look Miss we'll be fine. I'm gonna take you to hospital ok?"

She clenched her teeth as wave after wave of shudders wracked through her body. They just ambushed her when she least expected it. She nodded.

Danny rang Ethan and asked him to come and pick the kids up. He placed Missy in the car with a bag. Her head was on the dashboard and he heard her panting audibly.

Ethan arrived.

"So D day has arrived then?" Ethan asked.

"Yeah. She seems to be in a lot of pain. She just woke up like this, we have no idea how far gone she is!" Danny said.

"Well you better get going then!"

"Thanks for coming son. I know you have your newborn son at home."

"No problem Danny. Don't forget to call us as soon as it's here."

Danny smiled. "I sure will!"

They were soon in the hospital in the delivery room. An hour had passed and the pain had intensified ten fold.

"I've changed my mind Danny!" Missy panted. Smiling.

He smiled. "I don't think it works like that honey. Sorry. Too late he's ready."

"How many times. Stop calling her that!" she told him playfully.

He held her hand tightly.

"You can push now Melissa." the nurse said. "Whenever you feel the urge."

Melissa nodded. Concentrated. Gripped Danny's hand and pushed. Panted when she finished.

"You never coming near me again!" she told Danny.

He laughed and murmured encouragement.

After a few pushes Missy grew more determined. Right I'll try and have him here on my next push she thought. She focused her mind.

"Ok Melissa push!" the nurse said. Danny was stood at her feet.

Melissa focused all her energy and pushed with all her might. The baby crowned and slid into Danny's waiting hands. She collapsed on the bed in exhaustion.

Danny stood holding his son in his hands. His angry wails reverberating around the room. "Ssh little man," he said getting teary. "Your fine. Your good." the babies arms and legs were flying angrily. His face red and scowling.

The doctors took the baby and he wiped his hands and joined Melissa. Kissed her soundly.

"How is she?" Missy asked.

"She is a he and he is great. Amazing." he said laughing a little. He felt euphoric.

Missy beamed. "Oh wow we got a little boy?" she asked excitedly. "Where is he?"

"The doctors are doing their thing. We'll see him soon." he kissed her again.

The baby was cleaned and measured and weighed. "8 pounds 12 ounces. " the nurse said.

"A good healthy weight! Danny said proudly. "All my kids were born big."

The baby was brought to Missy. She held him. "Hello little man." he snuffled. But slept on.

"He's got the look of his dad don't you thin?" the nurse remarked happily.

"He sure does!" Danny said grinning. "Even the little crease on his forehead when he frowns." Danny mentioned. "He's perfect isn't he Miss?"

Missy ran her finger down the babies cheek not saying a word. She just looked at the baby quietly.

"You wanna hold him Danny?" she asked.

"You can keep him for a bit if you want." Missy could tell he wanted to hold him so she handed him over. "I'm ok I'll hold him later. Daddy needs a turn too."

He nodded and took him. Muttered nonsense to him. Missy sat there. Thinking. Frowning. She felt weird. Different. That was expected she supposed. The baby though. Something didn't feel quite right there! Why hadn't she seen him when he was born, there had been a 5 minute gap! Your being daft Miss! She told herself. Just bask in the glory of being a new mum yeah! She just couldn't shake this feeling that something was wrong!

"When can I…we come home?" Missy asked.

"Well you had a normal delivery so as soon as tomorrow morning."

"Ok." Missy said.

"Right dad, we're moving them to the ward so you'll have to go home now." The nurse said smiling.

Danny was over the moon about the baby but sad he had to leave them. "I'll be back first thing tomorrow morning." he placed their son in her arms.

"So what you calling him?" the nurse asked writing down an identification tag.

Missy opened her mouth to say Billy. When Danny interrupted and said Ryan Trevanion.

The nurse smiled and smoothed the tag on the babies ankle. Danny kissed his head softly. Then Missy. "I'll see you both tomorrow." he caressed Missy cheek then left them.

Missy stared down at the baby again. "Yeah sure." she said dismissively.

(X)

Missy looked Ryan. Ryan was supposed to be her babies name. He opened his eyes. Pale green eyes stared at her. Who is this child? This wasn't her baby! This was a mix up. She didn't know why she just had this feeling that was growing! He started to snuffle.

"I suppose your hungry baby?" she asked. Reluctant to use his name. The nurses had left her milk.

He latched onto the mini bottle and suckled hungrily. She looked around as he ate, looked anywhere except at him.

There was no doubt this child looked like Danny! So he had to be hers right? She sat the baby up and rubbed his back absently. Changed his nappy and lay him in his crib. Sat on her bed and stared at him sleeping. She was too wired to sleep.

(X)

Missy was looking at a magazine the following morning. Danny and Lexi walked in. Missy smiled and looked up.

"Hello you two." she turned the next page.

Ryan started too snuffle as soon as Danny walked in. "Danny get him for me yeah?" Missy asked looking at her magazine.

Lexi looked at her confused.

"How's he been?" Danny asked picking his son up and smiling at him widely.

Missy shrugged. "Ok I suppose. He had a few bottles. 3...I think. Drank an ounce each time. No it was 4 bottles actually." she sounded completely disinterested.

Danny didn't notice just cooed over Ryan.

Missy flicked through her magazine. "This is so rubbish!" she muttered. She hadn't even looked at the baby.

"Miss you ok?" Lexi asked. "You know feeling ok?""

"Yeah sure am Lex."

"Melissa. You and your baby are free to go home. As long as you have a car seat."

"Car seat?" she asked puzzled. "O for the baby. Yeah I think so. Do we?" Missy asked Danny.

"We do doctor." Danny said happily.

"You wanna carry him out Miss?" Danny asked after sliding Ryan's jacket on.

"Hey Lex you haven't held him yet have you?" Missy suggested.

Missy packed her stuff and walked on ahead.

"Dad is Miss ok?" Lexi asked worried.

"Yeah honey. She's just tired you know. Like all new mums. Like you probably.

"She hasn't touched him since I've been here!" Lexi protested.

"She's resting Lex. You know when he does." Danny said.

"Am not too sure dad!" Lexi said worriedly.

"Miss is a great mum you know that. Look at her with Amie and Daniel and Zoey too. She just needs to get her bearings."

Lexi was gonna be keeping an eye on her anyway!

(X)

Missy walked out of the hospital. Ryan wasn't hers! She knew it. It all made perfect sense in her head as she sat not sleeping last night. She looked around. The nurses waved. She frowned. Why were they letting her leave with a random, baby. Are they in the business of giving people the wrong babies? She saw nothing of herself in this child so he couldn't be her son! Someone would come though! They wouldn't let them walk out of the hospital with him. They couldn't. They'd get done for kidnapping. And Danny! Why was he going along with this? She devised a plan though. If she ignored…it then they'd swap it back for her baby and then she could be happy. But no, it…he was still here. They were taking their time! She was so angry. She wanted to see her baby! She was so gonna kick off if she didn't see him soon!"

**A/N UH OH wot is up wi Miss? and most importantly is the only the beginning? keep reading x**


	54. D3 Hard Time

**One Week Later**

Missy sat brooding. It was getting worse! Missy thought angrily. Ryan was still here! She had tried ignoring him but Danny kept handing him to her. She had to feed him, bath him. Everything. God was she the only one who knew something wasn't right? Was she the only one who knew that Ryan wasn't her kid. God a mother knew these things and that baby wasn't hers. He didn't feel right. He felt awkward and she sure hadn't felt maternal towards him! She waited for the rush of motherly love all mothers say they feel and you know what she felt when she looked at him? Zippo. So there! That's how she knew! She didn't want to be forced into looking after him but Danny just wouldn't stop! He ignored her subtle hints. She knew why though. She had a feeling he was in on this whole charade. He knew something and was keeping it from her! He stuffed papers in drawers and whispered when she entered rooms. No she wasn't being paranoid it was true. She had to find out what was going on. Dammit he was supposed to love her, he shouldn't be treating her like this!

She started hearing murmurs in her head. They were incoherent. Whispers on the edge of her subconscious. God she felt hyper bouncy. Sprung tight ready to bounce off the walls. Which was weird coz she wasn't sleeping. Barely eating. Danny seemed too engrossed in the baby to notice which she was eternally grateful about. She so didn't want him ragging on her about it! Ryan began to cry. Again! Good this child irritated her. She exhaled. Went to him. Picked him up and held him awkwardly in her arms. God it didn't feel like this when she held Ethan jnr. It felt all warm and nice. This felt …..the only word she could find was awkward! She had a belligerent expression on her face and tapped her foot in impatience as she rocked.

"C'mon!" she muttered.

He settled and she placed him back quickly in his crib. Thank God for that!

Her phone rang and she was grateful for the interruption. Maybe it's Shauna! She looked at her screen.

"Urg Melanie!" Melanie was her manager at Melissa's Designs. She picked up.

"Look Miss it's Mr Bergstein he refuses to co operate he is threatening to find another design company. He will only look at your designs. He states that your name is false advertising if your not the one doing the designing."

Melissa counted to 3. "Tell him I can't come over. I'm in south Africa for Gods sake. And tell him the name is a name not advertising so he can shove it up his ass!"

"Really Miss?" she asked in disbelief.

"Of course not!" Missy hissed GOD! "Look if you can fax me over the blueprints of his house I'll do some designs then fax them back. Is that acceptable to him?"

"Well Miss I don't know. He was blustering at me!"

"Well ask him!" Missy snapped. Breathing heavily.

Ryan began to cry. Missy's temper which was already on a hair trigger snapped. And she flung her phone across the room. Thankfully in the opposite direction of Ryan's crib. God she was really fuming now! Arms shaking. Breathing heavily. Stupid work! Stupid baby. Stupid everything. She walked in the direction of the crib. Danny walked in the room. Before he could say a word Missy snapped at him

"Deal with him!" she then stomped from the room into her bedroom.

Missy paced in the room. Saw a picture of her Alice and Shauna on her dresser. They were smiling happily. This was taken not long before Alice and Shauna fell out. Her anger dissipated and she was in floods of tears. She lay on the bed and cried her heart out.

"Miss?" Danny said. He held Ryan.

"What?" she replied. Her tone rough with emotion and evidence of her tears.

"It gets better you know. Your still new at this."

She didn't care about the baby! "I'm fine!"

"You sure Miss? Your not your usual bubbly happy self. I can't find the woman I fell for in there."

Her temper exploded again and she was off the bed in a second. "Well excuse me for being tired. It's hard being happy when you can't sleep!"

Danny put a hand up. "Whoa!" She had never reacted to him in that way before.

"I'm getting out of here Danny!" she muttered and walked away.

"Missy we need to sort this honey." he said softly.

"Go away Daniel your irritating me!" she hissed as she walked away. Slammed the front door as she left. Danny stood there confused. What the hell was going on?

(X)

"Miss when you get this message give me a call yeah?" Danny left yet another message on her phone. She had been away all day. He was worried. Especially at her state of mind when she'd left! Her phone was going straight to voicemail.

Amie walked into the living room. "Dad where's Miss?" Danny looked at his youngest daughter. 8 years old and petit like her mother. She had long glossy black hair and clear blue eyes. She was still the double of her mother. She usually had his grin on her face but she looked worried at the moment.

"She's out short stuff." his new nickname for her.

"But she promised to help me with my art project. We were gonna make a house with all mod cons. You know all modern and stuff. And trendy too. She's a interior designer so she's good!"

"Sorry baby she isn't here at the moment. Why not ask Daniel to help you?" Danny suggested.

"But he's rubbish! Missy promised. She never breaks her promises!"

"Ames she probably forgot. She's been stressed out recently." and acting a hell of a lot differently too he added silently.

"I guess I'll do it by myself then!" she fumed. Stomped from the room.

Danny rubbed his head tiredly looked across the room and saw a piece of black plastic on the floor. He walked over and picked it up. Shook his head. So that was the thud he heard before! Missy had flung her phone. And that's why she wasn't answering. God this was weird. Usually if Missy left her phone anywhere she stressed until she got back to it. It was like an extension of her hand. Without it she had extreme withdrawal! For her to stay out this long without her mobile was cause for concern in itself. Right when she got home they were gonna have this out! She was breaking promises to the kids. Barely eating. Not sleeping she was having really bad mood swings. He walked on egg shells around her in case he set her off. Like he had this afternoon. A week had passed all this hormonal stuff should have calmed down by now! It seemed to be escalating if anything. All she seemed to do was yell or sit in silence contemplating something. She's distracted, agitated and most of all seemed reluctant to spend time with Ryan. To hold him. Feed him. Bond with him at all! She always looked so bored when she did it. Like she'd rather be doing anything else than that! They used to talk about how it would be when he was here. She used to get so excited about everything. Now it was like she couldn't care less!

More hours passed and his worries intensified. Where is she? He put Ryan down to sleep and helped Amie with her project.

"Tell Miss not to talk to me dad!" Amie said coldly.

Danny was about to defend Miss when he decided against it. There's no defence for letting the kids down. "You'll feel better in the morning sweetie."

"No dad I'll feel worse coz then she'll be saying sorry and I'll still be stuck with my rubbish project. No offence dad."

"None taken. I'm sure she's sorry." Old habits were hard to break he decided.

Amie snorted.

Danny smiled. "You remind me of your mum. Not only coz of how you look."

"Really?" Amie asked. "I don't remember much. It's getting fuzzy like a dream you sorta know but can't see clearly."

He nodded. "Well you already know you look like her but it's so much more than that. You walk like her head held high ready to take on the world if you need to. You act like her too like this cocky like me or leave me attitude you know. You've got her confidence. I'm so proud of you, you know."

"Thanks dad." she said softly.

"You sure you don't wanna talk to Miss anymore?"

Amie looked at him. That expression he had just explained on her face. God he was looking at Alice. Spooky.

"Missy don't need me no more dad. She's got a little baby all of her own. Well she can leave me alone! I hate her!" she hissed.

Danny kissed her soft black hair. "Don't worry baby huh. Just go to sleep."

"G'night dad. I love you. And I'm proud of you too. For sticking up for her even though she don't deserve it!"

(X)

3 hours after the kids were all settled in bed Missy arrived at home. Well stumbled. She was giggling as she walked into the house and fell through the front door.

"Ssh!" she chastised herself. Then giggled again. Rather then getting up to walk She crawled to her bedroom. Reached the door. Pulled herself up to standing. Back straight. Opened the door and walked in pretending to be sober. Pretending badly! She walked in and saw the room was empty except for the sleeping baby. "Huh?" she said.

"I was in the kitchen." Danny said coming up behind her carrying a baby monitor.

"Christ Danny what you trying to do scare me sober?" she giggled. "Scare me sober." she repeated with a smile and laugh.

"Have you been drinking?" he asked incredulous.

She ignored him. "Hi honey." she murmured.

"Miss!" he started.

"Aw Danny don't be like that honey." she whispered. Draped her arms around his neck. Pressed kisses to his lips.

"Missy you are drunk!" he said angrily.

"So." she smiled at him. "Your gorgeous when your angry you know."

"How many you had?" he asked

She took a step back and wobbled. "I dunno." she replied defiantly. Crossed her arms. That made her lose her balance and wobble more so she undid it.

"Miss you don't drink. In all the years I've known you I have never seen a drop of alcohol pass your lips." he had no idea why she didn't drink he just knew she didn't.

"Well I do now!" she wobbled again and shook her head. Wow head rush. I have missed a lot the last few years. I have loadsa catching up to do!" she murmured smiling.

He disregarded her drunken statement. "Aren't you gonna ask how Ryan is?"

She made a face. "No." she said dismissively.

That made him angry. "What about Amie?"

"What's the matter with Amie?" she asked worriedly.

"Her art project." he said simply.

Missy's jaw dropped as she remembered. "Oh no, I'll go help her now."

"No Miss you won't obviously you haven't noticed it's midnight." he hissed.

"Of course I did." she muttered crossing her arms petulantly.

"What were you thinking?" he asked angrily.

"Stop talking to me in that tone!" she warned.

"Don't turn this around and make this my fault!" he retorted.

"I can't talk to you when your like this." she said superorily.

"What am I supposed to be happy you broke a promise to my daughter coz you wanted a drink?" he said angrily but softly aware Ryan was asleep in his moses basket.

"I had a good time does that not count?" she asked.

He frowned it wasn't like her to be so selfish. Usually nothing short of hospitalisation would keep her from keeping a promise to his kids. Even then she'd crawl if she had to. She always had been close to them. Even when Alice had been alive. The favourite aunt to tell you the truth. The fun mad one they could always count on to be there.

"No it doesn't. Not when Amie is heartbroken coz she wanted to spend time with you."

"Why have you gotta make me feel guilty danny. So I had fun!"

She just wasn't getting it was she? "Miss what's up with you?"

"I'm fine danny. Brill. Loving life."

"Obviously." he breathed. "Miss your acting bizarre. I'm worried about you,"

She felt her anger rise. "I'm normal Danny. Don't dare say I'm not normal."

Danny frowned. She had got over that label ages ago. "Miss you might think your normal but your not, your different."

Her eyes went black and she her fists were clenched. Her face was one of pure anger. "I'm leaving here before I do something I regret!" she said.

She turned and went to walk from the room. Her shoulders were heaving with every breath she took evidence if her anger.

Missy's anger just built and built. She walked into the spare room and punched the wardrobe full force. Pain streaked through her hand. She didn't feel it though. She IS normal dammit! He's wrong. She'd ben normal since the day she was born. She was the same as everyone else. Nothing made her different. Not even when Andy… Memories assaulted her. One of the reasons why she didn't drink was it left her vunerable and susceptible to the onslaught of memeories she'd rather forget! That wasn't the excuse she gave her friends though. The memories flooded over her. She grabbed her head and fell on the bed. Closed her eyes tightly. She heard voices.

'Kill…kill….kill…." she clutched her head harder. So hard her fingernails felt like they were embedded in her skull. She tried to blank her mind. Focused her breathing. The voices became louder. "Kill…kill…kill…kill…" to the same tempo as her beating heart.

"Go away!" she pleaded. Tears leaked from her eyes. God what is wrong with me? She had always joked to friends and family that she was insane. Now she was beginning to wonder if it was true!

**A/N can I just say I like Amie and I tried to write her like Alice. Well a mini Alice. **

**And poor Miss. She is having a hard time. It gets even worse for her next chapter. Keep reading and hope your enjoying x **


	55. D4 Escalation

Missy didn't sleep that night. After she banged her head off the floor a dozen times the voices finally subsided. She sat in the kitchen nursing a cup of coffee. In shorts and a t-shirt. Her head pounded. The voices which nagged her were there, but quiet enough to ignore. For now. All the voice's said was one word. Repeated that one word everytime. KILL!

But who? Herself? That was an idea! she thought seriously. She didn't much like herself anyway. There were guns here. One bullet and that would be it. She mused. Or maybe pills? Or a knife? No it had to be quick. If she was gonna do this she had to do it right. She didn't want them resusicating her! Coz they would she knew. A bullet yeah! She decided. Heart or head though? She frowned deep in her dark thoughts.

Amie and Daniel walked into the kitchen.

"Morning Miss." Daniel said.

"Hey Daniel. Ames." she looked at her apologetically. "I'm sorry I blew you off yesterday Ames." Missy said contritely.

Amie glared at her.

"Hey I made something for you." Missy said and picked up a box off the floor. Placed it on the kitchen table. Amie looked at it then Missy in rage. Flung it on the floor and stamped on it.

Missy stood up. Frowning angrily.

"You don't get it do you Miss? It wasn't about the project. That was easy I wanted to spend time with you!" Amie fumed. "Just coz you got your own kid now we don't matter huh?"

Missy didn't hear Amie. Rage was coursing through her. "I spent hours on that Amie!"

"Well I destroyed it in seconds didn't I!" Amie replied.

Missy exhaled. "If you weren't Alice's daughter I'd…" Missy said.

"Don't let that stop you!" Amie yelled. Took a step towards her.

There was a stand off. Missy glaring Amie. Amie shouting at her to do it. Daniel in the middle. Missy was controlling her temper barely. "Missy you never threaten Amie!" Daniel said coldly.

She felt the anger building to mammoth proportions. She stormed from the kitchen and out of the house. Started jogging.

Danny walked from his bedroom yawning. Daniel was having a go at Amie. Danny held an awake Ryan who was staring at him intently. He smiled down at him. He placed Daniel in his bouncer and poured a cup of coffee.

"'S up kids?"

Missy threatened Amie." Daniel said seriously.

Danny who had taken a gulp of coffee choked and spluttered. "What?" he said catching his breath.

"Yeah she did dad." Amie said nodding.

Lexi walked in as Amie was agreeing. "Who did what?" Lexi asked.

"Missy threatened me." Amie told her.

Lexis eyes darkened. "O did she now!" Lexi said in a deadly tone. "It'll be the last thing she ever done!" Lexi vowed.

"Lex!" Danny scolded. "Are you sure? This is Miss you know. What happened?"

"Well I got up and she was sat here with a funny look on her face. Then we walked in a and she was trying to be all nicey nicey like she hadn't just broke a promise. She made me a project so I flung it on the floor and stamped on it. She then said if I wasn't Alice's daughter…" Amie trailed off.

"She'd what?" Danny asked.

"Nothing she was quiet just looked really angry." Daniel told him.

Lexi heard Missy on the phone outside.

"What's up with Miss?" Ethan asked. Carrying EJ and Zoey. He sat down.

"Ethan watch the kids please." Danny asked as Lexi ran from the kitchen. "Oh hell!" he muttered chasing her.

(X)

"You wanna threaten my sister?" Lexi shouted as soon as she was out of the door. Launched at her. They were rolling in the dirt at the bottom of the stairs. Danny reached them and picked Lexi up from Missy. Held her back. Missy stood up and was literally shaking with anger. He could feel it rolling off her in waves. Lexi strained against him. Blood trickled from Missy's lip and she wiped it away.

"People have got a pasting for a lot less than that Lexi!" Missy warned. Her eyes deadly. "So apologise and I'll forget you done it!"

"And if I don't!" Lexi yelled straining. "You've got a cheek saying " should apologise. I didn't threaten a child!"

"Dammit Lexi don't push me!" She said her voice icy. Her tone although steady was in no way calm.

"What the matter you only threaten little girls?"

Missy took a step forward. "Let her go Danny. She wants to sort this like this, then we'll go!"

"Missy GO!" he said.

"I grew up fighting on the hard streets of Glasgow I have no doubt I can take you little girl!" Missy said cockily.

"Let me go dad!" Lexi said fighting.

"Get out of here now Miss!" he asked. He knew what Missy was like when she started. Lexi wouldn't stand a chance. When angry Missy was worse than Alice and Shauna combined. "Please!" he pleaded.

She looked at him. Walked away.

"I'll get you Miss!" Lexi vowed at the back of her head. Missy froze. Danny saw her fists clench. Then she carried on walking.

When Missy was out of ear shot and he was sure she was a fair way away he released Lexi.

"Right I'm gonna go find her!"

"No your not. You know why coz she would have you on the floor in 5 seconds flat. She'd kill you coz you wouldn't back down!"

"She threatened Amie!" Lexi hissed.

"Lexi she isn't herself. Did she resemble our Miss to you?"

"It's still no excuse!" Lexi fumed.

"Lexi you don't get it. If she was herself she wouldn't have done it! Did you hear what she said? She was ready to fight you. This from the woman who was gonna let her best friend tear into her so she could let off steam when I died remember? Did she sound normal to you? She was so angry. She's never angry. I've never seen her in this way before! Something is wrong Lex!"

"I'll be much worse later!" Lexi vowed.

"Lex promise me you won't fight her."

"No!"

"Lexi she is dangerous when she can't control herself. When she loses it. Your mum told me what happened on the day she lost her mum. She hospitalised someone who bad mouthed her. She was completely sober. She just snapped. It took 3 people to get her off them! She nearly got sent down for it. For whatever reason she can't control herself and I don't want you hurt. You wouldn't stand a chance and she'd hate herself if she hurt you. Please Lex. For me. For your mum."

Lexi relented. "Just keep her away from me and the kids!"

"I need to speak to Ethan!" he murmured walking towards the house.

**A/N okay this is all escalating worse and worse. will it get even worse? keep readin to find out. thanks 2 those who r readin and reviewin your great x**


	56. D5 Talking and Other Voices

Ethan was sat in the house. He had a book in front of him of psychiatric disorders God he hoped it wasn't what it sounded like! Missy stormed into the house, like a whirlwind. She slammed her door. He heard her muttering.

"Hey Miss!" Ethan yelled. "Can I come in?"

No reply.

"Yes? Ok then." he walked into her room and closed the door.

Straddled a chair next to the door. Rested his hands on the back. He watched her stuff clothes into a suitcase.

"So Miss how do you feel?" he asked softly. Waited. He knew that if you waited long enough people will fill a silence.

"Angry!" she finally said.

"And why do you feel angry Melissa?" he asked softly.

She glared at him. "Stop trying to analyse me Ethan." she hissed.

"Ok." he couldn't try Rogers. But Perls was far to confrontational for her. He needed to keep a humanistic approach. He stay with Rogers but approach it differently. He'd let her lead.

"Ok Miss. I'm sorry I won't. Where you going?"

"Home!"

"What about Ryan?" he asked. Tone normal. Neutral.

"Ryan?" she asked. "O the baby? I don't care!"

He was taken aback by that statement. He kept his face normal though

"When you look at him what do you see Miss?"

Missy shrugged. "A baby." then she became agitated. Paced.

"What wrong Missy?"

"It's all his fault! I was fine til he came!" she muttered shaking her head. Pacing.

"Who's fault?"

"Ryan's. But I know the truth." she laughed nervously. "Yeah I know the truth they think I'm stupid but I'm not!" her voice had turned calm. But her hands gestured wildly. The calmness of her voice worried him. "NO! I'm not stupid!"

"Your right Melissa." He reverted back into therapist mode. She was gone he hadn't meant to but she had obviously been teetering on the edge of hysteria for a while. "Your not stupid. Tell me what are they hiding?"

"Ryan! He's not mine!" she whispered. Missy was gone. Completely flipped. "See when he was born they switched him. A mother knows her child!"

"yes they do!" he said softly. "Why did they switch him?"

"They're trying to make me crazy but it won't work. Now I know they have to switch him back! They have to! Danny, he's in on it you know! He helped them!" she said in disgust. "That's how the baby looks like him. He got another woman pregnant and that baby which they wanted me to think is mine is actually hers!" she said calmly. Rationally.

"What are your feelings regarding Ryan?"

Ethan knew what she was gonna say or what about she was gonna say. He had been reading about this before she came in. her behaviour combined with how Danny told him she'd been acted alerted him/

Missy looked around. "Can I trust you?" she whispered.

"Of course." he said sincerely.

She scrutinised him. Then frowned. "I hear voices. In my head. They tell me to kill. At first it was myself. It was constant." she shook her head. "But not now. Right now they are screaming at me in my head to find Ryan and kill him. I can't hurt a baby Ethan. I have to go! They are always there Ethan! They won't leave me alone." she grabbed her head "LEAVE ME ALONE! They never go! Always muttering." she trailed off no longer talking to him but herself.

"Melissa focus on MY voice." he said softly. She looked up at him. "I'm here with you Miss. Not them! They aren't real! Focus on my tone. My words." he hypnotised her with his voice. God her psychosis was bad! He got up and went to her.

"Miss I want you to sit on your bed and not move ok!" he said softly he was kneeling on the floor beside her looking in her eyes.

"But the voices are here!" she said panicked. "Telling me to hurt him."

"Melissa I am here and I'm ORDERING you not to hurt him ok!" he said sternly. "I will be a moment!"

God he hated to leave her but he had to phone the hospital. He had to get to a phone.

"Remember Melissa. Stay here. Don't move!"

She sat and closed her eyes. The voices had quieted somewhat. As soon as Ethan was gone though.

"KILL!"

"No I won't. he's a baby!" she argued.

'Kill him he isn't yours. He's proof of a lie. Danny's lies he made him to hurt you!'

"I can't!" she cried. "Not a child."

'KILL KILL KILL KILL' a chant in her head. She was going mad she had to shut them up! She climbed from her bedroom window. Went into the study window. Looked for the keys to the gun cupboard. Couldn't find them so forced the flimsy lock. The voices were being silenced once and for all!

**A/N Sort of a mini chapter here. Wanted this separate from the rest. If your wondering who Rogers and Perls are they are therapists who specialise in humanistic forms of therapy. My guidance and counselling uni course coming through :D i actually learned something haha**

**Poor miss tho she has really snapped. Bt Ethan knows what's wrong! Will he get to her in time b4 she does something stupid with the gun? Will he be able to save her?**


	57. D6 Serious Delusions

Ethan phoned the psychiatric unit at Jo'burg who was sending an ambulance to them. He then rang Danny.

"Danny your right about Miss. She isn't normal. This is serious! She needs to be removed from the house immediately. She has something called Postpartum Psychosis she has completely gone. Out of touch with reality. She is having severe delusions and hallucinations. I did a case study of this for my dissertation in New Zealand. It didn't end well. The patient had delusions like Miss. Heard voices. Like Miss. Combined with sleeplessness, and mood swings it makes them erratic like Miss. It can cause the mother to be suicidal and commit infanticide. She admitted to me she hears voice telling her to kill Ryan!"

Danny swore.

"Too right! And she knows she can't hurt a child but she's agitated. Going mental coz she can't cope. It's good that you have Ryan! And the bigger ones are at school. They don't need to see her like this."

"I'm on my way home Eth. Just keep her safe yeah. Me Lex EJ and Ry will be there soon."

Ethan had approached Missy door. She was gone.

"Dammit I knew I shouldn't have left her. I've only been gone minutes!" Ethan panicked.

"Ethan." Danny asked.

"She climbed out of her bedroom window Danny." he checked in the study and saw the gun cupboard door hanging open. "She's took a gun!" he yelled.

Danny's heart plummeted and his palms started sweating. "You have to find her Ethan."

Ethan had already ran outside. She was stood in front of the house on the dirty ground fiddling with a hand gun.

Ethan walked down the stairs slowly. "Miss just put the gun down yeah." he said softly. Dropped his phone to the floor.

"No Ethan I gotta make them go away!" she said erratically. "I feel like I'm going insane!" she said loudly.

"Miss put the gun down and I'll make them go away!" he promised.

She shook her head. "They won't listen to you, they don't listen to anyone! But I'll make them leave. I'll silence them!"

Ethan slowed his breathing. God this wasn't happening!

"Look Miss I can help you. I'm a therapist. I now how to get rid of them. Please Miss!" he stressed losing it himself.

"No I know how to get rid of them!" she said determinedly. Cocked the gun.

"Bye bye voices. She murmured. Raised the gun.

"What about Amie!" he blurted. Missy froze frowning.

"I let her down then…" she looked sad.

"Daniel?" he added.

"He heard me threaten his baby sister! God I am insane!" she muttered.

"Danny and Ryan?" he realised his mistake when her face froze in anger.

"He lied to me. Constantly. And the kid isn't mine!"

"Dammit what about Alice? She wouldn't want this for you. To kill yourself!"

"I'll be hurt no doubt but I won't die. The voices will be silenced that's all!" she said confidently.

"Think of what it'll do to Shauna to lose you too!"

A car pulled up

(X)

Danny and Lexi climbed out of the car. The babies in the back strapped in safe and sound.

Missy backed off at the sight of them. "Go away!" she yelled. She turned her mistrustful eyes on Ethan. "I trusted you!"

Danny and Lexi stared at Melissa. She was indescribable to the woman they both knew. Her eyes wild, wide and fearful. They glinted with something they hadn't seen before. Something they didn't understand.

"I know what's going on! I know it all! It's not gonna work, you aren't gonna beat me."

Missy was fighting two battles. The voices in her head and the people in front of her she was convinced wanted to send her insane.

Danny took a step towards her.

"No stay there! Your in on it!" she screamed, face pained. Eyes darting everywhere. Her increasingly irrational behaviour had Ethan scared.

"God!" Lexi breathed. "Miss we just wanna help you!" Lexis voice shook. With fear for Missy and with guilt for how she acted earlier. She now knew something was wrong. It was too late now though!

"NO! I know what your all trying to do! Your plans I'm not stupid!" she screamed.

'KILL KILL KILL KILL'

She lowered the gun closed her eyes and grabbed her head. "SHUT UP!"

"Missy." Danny said walking towards her. Desperate to help her.

"Stop right there!" Missy warned standing up straight once again the gun at her temple once more.

"Danny." Ethan warned softly. "She's gone. Unhinged." he breathed.

"Look Miss. Why don't you drop the gun and come inside and explain to us why the plan isn't going to work!" Ethan suggested calmly. Inside he was going mad.

"I will once I have silenced these voice. They need to be quiet it's going too far!" she recocked the gun.

"Missy no!" Lexi was in tears.

"Lex take the kids inside now!" Ethan said. He had a feeling this wasn't gonna end well. She was too far gone to be reasoned with. She trusted no one. He wished Alice was here she'd calm her down. Her face was determined.

"Look wait til Lexi takes the babies inside." he knew how to convince her. "You don't want EJ to see this huh?" he knew if he mentioned Ryan she wouldn't care.

"Hurry!" she said coldly. her eyes darting side to side. Breathing heavily. She shook her head.

"I told you to shut up voices. But no matter you'll be gone soon." she muttered.

"Miss I love you honey put the gun down!" Danny pleaded.

Missy glared at him. She had never looked at him like that before. "No! You wanna make me insane. Your little plot failed I'm on to you! Your trying to drive me away!"

"You fixed me Miss. After Alice died. I couldn't live. I was so sure I'd never love again. I looked up and you were there. Picking me up when I was down. Piecing me back together when I was too broken to fix myself. You helped me never asked for anything in return." he saw her softening. She was watching him. "I love you Miss." she lowered the gun slowly, she was frowning confused.

He walked towards her slowly. "I'd never hurt you Miss. You have to know that I'll always protect you. I love you."

Danny had said I love you once too many times. She raised the gun again quickly.

"Who you trying to convince Danny? Me or yourself? I'm such a fool. How could I ever think I could live up to Alice. She had always been so much better than me!"

Danny stood still. Slowly losing it. She was gonna do it. He could see it in her eyes.

Another car pulled up unexpectedly.

"Right where's my gorgeous nep…"

"O now it's a party!" Missy said angrily. "This end's now!"

"MISSY!" Shauna screamed.

Her head snapped at the sound of Shauna's voice. She froze. "Shay?" she whispered.

"Miss what are you doing?" she ran over to Missy.

"No Shauna don't she's unstable." Ethan whispered. Shauna disregarded him. Was beside her friend in a second. Put her hand on Missy's the one holding the gun and lowered it.

"What you doing Miss trying to give me a heart attack?" she said softly.

Missy and Shauna hugged. Ethan walked to try and retrieve the gun.

Missy pushed Shauna away and put the gun back to her head. "Nice try Ethan!"

Shaun looked at Danny confused.

"They're trying to send me crazy Shauna but you won't let that happen will you? You'll help me won't you!"

"I'm always here for you Miss." Shauna told her.

Missy nodded. "Send them away. Tell them I'm not mad." she whispered. Motioned her head to Ethan and Danny.,

Shauna turned. "Hey guys. Missy is really good right. We wanna catch up alone you know." Winked. 'I'll sort it.' she mouthed.

"Shauna!" Missy said se had saw her jaw move.

She turned her head. "I yawned Miss. Long flight." she lied smoothly. Missy considered then nodded stiffly.

"So she's fine. You misunderstood."

Danny and Ethan nodded.

"Miss can I give Danny a hug? He's missed me. I'm only here a little bit."

Missy considered. Nodded. Shauna hugged him.

"'S up?" she whispered.

"She's snapped."

Shauna nodded.

"Be careful Shauna." he breathed.

"Always am. She's not threat to me I'm positive!"

"Right that's long enough!" Missy said coldly.

Danny and Ethan walked into the house.

"Lets sit down huh Miss?"

"Why are you here Shauna?" Missy asked suspiciously.

"Miss put the gun down and we'll talk." she said stubbornly.

Missy lowered the gun.

"I came to visit you. And my new baby nephew Ryan I thought you'd have a girl first like me and Alice did. But no as usual Miss had to be different."

"I'm not different I'm the same as everyone!" she hissed angrily. "And he isn't my boy!"

"Ok Miss."

Missy was angry. "They switched him on the day he was born! Danny Lexi and Ethan all now and they are all lying to me. You are the only one I can trust!"

Shauna nodded. What on earth was wrong with her friend? She had an idea.

"I've missed you loads Miss." Shauna said. "Can I…" she opened her arms.

Missy smiled. Beamed even. Walked into them.

"Sorry Miss." she clasped her hands around Missy's back tightly.

"Shauna?" Missy asked worriedly.

"DANNY!" Shauna yelled. "Get out here now!"

Danny came sprinting.

"Traitor!" Missy yelled. Wrenched her arms free and raised the gun. Fired.

"MISSY!" Shaun yelled. Pushed her arm up. The bullet fired into the air. Momentum from the force of her push caused them both to go sprawling into the dirt. Missy released the gun instinctively. Shauna grabbed her arms ass eh grabbed for the gun. They struggled. Missy hit Shauna in the mouth with a tight fist. Shauna hit back.

"Stop fighting me Miss. I'd rather not die!" she said seriously. Strained. Danny picked Shaun up from the floor.

"Miss what you doing? We're your family!" he told her softly.

"Your all lying to me!" she jumped up. Ethan had the gun. She frowned. Her plan thwarted. The voices were muttering now. Not as loud.

"No Miss. We love you." Shauna said.

Missy took a threatening step forward.

"Where's our Miss who isn't violent and erratic? Who smiles and laughs and makes jokes? You haven't seen Shauna in over a year and this is how you treat her?"

With the voices quieter she could begin to think a little clearer. His words were penetrating her brain. She frowned at him.

"Where's our Melissa?" Danny asked heatedly.

Missy was breathing heavily. Looking between them everyone wore matching looks of concern. Not deceit or evil. They looked worried! Missy couldn't take it no more! She put her face in her hands and burst into tears. She sobbed. Danny quickly crossed the space between them and gathered her in his arms.

"Ssh honey I have you. I love you." Danny murmured.

"Wh..what is wrong with me Danny?" she wailed.

He moved her over to the stairs. "We're gonna find that out." he promised.

(X)

An ambulance arrived on the property. Danny hadn't released Missy from his embrace.

"Two people climbed out and walked towards her.

"Is that her?" the technician asked.

Danny nodded. Shauna looked pained.

"Come with us Miss."

Melissa pulled away from Danny. "The name is Melissa and go to hell." she backed off. One of them moved quickly and restrained her. The other helped take her to the ambulance. She fought and struggled.

"Why are you doing this to me? She screamed. How could you do this? Help me!" she yelled. "I hate you for not helping me Shauna. I'll never forgive you. Ever!" she screamed. Tears fell from Shauna's eyes.

"Is Ryan our son Miss or just mine?" Danny asked as she was secured in the ambulance. He wanted to keep her home if he could.

She paused. Said nothing. A look passed over her face. "Ours." she lied.

Danny looked at her sadly. "I'll come and visit you soon Miss."

"No Danny!" she yelled as they closed the doors.

"I hate you as well. I hate all of you!" she yelled as they drove off.

**A/N ok so missy is off to a psyciatric hospital. will she get better and come home? keep reading to find out.**


	58. D7 Visit

**2 Days Passed**

Danny was in the living room dressing Ryan. "Don't worry baby mummy will be back soon." he crooned.

Missy was still at the psychiatric unit. Alone. He hadn't been allowed to see her. She needed a settling in transition period. Apparently she would settle better if she didn't see him. The house seemed to empty without her. It was amazing how she had integrated herself into his life so easily. He missed her desperately. More than he thought actually. He was lonely without her chatter and smiles and general madness. He meant that jokingly, best not make a joke anymore. She had lost it. He had always joked, as had she that she wasn't quite sane. Now it seemed it was true. He was going to see her today. Hopefully she would be able to come home soon. And they could raise Ryan and the kids together. Go back to normal and be happy again. That's all he wanted. To be a family.

Shauna was in bits. He had gave her a little background information but he didn't even know what was wrong with her. He knew Ethan had told him an idea but he didn't want Danny to beleive it to be set in stone in case he was wrong. He didn't specialise in pedeatrics. So Danny'd find out what was wrong with her today and hopefully get a time frame for her coming home. He could barely wait to see her. She might have even made an improvement! Be like her old self! He was hoping she was!

"Now Ry you be good for Auntie Shauna and I'm gonna go see mummy ok." the baby made no move. Just stared at him. His little boy was very solemn and quiet. Watchful. Which was weird coz his mum was naturally an extrovert. He supposed Ryan must have got it from him. But even he wasn't as quiet and watchful as Ryan. "You're a little belter aren't you?" he whispered.

Shauna walked in.

"When you see Miss Danny give her my love yeah." Shauna said.

Danny nodded. "You can come next time huh? I just think it might be best if we don't overload her with people." he told her softly.

"I agree. She was just so….not Missy you know."

Danny exhaled. "I don't know what happened. She was normal. Then had Ryan and she just gradually changed over a couple of days till I didn't know who she was anymore."

"Missy has got dark places inside her you know. She suppressed them a lot. I guess with her hormones being all over she just lost it a little. You'll probably walk in there and bring her home." Shauna said hopefully. "They won't keep her there. She's not mad, just confused." she said confidently.

Danny wasn't so sure. Shauna had only seen a little bit. Fair enough that had been her at her worst but if she showed any erratic behaviour at all in the unit and she could be there for…. He didn't wanna think about it. Taking Ryan to see his mother in secure environment. He shook his head. "Yeah." he said in reply.

(X)

Danny had arrived at the hospital an hour ago and spoke to the doctor. He wasn't given good news. Missy had been extremely erratic and had to stay in for a while until the anti psychotic drugs began to work properly. She could still be harmful to herself and to Ryan. His heart plummeted. Before the doctor could go on Danny asked to see her.

"Mr Trevanion…." The doctor started to explain something.

"Can you tell me later I really need to see her." Danny asked.

"It would be best if I tell you something first." the doctors beeper went off. "Excuse me I'm sorry."

Danny tapped his hand on the desk. 10 minutes passed.

A nurse walked in. "Are you waiting to see someone?" she asked.

"Melissa Lynch."

"I'll take you to her."

Danny smiled. "Thanks."

They walked down the corridor. Not talking "Here's her room sir."

"Thank you." he murmured. Knock softly and walked in.

"Hello Miss." she was sat on her bed with her back to him looking out of the window. She didn't reply.

"I'm sorry Miss but this is necessary. I thought you'd at least talk to me." he said pained.

She didn't speak. Didn't move. Didn't even acknowledge his presence.

He walked over to her. "Miss?" he asked. Looked at her.

He felt sick at the expression on her face. Her eyes were blank. Her face expressionless. Shoulders slumped. She didn't blink. Didn't even know he was there.

"Melissa?" he asked. Shook his hand in front of her face.

No response. She didn't even blink. Just stared blankly ahead.

'_Thank God you're here Danny! Help me!' Missy's mind screamed. She tried to force her lips to move but they refused._

"Oh Missy money what have they done to you?" he ran his hand down her cheek. She didn't lean into as she usually did. Just sat still as a statue. He was pained til it turned into red hot anger. He stomped from the room and dragged the doctor he had spoke to into her room.

"What the hell have you done to her?"

The doctor picked up her notes. "I tried to tell you this before Mr Trevanion. I wanted you warned." the doctor exhaled. "She refused to take her medication. Became confrontational and aggressive. We had no choice." the doctor said softly. "We sedated her."

"She's completely out of it! How much did you give her?"

"An adequate dose."

Danny nearly choked as he squeaked the words. "You mean you could have gave her more?" he asked in disbelief. "She has no tolerance for that stuff. She gets loopy off paracetamols. I'm taking her home!"

Danny pulled Missy to standing. Her legs boneless slid back so she was sitting. She hung limply. He put her arm around his shoulder. It slid off. "Missy honey stand up for me." he encouraged.

"She can't hear you Mr Trevanion. And I can't let you take her home. She's extremely unstable and prone to violent outbursts as her medication wears off."

"Violent outbursts? Missy isn't violent!" he hissed.

'_I am not prone to violent outbursts you tell him Danny!" Missy screamed in her head. "Your drugging me for nothing! It's easier than trying to make me better. You just dope me up, against my will and I sit here all day losing my mind!'_

"The hell I can't take her home." Danny fumed. "How can you justify doing this to her?"

He looked at her face. "Missy honey. Can you stand up for me?"

"Confrontational and aggressive Mr Trevanion. She needs anti psychotic drugs. She injured a nurse. head butted her!" the doctor said seriously.

'_Liar!' Missy screamed again. I moved my head to stop her putting the drugs in my mouth. She moved it at the same time and we clattered. I was being held down by my arms. I could defend myself. Her head was in the way. She bit me!'_

"No." Danny said in disbelief. "She wouldn't do that." he was looking at her worried now.

'_No Danny don't believe him please. You know I'm not violent! I'm not!" she pleaded silently. 'Stupid vegetive body! Thank God he's taking me home though. Once the drugs have wore off I'll tell him everything and he'll understand!'_

"Mr Trevanion looking at Miss Lynch's file I know you are her partner and she has just gave birth a little over a week ago. She is suffering from a severe case of Postpartum psychosis. She needs round the clock care. Needs to be watched at all times. Can you really care for a newborn and Melissa in her current state of mind?"

'_My mind is freaking fine! How do you know what my mind is like you keep me so doped I can't string two words together!' she willed Danny to hear he thoughts. She saw Danny was wavering 'No Danny you can't leave me here! This is what happened to my aunt. They locked her up and she topped herself!'_

"No I can't care for her full time." he admitted he had the animal hospital too.

"Believe me we are taking the best possible care of her Mr Trevanion. As soon as we have proof that her delusions are subsiding the sedation will cease and she will be on her room to recovery."

Danny nodded. Looked at her. Sadness on his green eyes. He seemed to be searching her face.

'_I'm here Danny! Right here!' she told him. Tried to project it into her eyes._

"If you come to see me before you leave I will give you some leaflets on how to help your family to cope with this too." the doctor said and left the room.

"I'm sorry this has happened to you Miss. I think if I knew they were gonna do this to you I would have insisted you stay at home."

'_Yeah right. Shipped me off to the loony bin first chance you got! i must say you did well. You accomplished in a year what Alice and Shauna couldn't do for years!'_

"I just don't want you to hurt yourself! I couldn't bear it if I lost you!" he held her hand. "I know you'll be better soon and we'll go home and be better. The kids understand your ill and just want you home. They miss you lots."

'Y_eah I bet you told them I was sick in the head!' she thought snappily._

"I know all this aggression they say your exhibiting isn't you. And you don't know what your doing. You'd never hurt a fly which is why I've been so worried about you I mean you looked ready to tear Lexi apart!"

_She had been! She had berated herself continuously for what she said to Amie and did to Lexi. What had she been thinking? She was disgusted with herself. There was no excuse!_

"But Lex understands and she just wants you home where you belong. I'll be back home to see you soon honey. I'll bring pictures of the kids. Got a couple of nice new ones of Ryan." he kissed her cheek.

'_Please Danny you can't leave me here!' she pleaded silently. _

A male nurse walked into her room. "Sorry sir. You'll have to go."

'_Oh God not Clive!' He creeped her out and had wandering hands._

"See you soon Miss. Love you. Miss you too." he pressed a final kiss to her hand. She saw him take one last sad look at her before he left.

_Her mood dropped even lower than it had been before he visited. She had counted on him, taking her home. They had packed him full of lies. No wonder he left her he probably thought she was a psycho._

Missy felt desolate. Clive was beside her.

"Open wide for Clivey baby." he whispered.

'_Go to hell creep!' she thought._

He used his hand to pry open her mouth. Popped in a couple of pills. She'd show him. Swallowed. _Dammit! She thought_

"More sedation baby!" he caressed her face. Missy yearned to spit in his face. Anything.

'_I'm so gonna get you when I'm better I swear and you know something else I'm gonna enjoy it too!" she vowed._

"I'll see you tonight. I'm on lates. We'll be alone." he winked. Missy didn't like the sexual connotations in his words.

He had lain her down on the bed. She turned her face a little forced one little pill from her mouth. One had slid down her throat though. She just had to hope that that one pill wouldn't incapacitate her much!

**A/N ok missy is heavily sedated in hospital but by the sounds of things she sounds alot better so y is she still sedated and will clive have his evil way? at least she spat one pill out bt wil that b enough? keep reading**


	59. D8 Release?

Danny was in the car driving home. It had been so hard seeing her like that. She wasn't his Missy anymore. Alice's Missy. Shauna's Missy. With a quick grin and a joke on her tongue. She was a mindless zombie. If he could take her home. Care for her himself he would but Ryan took precedence and if there was still a chance she'd harm him then she had to stay where she was! He pulled into Leopards Den feeling guilt and sadness over the woman he loved. She had cracked up and there was nothing he could do to help her. He had sat in the car when he left the hospital and read the leaflets the doctor gave him. They had worried him seriously worried him!

He sat in his car for a moment at home. Collected himself and climbed out. God what had they done to he though! She was gonna get better right? She wouldn't be like that forever would she? That was what worried him.

He walked into the house.

"Where's Missy?" Shauna asked murmuring to Ryan.

"Shauna Missy has been sectioned." he said quietly.

Shauna laughed expecting Missy to jump out any second. "I always knew that would happen." she waited but Missy didn't appear. She saw Danny's ashen face. "Oh God your not joking are you?" she asked in shock.

"No joke Shauna. She cracked up after Ryan's birth. Heard voices in her head. You were here when she threatened to shoot herself."

Shauna rubbed her head worriedly. "How is she?"

"Heavily sedated at the moment. Aggressive and confrontational they said. I saw her Shauna and it broke my heart!"

"Aggressive and confrontational? But that's not our Miss. She barely loses her temper. Keeps it reined in. it's only if she is upset she loses it. She should be happy after the birth of Ryan. I spoke to her the night before he was born and she was so excited dying to meet him. Was asking me tips on how to bring on labour!"

"I agree about the aggressiveness but Shauna you weren't here when she and Lexi nearly got into it. Usually she wouldn't have batted an eyelash, walked away til Lex cooled down but Shauna she looked like she wanted to go toe to toe with Lex. I had to plead with her to walk away!"

"Thank God you did. If she is having problems with her temper she wouldn't have stopped!" Shauna said in relief. "When she finally calmed down she would have literally hated herself for doing that to her!"

"You don't know the half of it Shauna, she's been having the worst mood swings the slightest little thing sets her off. She even came home drunk!"

"Wow. Now that isn't like Melissa. She's never been a alcohol person. Ever. She knows she struggles to control her temper at the best of times without bringing alcohol into it!"

"Shauna I don't want you seeing her. The sedation, she's just blank. Like a zombie. Nothing penetrated her haze. She just sat there. I was half expecting wise cracks but she didn't even blink. She didn't even turn her head to look at me."

"God out of the three of us I would have literally said that Missy was the least likely to get sectioned. See she had the humour as an outlet. I was the one who would lash out. Alice she internalised. But everything just seemed to slide off Missy's back!" She went silent and frowned then asked. "Why is she in there?"

"Ethan was right, Postpartum Psychosis. It's a step up from post natal depression. Basically she has lost grip of reality and believes that delusions in her head are real. She hears voices telling her to kill herself and Ryan. She believed that I had cheated on her and got another woman pregnant and we switched the baby coz I wanted her to go insane. She always seemed to agitated. Twitchy like I said her rapid mood swings had me on edge. I thought it was coz she wasn't eating or sleeping. If I'd known I would have…"

"I know you would have got her help. Don't beat yourself up Danny. You seen how she reacted she would have rejected the help."

He exhaled. "But I love her. She was paranoid and that isn't Miss. I just feel so guilty I feel like all this could have been prevented you know."

"Not if I know Miss. She would have dug her heels in and then turned it around so you were considering whether it was you who had the problem. She manipulates very easily. She used to do it to me and Alice all the time. We'd be giving her the answers to homework and we didn't even know. She didn't mean no harm though it was always in fun. I just thought I'd warn you though."

"They are keeping her in coz of the aggressiveness and there is a risk of suicide and infanticide. She is there for her safety and Ryan's. She's been given anti psychotic drugs. She's gonna hate me when she gets out."

"No she won't Danny. When she's better she'll know you did it for her because you love her."

"Then why do I feel so guilty?"

"Coz you love her and you feel responsible for her being there. But Danny don't think like that huh? She will get better. Believe it. Then she'll act like it never happened."

He shrugged. Gathered his son close. His once green eyes were now a light brown. Like his mum's. He stared at them.

"Happened with the twins too. They were born with baby blue eyes just like James and within two weeks I was looking at my eyes."

"Na I like it. They are nice. He suits his mothers eyes." he said wistfully wishing he was looking at Missy's face.

They shared a companionable silence for a few moments.

"I still can't believe they sectioned her." Silence "Missy!" she stressed in disbelief. "If anything out of all of us she was the sanest!" she repeated.

Danny nodded sadly. Decided to have a lie down with Ryan. Suddenly he was unexplainably weary.

(X)

Missy lay in bed blinking that night.

"Right focus Miss. Stay awake, No sleep! God she should be able to stay awake she had did it often enough the past week. Her eyes felt heavy. She counted the tiles on the ceiling. One tile. Two tiles. Three tiles. She focused on each one intently. Picked the exact shade of paint it was. The stains on the ceiling she made shapes from them. God that tablet must have been a sleeping tablet. She wiggled her toes and felt them move. She smiled and felt her face twitch. Ok she at least she knew she could move! She felt her eyes begin to close. She knew only one thing would keep her awake. But she didn't want to. It went against every rule she made for herself. If she did this she would end up a psycho by the end! But she had to do this. She couldn't go to sleep. Clive'd attack her and she wouldn't even know! At least if she was awake she could fight him off! She had to do this. She exhaled and let her mind opened the doors she had welded shut. She thought of….

"Andy." she whispered.

Felt sick to her stomach as his face materialised in her mind. His sick grin as he stared at her. The way his eyes looked like he was undressing her. "God!" she whispered.

She was inundated with smells and sounds. Images. God she really was gonna throw up!

Missy went through all that but to no avail. Her eyes closed of their own accord. Only now she dreamt of Andy!

(-)

Missy was locked in a small square room. She was her teenage self with an adult mind. Her adult mind told her to fight. To kick and scream and rage til he left her alone but her teenage body cowered in fear of him.

_What you scared of your not scared of anything! She screamed at herself. Hit out at him!_

"Didn't I say you'd always be mine Melissa! Now she remembered why she hated being called by Melissa. He called her it. The only person who could call her Melissa was Danny. It sounded nice the way he said it. Andy made it sound dirty!

"You can't let me go." he toyed with a piece of her hair in his fingers.

"_Get him off you don't just stand there!" she again screamed. Her body was frozen in fear. "Your useless!"_

"I'm always with you. Even when your with Danny I'm right there with you. Stopping you from being happy. You can't forget me." he said happily. "Can't let me go!"

_Like hell! She roared in her mind. Then why won't you marry Danny then? She asked herself. She felt her mind freeze at the question, why wasn't she marrying Danny? Coz she didn't wanna be controlled? But her fear of control stemmed from the man in front of her. _

"Leave me alone!" her 12 year old self said. Her voice scared and wobbly.

"_You finally speak. Do something anything don't let him do this to you again! For Gods sake hear me!"_

Her body was backing away and she fell on a bed that appeared from no where. Andy was above her crowing at her in victory. Her 12 year old self finally hit out and her mind screamed in happiness.

"Leave me alone!" she yelled firmly.

_That's it kid!_

She just hit and hit hit and hit. It felt cathartic. Andy backed off.

It was weird thought she still felt rough hands on her chest. Felt warm breath and moist and putrid in her face.

Andy stood there. "Don't fight Clivey baby!" he said in a foreign voice then disappeared.

**A/N I think that Missy's dream was my way of saying that missy isn't viewing her attack as an adult. She is still reacting to it in a child's way rather than getting over it and moving on. I think this was a release for her in a way as she realised that she a had been chained to Andy for too long and it made her sick she had carried him through her life. She is being released from her metaphorical chains. Sorry I didn't mean to explain that to you I have just worked it out in my head right there usually I know why I'm writing something. ok so no more andy she will marry danny but will other stuff stand in the way of this, like her being in a pshyciatric ward? keep reading**

**and will she get away from clive hmmmm?**


	60. D9 Escape

Missy opened her eyes groggily. Felt someone with tight hands around her wrists. Restraining her.

"C'mon baby." he whispered close to her ear. Her eyes focused and Clive was over her. Straddling her. She was struggling but he was getting more enjoyment out of it. Lets see if the bastard enjoys this! She flung her head forward and it connected with his nose. It exploded and he grunted. Blood dripped onto her face.

He lifted his knees up to get away. She took her chance. She raised her leg and hit him in the family jewels as he lifted his leg to get off her. He groaned.

"Bastard! No one touches me!" she hissed. She pushed him off her and climbed up. Bashed him over the head with her clock. He lay still.

"Worse will happen if you try again!" not that he would ever get the chance. She was getting out of here. Nothing short of death was keeping her from getting out of here! She had to or she would go insane.

She grabbed the jeans that dangled from his belt. Peeked her head from the door. Right the coast was clear. She was gone! She opened the door and closed it behind her softly made her way down the corridor. Her feet made slapping sounds against the marble so she ran on her tip toes. She wished she had put socks on but that couldn't be helped and would have used precious seconds she didn't have. She flattened herself against a wall and she peeked around a corner. Again clear. She returned on her escape mission. Moving stealthily. God this was too easy! She was gonna get out.

A siren split the air.

"Bastard!" she yelled. He's awake! Her heart began to race and she began to panic. No need for silence now she simply ran. She ran as fast as she could. Opened a locked gate with the keys. She dropped the keys with how much her hands were shaking. They couldn't catch her. They couldn't keep her in here!

Suddenly a group of people were in front of her. They had guns!

"Shit!" she hissed. Ducked and weaved as she ran in the opposite direction a dart whizzed past her head.

"Fucking hell!" she yelled. Ducking more. She locked the door and snapped the key off in the lock. She saw them get on radios. She ran around another corner and again was up against a group of people, she was trapped!

"Melissa!" her doctor said angrily.

"Go to hell!" she shouted. Right Sod it! If she was trapped she was going down swinging. She ran full pelt at the people in front of her. Took one of them out with a hard shoulder barge. They slid across the floor. The impact jarred her. She swung her arm at someones head but didn't feel a connection. All she felt two sets of hands grab her and fling her on the ground. Hands behind her back. She wriggled and jerked.

"No you bastards. LEMME GO!"

Her doctor was beside her on his knees. "I'm afraid we can't do that Melissa!" he said softly.

She was lifted and her arms were held tightly behind her back. So tightly her chest ached when she inhaled.

"I'm fine now. I don't need to be sedated!" she said calmly.

"No Melissa!" he doctor said leading her down a corridor. "You are not fine. You need drugs!"

"I refuse!" she told him. He turned and slapped her. Her cheek stung. Her face turned angry and venomous. She spat in his face. Got him in the eye. She smiled smugly.

She was pushed into he infirmary. The doctor looked at her. "You don't do things like that to people who are better than you Melissa!" he withdrew a very very large needle. Missy's eyes widened at the sight of it. Then her face turned neutral. The doctor filled it with clear liquid from a sealed vial.

"NO! This isn't happening!" she yelled and fought even harder. With all the strength she had in her body.

"Yes Missy it is. See you need specialist one on one care. Of course I can do that but the state don't know that. We in turn get so much more funding. All for you. Let me tell you a little secret. We aren't giving you anti-psychotic drugs. We were at first but then I had my idea. You aren't gonna get better Melissa I'm gonna be giving you drugs which will make your delusions much more vivid and frightening. Your gonna make this hospital a lot of money. Doctors will wanna study you!" he said happily.

"I no one's lab rat!" she screamed and kicked out hit his stomach. He grunted. He raised his hand to hit her again then decided against it.

"Full on care Melissa. Enjoy it. And your delusions!" he said nastily. Stabbed her in the arm hard. She hissed. He pressed the plunger and the drugs flooded into her body.

"Repeat after me Melissa. I need sedated!"

"I…I won't." she stuttered. Head lolling forward. Her body began to go boneless.

"I need sedated!" he repeated.

"No." she said weakly. "I refuse. I don't!"

"Ah we have a tough one." he smiled. "They are always the most fun to break. You will though. I'm certain of it!"

He refilled the needle and plunged it in her arm again after a minute she had collapsed completely.

"Melissa." he lifted her head. Looked in her eyes and watched as the blank look was coming. They were completely blank again.

"What do you think?" he asked softly.

"I need sedated." she said softly. Slurred.

"Good!" he smiled. "Take her back to her room. Use the restraints." he dropped her head and it fell forward.

**A/N me thinks that this doctor is evil! Missy gave it her best shot what is gonna happen 2 her?**


	61. D10 Anger

Danny slept fitfully that night. Alice flitted in and out of his dreams. It unsettled him. He kept trying to talk to her. Get her opinion and advice on how to help Missy but she always disappeared before he could open his mouth. He tossed and turned all night till Ryan's impatient hungry wails filled his room.

"Hey son." he said and nuzzled Ryan's cheek with his face after he picked him up. He walked into the kitchen changed him while he waited for his bottle to heat. A man multi tasking. Who would have thought it? "We're good. Not long for breakfast yeah?"

After a few more minutes the bottle suitably warmed was in Ryan's mouth and he was suckling hungrily. Danny yawned involuntarily. He fed every three hours and he was starting to feel it. He looked down and looked at Ryan. His once green eyes were now a soft chocolate brown. With green flecks. His face was changing too, along with the big brown eyes he had light brown hair with a blond tint. His face was starting to go round with a tiny button nose. He saw Missy in Ryan's face. There was a twinkle of mischievousness in his eyes that was his mother all over. He needed her back here. He missed her so much. Her inane chatter. Her practical jokes. Her dry humour. The way he had to think on his feet so she didn't get one over on him. He just wanted her beside him. He felt so alone. He imagined her beside him admiring the baby they made together. All he could hear was he isn't mine! You lied! Her musical tone tinged with a angry mistrustful edge.

"You know Ryan you're the best gift your mum ever gave me." he whispered. "Same as Auntie Alice with your brothers and sisters. Mummy'll be back soon ok. She's a fighter. Backs down for no one and nothing. I know she'll beat this for you. She doesn't know it yet but she will. She loves you so much. She was so scared and nervous about you. Yeah your big tough mummy scared of a tiny baby but she was. Then she felt you kick. She squealed in fright actually. I remember she was sitting in here eating ice cream and moping. I heard this high pitched squeal. I came running of course and saw her with her head under the table. I was like what on earth are you doing? And she said something hit her stomach and she wanted to know what it was. You kicked again and she jumped banged her head off the table." Danny smiled at her reaction. "She sat down again and I told her it was just you saying hello. She went all misty eyed and guided my hand to where she felt it and again you kicked. And her face son, she was in complete awe of you. I never saw her scared again after that." Danny ran his finger down's his son's cheek. "Mummy does love you baby. Believe that always."

Shauna stood at the door.

"Awww that is so adorable. Is it true?"

"Every word. Even looking under the table. She is so daft sometimes!" he said softly.

Shauna nodded, "She is. She'll be home soon Danny."

"I need her home now. I miss her so much!" he said sadly.

"How about we both go see her today? you never know seeing me, her childhood friend might perk her up. It worked with the gun."

Danny was dubious. "Shauna."

"Look Danny I'm not a child. You can't protect me from this. I won't let you!"

He nodded. I'll drop the kids off at school and see if Lexi and Ethan will watch little man for an hour."

"Yeah you best leave Ryan here. She might snap if she sees him." Shauna agreed. Poured herself a cup of coffee and sipped thoughtfully.

(X)

Danny and Shauna were sat at the hospital's car park. "Right what can I expect?"

"Not Missy. When I saw her she didn't talk. Didn't move. Didn't even blink! She just sat there. She might not be sedated heavily today though!" he said hopefully.

They climbed from the car and walked thought the hospital.

"Her doctor is busy so how about I take you straight through?" a nurse said softly.

They nodded in thanks.

The stopped at Missy's room. Shauna's hand on the handle. Danny put his hand over hers. "Remember Shauna." he whispered.

He removed her hand and opened the door.

Shauna steeled herself.

Danny gasped as he walked in. Shauna couldn't contain her cry of anguish either. She ran over.

Missy lay on a bed. Straps around her wrists and ankles. Her eyes open although she may have been asleep for all the animation they held. She was as usual blank.

"God are these necessary?" Shauna asked visibly upset. Pulled at the straps that held her tightly onto the bed. "Miss?" she said and put her hand on her cheek. "Miss it's Shay." Melissa's eyes barely open didn't move." Not even a flicker of recognition in her eyes. They remained glazed and unfocused. "C'mon Miss I've known you since we were six years old!" she pleaded.

Melissa remained unmoving.

Clive walked into Missy's room carrying a silver tray.

"Why is she strapped to the bed like this?" Shauna asked angrily. Danny was sat on a chair staring at her.

"She broke my nose last night. Plotted her own little escape. The good doctor had her little episode on tape. So if you'll excuse me Melissa needs her…" Shauna hit the bottom of the tray the needle flew across the room. Took a step forward so she was right in front of him. "She doesn't need more drugs she needs help!" she hissed.

"Melissa." Clive asked.

Missy said nothing.

"Melissa!" he repeated angrily.

"I…need…sedated." she said softly. A whisper. Robotically. Like she'd been trained. Shauna frowned. Clive smiled superiorly.

"Before she has any needles I wanna talk to her doctor!" Shauna said icily. She went back to Missy.

Shauna squeezed Missy's hand. "I swear I'll sort this for you!" she murmured.

"Ok lady it'll make no difference." Clive said and stood on the other side of Missy's bed.

Shauna narrowed her eyes.

"I promise this happens no more Miss! I'm gonna kick off if this isn't changed." Shauna vowed. She looked at Danny. "She needs care Danny! Restraints aren't care! And all drugs do is keep her dumb and quiet. She deserves better than that!"

Shauna ran her hand down Missy's cheek.

Her doctor appeared. "Clive why hasn't she…who are you?" he asked Shauna who looked irate

Danny stood up.

"Hello Mr Trevanion. Who is your friend?"

"Miss I'm gonna kick your ass if you don't give me a damn good reason why my best friend resembles a zombie from a cheap horror movie!" Shauna spat.

"Last night Melissa spat out her medicine and staged a little break out."

Shauna smiled. "Only Miss!" she murmured.

"She didn't get far of course. We had to restrain her.

While Danny and Shauna were looking at the doctor Clive slipped a white pill from his pocket in missy's mouth covertly.

Shauna looked back at Missy whose face was creased in a frown.

"No. No!" Missy murmured. Her head was moving back and forth jerkily.

Shauna was beside her in a second. "Miss?"

Missy eyes finally opened. She looked at Shauna confused.

"Miss it's me Shauna." she said softly. "Do you recognise me?"

Missy didn't see Shauna. She saw a hag with sunken eyes and rotten skin which hung off her body in clumps. Her straggly greasy hair had beetles crawling in it. One crawled on her face and a forked tongue flicked out from her mouth and caught it. Pulled it to her mouth and she chewed it with a crunch.

"Get away from me!" Missy screamed. Strained against her bounds.

She looked down and saw that the bounds were chains and Shauna's hand was simply bones. She shrinked her hand away. Tears leaked from her eyes. The hag put her face closer. Missy's head lifted off the bed to head butt her. Shauna moved just in time. Shauna was shocked.

"I'll kill you!" she warned her voice cold and hard. The statement was a vow. "Leave me alone!"

"Shauna it's Missy." Shauna repeated. Seeing her friend this way was upsetting. Danny came up behind her and pulled her away.

"Look I'm going to have to ask you to leave. Melissa needs her medication. She shouldn't be agitated in this way!" the doctor said smugly.

"Look at what the medication is doing to her though! She isn't the type to act this way! Especially to me!" she pulled from Danny's grip.

The doctor lost patience. "Come with me!" he fumed.

Shauna glared at Clive as she passed. He held the sinister needle. "Bastard!" she hissed.

(X)

They were led into the doctor's office. He had a VCR and TV set up. He pushed the tape inside and pressed play. Shauna stood her arms crossed. Danny looked nervous.

They saw Missy hurrying down a corridor. Being careful and stealthy. She knew exactly what she was doing. Shauna was smiling. "Go Miss!" she's good! She thought. As the tape progressed they saw Missy nearly get out then when caught she shoulder barged someone who literally slid across the floor.

Shauna bit back a smile.

When restrained she started lashing out.

"LEMMO GO!" they heard.

The doctor paused the tape. It stopped on Missy's angry face. He couldn't have paused it on a better spot if he tried.

"As you can see she is unstable!"

"She seemed perfectly coherent to me. Look at her. If she was unstable she wouldn't have been so careful!" Shauna argued.

"She tried to break out of a locked secure facility. Does that seem like normal behaviour to you?"

"Yes if she was being held here against her will. She would have made it too!" Shauna looked at Danny. "Danny obviously Missy is getting better if she planned that on the spur of the moment. She's getting back to normal!"

Danny frowned. Again looked at the face on tape. She didn't resemble Melissa.

"Danny don't look at that tape. That isn't her!"

"Obviously Miss it is!" the doctor said smugly.

Shauna glared at him. Looked back at Danny. "I think we should talk her home Danny. All they are doing is pumping her full of drugs. That isn't gonna make her better. You seen her there."

"Her drugs had wore off there Mr Trevanion if you go in there now she will be calm. Do you really want behaviour like that around your kids?" the doctor countered. He had seen Clive slip her the white pill. Quick thinking from him.

"Will you be quiet!" Shauna snapped.

"Excuse me but are you a qualified doctor?" the doctor asked.

Shauna shot him an icy glare.

"I thought not! Don't tell me what is best for my patient!"

"Don't tell me what is best for my best friend! I have know her nearly 40 years you have known her 5 minutes." she hissed. "And you!" she turned to Danny. "Are you just gonna stand there and let them destroy Melissa's mind with drugs?"

"Shauna she's ill." Danny told her softly.

"God you are!" she said in disgust. "She needs support. Not sedated all the time. You heard her on that tape. She said she was fine! She didn't sound insane. She knew what she was saying and doing."

"She'd say that if she was ill!" the doctor cut in.

"And she'd say it if she was better too. You know us Danny me and Alice knew her better than anyone and I know she isn't insane!" Shauna said confidently.

He looked torn. "Shauna, this is the best place possible for her." Danny said softly.

Shauna's jaw dropped. "I can't believe you are letting this happen to her. You of all people! You say you love her!" she said nastily.

The doctor smiled victoriously.

"And you wipe that smile off your face before I smack it off!" she warned "I'm already pissed at you for what your doing to my friend so don't push me!" her eyes were black with anger.

Shauna took a step forward. Danny stopped her. "Get your hands off me Daniel!" walked from the room before she lost it and laid into both of them. She heard them murmuring.

"Does she need something to calm her down. We can give her a pill." the doctor asked.

The urge to run back and hit the doctor overwhelmed her. The squashed it and went to see Miss. She was out of here! If it was the last thing Shauna did.

(X)

Shauna walked beside Melissa's bed. She was still strapped down completely unresponsive. To Shauna she looked depressed. It killed her but she had to leave her here. For now anyway! Shauna looked behind her made sure she was alone. Looked back at her friend her eyes were moving down. Just slightly almost not moving at all.

"What is it Miss?" she asked. Grabbed her hand. Felt a piece of torn cloth clutched in her fingers tightly. Shauna looked at it. 'Help Me!' was written on in red ink.

"Oh Miss." she said sadly. "I swear I will! Look." she looked behind her again and lowered her voice. "I'm gonna get you out of here ok. I don't know how yet but I will! Just try not to take your meds tonight. I'll be here tonight to get you. Then we'll make our way back to Scotland and get you proper care ok! Give me a small flick if you understood."

Missy didn't move at all. Shauna's mind was made up. She was getting her out of here come hell or high water!

"I'm not letting this continue Miss. What they are doing to you is wrong. Danny is a fool believing every word that doctor says. The doctor is shifty and a creep by the way. Anyway tonight Miss. Don't worry I'll sort everything!"

Shauna quieted as Danny walked into the room. "How is she?" he asked.

Shauna spun. "Out of it. This isn't fair to her! Look at her!" she hissed. Anger raised again.

"Look Shauna I can't stand seeing her in that way either but it's for the best!" he stressed.

"For who? You or her? It's much easier for you to let her brain go to mush in here then to take care of her at home!" she fumed.

"That isn't true Shauna and you know it! I can't handle the kids, the hospital and Missy at the same time. Someone would eventually get hurt and it would probably be her!"

"You would have found a way for Alice!" she spat.

He froze and frowned. Knew that deep down the statement was true. So what did that say about his feelings for Melissa?

"No denials then? You something Daniel she's far too good for you! I'm going home tonight I really can't even look at you right now. Miss I'll phone the hospital each day about you." pressed a kiss to her cheek. "See you later." gave her a squeeze then walked away. Pushed passed Danny.

"Take care of yourself somehow Miss. No one else will!" Shauna said pointedly and stormed from the hospital angrily. Decided to have a look around the building for later.

Danny sat beside Missy's bed. His mind reeling.

"I do love you." he told her softly. "You know why I can't get you out of here don't you?"

She was silent. Guilt plagued him.

"She's wrong you know. If this was Alice I would leave her here if it was what's best."

He knew it was wrong as soon as the lie fell from his lips.

"Miss I'm sorry honey but I don't know what to do. How to care of you. I do love you and I'll be back soon. My head's all over I gotta go!"

He rushed out to find Shauna standing by the car. Arms crossed. Belligerent expression.

"Shauna I do love her." he said as he climbed into the car. "But I have the kids to think about. Especially Ryan!"

Shauna made a face at him. "Don't even talk to me Daniel. I seriously hate you right now. SHE loves you above everything else. Would do anything for you. I thought you'd do the same. She thought that too. Seems we were both wrong about you. You say you love her but I'm not sure you do and you know something else you aren't sure now either!" she told him.

NO he wasn't doubting his feelings. Then why had he practically ran from her room. Why had he left her there. Why….

"Shut up Shauna!" he spat.

"Truth hurt Daniel?"

He bit back a scathing retort. "If you can only berate me for something that isn't my fault then why don't you just be quiet!"

Shauna narrowed her eyes. "Daft thing is even though you don't even care enough to get her out of there she'll still love you. See she's like that when she loves someone she doesn't hold back at all. She'd move heaven and earth to get you outta there. Why can't you do the same for her?"

He rubbed his eyes. God they were fighting in the car.

"It's bad enough you stole one of my best friends and dragged her down here. You then do it to another of my friends and get them locked in a mental institution in the process!" Shauna yelled.

Danny counted to ten this was going too far!

Shauna crossed her arms. As soon as Missy was outta there and back in Scotland Missy wouldn't be coming back here! Shauna was gonna make sure of it!

They drove in a stilted silence back to Leopards Den. Climbed from the car.

"For your information I didn't steal your best friends!" he said icily. That comment had irritated him long enough.

She scoffed and ignored him. "Go jump off a cliff Danny!"

"This isn't my fault Shauna!" he said temper rising.

"Isn't it? She was perfectly happy in Glasgow. With her little business and Karl til you turned her life upside down. Now when she would phone me I didn't recognise her anymore. She was always so confident but all I could hear was her second guessing herself. Should I do this this way or that another way. And no maybe that isn't your fault but you made no move to make her better did you? Didn't you see she was trying so hard to live up to Alice? Alice was, is the perfect mum, perfect wife. Perfect for you. Perfect everything and before you turn this around I don't mean that in a bad way I love Alice as much as you do!"

"But I don't expect her to be Alice! I love her because she is the opposite of Alice."

"Have you ever told her she hasn't got to live up to her?"

"I told her I love her because she isn't like her!" he told her angrily.

"That's not what I'm saying. Have you ever said to her I don't care if our nothing like Alice I love you for you!"

"Not in so many words. But I don't have to coz she knows."

"No Danny she didn't and you know what now she's cracked up!"

He quieted.

"And by the way think about the name of what she's got. Postpartum psychosis. I think you'll find it IS partially your fault. Unless your not Ryan's father that is!"

That thought had never occurred to him before. She was right. If he and Missy hadn't had a child then she'd still be here. Fine. Normal. All the stuff he'd read had told him that it was more common with people who had trauma in their background among other things

"And you know why she kicked off when she was being dragged away? When Missy was 13 her aunt was locked up in a psychiatric ward. 3 weeks after she got out Missy's mum and Miss when to check on her. Her mum found an empty bottle of pills and a note in the bedroom. But no body. Missy hadn't seen the note told her mum she needed to go to the bathroom. Found her aunt hanging by the shower pole in there."

Danny paled.

"If I remembered that tidbit of information when they came to get her I'd never have let them take her! Goodbye Danny!" stormed to her room. Had plans to make. Was unsure whether or not to ask Lex for help. God she wished Alice was here!

**A/N now there is trouble Shauna has made Danny doubt how much he loves her. If at all! But Shauna to the rescue. She's gonna break Miss out of the hospital GO SHAUNA lol**

**I think Shauna defo needs anger management tho she doesn't think about what she says wen angry!**

**sorry 4 lateish update been freezing to death setting off fireworks. my bby loved it tho :D x**


	62. D11 Help!

"Ethan I need your help!" Shauna declared after dialling his number. "I need to get Missy out of that hospital!"

"It's the best place for her Shauna!"

"But they are sedating her. She is strapped to a bed for God's sake!"

"Her meds should be working by now!" he said angrily.

"I'm getting her out of there Eth. With or without your help!"

"I'll ring you back Shauna."

He disconnected. Shit he was phoning the police! She panicked. What if he got her sectioned to? She'd rather die! She stuffed clothes in her suitcase quickly. Ethan rang back.

"I'm telling you this now Ethan I'm completely sane!" she hissed.

"Huh? I just rang to tell you that I have Liv coming round. Me and Thabo will be able to meet you around 10 o'clock."

"O I thought you were gonna get me sectioned."

"The thought had crossed my mind." he admitted.

"Watch what your saying bonny lad!" he chuckled. "Look Eth wear black."

"God this sounds like a bad spy movie!"

"Hey if I have to I will kick ass!" she declared laughing. "Do you know where Danny keeps his passports?"

"Why?" Ethan asked suspiciously.

"Coz I'm going home and he has mine."

"I don't believe you." he said.

"Fine if she'd found in South Africa they're just gonna stick her in a more secure unit and none of us will have access to her. I'm taking her home to Scotland until she is better." and til she could get Danny's claws out of her too. "Danny knows I'm going home if you tell me where her passport is I'll make sure you have deniability. Tell Lex you and Thabo are going out for a drink or something.

Ethan quieted.

"She can't go back there Ethan and if you don't help and I get caught I'll know exactly who to come to. I'll never forgive you. Alice won't either. When I get her out she is going to need time and space to get better!"

"The passports are in the study. In the drawer in the safe."

She nodded.

"If she's ok when I see her then I say she stays though!" he said. "Or if I think of a better plan." he added.

Shauna stayed silent. She was making no promises. "Can I come and wait over there say goodbye to Lex and the kids?"

"Ok. See you soon."

"See you." she replied. Disconnected went into the study and collected Missy's passport. They might have to stay in a hotel tonight and leave tomorrow. It was a shame she couldn't take Ryan but she wasn't kidnapping a child. No way! He was in good hands with his dad. As much as she thought Danny was treating Missy abhorrently he was a good father to his kids.

"I'll find a way to get you outta there Miss!" she vowed softly.

After returning to her bedroom she heard a soft knock. Danny walked in.

"Look Shauna I'm doing what's best for Miss. I do love her."

"Just not as much as Alice."

"No!" he denied.

"She deserves to be first!" and when Shauna had her back in Scotland she was gonna make sure Missy knew this!

"Look there isn't no first or second like a game! I love both of them they are both important to me at different stages of my life just coz I loved Alice first means nothing!"

"I don't wanna know Danny!" Shauna said angrily.

"I'm happy she has you in her corner." he told her trying to mend fences.

"I'll always fight for her. Like she would for me too. I expected the same of you too coz you she'd fight to death for you!"

"I do fight for her!"

"They are trying to turn her into a brain dead idiot Danny and you are letting them!" she seethed in a low deadly voice.

"No Shauna they are going to make her better!"

"She's been in there 3 days and when I saw her she looked worse than she did at home. She wasn't recognisable as Melissa anymore. We have seen each other at our best and worse and she looked the worst I have ever seen her in the whole time I have known her!" Shauna exhaled a breath to release the emotion that lodged in her chest.

He exhaled too. "Actually wait a minute." he said as he realised something. "Why am I even arguing with you? Your going home. Leaving. You don't care about her!"

Danny had just said the wrong thing. Shauna looked like she was gonna kill him. "Don't dare say I don't care about my best friend. You have no idea the lengths I'm ready to go to for her!" she was stood face to face with him fists clenched. She was risking jail to get Missy out of there. More than he was doing! She stepped back and took deep breaths trying desperately to calm herself.

"Well you are walking away aren't you?"

Her brown eyes flashed fire. They were narrowed on him. He saw her face calm - just.

"Like I said Danny go jump off a cliff." she walked back to her case and zipped it up. Then shoved passed him.

Lexi was walking in the house making noises at Ryan in his seat. Shauna walked passed her with her suitcase trailing.

"Shauna?" Lexi asked.

"I'm off home Lex." she lied.

"O, How is Miss?"

"Ask your dad." Shauna said. "I'll see you Lex. Love you. I'll call you ok."

"But Shauna…."

"I can't stay Lex. It isn't you or the kids. Me and your dad have had a disagreement and can't stand the sight of each other!"

Shauna then left the house quickly. She just hoped that Lexi hadn't noticed 2 passports in her hand!

(X)

Missy lay in her hospital bed. Losing the will to live. She didn't wanna live like this! She was so depressed why did people come see her if they always left her here. Couldn't they see what this place was doing her. It was destroying her soul. Her mind and her sense of humour. She couldn't remember how to smile never mind actually doing it. Why were they doing this to her? She had did nothing to them? Was a requirement of working in a psychiatric ward that you had to be insane too? It seemed so!

She began to ponder on all the ways that you could kill yourself. Well there are the obvious guns, knives. A hard hit on the head with a blunt instrument. And then there was pills, starvation. Dehydration. Jumping off a bridge. Throw yourself in front a car lorry. Jumping off a building. Drowning, burning to death. Wow there was quite a lot now that she thought about it. She had always wanted to go in her sleep. Quiet and peaceful. But now that she was like this no way. She wanted to go down swinging. Go out with a bang, not a whimper. God if she had to put up with this much longer she was gonna find a way to kill herself she was sick of her life!

'_Don't you dare give up Melissa Lynch!' Alice yelled in her head._

'Shut up Alice!' Great she was hearing voices in her head again. Usually it's so quiet in there.

"_I'm warning you Miss. If I see you up here I'll kick your ass!'_

'Alice death is preferable to this. I can't live like this much longer, my sanity is at stake!'

'_Your sanity was always questionable. Do you think anyone will notice?'_

'Alice I'm not joking I can feel it slipping away!'

'_What about the kids? Danny?'_

'They aren't the ones locked in here feeling like a pin cushion with all the needles they keep giving me! Alice I'm going out of my mind! If I don't die I will be insane and they'll have a legitimate reason to keep me here and I can't let that happen. Plus the amount of drugs these bastard keep giving me can't be doing my liver much good!'

'_Toughen up Miss. I'm seriously disappointed in you. I had no choice when I died and now your thinking about killing yourself!' Alice said in disgust._

'If your gonna be nasty to me then you can just get outta my head. I didn't exactly invite you!'

'_Fine QUITTER!'_

'Idiot'

'_Freak!'_

'Bigger freak!'

'_Biggest freak in the history of forever!'_

Missy exhaled in exasperation. She had just had a childish argument with her best friend in her head. God she IS insane no wonder they had her in here! They used to argue like that went they were about 8 years old!

'_I miss you too. Stay strong. You'll get outta there!' Alice reassured her._

'I really hope so Alice.'

She heard squeaky shoes down the hallway. No doubt Clive coming to dope her up. It seemed he was the one who had to give her, her meds. He hadn't been happy about his nose. Or his family jewels he had told her they were recovered enough to show her a good time tonight. Actually it had sounded more like a warning! she thought. Like hell! She'd die first! Then again what could she do? She couldn't talk. Couldn't move. Couldn't even lift her head off the pillow! No way of yelling for help or even trying to fight him off! She was given muscle relaxants. God if her arms and legs felt any softer they'd have the consistency of liquid.

The man in question popped his head in her room.

"Hey baby you in bed waiting?" he walked in chuckling menacingly. Pulled her straps made sure they were tight. "You kinky huh? Like to be tied up? Don't worry I won't keep you waiting long. I'll be back soon. Make it better for you - the anticipation" Put his face closer to hers. Missy felt bile rise. "We'll have fun I promise you that!"

He smiled a superior smile that made Missy wanna rip his face off. He walked out and she started to panic.

"Oh god she was all alone in here! He was gonna come and get her and there was nothing she could do! Why did this always happen to her? First Andy did it. Then Tapas threatened her and now Clive. She was breathing heavily almost hyperventilating. Clive could do it for as long as he wanted and no one would believe her. Blame it on her delusions. God she was gonna get ra…she could finish the word. It wouldn't come to that surely. Well was someone gonna come storming in and save her. Unlikely! She knew that Danny wasn't willing to help her and would curb Shauna's fight or flight tendencies. God she was trapped!

2 hours later Clive walked in. Acid pooled in her stomach.

"Everyone is on their break baby. We are all alone so you can be as loud as you want!"

He smiled at her showing his teeth, it looked like a snarl! God she was in deep trouble here and terrified outta her mind!

(X)

Shauna stood outside the hospital. "C'mon Eth, Thabo where are you?" she hissed huddled in the shadows. Her blond hair covered by a black hat. She was in black leggings. A black jumper and had put black trainers's on. She saw them walk around the corner. She motioned them into the shadows.

"Right we need to get in and out as clean as possible." Ethan said softly so his voice didn't carry. The night was silent.

"Right Eth, Thabo if possible I don't want you two anywhere near the building and at the first sign of trouble I want you both outta there! You both have to live here and if they get an image of you your screwed. I'm heading back to Scotland tonight."

"I live a fair way away so it doesn't really matter to me either." Thabo mentioned.

Shauna nodded. "So Eth you be careful ok!"

He nodded seriously.

"I looked around the building this afternoon. Inside and out. There are bars on all of the windows. Except I'm guessing the staff room. But that is no help to us! The only way in is thought the front door!"

She smiled and jangled some keys.

"How?" Both Ethan and Thabo asked.

"Filched them off an asshole male nurse earlier on so I can get around. There are gates and locked doors. I'm guessing he hasn't reported them missing or the police would have been in touch by now. The only problem we have now boys is Mr security guard!"

"Shit!" they chorused.

They stood in silence trying to think of a plan. Ethan spoke up. "Right Shauna you get in position at the side of the building. Me and Thabo are gonna create a diversion. When you get your chance run as fast as you can!"

Shauna nodded.

"Thabo come for a little walk with me yeah."

When Shauna was out of earshot Thabo asked. "So what we gonna do? Jump him? We'd take him easily."

"Nope." Ethan said simply. "Walk on ahead of me then stop walking in front of the doors. Turn back and look at me!"

Thabo did as Ethan asked. He walked along slowly looking at the floor. Stopped at the doors. There was a long path but the path was well lit. The guard looked bored.

"Hey! I'm, gonna get you!" Ethan yelled angrily, ran up to him. "I'm sorry Thabo!" Ethan declared and before Thabo could decipher his meaning Ethan punched him hard in the face. Thabo slid to the ground holding his face.

"HEY!" the guard yelled. Ethan ran for it. Sprinted away as fast as he could.

The guard ran to check on Thabo who was pretending to be out cold on the ground. Ethan was gonna get it for this! He thought.

(X)

Shauna was hiding in her spot. Holding her breath.

'_I got your back mate.' she heard Alice in her head._

"I know you're here in spirit!" Shauna replied softly.

Shauna stood watching Ethan and Thabo. She saw Thabo walk, stop and then look back. Ethan then yelled something and then… what the hell? He just punched Thabo! Thabo slid to the floor.

What is he doing? Was her first thought she went to run to them and ask if Ethan had lost his mind! And to make sure Thabo was ok! She stopped herself as the security guard yelled HEY! And approached Thabo. Ethan ran off. She smiled just about to head to the door when a hard hand clamped her shoulder.

**A/N OH NO! Shauna's escape plan has been foiled and Missy is in there alone getting attacked! Is this the catalyst which sends Missy right over the edge?**


	63. D12 Break out

Shauna froze at the hand on her shoulder. Her heart stopped. She spun around. Saw Lexi all dressed in black.

"Dammit Lexi!" she hissed hand over her heart. Felt it pounding through her clothes. "I thought you were another guard! For Gods sake!" she exhaled a shaky breath.

"I'm here to help Miss!" she said and gestured to her black clothes even her golden blond hair was streaked with black shoe polish. "Liv's idea." she said and fingered a strand of her hair. "Wanted to kill her personally!"

"NO Lexi I gotta go and no you can't be involved. This is kidnapping you could get sent down if we're caught!"

Lexi dashed to the door.

"Just like her freaking mother!" Shauna muttered running after her.

Shauna reached the doors a second after Lexi. Let them in quickly with the keys.

"Right Lexi." Shauna whispered "We're in. We gotta be real quiet ok cover your face coz there's camera's in here."

Lexi pulled her hood up and rearranged her hair so it shielded her face.

"Good. You try not to talk if you have to disguise your voice!" Shauna whispered.

They dropped to their knees. Saw the guard take his position back at the doors.

'Ready?' Shauna mouthed.

Lexi nodded stiffly and gave her a thumbs up in the darkness.

'We move quickly and quietly!' she mouthed urgently.

Lexi nodded again.

Shauna motioned to follow with her hand. They move stealthily on their knees till they were out of the guard's line of vision. Then they got on their feet and walked silently through the hospital. They opened gates and doors. Not noticing any nurses on duty at all.

"This is weird." Shauna whispered.

Lexi nodded.

'We close?' Lexi mouthed.

"Nearly!"

They soon arrived at Missy's room and were surprised to find the door unlocked.

"This can't be good!" Shauna murmured.

The door creaked open and they saw Clive above Missy. An empty needle lay on the bedside table. Missy's eyes were closed tightly. Disgust, pain and inevitability all written clear on her face. Lexi roared in anger.

"What are you doing?" she screamed ran and dragged him off Missy. Pulled him by the back of his shirt. He fell backwards off the bed. Lexi went to hit him but he caught her fist and flipped her so she was on the ground below him. He raised a tight fist. Lexi fought him. He went to smash his fist in Lexi's face when Shauna wrapped her arms around his throat from behind. He was on his feet shaking her all over but she held tightly. He grew weaker and fell to his knees.

Lexi was busy unstrapping Missy.

Lexi then pulled Shauna off him. "We need to go!" she whispered.

"I know you." Clive pointed to Shauna still gasping on his knees. "I'll have you done for this!"

"_Shauna you can't leave me here. Just ignore what he says and get me outta here!" Missy pleaded silently._

Shauna had a idea, "So will you! If we don't get outta here I'll tell the world what you tried to do to her. There's 3 of us against one of you!"

'_She's got you there Clive you sick prick!'_

"They'll never believe you!" Clive countered.

"They will as soon as she is better. She'll have no reason to lie then and the investigation alone will be damaging to this hospital. Your boss will be pissed! It makes me wonder how many other patients have you done this to? Tell them you weren't here. You found her bed empty. Or even say we throttled you and knocked you out!"

Clive glared angrily.

Lexi was beside Missy pulling her to sitting. She was flopping backwards. "She's out of it S…" she nearly said her name but stopped herself. Clive's ears were pricked.

Shauna frowned. "Lift her on my back. It'll be to hard and time consuming if we both carry her."

Clive glared at them. Lexi smiled victoriously. "Your lucky your still alive!" she hissed.

"Come and try it kid! I might give you a piece of the action!" Lexi lunged for him. Shauna caught her.

"Calm down!"

'_Calm down Lex. He's provoking you! Ignore him. And if so much as hinted at touching her again as soon as she was better he was gonna die. Slowly and painfully.'_

Lexi exhaled an angry breath. Lifted Missy and put her in the piggy back position on Shauna's back Shauna leaned forward so Missy leaned across her back and grabbed her legs. Lexi rearranged her hair. She so longed to give Clive a slap!

"Christ Miss you could lose a few pounds!" Shauna heaved. "Right you unlock." Shauna passed Lexi the keys as they locked Clive in Missy's bedroom. "We'll head to the back fire exit. I have a car parked!"

They moved quickly down the corridors when a siren split the air a red light flashed above Missy's door.

"Panic….button." Missy said weakly. Heavily slurred.

"Don't worry mate. Trust me." Shauna told her. They heard Missy exhale worriedly.

'_Don't worry? God this is so not good! Missy thought panicked. I'm putting my escape in the hands who is daft enough to try to break me out in the first place! We're all doomed._

"Head to the stairs. We need to keep outta sight!" Shauna said quickly.

They heard footsteps. Ducked into a cleaning cupboard held their breath.

"LYNCH again! She's more trouble then she's worth! The money we earn isn't enough it would be best to get rid!" a nurse said angrily.

"Yeah I might slip her few extra pills!" another replied.

'_Try it bitch! You'll find yourself wearing them!" Missy hissed in her head._

Shaun put her hand on Lexi's arm as she saw her again lunge for the door angrily. She shook her head. Lexi crossed her arms angrily.

All was quiet once again except for the alarm.

"We're never gonna get out of here." Shauna murmured losing faith.

'_Don't worry trust me.' Missy thought morosely. Then stopped herself. She was extremely grateful they had tried to get her out. If she could talk she'd tell them to leave her here and get the hell outta here!_

Lexi looked around and smiled. Nodded in appreciation. "Ethan is gonna kill me!" she muttered. "You get moving with Miss. I'm right behind you!"

Lexi spilt some flammable liquids on the floor. Dropped a lit match onto them. They caught quickly. Closed the door and ran and caught up to Shauna. A fire alarm rang loudly

"What the hell you done?" Shauna asked panicked.

"Set a little fire. Don't worry it'll go out quick enough. Just to distract everyone from Missy!"

"Dammit Lex we are heading towards the fire exit!" Shauna said angrily.

"Not the same one they will be heading to. I was taught in here for a bit in my paramedics course. The one I'm sure your going to is the one for the classroom. It's night. They are empty!"

"Lex you a genius!" Shauna said heaving Missy.

'_Clever kid.' Missy thought in appreciation._

"Hey I'm my mothers daughter!" she said cockily.

'_You sure are kid!" Missy thought. It was just like having Alice here with them. She could think on her feet just like Lex was doing right now!_

_(X)_

They moved quickly not bothered about making a noise as it was masked by the wails of the alarms. Missy was out of it. Hung onto Shauna limply. They pushed the fire door. It didn't budge.

"It's locked!" Lexi said panicked.

'_Kick it in!' Missy thought._

Shauna settled Miss on the floor. "Two minutes mate."

'_I sure ain't going anywhere!'_

Shauna and Lex were hitting the doors alternately with their shoulders.

"Right on the count of 3 we go together!" Lexi said. "One"

"Two." Shauna replied.

"Three!" They chorused together and they hit the door. It groaned and fell. They both fell to the floor outside.

Shauna was back inside in an instant. Put Missy's arm around her shoulder.

"Didn't I tell you we'd get you out Miss!" Shauna said overjoyed. "Bet you doubted me. O ye of little faith!"

'_Can you blame me. You couldn't even hide Alice from your mum!'_

"DAMMIT!" Lexi shouted. Ran back inside.

'_Lex what the hell are you doing?' Missy screamed angrily._

"LEX!" Shauna yelled. "What on earth is going through that kids head?" she lain Missy in the back of the car. Threw a blanket so she was fully covered. "Stay still Miss!" the locked the car door.

'_Like I could do anything else!' Missy thought dryly. 'Just get yourselves outta there safe Shay!'_

Shauna was running thought the hospital. She had no idea where Lex had went. Oh God what was she thinking they were out! She saw Lexi leaving a room marked infirmary.

"Here's the drugs she needs. The anti psychotic ones. They were in her notes. Let's get outta here!"

Clive appeared behind Shauna.

"Move!" Lexi screamed.

She didn't move quick enough. He had Shauna's hair Shauna lifted her hands and batted behind her. She was wincing. His put his arm around Shauna's neck and held her tightly. Shauna pulled at his arms but his grip was like steel.

"Tell me where she is!" he hissed.

"Why don't you try and make me!" Shauna goaded. He tightened his grip "Sunshine take Miss to Eee Bear. They will take care of her!" Shauna croaked. "Keep her away from Dee Tee though!"

"No I can't leave you!" and why the hell was Shauna telling her to keep miss away from her dad?

"GO!" She shouted. Clive tightened the pressure further.

Shauna's face was going blue. Her arms fighting less.

"Tell me or I snap her neck!" he warned.

"We hid her in a room." showed him the keys. "Let her go and I'll show you the key and the type of room."

"How can I trust you?"

"If the type of room is right and the key I must have been in there, why else but to stash her in there? Just let her go!" she said.

"No!"

Shauna was going limp.

"Cleaning cupboard next to the back fire exit. We came back for her meds. She slowed us down!" Lexi finally said.

Clive threw Shauna on the floor and ran to where she said. Shaun was on the floor gasping for breath. Lexi picked her up.

"We can't head that way." Shauna gasped "He'll catch us on the way out."

"Staff room!" they chorused together.

Made it there in no time. Smashed the window. Shauna frowned at Lexi as she did it.

"Kidnapping. Arson. Why not add criminal damage huh?" Lexi said dryly.

Shauna shook her head and climbed out.

"I'm warning you Lexi it's quite a drop!" Shauna said and let go. Landed with a thud. Lexi landed a second after her.

They ran to the car climbed in Shauna in the front and Lexi at the back. They sped away.

(X)

Shauna drove quickly. Getting away from the hospital as quick as possible. Right she'd drop Lex off at home and take Miss to a motel to recover. There was no way she'd get her on a aeroplane in this state anyway and it would only draw attention to them. She'd let her sleep it off and if she wasn't better by tomorrow she'd deal with it then!

Lexi sat in theback and was stroking Missy's hair. She had her eyes closed. "Your gonna be ok now Miss." she looked up at Shauna who was concentrating hard.

"Dad told me what they did to her. I knew you wouldn't stand for it. I knew mum wouldn't either. I knew you'd plot a break out. It's what mum would have done!"

"You are your mothers daughter Lex. In every way!" she murmured. "With you there it felt like your mum was behind me. Keeping me from cracking up. Keeping me calm like she always did. It felt good in a way."

"We're gonna have to hide her." lexi mentioned.

"I have that covered." Shauna said.

"Shauna what did you mean in the hopsital, keep her away from my dad? He loves her!"

"He was gonna leave her to rot in there Lex. We didn't go through all that just for her to go straight back in there!"

"But he wouldn't!"

"Wouldn't he Lex? You saw Clive in there! Did your dad make any move to get her out of there? NO he didn't! No way is she going back in there I won't allow it!"

Lexi nodded. "I'll keep my mouth shut but you know what he is like. He'll know I had something to do with it. He isn't stupid."

"Yes he is lex. He's stupid enough to get her sectioned in the first place!" and he was stupid enough to lose ther best thing that ever happened to him coz Miss wasn't coming back! "Damn the car is low on petrol. We should make it to Leopards Den. I'm gonna hide her in a hut for tonight!" she lied.

"Miss can you hear me?" Lexi asked softly.

She was quiet.

"I am glad you were there lex. Like I said it sorta felt like a final mission with your mum."

"Yeah I could imagine now what you were like now when you were younger. I could so see you freeing each other from detentions and stuff!"

"Now that was hard! This was kid stuff compared to that!" Shauna laughed. "Liberating Alice from the dreaded science detention. Remind me to tell you one time."

"Mum felt close when we were doing that. You know like she was watching over us. Making sure we got out ok!"

Shauna nodded. "Yeah your mum would have done that."

"Do you think Clive will tell anyone about us?"

"No I don't think he will. He was back in there looking for us. He's no doubt abused other patients too. He knew we weren't bluffing and he didn't want her to get out coz when she's better he knows she'll tell everyone. He'll regret the day he messed with Miss!"

Shauna made the car jerk a little then stop by the Leopards Den sign. Lexi climbed out. Reached in to take Miss out. Shauna fiddled with her door.

"Hey Lex give me a hand huh? This door is sticky!" Shauna asked.

Lex closed the door so Miss didn't fall out and walked around the back to help Shauna. Shauna locked the doors and started the car.

"Shauna?"Lexi pulled at the locked door.

"Goodbye Lex. If they find her they'll send her back that can't happen! I'm gonna take her where they can't find her. And no it isn't Glasgow!"

The car roared to life and gravel spewed as it sped away leaving Lexi staring in it's wake.

**A/N anyone get the feeling that maybe lex is taking over alice's place in the trio of friends? hope u enjoyed. miss is out of the hospital bt will be able to get her out of africa? and will danny find out? keep reading! x**


	64. D13 Dreams

Danny was asleep in bed. Dreaming. His breathing slow and deep. Alice was alive and they were together. It was the last surgery they had ever performed together actually. He and Missy were still oblivious to their feelings for each other. He and Alice were drying their hands after a surgery.

"Well Mr Trevanion I do believe we are finished for today! And it couldn't come quick enough! We have been ran off our feet today!"

He smiled. "We aren't!" he murmured. He enclosed her in his arms.

"Really? What else could we possibly do in here?" she asked playfully.

He pressed soft kisses to her lips. "I know one or two things." he whispered seductively.

She took his hand led him to the office and closed the door behind them. He kissed her deeply her arms twined around his neck pulling him closer. He pulled away from her and walked around to go in his drawer.

"Good thinking in case this goes too far!" she said breathlessly thinking he was going for protection.

He put a white box on the table and took the lid off. "Right boot or car!" he said grinning.

"What? You kiss me so hot that I almost melted in a puddle at your feet and you break out the monopoly board?"

"Hey it's a favourite past time of ours!" he told her.

"I know another one!" she retorted.

He grinned.

"I'm warning you Danny if you don't touch me right now I'll go insane!"

"Poor baby!" he said happily.

She stormed from the office. He frowned and followed her. "Hey Alice I was…."

He opened the door but instead of his surgery he was in Missy's hospital room only it wasn't Missy on the bed it was Alice.

"Alice oh God!" he yelled. "Why the hell is she in here. I demand you get her out now! Alice I swear I'm gonna sort this!" he vowed.

Shauna was in the room. "You did this to them!" she hissed.

"Them?" he asked.

Shauna clicked her fingers and another bed appeared. Missy was lay on that one. He ran to her. "Look I'll sort this for you too!"

"You can't!" a doctor walked in. "Only one!"

He frowned.

"One can stay and one can go!" The doctor told him simply.

"But I love them both!" he cried.

"Choose Mr Trevanion!"

Suddenly everyone was chanting choose at him.

'Choose choose choose choose!"

"ok, ok I choose….Alice!"

"Good choice" the doctor murmured. "That one isn't worth saving!"

"Don't talk about my friend in that manner!" Alice hissed as the doctor loosened her straps.

Alice was released. She looked at Danny. Shook her head sadly. "You made the wrong choice Danny." she sat up.

He frowned. "What?"

"You forgot something. I'm dead!"

Alice disappeared in a puff of smoke as he reached for her. He was pushed from Missy's room, the door was locked bolted and chained.

He shot up in bed.

"So your finally awake then?" a Glaswegian voice asked.

(X)

Danny turned at the sound of the voice. Was shocked as he was looking at long straight black hair. Eyes as blue as the African sky and a wide smile he always felt like he wanted to fall into and never climb back out.

"Alice?" he asked breathlessly.

She lifted her arms. "The one and only!"

"I'm dreaming!" he muttered.

Alice tutted. "Of course your still dreaming daftie! God I'm obviously not real!" she rolled her eyes.

"Have you come to depart wisdom? Like a good little angel?"

"For your information I am a devils minion and loving it!" she grinned. "Nope no wisdom I just came to do this!" she walked over to the bed picked up a pillow and hit him square in the face with it. He fell back in shock. She stood over him and continued hitting him.

"How. Dare. You. Pick. Me. Over. Missy!" she said hitting him after every word to punctuate the statement

She then exhaled a short breath. Nodded in acknowledgement of his shocked face and dropped the pillow to the floor. Went to sit on a chair by the crib.

"What?" he asked confused.

"See Ry, daddy just doesn't get it! Do I need to use a brick? - Probably!"

"You saw my dream?" he asked.

"Yes." she said dryly crossed her arms.

"And?" he asked.

"How could you pick me over Missy?"

He sat up uncomfortable.

"It's like picking death over life coz I'm gone Danny. I have been for two years!"

"So I'm just supposed to forget you and our life together?" he asked angrily.

"You better freaking not!" she retorted.

He grinned.

"But Danny you aren't mine anymore!"

"Yes I am." he told her.

"No your not. Your Melissa's. She deserves all of you, like I had. Not three quarters where you leave the last part for me."

"Have I really been doing that?" he asked.

She nodded. He crossed his legs.

"She's just so hard to love sometimes. Like if she gets in one of her moods you can't go near her. Or if she's feeling playful and starts playing tricks on people. She scared the life outta Caroline, head in the box joked and then roared at her. Except that sorta backfired coz Caroline hit her with her purse. And when visitors came she put cling film over the toilet seat she's 40 years old!" he said exasperated.

Alice laughed. "I'll think you find the cling film joke was Daniel although she did put him up to it!"

He shook his head. "Just another day in the madhouse." he muttered.

"Danny I think you'll find the hardest ones to love are the ones who need it the most!"

He exhaled. "We were so easy."

"She's worth it Danny."

"Maybe. I'm not so sure."

"HEY! That is my best friend you are dissing. Do I have to kick your ass? I've been doing Tae Kwon Alice in heaven!"

"Tae Kwon Alice?" he asked.

"I just make it up as I go along." Moved her arms in a rhythmic circle. Kicked her feet a little.

"Oh Alice I miss this!"

"Don't. Make moments like this with missy!"

He nodded. "I kinda forgot what I love about her though. Everything has been so hard since Ryan was born."

"When she's better it'll all go back to normal. We went through patches like this!"

He nodded again.

"Right that brings me to the second reason I'm here. I need my pillow again!"

"No way!" he said playfully.

"Fine I shall use Plan B!"

He looked worried. She jumped on the side of the bed he feel back with a yelp. She grabbed his head and hit it off the mattress.

"How could you let my best friend go insane Daniel? She fumed. "Then leave her to freaking rot?" she paced angrily.

"She needs help Alice. God I had this exact same conversation with Shauna!"

"Too right she needs help. She needs her family! You, Daniel Amie and most importantly Ryan! He is the reason she went loopy being away from him won't help her!"

"She was gonna hurt him Alice!"

"NO SHE WASN'T DANNY! Why do you think she snapped?"

"Coz she's insane?" he retorted.

"Don't talk that way about Miss Danny. Don't!" Alice said coldly.

"Sorry old joke."

"She snapped coz she was being told to hurt him and knew she couldn't!"

"What so I just go and sign her out?" he asked.

"I dunno I'm lost. Go see her doctor or something. Could be too late for that anyway!"

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"You do know that Shauna is gonna go off half cocked."

"What can Shauna do?" he scoffed.

"You shouldn't underestimate her Danny. She'll be your downfall."

He nodded.

"Just get her out of there. I'd say do it for me but you should really do it for her, coz you love her."

"You right." he told her.

"Was there any doubt? And for my final reason for my visit. I just had to see him!" she gushed. She looked in the crib at the sleeping baby. "Aww look at him, he is so gorgeous. I always knew Missy would have stunning kids!"

"He has her eyes too. He was born with mine though. He stood beside her next to the crib.

"He defo has the look of you though." she remarked. "Poor kid!" she added playfully.

He went to nudge her but she moved and shook her head in warning. He nodded realising.

"So what, I'm not good enough for you now your dead?"

She looked at him like he was stupid. "You should see some of the angels up there….whoo!" she fan herself with her handing. Nodding appreciatively.

He stuck his tongue out. She grinned. It slowly faded.

"What on earth….Dammit Shauna Don't!" she winced. "Shauna you freaking idiot and how could you involve Lexi? The three of you get outta there right now!" Alice was yelling

"What?" he asked.

"My worst fears confirmed. Shauna went off half cocked." she neglected to mention Ethan's and Lexi's involvement. Although she mentioned Lexi earlier so he no doubt knew.

"Oh God what has she done?" he asked.

"Be right back!"

Alice disappeared then appeared again.

Danny's jaw was hung open as she returned. "That was mint, do it again!" he asked excitedly.

She rolled her eyes. "Look I'm gonna have to say goodbye to you." She blew him a kiss. "Give Ryan kisses from his Auntie Alice and take care of Miss for me. Your gonna wake up in 5,4,3,2"

Danny was awoke by the shrill ringing of a telephone.

**A/N this wasn't supposed to be this long but as usual my overactive imagination took over. I swear I think It's working overtime with this story tho. lol. i like Alice. she is making danny wake up to his feelings ect...**


	65. D14 Care

"Oh c'mon Miss!" Shauna heaved. She was flopping as Shauna tried to drag her to their hotel room.

"You being funny Miss? Course you are it's you!" she continued flopping forward.

"I swear…" Shauna grunted with exertion. "If I ever get my hands on the pricks who did this to you then I'll murder then with my bare hands. I'll pin them down with a nail gun and just….. Hurt them bad!" she vowed.

Withdrew the key for their room from her pocket. Unlocked it. Pulled her inside and lay her down.

"God knows how long those drugs are gonna take to wear off!"

Missy lay prone of the bed.

"O I am loving this convo Miss. So scintillating. You mind if I go shower?"

Missy didn't answer.

"Nope? Fantastic!"

Shauna took her time in the shower playing a what if game in her head.

"What is Missy is awake when I go back in there what should I say?"

"What is she isn't back to normal tomorrow what do I do?"

She so hadn't thought this through! The only thought that had dominated her thoughts had been to get her friend out of that hell hole at all costs! Nothing else had mattered. She wrapped a towel around herself. It was coarse and chafed her sensitive skin. Se pulled on shirts and a t-shirt walked into the room.

"Next time I kidnap you I'm gonna make sure I take a soft towel too. Felt like I was drying myself with sandpaper! Look at it, it's almost threadbare!" she held it up and it was almost see through.

Missy hadn't moved. Her eyes closed. Her breathing slow and deep.

"It's best you sleep anyway." she pushed the hair out of Missy's eyes. Love for her friend filled her, along with relief that she was safe too. "I'll take care of you Miss."

She brushed her hair. Saw red marks where Clive had choked her. Best wear a halter neck or a scarf on the plane. She'd look daft but it was bad enough having to take Miss on a plane in her drug fuelled haze. They needed to be as inconspicuous as possible.

She sat on a chair with yesterdays newspaper. All was quiet. Shauna fell asleep. Was awoke by Missy's panicked shouts.

"Get away from them!" Missy yelled.

Shauna sat up sharply. Jerked awake checked her watch. 4 o'clock she yawned.

"Alice…Shauna…NO!" Missy was fighting on the bed.

Shauna got a cold flannel sat beside her and dabbed her head. "Miss it's Shay your ok." she said softly. Her arms stop flailing. Her eyes opened a crack. "Where am I?"

"We're going home to Glasgow soon." Shauna promised. "Just sleep I'm taking care of you now!"

"Thanks for taking care of me Shauna." she said with a weary yawn. "Tell Alice thank you too." she murmured then quieted.

What Shauna didn't know and couldn't see was that Alice was sat beside Missy on the bed holding her hand.

Shauna stared at her friend sadly. "I should have known you'd be here for her too." Shauna whispered.

(X)

Missy didn't awake again. It was 7 am. Shauna hadn't went back to sleep. She had been deep in thought planning.

"Ok Miss moment of truth!" Shauna went to the bed where Missy lay still. "Miss." she whispered. Didn't want to jolt her.

"Missy!" She said slightly louder.

Nothing.

Right time for the big guns! "Melissa!" she said voice raised.

Her eyes fluttered, but still remained closed.

"I forgot how hard it was to wake you up! Do I need to have a coffee IV inserted?" Shauna asked.

"Probs. I wouldn't say no the way I'm feeling!" Came a husky reply. "God how much did I have to drink last night. I have got to be hung over with a headache like this! I swear I am NEVER drinking again! I never drink how could you let me get into this state. You and Alice are so dead!"

"Miss you ok?" Shauna asked. Alice? She wondered.

"My head feels like it has been stuffed with rocks and a man with a sledgehammer is in there breaking them into little pieces!" she groaned, mouth dry. "My thoughts are all jumbled too. I had the craziest dream!"

"Tell me about it."

Missy opened her eyes. "You broke me out of hospital."

Shauna grinned and did a victory dance.

Missy looked at her stunned. "You mean that wasn't a dream? O God you so didn't break me outta hospital!" she muttered putting her hand on her head.

"Course I did. Admit it Miss I'm a legend! Your hero!"

"O yeah you'll be a legend." she paused "In prison! Your gonna end up in a cell with a big butch woman with the nickname large Marge. You are SO gonna be her bitch!"

Shauna chuckled.

"I'm glad you think this is funny coz I ain't joking mate!" Missy told her seriously.

"O lighten up! You're here with me aren't you?" Shauna grumbled.

"Yeah, thanks Shay. Ignore my ramblings before. You remember what I'm like when I first wake up?"

Shauna nodded, "O yeah. You'd swear you had 6 arms 4 legs and was from Mars. Can you stand?"

Missy sat up. Shrugged her shoulders. "I have no idea!"

Shauna offered Missy her hand who grasped it. Pulled her to standing. Steadied her then let her go.

"They still work then." Missy said looking down.

"It's nice to see you standing."

"Where's Danny?" Missy asked.

Shauna made a face. "He doesn't deserve you Miss. He had you sectioned remember. And he left it to me to get you out of there. He left you to rot!"

Missy looked at Shauna worriedly. "I hear the voices again Shauna. Very faintly."

"Don't worry Miss I have the pills you need. When we get settled back in Scotland we'll get you a doctors and stuff sorted."

"Scotland? Why would I go back there?"

"What's keeping you here Miss?"

"Well as soon as I'm better I'm sure Ryan will need me. And there's Danny and the kids. I have a life here!"

"Danny had you sectioned Miss. Sectioned! Is that the actions of someone who loves you?"

"What about Ryan?"

"When your better come and get him and I'll help you bring him up."

"I couldn't take him away from his dad Shauna."

"Ryan could come and see him a couple of times a year."

Missy was frowning.

"Just take your pills, we can work all the small stuff later."

"I'm staying Shay."

"Miss if you stay and they catch you here then they'll throw you back in there. Do you want that?"

Missy exhaled.

"He didn't care enough to get you out of there!"

"Shauna!" Missy warned.

Shauna held up her hands in a gesture of surrender.

"I'll agree to go with you but as soon as I feel like I'm better then I'm coming back!" Missy warned.

Shauna smiled. That would at least give her time to get Danny out of her head! She turned on the TV.

"Oh Shauna you have problems mate!" Missy declared.

A picture of Shauna suddenly filled the TV.

A female reporter was speaking. "If you see this woman please telephone the police immediately. She is wanted for the kidnapping of a woman from a secure facility. She is not believed to be dangerous or armed but the police are urging people not to approach her as she may be mentally unstable!"

"Mentally unstable?" she squeaked. "I'll show them mentally un-freaking-stable!"

Missy chuckled.

"Did you see the picture they used of me?" Shauna asked in disgust. "God! Off grainy CCTV! I look so bad, I look manly. God people are gonna think I'm a man!"

"Isn't that a good thing? Shauna the cops are after you and your worrying about the picture they showed of you. Since when did you turn into me?"

"That's how I know you aren't back to your funny silly completely daft self. You'd be loving this!" Shauna told her grinning.

"Just gimmie some clothes yeah?"

Shauna tossed her some of Danny's tracksuit bottoms and a jumper. "I borrowed them. He can have them back." she said dryly. "We, that is you needs a disguise." she tossed her a cap and sunglasses. "Put them on too!"

Missy bunched her up and put the cap on her head. "Not a word Shauna!" Missy said and looked in the mirror.

"Miss I'm sorry but I gotta say you make a good looking man!" Shauna couldn't hold back.

"Fuck off Shauna!"

"Right I christen thee Matthew. C'mon Matty!"

There was a loud pounding on the door.

"You paid them for the room right?" Missy asked.

"Course I did!" Shauna hissed.

The pounding continued.

"C'mon lets move it!" Shauna suggested.

They climbed out of their bedroom window and ran to the car. Shauna started the car and they pulled away. "Eeeee this is so exciting!" Shauna declared as she drove.

"Whatever you say Shay!" Missy replied dryly.

**A/N ok so will they get pout of the country sorta like a filler chappie in this one. nothing much happened. more to come so keep reading :)**

**apologies for the lack of update my son spilled a can of lilt over the keyboard by the time arnie too it apart and dried it out i couldn't b bothered to type anyways hope u enjoyed x**


	66. D15 Worries

Danny picked up the phone. Mind fuzzy from sleep. He was still filled with Alice's words. What on earth had Shauna did now? That was even if he believed his dream which he wasn't sure if he did!

"Hello Daniel Trevanion." he answered with a yawn.

"Where are they Mr Trevanion?" a man hissed.

"Huh? Who, what?" he asked.

"Melissa Lynch!"

"She was in the hospital in the care of her doctor Dr Jellow."

"Well I don't have her. She was abducted just over 2 hours ago by 2 people. One who bears an uncanny resemblance to Shauna O Donell."

She so hadn't kidnapped Miss had she? "Shauna went home to Scotland yesterday afternoon."

"Not according to our CCTV. We'll have the police over to make a statement. She won't get away Mr Trevanion. I'll see her prosecuted for this!"

Danny exhaled as he disconnected. "Alice you weren't joking were you. Half cocked? God she kidnapped her. She has gone way too far this time!" he breathed in the silent bedroom.

(X)

Shauna and Missy sat in Jo'burg airport.

"Shit!" Shauna muttered looking over her paper. "Clive at 3 o'clock." she whispered.

Missy looked over.

"Don't look what if he recognises you."

"What in your fabulous disguise?" Missy asked sarcastically.

"No need to be sarky!"

"I need to know what he looks like. What if I look at him later and he recognises me?"

"Ugly and bald. Need I say more?"

"Oh yeah and how many people can that describe. C'mon Shay you could be describing yourself!"

"Hey I am not bald!" she hissed.

"What about ugly?" Missy asked smiling.

"Go to hell Miss. Take a toothbrush!"

Missy looked at the floor.

"Gimmie your credit card." Shauna had an idea.

"Why?" Missy asked suspiciously. She had only just got her credit cards back. Shauna had grabbed them from the house before she left. She finally had something of her own and was loath to let them go.

"I'm just gonna lead the police on a little wild goose chase. C'mon it'll be fun!"

"Can I have it back?" she asked softly.

"Ya daftie. They're yours course you can. You'd kick my ass if I tried to keep them from you anyway!"

Missy handed the card to her and Missy went to purchase two tickets to Newcastle airport. She grinned she was just too clever! It was beyond words! She went back to Missy leaned close.

"Look Miss Clive is lurking around. If we get separated or if he grabs me you just go and get on the plane ok! Go to my mum's I rang her this morning while you were asleep. She'll take care of you."

"What'd she say?" Missy asked.

"That she was gonna kill me for kidnapping you. I should have used more legal means to get you outta there. That I was in deep trouble and that I should have been sectioned not you coz obviously I'm not right in the head!"

An hour later their flight was called.

"Lets go Miss. Keep ya head down."

They walked towards departures. Clive spotted Shauna.

"HEY!" he yelled.

"Run for it Miss!" Shauna yelled. "Get on the plane ok. I'll make sure he don't get you!" Shauna pushed her forward "GO!"

Turned to Clive. "C'mon then fat boy!" She yelled sprinted off. But broke off away from Missy after a little bit. She weaved in and out of people ran faster and harder til she was sure she lost him. She grinned breathing heavily. Walked around a corner and was face to face with no other then Clive.

"Where's Melissa?" he hissed.

She turned to run but he dragged her into a quiet corner.

"Why do you care?" she asked.

He pounded her back off a wall. "You both made a fool out of me! You gotta pay!"

"I don't have her. I'm going home. She did a runner last night!"

"LIAR! You were both in a hotel room this morning."

"Eww you spied on us!"

"I know that her credit card was used to buy two tickets to Newcastle." he hissed.

"Really? I had no idea!"

He pounded her back again and she winced winded. "Where is she?"

"I really have no idea!"

He put his arm against her throat. "Tell me or I'll snap your neck!" he put more pressure on her windpipe. At least Miss was safe from this psycho. Suddenly there was a clang and Clive slumped to the floor. Missy stood holding a metal jug. It was badly dented now.

"Gift shop." she said and dropped it to the floor next to Clive.

"Oh God Miss. Thank you so much you came back for me!"

"You're my best friend Shay we look out for each other. I've always got your back."

They high fived.

"C'mon Miss we'll miss our flight!"

They hurried to board their plane.

(X)

Danny was in pieces in the living room. Ryan on the floor on his blue mat. Danny was holding two photographs. Missy was gone. Couldn't be found. Her passport was gone too she had bought two tickets to Newcastle. Newcastle? She had no connection to that area, as far as he new not that he new all that much about her. She was pretty private even to him! But still James had the connection there. Not Miss so why would she go there? He'd rang James earlier who had lied through his back teeth to him. Had told him that Shauna had arrived home a few hours earlier and was asleep in bed. That she would be pissed that they lost Missy. That completely contradicted the photo in his hands. It was undoubtedly Shauna in the picture. And the other woman. He recognised her too. It was hard not to. He looked at a similar face in the mirror each morning. His daughter Lexi. To say he was angry was an understatement. Lexi was involved in the kidnapping! He expected more of her. She was much more level headed. Like him! She could go to prison for this! Which was why he was keeping his mouth shut!

"Hey dad." Lexi said walking in.

He looked towards her angrily. Since she was here he'd confront her now.

"Look familiar Lex?" he asked holding up the picture as she walked into the living room.

If he hadn't known her he would have missed the panicked look that crossed her face.

"Who are they dad?"

"I think you know Lex! Missy had been kidnapped."

"Really? Have they found her?"

"Quit the act right now Alexis. I am so not in the mood!" he threw the picture at her. It fluttered to the floor before it reached her.

"I have no idea what your talking about dad."

"Why Lexi? Why help Shauna take her away from us?"

Lexi crossed her arms. He wasn't even bothered they saved her was he? She was pissed now! "You don't understand dad so stop right there!"

"Damn right I don't understand!"

"Clive was gonna rape her dad and she couldn't do a thing about it! We saved her in more ways then one. That's what YOU left her too. I went to help coz I KNOW mum would have been behind Shauna 110 percent coz she loved her best friend! You know she couldn't even stand. Shauna had to carry her out if I hadn't of been there it was unlikely they would have got out! She couldn't fight Clive off. She couldn't even scream!" Lexi said in disgust. "Not tell me that we should have left her there!"

Danny looked pained.

Lexi relented at her dad's face. "Look I have no doubt she will be back when she is better. She'll tell the police what went on and everything will be square. But even if she doesn't it's worth going down for dad!"

"I hope your sure Lex. Coz this is beyond me. I can't help you out of this one!"

Lexi shrugged angrily. "I didn't ask for your help. I'm an adult a grown woman unless it missed your notice!" She said defiantly.

"I'm gonna call Shauna later." he told her.

Lexi nodded. "Ask her if Miss is ok. She was well out of it!" then "We did the right thing dad."

"What by taking Ryan's mother away from him?"

"You started that by getting her sectioned. So she wasn't even here anyway! And I didn't know that Shauna was gonna do a runner with her!"

Danny nodded. Felt a little lost.

(X)

The next day he rang James.

"Is Shauna there mate and don't lie to me this time!"

"No Danny." James replied.

"I asked you not to lie to me." Danny said coldly.

"I swear Danny she ain't here. On my kids lives. She popped in grabbed some of her stuff warned me the police would be around kissed the girls and then left. I rang her mum. She has no idea where she is either."

Danny exhaled. "I'm worried about them James. They're both as bad as each other. They'll just egg each other on!"

"I agree. She explained to me about Missy. She's not the most careful of people at the best of times"

"We just gotta hope they keep their heads down until the dust settles!" Danny said.

"I think that is the best we can hope for Dan. I gotta say Shauna has surpassed even herself this time! I mean KIDNAPPING her best friend is going abit far even for her! The girls seen it on the news and think she's a hero!"

"You just gotta make sure they know what she did was wrong!" Danny suggested.

"They get more like their mother every day. It gets harder to curb their Shauna like tendencies every day!" James said exasperated.

"I know exactly what it is like mate. I went thought the same with Lex and I only had one of her. I didn't do the best of jobs either she helped Shauna break her out. I keep expecting the police to burst in here and arrest her. I can only hope the kids are out when they do!"

"It is only a matter of time Dan. The three of them are in big trouble!"

"I know it! They can't keep this up. Lex knows she's eventually gonna get arrested and she is ready to go down for it too! If you see them just tell them to take care of themselves and each other ok."

"I doubt I'll be seeing them. They are going into hiding. How dramatic is that?" James asked in disbelief.

"I know but the three of them always did have a flair for the dramatic. Alice included!" Danny mentioned.

"Shauna has been getting right into CSI I could see her not touching stuff in case for prints and maybe even performing an autopsy on Miss while she screams I'm still alive!"

Danny would have laughed if he didn't miss Missy so much it hurt! It was weird he'd been worried that whatever spark that had existed between them was fizzling out but now she was gone he ached with an unyielding intensity.

"Don't worry Danny. They'll take care of each other." James said after Danny's rather large silence.

"It's not that I'm worried about. They are both so… I dunno stupid in a way. They are even worse when they are together. Like if Miss ran out of pills I could see them holding up a pharmacy for them but guess what they don't have a weapon so they do something really daft like hide a banana in a sock!"

James chuckled. "I agree I can so see that! Shauna waving it around. Missy demanding pills!"

"I'm deadly serious James. See that's what they're like. Especially without Alice here to stop them going to far! They have these daft ideas which they think are really clever and there's no one to stop them acting on impulse."

"Like Alice could have stopped them anyway. She would have thought of a better idea and joined in!" James told him.

"If you hear anything James. Anything at all."

"I swear I'll ring you. I'll tell Shay to tell Miss to get in touch if I see her. Congratulations on Ryan too."

"Thanks James." Danny exhaled and disconnected. He just hoped Missy got better soon!

**A/N sorry if this seems abit fractured i cut abit out coz this story is getting stupidly long. there's still quite abit to go. and i sed about 5 chapters who was i kidding?**

**plus my K is broken on my keyboard thanks to the lilt OMG that child lol good fing i love him 2 bitz :) just incase words dnt make sense x**


	67. D16 Support

**4 Weeks Later**

Missy was fighting against restraints.

"Dammit Miss stop fighting!" an angry voice yelled. "You know what your going back. I am washing my hands of you!"

Missy swung her arm. Shuana ducked just in time.

"Miss you nearly got me there! If you hit me all bets are off!" the voice hissed. "I am so not getting paid enough for this. That is the last time I trust you to take your meds!"

"Your not Shauna!" Missy hissed swinging again.

Shauna ducked again. "I swear to God Miss!" she yelled angrily. Your pushing me!"

"Where's Shauna!"

Shauna finally got a grip on her wrists and held them down tightly. "I AM SHAUNA! I am the only person stupid enough to put up with erratic behaviour!"Missy was wriggling and pushing trying to get free. "Look Miss I'll release you and leave you alone but only if you promise not to swing for me and break my jaw ok?"

"Bite me!" Missy spat.

"Don't tempt me!" Shauna warned. "I'll bite your freaking head off!"

They looked at each other for a moment. Missy nodded timidly.

"Right, I'm loosening my grip and be warned my guard is up!" she loosened her grip by degrees. Missy lay limp on the bed. Although she glared at her heatedly. She climbed from the bed. "Right I'm backing slowly from the room."

Missy sprang from the bed and threw a punch with her left hand. Shauna caught her fist.

"Aha I knew you had something planned. I know you well Miss!" she gloated.

"Not well enough to anticipate this!" Missy replied, as she spoke she threw a right fisted punch. Shauna ducked.

"I need some sort of danger money for this!" Shauna muttered.

Missy roared in anger picked up the lamp on the bedside table. Smashed it off Shauna's head. She lay motionless on the floor.

"Not so clever now are we?" Missy asked and dusted her hands off.

After a few moments Shauna groaned. "You are so freaking dead Miss!" she said weakly. Getting up on her knees. Was soon standing and looking at Missy with a deadly expression. "So dead!" Shauna was beyond rational thought, she launched at Missy and they hit the floor. They were rolling battling for supremacy.

"After all I do for you, you smash my step dad's lamp over my head?" Punched Missy in the stomach. Missy grunted in pain but reacted with a punch to the side of her head. They fought till they collapsed beside each other. They lay still on the floor, both breathing hard exhausted. Aching and bleeding.

Shauna out her hand to her face. Her nose ached across the bridge.

"Dammit Miss you better not have broke my nose! It's not like I can go to hospital. It'll heal wonky!"

Missy lay breathing heavily.

"It's the last time I fight you. You got a mean right hook, Ouch! I'll still be feeling it next week!"

Missy was still silent.

"You so better not be blaming me for this. You started it Miss!"

"Your not Shauna. Shauna wouldn't keep me against my will! Shauna wouldn't have had a fight with me!"

"Err Shauna would if Missy smashed a lamp over her head! There is only so much Shauna can take. Shauna is not a saint!"

Missy was again quiet.

"God Miss what on earth are you planning. You scare me when your quiet. I can feel the cogs turning in your mind. Your planning my doom aren't you?"

Missy turned her head and looked at her. An sneaky smile spread across her face.

"I give up. Just do whatever you are gonna do coz I'm too tired to try and stop you and aching too much to try and fight back. You win Miss! You beat me!" Shauna said wearily. "I have had this for a couple of days now Miss I thought I was strong enough to deal with it but I guess I'm not!"

Missy's face changed. She didn't recognise this tone on her. But she recognised the voice. She sounded upset. Like she had failed her best friend.

"Nothing." Missy said softly relenting. "I'm not planning anything."

"Will you please just take your tablet and lie down. Please for me. You'll be fine!" Shauna pleaded.

Missy's eyes narrowed again.

"You owe me Miss I got you outta there!"

Missy nodded stiffly and sat up. Grabbed her ribs. Shaun handed her the tablet and water off the dresser. She took the tablet and lay on the bed and closed her eyes.

Shauna walked from the room smiling. Emotional blackmail! Always worked a charm! God Miss was a pushover!

(X)

Missy awoke slowly. Wow that dream. That had happened way back in the beginning after Shauna had first brought her here. She had convinced her self that she didn't need the medication so she had stopped taking it. The voices had came back with avengeance telling her that Shauna wasn't Shauna but an impostor trying to poison her. God she was soooooo stupid!

They had arrived in Glasgow no problem. Went and picked up an array of things from Shauna's house. Picked up a cooler of food. Then went to Shauna's mum's house had gave them another 2 coolers of food. Missy smiled as she thought of Mrs Elliott. She had been so kind and understanding and looked really good for being 68. She'd walked down to the car as she and Shauna had climbed out and engulfed her in a big hug. Missy who hadn't had a pill in a while was feeling fuzzy and out of it had no idea how to react so she patted her back awkwardly. Then Shauna spoke up.

"Mum knows, it wasn't a big surprise Miss. She just wondered why I wasn't in there with you!" she joked.

Missy had of course frowned like she hadn't understood the joke which of course in her less than whole mental state she hadn't understood it. It was then Shauna's mother had elbowed her.

"Can't you see the poor girl is out of it!"

"Is she?" Shauna whispered. Waved her hand in front of her face. She just looked ahead wondering why Shauna was waving a hand in front of her face.

"I best get her home huh?" Shauna whispered.

"Yeah. Will she be ok Shauna?"

Shauna had looked at her worry covering her face with lines.

"I hope so mum. I'm beginning to wonder whether this was such a good idea.

"In the front of the first cooler is a book on post partum psychosis. It should help you Shauna. If you get in any trouble though phone me. Where your are going is isolated and if one of you get hurt there's no one to get in touch up there!"

"I will mum!" Shauna had then hugged her mum tight and kissed her. "You're the best mum!"

"I know. Now scat yeah!"

They'd went back to the car and Shauna had gave her another table. Missy had smiled but hadn't taken it.

After a couple of hours drive they had arrived in Ayr. Brian had a cabin in the woods up there. It was quiet secluded. Peaceful. Just the type of place Missy need to recover. Until her delusions had returned. Poor Shauna had been in the firing line. Missy was such a bad friend after everything Shauna had done to her and Missy had planned to knock her block off. If Shaun didn't have such good reflexes it would have happened too!

She climbed from her bed and stretched. No more pills for her. She had completed the course of medication and Shauna had followed the therapy exercises in the book she felt a lot better. Not one hundred percent but who ever felt like that at all? She hadn't had a pill in nearly two weeks and hadn't even heard a squeak of a voice. Any time she felt a little off she didn't bottle it up but tried to talk it through with Shauna. Shauna her best friend in the whole world who had went above and beyond the call of duty this time. Put up with far more than anyone else who have even considered. Missy wouldn't have blamed Shauna is she had smothered her in her sleep and dumped body in the woods!

Missy padded into the kitchen.

"hey Miss." Shauna too a bite of her toast engrossed in novel.

"Hey Shauns. What you reading?"

"The Lake by Richard Laymon. It's Brian's. Pretty good actually." she turned the page.

Missy bent over and looked at the back. "You do now it's a horror!"

Shauna shrugged. "Not so far. Charlie Payne sounds well hot….wait…..sadly he just fell to his death eew splattered brains. Gruesome! O well I will have to lust over Mace instead. He sounds cute too!"

Missy rolled her eyes with a small smile. She shook her head.

Shauna closed her book and laid it on the table. "So Miss how do you feel this morning?"

"I dunno Shauns." she admitted.

"Right Miss we don't need fight night round 2 so spill."

"I just feel so bad about you how I attacked you and how I'm keeping you from your family. And I'm wondering about Ryan." she paused. "And Danny. Ryan mostly though."

"I wondered when you would bring him up. Both of them actually." Shauna exhaled. "We should try you out in public first before you see Ryan. You could freak out you now. Spesh after it just being me and you for so long. We've practically been recluses! I can't see you freaking though. You'll take it in your stride. Better safe then sorry though eh?"

"That's the point though Shauns, I don't feel like me anymore. Inside it's like an intrinsic part of me is missing. I can't find me. I've lost myself!"

"I had noticed." Shauna commented.

"So how do I get me back?" Missy asked.

Shauna raised her hands in a gesture of unknown. "The people around you are sometimes the ones who define you Miss."

"So do you thin I should go back to Africa?"

"You know my thoughts on that matter Miss. But I'm not gonna coerce you. If YOU want to go back then go Miss. If that is where you feel you need to be."

Missy frowned and picked at her toast.

"How do you feel about going back?"

"I feel….I dunno Shauns. I have no idea if I can ever go back. I think about Ryan my son." she squeaked the final word. "I just feel empty. I feel nothing when I say his name. shouldn't I feel like a motherly connection. I mean it's sort of like I waited all those years for the right person to have him and now he's here it's like he isn't even mine, not in the way I mean before just… oh I dunno!" she said frustrated.

Shauna put her hand on Missy arm. "It's understandable Miss. You don't now him. It'll happen."

"This didn't happen to you and Alice though. You didn't lose your minds. No you were like perfect straight from the off!"

"Miss this isn't a competition. I know you'll love him. I get a sense of it now which is why your so worried."

Missy put her hand over her eyes.

"What about Danny?" Shauna asked knowing that talking about Ryan was upsetting her.

"I feel nothing for him either. I went through hell in there Shauna and if it weren't for you and Lex I'd still be in there strapped to that bed being pumped full of unnecessary drugs."

Shauna nodded. "Lets think what would Alice say if she was here?" Shauna suggested.

"Stop being so soft. How couldn't you lay into each other. Who got the best? Lets go bomb the hell out of the hospital and kick Clive's ass for good measure. To name a few." Missy said softly.

Shauna laughed. "That'd be right. You'd help her with the bombing and the kicking ass no doubt."

"A little." Missy told her. They both sat silent in thought.

"If I now Alice and I do then she'd tell me to face up to what was bothering me instead of hiding from it." Missy said finally.

"Does going back to Africa bother you Miss?" Shauna asked.

"Well yeah. What if they try to section me again? I can't go back there Shay!"

"Miss your fine now. All you needed was support."

"I think I'll stay with you a little while longer." Missy told her. "Is that ok?"

"Miss you know you are welcome to stay with me as long as you need to."

She threw Shauna a small smile. "Thanks Shay."

"Anyways we're heading back to Glasgow today and not before time! Mum send a letter by pigeon. Everything had died down finally!"

"Woo hoo!" Missy said dryly.

"I'm taking the kids to the circus to celebrate. You should come."

"Na. I'll be good at home Shauna."

"Miss you need to get out. It'll be fun. For once you won't be the only clown in a room."

"I'm ok. been to the circus. Got bored."

"Who gets bored at the circus?" Shauna scoffed.

"Me, so drop it." Missy retorted.

"Mi-iss."

"Shauna are you telling me to go?" Missy asked sharply.

"NO, I'd never do that." Shauna was shaking her head.

"Well get off my back then!" Missy snapped crossed her arms angrily.

"Miss what's wrong? Usually you would be more excited than the kids."

"Well I'm not. I'll be happy as a clam at home."

"Your right. You have changed and it's not for the better. Your quiet. Careful. You usually get up and go. Always a fly by the seat of your pants type of woman."

"Yeah and look what good that did me. I got locked up. Nearly lost my mind!"

"Miss I'd never do that to you."

Missy exhaled. "I now Shauns. But forcing me into situations won't make me better. I just need to do stuff in my own time at my own pace."

"You used to go for the throat Miss."

"Yeah well I spent 4 days getting given drugs which I didn't need. Now tell me that wouldn't change you. I'm trying to get myself back to normal but I have no idea if I'll be get to the person I was before."

"Sitting around moping isn't gonna get you back to normal Miss!"

"Shay please just let me deal with this in my own way!"

Shauna looked at Missy made a resigned face. "I forgot how stubborn you are!" she commented.

Missy grinned. "I forgot how bossy you are!" she retorted.

Shauna stood. "C'mon Miss lets get our stuff ready!"

**A/N oooo fighting, and making up. a pretty full chapter. off they go bac to glasgow bt missy is so obviously not herself and worried she never will be AND will she ever b able to go bk to leopards den? keep readin 2 find out x**


	68. D17 Reminder

Shauna was driving and Missy was gazing out of the window, looking at the rolling hills of the Scotland countryside. The air was heavy with dew. The whole place smelled fresh and clean. The wind blew in her face and ruffled her hair. She inhaled a lung full of clean fresh air.

"I'm move here one day. It's so nice. Quiet." Missy whispered unwanting to ruin the silence.

"You'd go insane…." Shauna cursed herself.

Missy looked at her eyebrows raised in amusement.

"Sorry I just meant that the reception is crap…for your mobile…you now coz it never leaves your hand…"

"It's ok Shauna I knew what you meant!" she smiled and looked back out of the window. The smile was a ghost of it's former glory. "You know in a way this place reminds me of Leopards Den. Not how it looks just the feeling you have when you're here. Like your at peace. Contentment it's nice." she trailed off letting it wash over her.

It didn't last long though. They were soon on the motorway. Missy rolled her window back up.

"Civilisation sucks!" she drawled.

"Yup. We couldn't hide away forever! I can't wait to get back to my girls. I missed them so much. I know I spoke to them on the phone all the day but it isn't the same."

"I'm sorry I took you from your kids Shauna." Missy said guiltily.

"You needed me Miss. I didn't hesitate. I am always here for you. We're sisters. Remember the vow we made on Alice's wedding day? That no matter what we'd always be here. Sisters are always there for each other no questions asked."

"We're more than sisters Shay. It goes far deeper than that." Missy told her. "We closer than sisters could ever be. See they are sorta forced to love each other coz they are family. We don't have bonds like that. We do what we do coz we genuinely care."

Shauna nodded smiling.

"We could be sisters you know."

"NO WAY! Did our parents cheat?" she laughed jokingly.

"I didn't mean it that way. I just meant we look quite alike. Same hair colour. Eye colour body shape. Even the shape of our face is the same. Except your cheeks are chubbier than mine."

"Hey don't be calling me fat!" Shauna warned.

"And I'm taller than you."

"And I'm a short arse too!" Shauna said dryly.

"Hey I hated being the tallest, how many times did you and Alice drop me all in the name of friendship? I lost count of the amount of times. I swear I have numerous lines all over my skull where you cracked it. You know it got to the point where I could pinpoint the exact second you or Alice were gonna drop me. I resigned myself I always got the same oh no we won't drop you this time. 2 minutes later I'm on the floor!"

Shauna chuckled. "We didn't drop you deliberately. Well a couple of times we did. Your reaction used to be so funny. You'd pick yourself up. Cross your arms then in a high pitched voice say didn't I tell you you'd drop me? It's always me! You do it on purpose!"

"Oh not us!" Missy replied. "You had big dirty grins on your faces. You so did!"

"We didn't drop you on your head deliberately after you split your head open though!" Shauna shook her head. "We thought you were joking at first. You were reaching up to get the ball from the tree and Alice started to wobble. I told you to grab the branch but you didn't Alice went down and you landed on your forehead. You weren't moving knocked out. We seriously thought we had killed you. Alice ran to my mums hysterical. You scared the life out of us."

"Wasn't a barrel of laughs for me either matey." Missy grinned. "I didn't have a proper nights sleep for a week. My mum kept waking me!"

"Well you were the tallest. And the heaviest." she added softly.

"I heard that Carr face!"

"Haha Lynch pin!"

"We'd always end up fighting after we dropped you. It was always a fun play fight though. Your height did come in handy that time in year 7 when that year 9 girl was having a go at Alice coz she was tiny. She didn't tell us in case her friends started on us. We found out anyway and I cornered her in the toilets. She started to push me til you walked in. You matched her in height and she was nervous. We then told her in no uncertain terms what we would do to her unless she left our friend alone. Of course she thought we were bluffing so we decided to implement our plan. Until hot head over there noticed her cocky smile on the yard so you dropped your bag walked over and smacked her in the mouth. Wiped the smile right off her face!"

"My mum killed me for that. No laptop. No Ipod. No TV. I was grounded for a month! I wasn't even allowed to phone you for help with homework! I wonder why Alice just didn't handle it Collins style?"

"I know I always wondered that too. Oooo look I'm nearly home!" Shauna said excitedly.

"Can I ask you one favour? Before you jump on James can I least be out of the room?" Missy asked sweetly.

Shauna grinned. "I'll try Miss. I will try!"

Missy rolled her eyes.

"Hey I remember what you used to be lie with Karl. You'd be gone an hour and you acted like you hadn't seen him in days!"

"We weren't that bad!"

"I have been away for a month with ugly you for company. I need a good looking man to give me therapy!"

"Your uglier than me! I need a good looking man. I'm surprised you can control yourself around me!" Missy said seriously

"You wish!" Shauna declared.

"I'd rather not go there actually!"

"Agreed!" Shauna said smiling.

"Since you have been gone a month I'll wait out here for 5 seconds. That is all it will take!" Missy joked.

"Don't be dissing my man Miss!" Shauna replied playfully.

"Look Shauna did James mention if Danny has been in touch?"

"He rang everyday at first but that was only the first week. It has dwindled since then. He hasn't phoned in the last week."

Missy looked sad. "Didn't take him long to forget me huh?"

The car pulled to a stop. Shauna let herself out. "Your too good for him mate. The sooner you work that out the better!" she then skipped up her to her door and rested her body against it. "I've missed you!" she whispered.

"And it was ME they sectioned!" Missy drawled following her. She walked in the house and Shauna was kissing her TV. I'll never leave you again. What has James and the kids put you through!"

"I repeat Shay it was ME they sectioned!"

"O yeah." Shauna said smiling. The phone rang. "Yay I get to answer my phone." she bounced over and picked it up.

"Hello Shauna's burger bar. You kill em we grill em!"

Missy rolled her eyes and went to walk in the kitchen. Til Shauna gasped.

"Shauna? Right where's Missy?" Danny declared on the other end of the phone.

"Sorry you have the wrong number!" she slammed the phone down. It rang again. Shauna ignored it and smiled at missy.

"Who is it Shauna?" Missy asked.

"Wrong number!" she said breezily.

"Yeah right like I believe that!" the ringing was getting on Missy's nerves so she walked over. Removed Shauna's hand off the receiver.

"Don't Miss." Shauna advised.

Missy picked up the phone.

"Shauna!" An irate voice asked. Missy jerked. God it was Danny! "I swear if you don't tell me where she is I'm gonna come over and get her myself!"

Missy was quiet.

"Shauna?" he asked.

Shauna took the phone. "Does that sound like she wants to see you? Talk to you?

"That silence was Miss?" he asked in disbelief.

"Yeah Danny."

"I don't believe it! Missy loves me!"

"I don't know what you said to her but all the work I done in the last month has disappeared. Don't phone again Danny she doesn't want you!" she put the phone down expecting it to ring again. It didn't. She went over to Missy was who sat frowning.

"Tell me about it Miss. Don't bottle it up!"

"He wants to take me back there! He said he was gonna get me and bring me back. I don't know if he meant back to Africa or…"

"Oh Miss!" Shauna sympathised.

"He wouldn't would he?" Missy asked quickly.

"Missy I am being a hundred percent honest with you here I don't know, I never thought her would have you sectioned in the first place. I never thought he would have left you there when you needed help. And even now my gut is telling me he wouldn't do that to you but I don't know mate."

It was then they noticed the letters on the coffee table with. She picked one up and tore it open. Pulled out the contents. It was photographs of Ryan and the kids. Missy looked through them.

"Daniel and Amie looked great with him. Naturals." she remarked. There was a picture of them playing with him on the floor.

"Look at Ryan though Miss. He is well the double of you. What a little cutie!"

"These were taken last week. He's so much bigger than I remember him." she murmured. "He doesn't know me!" she said sadly. Shoved the pictures back in the envelope tossed them on the coffee table. Stood up and walked upstairs. Slammed the bathroom door.

Shauna followed her. "Miss this isn't your fault!"

"Go away Shauna I'm busy!"

"You can't feel guilty about this. You were ill. Needed help!"

The door flew open. "So now I can't go to the bathroom in peace?"

"Nope." Shauna said grinning.

"I'm going for a walk I need air!" Missy hissed.

"I'll be right here when you get back!"

"If I come back!" she muttered. Walked briskly trying to escape her dark thoughts.

**A/N aww will miss ever get ova what happened to her? who knows keep reading and reviewin thanx x**


	69. D18 A New Trio

Missy left the house and started to walk absently. Unknowingly she walked a route she had walked countless times before. She passed her old house. A new family lived their now her parents were gone. Shauna's old house. Again a new family lived their. Alice's old house. It was empty at the moment. A for sale sign stood there. Lots of happy memories on this route. Happier memories in the houses. Well not as they grew older. Not for her and Alice anyway. Funny the attack wasn't on her mind anymore. Her little outburst with Clive seemed to have cured her. Having Ryan cured her too she liked to think. Everything else paled in importance to him. WOW where had that came from? She wondered. She carried on walking again following a route she hadn't walked in decades.

Missy arrived at the park they had spent time in as kids. They played here. Fought here. Cried here. Talked and dreamed here. Mooned over the boys playing football especially. She sat at the old picnic bench they used to sit at while the boys played football she closed her eyes.

"_Him in the green is so fit!" Alice whispered._

"_His name is Terry." Shauna whispered._

"_Him in the Barcelona top one word. Droolalicious!" Missy murmured._

"_That isn't a word Miss!"_

"_I made it up just for him!" Missy grinned._

"_You could be well in there Miss." Alice suggested._

"_Na no chance look at him like he wouldn't take one look at me!"_

"_Hey Miss. Your gorgeous!" Shauna declared._

"_No Shauna your gorgeous. I'm plain!"_

"_Don't be daft!" Alice countered._

"_Tell you what I'll talk to him if you talk to Terry!" Missy negotiated._

_Alice grinned. "Fine!"_

"_Hey I want in on the action too!" Shauna declared. "I pick hmmm tough choice. I pick that cutie in the blue top."_

"_I bet we have them all eating out of the palm of our hands!" Alice grinned cockily._

Missy cut off her musings. Alice had been right. By the end of the day they had all had boyfriends. Only Alice's had lasted a while through. Missy dumped Mr Droolalicious after a few days. Gorgeous but shallow! And Shauna fell out with Mr Cutie. She thought of her life as it was. A new mother separated from her child. God she should never have had a child. She was a rubbish mother! She exhaled. Again thought back to years ago it was nicer than thinking of her life as it was. She could do without the depression to be honest.

They all used to meet on this exact spot years ago. In those hot lazy summers they used to pray would come quicker. You don't realise how fast childhood goes til it is gone. She'd do anything to go back to that time with her best friends when her only worry was getting in on time for her tea. They used to go exploring and anything else they could think to do for fun. They had all been tom boys at first then Shauna went and turned girly who in turn turned Alice who in turn turned her. Still they weren't scared of a bit of mud. Except Shauna when she turned 13. She should never have told her and Alice. Come on what had she been thinking. Give us ammo why don't you Shay! Missy's pulled out her phone and looked at a long ago taken picture. The three of them on a wall arms around each other. They were 20 here but all looked about 16. She had just got back off her travels. She then looked at a photo taken off a photo of them at 12. Grinning widely. Carefree at the beach. Alice was buried and Shauna and Missy were piling sand on her.

She remembered something they had done long ago. Wandered till she found their tree. Their initials were still there.

_AC, SC,ML,BFF _She traced her finger over them.

Alice Collins. Shauna Carr, Melissa Lynch, Best Friends Forever.

"This is all wrong! Alice isn't a Collins and Shauna isn't a Carr." She murmured to herself. She looked around and saw a sharp stone. Set about recarving new initials below the old ones

_AT, SO'D, ML, SBFF_

Alice Trevanion. Shauna O'Donell Melissa Lynch. Still Best Friends Forever.

She nodded in satisfaction. "Much better, you've been out of date too long!"

"What you doing to our tree?" 3 girls asked.

Missy turned and looked at them a red head. A blond and a brunette. They looked to be about 12.

"Don't be messing with our initials!" the brunette said cockily. Missy recognised the look on her face

"Your initials?" Missy asked with a smile.

"Well not ours per se." The red head spoke up "But they are similar to ours."

"The person who did them should fix them! And YOU shouldn't be getting rid of them!" The blond said stepping forward hands on her hips.

Missy grinned she could tell that they thought she was gonna get rid of them. Like an adult wouldn't carve names in a tree.

"I did do them. Well me and my two friends did them. Just over…wow thirty years ago. God how fast does time fly?" she murmured looking at the old initials.

"Are you still not friends?" the blond asked at her sad face. "These 2 are my best friends." they linked arms. "Us against the world. We'll be friends forever!"

The other girls nodded in agreement.

Missy smiled at them. "Yeah. We're friends. I miss one though" ran her finger over Alice's initials. "She died 2 years ago" she said softly.

"That's sad." the red head told her.

"What do they stand for?" the brunette asked. Her brown eyes twinkled with mischief. Reminded her of someone she used to know very well. Unfortunately she was lost at the moment.

Missy pointed to AC, "Alice Collins," then SC "Shauna Carr." ML. "Melissa Lynch Best friends forever." she showed them the picture of them in their 20's sat on the wall.

"You look happy, not like now." the red head told her. The brunette elbowed her.

"Your like us then!" The blond spoke up. Her blue eyes animated. "I'm Amber."

The red head spoke up. "I'm Shandra. Shane and Sandra after my parents!" she said in disgust.

"And finally the best saved for last. I am Molly!" she bowed with a flourish.

"So you're the new trio that has Scotland trembling huh?"

"Hey I like that!" Molly declared "Well not the new bit. Who was the old one?" Molly asked.

Missy grinned cockily. Molly nodded in approval. "I'd better be going now. Shauna will be worried about me. Shauna is the other blond on my picture."

"So it was Alice who died then?" Amber asked.

Missy nodded.

"She'll never leave you best friends never do!" Amber told her.

Molly rolled her eyes.

Missy smiled widely. "Thanks. Just remember one thing ok. Stick together. Boys and men come and go but what best friends share is forever!"

"Ok. Bye. Say hello to Shauna for us!" Shandra said.

"We don't know her fool!" Molly muttered walking away.

"I was being polite Moll." she said to her in a dry tone.

Molly tutted.

"God are you two off again?" Amber asked and exhaled. "What do I have to put up with?"

Missy had a huge smile on her face as she walked home. Those girls were her Alice and Shauna all those years ago! Missy had an epiphany. Life goes on whether you want it to or not dwelling on things changed nothing. All it did was made you bitter and twisted! God she owed the girls a lot. Especially Molly. Seeing her reminded her of someone she hadn't been since she was 12 years old. She remembered how that girl used to be. Unafraid. Happy. Carefree. If something beat her she got up and went back at it full force. She never gave up on anything especially family. Not like now, she had gave up on Ryan and Danny!

She stopped at Alice's old house for a moment. Remembered happier times. Saw a young Alice running from the house at top speed towards her and Shauna on the first day of the end of term they were eager for their summer to start. They were 9. She hadn't shut the door. Her mother appeared and shouted that she forgot to shut the door. Alice waved at her. She waved back smiling.

She walked on and was quickly at Shauna's. Thought about that as she walked on. Didn't want to appear a weirdo to the family who lived there. Thought of the time they tried to sneak Alice in the house when she visited. Shook her head as the happy memory filled her.

And finally her old house. Not so happy memories here with her family but the ones with her friends were the best. She saw them all in the garden. With their matching pink prams a tea party set up on the other side. Shauna telling them in a superior tone what to do with their 'babies' see her mums friend at work had just had a baby and she was an expert! Yeah right! She dropped her doll more times then she held it! She missed this!

"I have the best friends ever Alice." She whispered happily. "I love you mate."

She arrived at Shauna's house and engulfed her in a big hug as soon as she saw her.

"Miss you ok?" Shauna asked worriedly.

"Who me. Yeah. I'm really good." she said happily.

"Where you been I've been worried about you!"

"I saw us at the park Shauna!" She told her excitedly.

"Miss are you delusional?" Shauna asked seriously.

"Probably knowing me!" she giggled. "Well not US us but what I meant is I went to the tree where we carved or names and I realised they were all wrong so I recarved them underneath. I looked behind me and these 3 girls were stood there. They were about 12 and pissed I was messing with the initials. They looked nothing like us but the group dynamic was the same. One of them Amber she was the clear leader. Alice." she said simply. "The there was Shandra. Careful but dippy. Warm-hearted but abit daft you know. You could tell she would fight to the death for her friends. She was so you Shauna. And finally the mad one. The funny one. Made jokes but soft inside. Hard as nails too. Her name was Molly and she was so much like me it was scary. I found my mini doppelganger!"

"Really?" Shauna was grinning at the thought of big Miss with younger Miss. "That must have been hilarious!"

"They pulled me about the initials. Shandra says hello by the way." Missy laughed. "So you!" she repeated.

The door opened and twin girls walked in.

"Auntie Missy!" they yelled then noticed their mother. "MUM!"

They ran to their mum and hugged her tightly. Then they were by Missy's side asking her questions.

"Hey while your mum is cooking tea why don't I tell you the best way to annoy her huh?"

The girls nodded vigorously.

"They are gonna have your life by the time I'm finished Shay!"

"O God she's back!" Shauna muttered.

"This is what you wanted!"

"I've created a monster is it too late to change my mind?"

"Yup!" Missy grinned. "Missy is back and here to stay. I don't know how I ever lost this!"

Missy then walked into the kitchen and talked animatedly to the girls. Shauna listened to her girls laughter. She was so relieved that Missy was finally getting back to her old self. She'd feel better about herself and Ryan when she rediscovered who she used to be.

**A/N ok miss is back :) bt will she go bk to africa or will something force her hand hmmmm cryptic comments :)**


	70. D19 Return

Danny sat still in slight shock. He'd needed so badly to hear Melissa's voice. Just for a second, he missed her. He felt empty. If he heard her just for a second he'd know she was ok. As it was she and Shauna had just disappeared off the face of the earth - until that phone call. He'd give this to Shauna if she didn't want to be found then she wasn't gonna be! So he'd rang again fully expecting it to ring off, or for even to be told by James that no mate no word no sign. But Shauna had answered and his heart had filled with hope. Not only because Shauna had answered but because she sounded happy! That was good wasn't it? It meant they were home and Missy was, fingers crossed, better. So he had of course in his haste to be sure she was ok demanded to speak to her. Know where she was and she promptly slammed the phone down on him. With so much force he heard the impact on this side of the phone! Him being him he rang again and again and again. I mean if Shauna was home Missy was home right? And he wasn't giving up on her that easily. No way no how, they loved each other and love meant you never gave up no matter how hard it was!

After each phone call he got more and more frustrated. Felt his anger building too. If no one had answered he fully intended to go to Africa and go get her! That's how much he needed her. When the phone was picked up unexpectedly those were the words that tumbled from him. His reply had been laboured breathing. He knew then it was Missy and that he had blew it. If he hadn't sounded like a mad man he might have been able to bring her home but no he ranted and probably scared her off. Then of course Shauna came on and confirmed what he feared that it had been Missy and no she didn't wanna talk to him. At first he thought well she might not wanna talk to me - yet. Shauna destroyed that dream too. All with 5 words. She doesn't want you anymore. He had denied it at first. Shauna had told him not to ring again. By now his heart was torn into shreds. He KNEW she loved him and no one was telling him any different dammit! She accused him of making her worse. Like she had been better and he sent her back into her spiral of madness and depression. God that had hurt him almost as much as thinking she didn't love him anymore. He wouldn't do that to her.

That had to be Shauna talking though. Melissa did love him! She'd promised to always love him! Just keep telling yourself Danny she needs time that's all. Then why hasn't she been in touch. She could write you a letter which doesn't involve her having to speak to him at all! Or even an email huh? Coz Shauna is actually right, Missy doesn't love you anymore. God this hurt a lot. More than he ever thought possible. He should have known she'd destroy him. She had warned him often enough what she was capable of. How she'd hurt him and like a fool he had believed that his love would change her. Give her stability and safety - something she had never had before. He'd been so confident that once he had her she'd never go. He'd been so wrong! He had stuff to do. He had to take his mind off the hurt that coursed through him.

**Later that night (Back In Glasgow)**

Missy was sat in the house alone. It was quiet. The clock ticked monotonously. I wonder if I could hypnotise myself? She mused. If I could what would I tell myself to do? That's actually a tough one actually. I'd no doubt get myself in trouble. I always do! She was alone coz Shauna, James and the kids had gone to the circus. They had invited Miss but she had graciously declined. She just didn't wanna go, to be honest the body contortionists creeped her out. How on earth did they fit themselves in those tiny spaces? The clowns scared her a little too.

She had nothing to do here. She listened to the clock tick her life away. Shauna being Shauna had taken her blackberry hostage. Danny had rang it. Left voicemails, texts. Emails. Shauna had saw her wavering and had took it while she sorted the table for tea with the girls. God she missed him. Ryan too. All of the kids actually. Lex, Eth, Daniel, Amie Zoey and EJ. Now that she was getting back to her old self old the old feelings she used to feel were rushing back. But she still wasn't sure whether she could go back. She had seen a doctor while Shauna had been away and he had gave her the all clear. Sanity wise. He said she was perfectly sane well for her anyway! She had asked him to sign a form just to make sure too! So they couldn't throw her back in hospital. Not that would stop them! She just knew that she couldn't go back in there!

She heard a melodic jingle. She listened hard. Was that her phone? YES! It's her phone! Excitement streaked through her. God simple things made her happy. She followed the music. When she reached the kitchen it stopped.

"Oh no ring again!" she pleaded. She asked.

The melodic ringing began again. "Yes!" she heard it in a cupboard. Rifled in them pulled out a vibrating biscuit tin.

"O thanks Shay now my phone is gonna smell like vanilla and chocolate!"

She pulled the lid off the tin and her phone which had rang was now silent.

"Ha ha Shauna beat again!" she whispered. She nearly whooped with joy. Her beloved blackberry. "Come to the one who loves you baby!" she murmured. "Promise me you'll never leave me again!" she had been going stark raving mad….she stopped that thought. She'd never be so flippant with those words or her sanity ever again! Not after what she went through. Her losing mind had become a very definite possibility if she hadn't of got out of there when she did!

She pressed some buttons and saw she had some missed calls from Ethan. As well as some voicemails. She seriously debated on ignoring them. Deleting them even! But then again this was Ethan. He wouldn't call her for Danny. It might be important! Her curiosity got the better of her and she played it.

'You have 2 new messages. Message one.' a robotic voice said tonelessly.

"Missy it's Ethan I need you to call me as soon as you get this. It's urgent!"

Missy frowned. Oh god what was wrong!

'Press one to reply to the message. 2 to save or 3 to delete.'

Missy pressed 3.

'Message 2' the robotic voice told her.

"Right Miss!" An irate Ethan said. "I see you haven't rang me! Lex has been arrested! I need you back here right now. They are gonna charge her with a whole array of charges which will see her going down for a long time! So get home now and get this sorted!" he yelled.

Missy put the phone down immediately.

"Shit!" she muttered. Rang Ethan.

"I just got your messages. When was she arrested?"

"2 days ago. Her solicitor thinks they are gonna charge her tomorrow. They have gathered evidence! God he's rubbish!"

"With what"

"Arson, assault, drugs criminal damage. Perverting the course of justice. I can't remember the rest. She is in deep trouble Miss! I need you to get back here. If you tell them why she kidnapped you…" he trailed off.

"2 days Ethan why hasn't anyone got in touch sooner? Right hold tight ok. I'm gonna ring my solicitors over here he'll arrange decent legal representation over there for her ok. I'm gonna then get the first flight I can ok. Try not to stress out too much."

"I'll see you soon Miss." he said sadly. His tone betrayed how much he missed Lexi.

Missy disconnected and rang her solicitors. They were straight on it.

"God Lex has been arrested!" she muttered. Alice's kill her if she knew Miss was the cause of her daughter being sent down! And not only that she was not gonna let Lexi go down for this. No way no how! She grabbed a piece of paper and a pen.

'Shauns gotta go back to Africa. Lex arrested. I can't let her go down for this. For me. Speak soon. Love you all. Miss x'

She threw a few clothes in a bag along with her passport, the photos of Ryan and her credit cards. She pocketed her sunglasses and called a taxi.

(X)

Missy was sat on a plane. She felt sick to the pit of her stomach. She was twitching. Looked out of the window at black dark sky. Felt a jolt. It felt like 5 minutes ago she had been looking at white fluffy clouds. Time was flying over quickly. She felt ill!

"O god what am I doing?" she muttered to herself.

'Helping Lex so toughen up Miss!' she told herself sternly.

"You'll be fine dear" the old woman beside her said.

"What?" Missy asked jarred from her pep talk.

"You'll be fine. I used to be nervous about flying too. It's something you have to get used to."

Missy smiled. "Yeah." the woman attributed her nervousness to flying not the fact that Missy thought she was gonna be locked in a mental institute the second she set foot on the tarmac. If she even had an inkling that was what was wrong Missy doubted she'd be talking to her. More likely was that she would ask to be moved!

"I'm going to see my new baby granddaughter and grandson. Twins." she said proudly.

"I'm going to see my family too. I've been away for a month. My niece is in trouble. Needs my help." Missy told her softly.

"You obviously care a great deal! Especially if your willing to fly to go and help them. Especially since it's apparent you hate it."

"I love them all a lot." Missy told her seriously.

"Do they not love you?" the woman asked curiously.

"Why do you ask that?"

"Just the way you said that. You sounded sure and confident of your feelings but at the same time unsure of theirs."

"I suppose they do love me. The kids do." Missy murmured.

"You have children?"

"No…yes. One. A little boy. Ryan. I have step kids too - well in a way. Daniel is 9. Amie is 8. Ethan and Lexi are 25."

"How old is Ryan?"

"5 weeks."

"And you've been away a month? You must have missed your little one terribly. When they are that small they grow so quickly!"

"Yeah. I have." she sounded surprised at how much she had missed him. She hadn't noticed he wasn't there at first. She felt guilt rise. "Lexi and Ethan have 2 kids. Zoey is 2 and Ethan junior is also 5 weeks. Born on the same day." Missy pulled the pictures from her bag.

"Oh your little boy has the look of you."

Missy smiled. "I see his daddy in him."

"They are cute kids. Amie is gonna be breaking hearts when she grows up!"

"Her big sister broke a few hearts too!" Missy told her.

"You can't tell the three of them are brother and sisters. They all look so different!"

"They do." Missy agreed. "Lexi is a clone of her dad. Amie is literally the double of her mum. Daniel is a mixture of both of them."

"I see hints of Lexi in your baby. The nose. The mouth. He is adorable."

Missy looked at the picture. "I never noticed that before."

The woman beside her quieted and handed her back the pictures.

Missy returned to her nervousness and twitching. She really hoped she got back before Lexi was charged! Another worry had she was going to see Danny again. She was eager to see Ryan too but at the same time nervous. He wouldn't know her. What if she upset him? What is he seriously bawled his eyes out at the sight of her? Babies could sense stuff. What is he sensed that she was a bad mother? She couldn't bear that! What if she didn't feel anything when she held him? Or worse what if she felt the emptiness? What if she heard the voices? What if she lost her mind again? She wanted to love her little boy the way he deserved to be loved but she was stressed out! How was she supposed to relax?

She heard the someone come over the tannoy asking the passengers to put their seatbelts on as they were coming in to land.

"See dear just fine!" the woman said smiling kindly.

Missy nodded and smiled in return.

The first thing she was gonna do was get to that police station and get Lex out of there. Even if she had to break her out of there like Lex did for her. And unlike Lex she wouldn't get caught! She thought cockily. She set about making a contingency plan just incase they needed it.

**A/N ok missy forced to go back due to lexi being arrested but planning to brea her out of a prison! ony melissa! and awww I feel sorry for danny believing that missy doesn't love him anymore :(**


	71. D20 Decisions

Lexi was sat in a hot interview room. Her head ached with an unyielding intensity. Something was wrong with her chest too. She felt breathless. She had her head rested on one of her hands. Her elbow on the table. She was shattered. She'd been sat in a cell for two days, not able to sleep very well. They had grilled her for a couple of hours. It had felt like days. They just kept talking in circles expecting her to trip over herself and then confess to a litany of sins. She had chucked her solicitor out. He was well on their side. Believed everything they were saying about her. To be honest with that as her defence she was better off alone!

"Ok Alexis lets go over this again!" the burly officer said harshly.

"That's Mrs Bell to you!" she spat. She was beginning to get angry. How many more times did she have to say she knew nothing!

The burly officer glared and she smirked.

"Ok then Mrs Bell." the skinny once said softly. "We are here to help."

"Can you please just turn off the good cop bad cop routine it's frustrating me!" she hissed.

"Mrs Bell…"

"Do we have to go over all this again?" she was trying to co-operate but she was tired and grumpy, not necessarily in that order. When she felt like that her mouth started moving before her head caught up and she started being defiant and insolent.

"How did you get into the hospital?" the burly one asked.

"Through the front door." she replied monotonously.

"How?" the skinny one asked.

"I walked." she said dryly.

"How did you get in?" The burly one asked angrily.

"The usual way I used a key."

"Ok What next?"

Her patience wearing thin. "Look let me give you the condensed version. We broke in un strapped Missy from the bed and carried her out of the hospital into a car. I went back in and we realised we couldn't get out by our original route so we broke a window in the staff room. Which I stupidly sent a cheque to pay for or you would never have found me!" she exhaled. "And by the way if we hadn't of got her out when we did I would have been here as a witness to a whole other crime not that you would have listened!"

"So you believed you were justified in getting her out?" the skinny one asked.

"Yes I know I was!" she said seriously.

"Why did you go back inside?"

"I've told you all this!" she said wearily.

"Well I wanna hear it again. Just to make sure."

"Well rewind the tape. It's all on there! Listen to it to your hearts content."

"Your 5 seconds away from being charged with not co-operating!" The skinny one warned.

Lexi rubbed her face. "I needed the name of Missy's medication."

"What happened after you broke the window?"

"We drove away." Lexi told them.

"Then?"

Lexi remained quiet. Unwilling to lie but also unwilling to put Shauna in a compromising position.

"Your silence reflects poorly on your record." The skinny one said.

"I had no idea I had a record!" she said defiantly.

"You do now." The burly one said.

"Oh lucky me!"

"Cut the smart comments….Mrs Bell." the burly one told her. "Tell us where they are!" he added.

"It was a month ago. They are long gone!" she said tiredly.

"Like they haven't been in touch!" The burly one said sarcastically.

"They haven't." Lexi countered.

"Liar!"

Lexi's eyes turned black with anger. "Don't call me a liar you don't even know me! First appearances can be deceptive!"

"Shauna O'Donell." The skinny one asked.

"Is my aunt," she supplied.

"Melissa Lynch?"

"Is also my aunt." she finished.

Lexi laid her arms on the table. "I'm dead on my feet. The only response your gonna get out of me soon is snores!"

"We can keep going all night Mrs Bell!"

"Do you mind if I go to sleep then?" she asked cockily. Rested her head on her arms.

"Look tell us what we want to know and we'll make you a deal. You could still walk out of her." the skinny one promised.

"And the good cop returns. Had your coffee and donut break?"

"That option is rapidly receding. This will all be on you unless you answer us. We don't want you to take the rap alone!"

"How can I tell you something I don't know?" she yawned. "Look guys I have a 5 week old baby at home who needs his mum. I need to get back to him. So can you do what you got do or freaking charge me coz I am RAPIDLY LOSING PATIENCE!" her voice raised slightly until she was yelling at the end.

"Fine!" the skinny one said.

"Alexis Bell we are charging you….."

(X)

Missy stood outside the police station. Pulled on her sunglasses. Shielded her eyes as a sign of protection. She needed as much as she could get. She too a deep cleansing breath of air and exhaled it. Did it again. She straightened her spine and put on a arrogant superior air. Inside she was quivering. She walked up the steps into the police station. Walked to the reception desk.

"Hello." a policeman said.

"I'm here for 2 things." she said without preamble. "The first and most important is to get my niece Alexis Bell released."

He typed in the name.

"She is part of a ongoing investigation and will be released in due course." he said in a bored tone.

"So am I." Missy told him.

The policeman frowned.

"Which brings me to the second reason for me being here. I want to file a complaint against Johannesburg hospital well 2 members of staff who work there." she said calmly.

The policeman grabbed a clipboard. "Name."

"Melissa Lynch."

The policeman dropped his pen and stared at her for a second. Then he glanced at a wall. Then back at her.

She pulled off her sunglasses. Leaned into the alcove and looked at the wall he glanced at. Saw a picture taken of her a few weeks ago at leopards Den.

"Oh look, I'm famous. Am I on milk cartons too?" she said grinning.

'Missy curb the more out there statements you want them to believe you're a sane upstanding person remember!' she mentally berated herself.

"Look Miss just sit down slowly o Everything is fine." he said slowly and calmly.

He was talking to her like she was stupid. Like she was a cannon that was gonna go off. That seriously annoyed her! "The name is Melissa and don't try it. I'm perfectly normal. Perfectly sane. Been given the all clear by my doctor in Glasgow where I have been staying for the last 4 weeks! So can we get this complaint filed and my niece released from the ….." suddenly there was an almighty yell.

"You can't keep me here!"

"Lexi?" Missy asked. She recognised the voice.

"You bastards piled on a load of bogus charges!" she yelled. "I'll get every last one of you for this!"

"Let me see her I can calm her down!" Missy told him.

"Get your hands off me!" Lexi yelled voice strained.

"We have a doctor we'll…" he started.

Now way were they sedating her niece! "Look 5 minutes is all I need. She'll be calm I promise you. Just don't sedate her. Please!" she pleaded.

The policeman relented. "Ok."

She was led through 3 sets of locked doors. Lexi's ranting getting more and more obscene and angry the closer she got. She saw Lexi pulling at her arms.

"Lex what on earth are you doing?" she asked. She craned her head. "Miss?" she stopped fighting. Her eyes were glistening.

The policemen saw she had stopped fighting took their chance and flung her on the floor. The impact caused the breath to be forced from Lexi's lungs. Her head was held against the cold floor. Her arms pinned behind her back! Lexi lost her temper again and began fighting.

"Get the hell off me before I break your arm!" she yelled squirming. Legs kicking and thrashing.

"Get the doctor!" the burly one yelled.

Missy who had watched this with horror clenched her fists to stop going over and decking the policemen who was getting far to much enjoyment pinning her to the floor.

"Lexi!"

She couldn't hear her. Too focused on trying to get free.

Missy knelt down.

"Lexi. Calm down. For me please. He told me over there they'll let me talk to you if you calm down." she said softly.

Lexi looked at the cop who nodded stiffly.

"Ok I give up." Lexi went completely limp. They released her slowly in increments expecting her to get up and fight.

"Lex what were you doing?" Missy asked as Lexi was helped to her feet. She too a step forward and caressed the cheek which had been held roughly against the floor. It was dark red. She shoved her free hand in her coat pocket.

"How about we go in there. We talk and calm you down huh?"

Lexi nodded and allowed herself to be led inside the cells.

Missy stopped at the door. "Can I?"

"5 minutes." the burly one said. "And just coz you calmed her down."

Missy nodded and walked in. the door was left wide open. Missy noticed a camera in the corner. Damn!

"C'mere kid."

Lexi was in her arms. Crying silently.

"They piled on a load of false charges Miss. Assault. Drugs. You've new since the day I was born. I've never taken drugs in my life! They were rambling about amphetamines. I should kill them!"

"hey, hey." Missy said softly. "Calm down. I'm here now. I'll sort this. I promise." Somehow! She suddenly realised what she had to do. She'd deal that if the charges were dropped she'd go back willingly. She couldn't let Lex go down for this! She acted all tough but it would kill her not seeing Ethan and her kids!

"They've charged me Miss. I'm going to prison. I'll never see Ethan or Zoey or EJ for years." she sniffed.

Her heartbroken words just stiffened Missy's resolve.

"No I'm gonna get you out of here ok!" she vowed. Lowered her voice to a breath whispered in her ear. "I had a phone for you but I see there is camera's in here so you can't risk it. Sorry kid."

Lexi nodded almost imperceptibly.

Missy released her from her hug. "Sit tight. Do as your told. I've already rang a solicitor who should have been here by now!" she said angrily. "He'll try to get bail for you ok. I'm hoping it doesn't take that long. I've asked him to draw up a deal for you."

"What type of deal?" Lexi asked worriedly.

"I'm at the centre of this." Missy said finally. "If they get what they want other people are irrelevant."

"No Miss!"

"I know the doctor said he'd drop the charges if he got me back." Missy said finally.

"NO!"

"Love you kid. Remember stay calm. Co-operate or I'll scud you when I see you!" Missy grinned.

"For Gods sake Miss NO!" Lexi grabbed her wrist. "I'm not gonna let you do this!"

Missy smiled a small smile. Removed her hand. "I appreciate you trying to protect me Lex. But this is my choice." Missy kissed her cheek. "They'll sedate you if you kick off. I don't want that for you. Calm down yeah!" caressed her cheek a final time. Lowered her voice. "And beef cake is so gonna get a smack when I see him outside. He was far too rough with you!"

She left the room and they locked the cell. Lexi was frowning worriedly. She couldn't let Missy do what she planned!

"Officer I want my phone call!" Lexi yelled.

**A/N nooooooooooooooooooooo missy can not do what she has planned. if she goes bk in there she'll be stuck! will it come to that? it really really might! so does lexi rot in jail or does Miss go bk to the jo'burg mental hospital. keep reading to find out!**


	72. D21 Got You!

"Ethan it's Lex I only have a few minutes."

"Oh honey how have you been?"

"No time. Look Missy is here and is working out a deal. She is gonna go back in there as long as the charges are dropped against me!"

"She's what?" Ethan felt guilt rise. He had bullied her to come back but never expected her to do that!

"I've been thinking. Shauna is too far away to stop her. Dad, no way he sent her there in the first place. No it needs to be you. You need to come down and see her. Stop her. You have your psychologist degree. You can tell them she's fine. You can tell straight away she is normal, Cured. Whatever!"

"Lex you now I'd come down in a second but I have the kids."

"Can't you drop the kids off at dads?"

"Lex I have all the kids. Your dad dropped them off and has since went AWOL!"

"Oh for Gods sake! He's never there when he needs her!" Lexi hissed.

"One minute left." The officer said.

"How are the kids?" she asked.

"Zoey is pining for you. Ethan junior is fine. He slept through last night."

"I miss them. Give them a kiss for me will you!"

"I'll do better. Zoey mummy is on the phone!"

Zoey came on the phone. "Hello mummy."

Lexi's throat felt tight. "Hey baby."

"Home pwease mummy. Miss you."

"Soon baby I miss you too."

She heard Ethan murmur to her.

"Kisses for mummy. Mwah mwah mwah. Off all of us."

"Thanks baby. I love you and I send you flying kisses too."

Ethan came back on the phone.

"I miss you too Lex. Come home soon."

She exhaled. "I miss you too. I love you."

The officer tapped his watch.

"I gotta go Ethan my time is up.

"Bye honey I love you." he said sadly.

"Bye Ethan." put the phone down. The officer too her arm and led her to the cells.

(X)

Missy sat calmly at the visitors room. Hands clasped on the desk. She looked the vision of calmness and sanity. Her solicitor sat by her side shuffling papers.

"Your doing fine Melissa keep this up!"

"It's my business face. Took years to perfect!" she breathed.

He smiled.

Dr Jellow walked in. Jellow looked startled like he didn't expect her to be there. He had a metal case with him. She blanched slightly.

"Hello." her solicitor stood up extended his hand. "I'm representing Miss Lynch on behalf of her own solicitor who couldn't be here." he shook Jellow's hand.

Jellow placed his case on the table. "She is extremely unstable!" The doctor said opened the case and withdrew a needle.

Missy jumped up panicked. "You come near me with that and so help me I'll…." she took a deep breath, calmed herself sat down. Looked at her solicitor. "Tell him if he comes near me that needle I'll break his arm. OFF!"

"My client wishes you only address me. And put the needle down sir." he said coolly.

Dr Jellow glared. Missy smiled at him smugly.

The solicitor pulled various letters from his case and handed them to Dr Jellow. "As you can see my client had a letter from her doctor in Glasgow stating the balance of her mind has been corrected."

"How do I now this is authentic and genuine?" Jellow interjected.

"But she does realise that more tests will be needed to be run to be completely sure. She has stated that she will co-operate willingly if all charges against Alexis Bell and Shauna O'Donell are dropped."

"No." he said angrily. Not liking being thwarted.

Missy whispered in her solicitors ear.

"My client wishes to remind you that she does not have to go anywhere or have any tests done. She has been given a clean bill of health and her mental state has been declared as sound.

The doctor thought for a moment looking at Missy who looked back unblinkingly.

"For the safety of her family and the general public I will agree. I want a contract though."

The lawyer pulled out a statement. Missy looked it over and nodded. Her solicitor handed it to Dr Jellow who also read over it and signed it. Handed to Missy who exhaled when she saw his scrawl and added her own.

"I'll go to the police and tell them to bring a statement saying you wish to drop all charges." the lawyer left leaving Jellow and Missy alone.

"Hello Melissa you are looking…well."

She crossed her arms and stared at the wall.

"Don't worry we kept your room. You'll be all better soon."

He was keeping a pretence for the camera's. He leaned in and whispered softly.

"I look forward to later. I know Clive does too!"

"Go to hell!" she spat. Went back to staring at her wall.

He smiled unconcerned by her venomous declaration.

"That's what I like about you Melissa. You have spirit. I admire your fight but I was close to breaking you last time. This time I'm gonna destroy you just coz I can!"

Missy looked him in the eye smiled cockily "You can try! The more you try to beat me the harder I come back. Nothing keeps me down. Certainly not the likes of you!"

"This is gonna be so much more fun than last time. See last time you were sick and needed help. This time your fine. Completely sane," he was still whispering. "O the joys I will have thinking up drug combo's. I know you'll prefer to have it quick. But I think I'd like to watch you lose your mind slowly. Watch your sanity trickle away as the days roll by."

"Whatever floats your boat." she said dryly.

Missy's lawyer walked back in. "Sign that Dr Jellow and it releases Mrs Bell and drops the charges against Mrs O Donell."

He again read it thoroughly. Signed it. Missy rubbed her face. He had her now she was trapped! She thought dejectedly.

Missy exhaled. "Come on Melissa." he took her arm. She resisted the urge to pull it away. "You'll be all better soon enough!"

Her face was resigned as she was led out of the visitors room. She pressed her fingers to the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes. Bye Bye life. Bye Bye sanity. Keep calm Miss. This could still end in your favour! She had to think this was gonna end well. The other option would make her spiral into despair.

"Miss?" Lexi asked.

Missy turned to face her. She was flanked either side by her solicitor and a officer. Lexi saw her face. Mostly it was the bleakness in her eyes that alerted Lexi. Lexi started shaking her head.

"I had to Lex!" she said sadly.

"NO!" she screamed. "Why Miss? We helped you. Got you out of there. You can't go back there!"

"Can I talk to my niece for a second?" Missy asked Jellow.

He shook his head happily.

"We both know that I won't be seeing her again in a long time." she exhaled. "Please," the word stuck in her throat but she forced it out.

He smiled. "Your learning Melissa." released her arm. Walked up to Lex. Her solicitor and guard backed off.

"I was ready to go down for this Miss. Me and Shauna knew the risks." Lexi told her angrily. Walking side by side.

"Well I wasn't willing to let that happen! You're a good mum Lex, better then others. Your two kids need you at home. What about Ethan? He loves and needs you too!"

"What about my dad and the kids. He'll get you outta there or I will!" she said stubbornly.

"No Lex you won't. For one no one will be able to get within a mile of me. They will have beefed up security and two I signed a contract no escapes. If you come and get me I'll go back. I gave my word Lex."

They reached the doors. "One favour Lex. Don't tell your dad I'm here huh? Tell him you were bailed. I can't see him right now."

Lexi nodded and hugged Miss. "Take care of yourself Miss. And you!" She turned to Jellow. "I'll get you if you hurt her. And the same goes for Cl…"

Missy elbowed her and shoo her head the walked beside Jellow.

"I got you now and this time you won't get away!" he whispered softly in her ear.

"Don't count on it!" she said cockily back at him. "Right Mr Byrne. Thank you." she shook his hand. "If you'll phone that private hospital we discussed."

"No private hospital. You come with me!" Jellow said arrogantly.

"Nowhere in that contract did I agree to go anywhere with you. Read the small print!" thrust her copy at his chest. Grinned sneakily. "Like I'd agree to go anywhere with you and you needle happy cronies. You messed with the wrong person!"

Lexi's mouth dropped open. A large grin spread across her face.

Missy winked at her. "You should know by now I had something up my sleeve. You can't beat me. All I'll need is preliminary tests I'll be home in a hour or two." she promised.

She got you bad!" Lexi gloated at Jellow's irate face he was searching the contract for a flaw.

"And for my piers des resistance." she said in a flawless accent.

A police officer stepped towards Jellow. "We need to talk to you about a number if allegations made against your hospital and specifically your conduct."

Jellow looked at Missy. She grinned at him. "I got you!" she gloated. "And it's all on tape too. In the infirmary. I told them everything."

Jellow paled. He hadn't destroyed that tape. It was in the machine! He lunged at her the police grabbed him. Missy simply laughed and waved as he was led away.

"I don't know what to say Miss." Lexi said.

"How about Miss you are a genius!"

Lexi grinned.

A car pulled up outside. "Go home to your husband and kids Lex. And remember don't tell your dad. I wanna surprise him!"

Lex nodded. "It's good to have you home where you belong Miss. Wait til you see Ryan he's proper stunning! Gorgeous!"

Missy nodded. "See you soon kid!"

"You know I'm 26 why do you still call me kid?" Lexi grumbled.

Missy shrugged and followed a nurse outside into the car. She looked back at Lexi and saw a statement in her eyes.

'Missy is back!'

It seemed her trying to be normal act was working then!

**A/N a few quick tests and miss can go home yay! bt how long will all this happiness last? forever? errr maybe**


	73. D22 Heartbreak

**Eminem - Space Bound (I know I wasn't doing this for this story but I just thought it really fit.)**

_And I would've done anything for you  
__To show you how much I adored you  
__But its over now  
__Its too late to save our love_

(X)

Danny sat in Fatani's bar. His head full of Missy. He knew he was drunk. He'd only planned to have one then only had turned into two, two had morphed into eight and now he was feeling decidedly wobbly. He knew it was a really bad idea for him to get drunk but he was too wobbly to remember why. He was sat looking at his favourite picture on his phone. His arms around Missy's waist his chin rested on her shoulder. They were smiling at the camera. So in love. He slammed his phone down screen first onto the table.

"You ok Danny?" Fatani asked.

He shrugged. "Could be better. Have been a lot better!" he admitted. He exhaled sadly.

A woman was sat across from him. He recognised her. Amie was friends with her daughter. It was Vanessa. She looked at him and smiled although it didn't reach her eyes.

"Where's Rowan?" he asked.

"We're on a break. We've been arguing a lot!"

Danny nodded. "So you come to drown your sorrows huh?"

"Yeah it's no fun at home alone!"

He nodded again.

"You drowning your sorrows too?" she asked.

"And trying to mend a broken heart. It sure ain't working."

"Your wife's friend Melissa?"

He exhaled. "Yeah. She don't love me anymore."

"I can't see that." she told him softly.

He looked at her eyebrows raised. "Well I wouldn't mind a few arguments as long as we made up afterwards." he murmured.

O God the alcohol was making him talk gibberish shut your mouth Danny!

Vanessa beamed at him.

"If she's gonna leave you then you should forget her. Plenty of fish in the sea!"

The alcohol was talking for both of them. They were both too drunk and shouldn't be acting like this. They weren't even attracted to each other!

He pushed a strand of hair so it rested behind her ear.

She smiled.

(X)

Missy exhaled a large breath. "You can do this Miss!"

She had been discharged from the hospital no problem. Was stood at the bottom of the stairs at Leopard's Den. "Stop being a wimp!"

It was dark outside a few lights were burning inside. She walked up the stairs into the house. Straight into the living room. A pile of Ryan's clothes on the chair. A dummy on the table beside a blue rattle. A couple of new pictures added to the wall devoted to family. There were various pictures of all the kids at all the stages in their life. The family pictures which had Danny and Alice on. Along with a few shots of Danny and her. Photos of Shauna Alice and Missy too. She walked over and looked at the new pictures. One of them was all the kids. Ethan held EJ. Lexi held Zoey. Daniel and Amie had Ryan on their knees. They all smiled happily. Then there was one of Danny holding Ryan. He looked every inch the proud daddy. She felt a flicker of something in her chest as she looked at the baby. It bloomed.

"Where are you Danny?" she whispered.

She looked in their room. Saw the rumpled bed and the cot covers pulled back. The musical mobile hung.

"So they aren't in probably at Lex's."

She decided to ring his mobile eager to hear his voice.

"Hello." a unfamiliar voice asked.

"This is Missy do you know where the owner if this phone is please?"

"He's at the bathroom in Fatani's bar."

"Ok thanks. Don't tell him I called ok."

"Sure thing."

"Who am I speaking to?" she asked,

"Fatani."

"Ok, thanks Fatani."

She jogged down the steps towards the car. She'd be seeing him soon. And the first thing she wanted was a big kiss!

(X)

"Hey Fatani did Ethan or Lexi call?"

"No they didn't."

"Thanks for watching my phone. The last time I had my phone in the bathroom I dropped it down the toilet. Never again!"

He waled and sat closer to Vanessa. "So where were we?"

"Well I was just about to ask you if you were free tonight." Vanessa asked seductively.

"Really? What for?" he feigned innocence.

'Oh God Danny don't even go there. Just back right off! You and I both now that you don't wanna do this!'

'Shut up!' Danny told the sane part of his head.

"I'll leave that up to you." she purred and leaned in…..

(X)

Missy walked into Fatani's bar smiling. She had come to a few conclusions. She loved Danny and this was gonna work coz it was both what they wanted. She scanned the bar. Noticed Danny sat close to a blond. She leaned in, he met her halfway and he kissed her. She felt her breath catch. Ok Danny if this is an innocent peck pull away. Pull away NOW! She thought. She went into shock. No way she thought a hysterical laugh bubbled up into her throat. He wouldn't do this to me!

Have a good look Miss, he IS doing it to you and enjoying it too!

God this was a full on kiss. Inside she felt her heart break literally felt it shatter. Ok Miss damage limitation time. There is no freaking way he was seeing the way he hurt her. Or how much he hurt her! She swallowed thickly pasted a cocky arrogant smile on her face. She knew it didn't reach her eyes but it was the best she had at the moment.

Danny pulled away from Vanessa. From his peripheral vision he saw a woman. She stood smiling cockily, arrogantly even. Her head cocked slightly. Arms crossed tightly. He looked over and nearly swallowed his tongue in shock.

"Missy?" he squeaked. A smile spread on his face.

O God he's hurt me this much and he's smiling at me. Tears welled. She couldn't take it!

"I'm sorry Vanessa I'll see you." he said softly. Walked towards Miss who had turned and was walking out quickly. Head held high. "Miss wait!" he called.

Missy ignored Danny. Tears were there but she refused to let them fall. She cried over no man! Ever! She controlled her breathing. Don't cry! Don't cry! Was a mantra in her head but it wasn't working.

She climbed in the car determined to start it and drive away so he wouldn't see her like this. He climbed in the other side before she sped off.

"Miss I've missed you so much!" he told her seriously and went to touch her face.

"Don't talk to me Danny, or touch me!" she started the car and drove away.

"Miss…."

She pulled the car over. Looked at him. "You just kissed another woman Danny and loved every single…second of it." her voice broke at the end.

"Shauna told me you didn't love me anymore. She was wrong coz you're here!" he defended himself.

"Did **I **tell you that? How long have you known Shauna? You should know to take everything she says with a pinch of salt when she's angry!"

"Missy you didn't call me or write!"

"We were in a cabin in the middle of the woods. Sorry I couldn't find a post box between the trees and wilderness. And also we had no internet and actually phone reception was crap. Shauna could barely get through to her mum and they were in the same country!"

She started driving again swiped at a tear which rolled down her cheek.

"I needed you so much I only had our son but I needed you!"

He saw her swiping at her cheeks and realised she was crying. Oh NO this wasn't good. Especially if she was crying. Missy rarely if ever cried. Only if A she was hormonal or B seriously upset! And then she cried in private! Guilt filled every pore of his body at how he hurt her.

She was silent until they pulled into Leopards Den.

"Danny, I convinced myself that the reason why I didn't get in touch was coz I hated you for leaving me to rot in the hospital but it wasn't. I was ashamed Danny. Ryan my tiny innocent little boy and I couldn't even look at him!"

The admission cost her. She bolted from the car. He followed.

"That wasn't your fault Miss!" she was stood at the bottom of the stairs.

"Leave me alone Danny."

"We can work this out!" he told her.

She spun. "How long has this went on Danny?"

"It was just tonight." he told her sincerely.

"Liar! Were you seeing her while I was away. Or while I was still here? Is that why you had me locked away? So you could build a little love nest here?" she spat.

"No Miss."

"Were you gonna tell people Ryan is hers coz I'm such a bad mother?" More tears fell. She wiped her eyes.

"God Miss I'd never do that to you. I love you!" he promised.

"Don't lie to me Danny. I love you so much and you cheated on me. God how stupid am I? I never even looked at someone else!"

"It was just a kiss!" he stressed to her.

"I don't believe you it was a willing kiss. She didn't drag you did she?"

In his drunken haze his anger rose.

"Look Danny if you don't wanna be with me fair enough!" she told him seriously.

"I don't wanna be with her. I want you!" his teeth clenched.

"How could you do this to me Danny?"

"What?" his anger exploded and she jumped back in fright. Looked at him open mouthed. He actually scared her there! "You leave me alone to care for our newborn son. For 4 weeks. How could I do that to you? You didn't call you could have been dead for all I knew!" he yelled.

"The way you wanted so you and Vanessa could play happy families with my son!" she spat back. When scared she reacted in anger.

He took a step forward and she swallowed thickly. "O he's your now. This from the woman who said he was switched at birth! Heard voices telling her to harm him! Didn't even ask how he was. He's better off without you!" he spat. Then clapped a hand over his mouth eyes wide.

Missy stood frozen to the spot. His words echoed through her brain.

"Miss…" he said softly. "I didn't mean that." too a step towards her. "I was angry and hurt…."

"Your right." she whispered. "He deserves better than me. I just never truly believed it til now." she exhaled a shay breath. "Thank you Danny you just made everything so much clearer!"

She jogged up the stars to her house. Into hers, sorry Danny's room.

Danny followed slowly. He hurt her so badly there and there was no excuse for it. God he didn't want to hurt her for anything he loved her, he walked into their room.

"Miss…what are you doing?"

"I give up my parental rights Danny. I'll have my solicitor sort the forms and I'll mail them to you. You can…have Ryan." her voice broke and tears fell.

She put her clothes in a suitcase.

"Miss he needs you."

"To hurt him? To doubt him? He doesn't need that Danny!"

"You're his mum!"

"I know and it kills me knowing what I did. I could deal with it when everyone around me could. I didn't now how you truly felt. Now I know I can't stay. He's safer with you."

"He needs both of us!" he countered.

"Why? So you can throw it in my face and make me cry? I hate crying and I refuse to cry over you!" she turned her back. Shoulders shaking.

He came up behind her and he wrapped his arms around her. She fought.

"I'm so sorry Miss!"

"Let me go!" she cried.

"I told you Miss. I'm a hard person to love."

"How could you say that to me Danny? I felt something! I finally felt something for him and you extinguished it! I don't know again. It was so fragile!"

She wasn't fighting anymore just crying silently. He spun her. She didn't hug him back arms hung limply at her sides.

"Miss it's late we'll talk in the morning then go collect Ryan from Ethan's. Lexi has been arrested though!" he said sadly.

"I sorted it already she's home. All charges dropped."

He grinned. "Really?"

"Yes really. I wouldn't leave her to rot in there!" he heard the accusation in her tone. The silent like you left me at the end.

She pulled away roughly. "Goodnight Danny.

"Night Miss."

She left the room. He heard a door close across the hall.

**A/N i just wanna apologise in advance for the following angst. including this chapter. it was actually supposed to be the end and i promised cloloveswah a cute danice chapter at the end but i'm in no shape to be writing fluff atm. the only thing i can write is angst soooooo... my apologies x**


	74. D23 Self Respect

Morning came quickly. Missy hadn't slept well. Nightmares had plagued her. Fragmented images. Alice. Ryan. Her mum and dad. She gave up on sleep at 3 so she was tired, and angry. Not a good combination at the best of times. Add heartbroken to the mix and she was feeling dangerous! She walked robotically to the coffee maker. Turned it on. Liquid gold. Brew you little beauty! Rang Lexi's house.

"Hey Lex your dad is still in bed but we'll be over soon to get the kids."

"Sure thing Miss I'll make sure they are ready. I bet dad was thrilled with your surprise!"

"Thrilled isn't the word I'd use. But he sure was surprised Lex."

"Huh?"

"Nothing Lex ignore me I'm tired!"

"Far too much info there Miss!" Lexi laughed.

"haha." she again said dryly.

"You ok Miss? You don't sound ok." Lexi said worriedly.

"I'm good Lex we'll talk later yeah. See you." put the phone down before more conversation could follow.

She knocked on Danny's bedroom door.

No answer.

Knocked again. Then walked inside. He was on his back dead to the world. The blanket covered his waist and legs leaving his chest bare. She saw the scar high on his neck. Exhaled.

"Danny." she said loudly.

No response. Usually a whisper and he'd be awake.

"Danny!" she repeated.

He turned over and mumbled some gibberish.

She walked over and shook him. "Danny!" she repeated. "We have to go get the kids. Ryan."

He opened his eyes and smiled at her. Her heart froze for a second and she found herself falling into moss green eyes. God his eyes should come with a health warning especially when he smiled!

"What's that?" he asked pointed at her head.

"What?" she asked.

He sat up. "C'mere let me get it!"

She patted her head. "I've got it!"

"No." he stood up. "I'll get it." he cupped her face and kissed her so tenderly it stole all the breath from her body. It made her legs weak, she would have fell if he hadn't been holding her up. He didn't feel any resistance so he deepened the kiss. He had her ultimate surrender. He groaned and pulled away. Hugged her tightly.

"What on earth did you do that for?" she asked and pulled from his loving embrace.

"What? Kiss you? Seemed like a good idea at the time. Seems like a good idea now!" he admitted and grinned.

"Well you shouldn't of!" she said still breathing heavily.

He grinned. "Like you were stopping me. You kissed me back whole heartedly."

He went to caress her face but she batted his hand away. Huffed and crossed her arms. "You caught me off guard!"

"So you will stop me if you see it coming?"

She glared at him. He took her challenge.

"Miss I'm gonna kiss you now!"

"No your not!" she replied backing off.

He smiled cockily. "O but I am!"

He moved quickly and gathered her in his arms. Before she could protest her pressed his lips to her in a no holds barred, toe curling spine tingling kiss. It was full of heat and barely restrained passion. Against her will her arms twined around his neck and she cursed her bodies traitorous response to him. Her pushed her back against a wall and his hands were skimming the length of her body. He had to pull away now before he did something really stupid like remove their clothes. Coz although she seemed to be enjoying herself she would hate him if he took advantage of her this way. She wasn't ready for this and it would be a mistake. A very nice mistake but a mistake none the less! God his whole body ached with how much he wanted her. Even his hair ached!

He backed away quickly. Put his hands behind his back to stop himself reaching her for.

"That is the second time I've put a stop to something you don't seem to want Miss. You are as caught up as me and don't try to deny it. Coz if I have to disprove it again I'm not sure I have the restraint to stop!" he warned.

"I hate you!"

"O yeah I can tell. The hate was just flowing through the kiss Miss." he grinned.

"You are such a…a… a man!" she hissed

"Thank you I am extremely relieved that you noticed."

"Danny stop being funny. I am so NOT in the mood. Coffees on I need to change!"

"Oh a strip tease. As much as I would love to indulge We can't. we have the kids to collect!"

"DANNY! Your not funny!" she yelled. "I don't know why but you have your happy head on but I'm not happy ok!"

"I'm happy your back." he said softly.

"Yeah well did you catch me kissing another man - no. Did I tell you your son is better off without you - no. Did you have the worst nights sleep of your entire life? - obviously not!"

She walked from the room and slammed the door.

"Ok Danster no to humour. She obviously isn't in the mood. Try a different tack. But what?"

Danny showered and dressed in record time. It had been the sight of her stood over him. Her face had warned him but her eyes they had told him that she loved him. Just for a minute she had looked so normal and in that moment he had to kiss her more than he needed to breath.

He walked into the kitchen. Missy was poring over letters. It had the logo for her designs on them. He had packed all her mail away. She sipped a cup of coffee and ran her hand through her hair. Shook her head and muttered something about Melanie. She wore a lemon vest top. With three quarters cargo trousers and her hair in a twist with a clip. White trainers adorned her feet. She looked so gorgeous she stole the air from his lungs and he had to remind his body to breathe!

"Good morning Miss." he said breathlessly.

She ignored his statement. Frowned at her letters. "Mel go to hell!" she muttered shoved all the letters back in a brown envelope. "It's gonna take me a year to undo a months damage!" she muttered. She looked at him. "I phoned Lex already. She's gonna have the kids ready for us getting there."

"Can we talk?" he asked.

"I agree we need to talk."

That SO didn't sound good. Not the way she said it anyway he thought.

"I'll go first." he volunteered. Exhaled. "I do love you."

"That's debateable!" she muttered dryly.

"Missy don't be like this eh? I'm trying to talk about my feelings with you which isn't easy at the best of times as you know. Sarky comments I can do without!"

She had a bored look on her face. Shrugged. "Carry on."

He opened his mouth. "Dammit Miss I lost my train on thought now!"

"Poor you. Is it my turn yet?"

"Give me a minute!" he asked.

She nodded. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah shoot." he replied.

"Don't tempt me!" she murmured.

He smiled. His smiled faded at the next words out of her mouth.

"Did you ever cheat on Alice?" she asked seriously.

"What the hell?" he asked angrily. "You have no right asking me that!"

"I have every right. Did you EVER cheat on my best friend? And your reply so better be no!" she warned coldly.

"No I didn't. Not ever. It never entered my head!"

She scrutinised him. "I believe you."

"Miss about what I said and done…"

She opened her mouth.

"You promised no sarky comments."

"I made no such promise!" she retorted.

He exhaled.

"I won't." she relented.

"Look Shauna told me yesterday when I rang you that you didn't want me anymore."

She opened her mouth and he put his hand up to silence her. "I know you didn't tell me that but I believed her. It didn't hurt any less hearing it from her. How could I not believe her given the fact that you cut all contact with me? God it hurt Miss." he quieted. "Anything to say?"

She shook her head.

"So I went to Fatani's to drown my sorrows. To forget you. I know better that to drink when upset but I had to. I missed you! And Vanessa was there."

Missy's face darkened.

"She was upset too. She had split with Rowan and we comforted each other."

Missy bit her tongue. So that's what he called it. She called it kissing someone else!

"Nothing happened before that and nothing will happen after either." he promised.

"Don't count all your chickens before they hatch!" she warned.

"Huh?"

"Don't discount a relationship with Vanessa so quickly Danny."

"I don't have one with her nor do I want one."

"That is NOT what I saw last night. Would you have went home with her Danny?" she asked.

"Honestly I have no idea!"

"Well at least you didn't lie."

"You know if you had been here this would never have happened."

"OH so you kissing someone else is MY fault?" she fumed.

"No but…"

"You considering going home with another woman is MY fault?" she carried on.

"Of course not."

"See there you go. Making more false statements."

"Your twisting my words Miss making to sound like I planned it. I wouldn't do that to you." he told her exasperated.

"You'll do it when I'm gone though?"

"It was one little kiss Miss."

"You admit that the potential was there for more! And why should I put up with one kiss? Just because it wasn't sexual I should just turn around and forget it? Condone it? No way Danny!"

"Of course not but…"

"Exactly Danny!"

"Your not willing to listen. Say what you wanna say." he said defeated.

"How are we gonna sort this?" she asked.

"Sort what?"

"The kids."

"You've lost me Miss."

She exhaled. "I dunno if I can live with you. It hurts to look at you."

"So your moving out?" she squeaked.

"It's the best idea. I'm just wondering about Ryan, Daniel and Amie."

He frowned.

"O is that frown about Daniel and Amie. I'm not abandoning them Danny!" she said passionately.

"No it's not that. I want you to stay. I don't want you halfway across Africa. You belong here with us. In your home!"

"This isn't my home Daniel. You brought another woman into the relationship and I don't share. I need to move on and get over you."

"No you don't you love me!" he told her softly.

"I do NEED to get over you. To prove I can!"

"So everything we have. You just gonna throw it away? For what?"

"Danny. One of the things I used to pride myself on was the fact that I took no crap from anyone! There's a lot of stuff I can tolerate if I love someone enough but cheating isn't one of them I have far to much hard earned self respect to throw it away for any man. Even you. I'm getting back to that place inside myself where I'm completely comfortable in myself as a person. It's being rebuilt slowly if I tell myself to forget what you did then it will slowly eat away at my self respect coz I'll always wonder if you'll do it again. Whether I'm good enough."

Danny understood. He hated it but understood. "So we aren't saveable at all?" he asked.

"No we aren't. I'll be staying at Jo'burg coz the kids need me. I'm not willing to take Ryan away from his brothers and sister and most importantly you."

Danny nodded. "We'll go collect the kids then."

**A/N again i apologise for all the angst i was so down wen i wrote this and i'm nt feelin better yet tbh :( sorry x**


	75. D24 Arguments

Danny and Missy drove to Lexi's. They sat in a uncomfortable silence. It had never been like this. The old camaderie they used to share was gone.

"When you going?" he asked softly.

"As soon as possible. It's best the kids don't get used to me being around again. It would be harder for me to go then."

"Why not hang around for a week? Get used to Ryan's routine?" he suggested.

"That's a good idea." she agreed.

He nodded. They arrived at mini Leopards Den. The kids were sat on the veranda.

"Look Missy is in the car!" Amie yelped and jumped up.

Missy smiled and waved. Daniel and Amie ran towards the car. They dived on Miss before she was even out of the car. They pushed each other trying to hug her. She grinned widely.

"Hey kids nice welcome. With this type of devotion it's a wonder I ever left!"

"Lexi said dad had a surprise for us." Amie said hopping in excitement. "I thought it was a lion cub or something."

"And you got me instead. Sorry kids."

"Your way better!" Daniel said with a shy smile. She ruffled his hair.

Ethan and Lexi had heard the commotion and they appeared at the door holding the two baby boys. "Hey Lex, Eth."

"Hello Miss you look well." Ethan said bouncing EJ."

"Very diplomatically said Ethan."

"I thought so." he grinned.

"What you meant to say is I'm not a lunatic anymore." she stated for him.

He looked uncomfortable.

"I'm joking Ethan. Did everyone lose their sense of humour when I was gone?"

"Shauna is angry about what you did!" Lexi declared grinning ignoring her sense of humour statement.

Missy shook her head and waved a dismissive hand. "Shauna is never happy. She's probably angry that I thought of it and not her!"

Danny frowned and looked at Missy. "What happened?"

"Nothing Danny." Missy told him.

"I'll call you later Dad." Lexi told him. 'Little ears.' she mouthed.

"Ryan's here." Lexi said smiling down at him. Missy peeked over. Danny walked over and took him. "Hello baby." he murmured.

"He's been no bother dad. Slept through unlike junior here who's as noisy as daddy!"

"You love me so don't complain." Ethan told her.

Lexi smiled at Ethan lovingly and they shared a moment. Ethan put his arm around Lexi's waist. She rested her head on his shoulder for a second.

"And little madam is still in bed. We couldn't get her to go to sleep last night. She really had missed me. And here I thought she was a daddies girl."

Danny walked towards her. "It is good to have you home Lex."

"By the skin of our teeth though eh Miss?"

"Yeah." Missy smiled a little. Looked at the kids. "So what you been up to since I've been gone?"

"Daniel has a girlfriend!" Amie declared needling Daniel.

"Do not!" he declared blushing slightly.

"You do! She came over and had tea. They spent all the time together."

"We had a school project Miss." Daniel glared at Amie.

"You held her hand! And you kissed her!" She smiled sneakily. "I saw you." Amie made kissy noises.

Daniels face turned red with anger. Amie looked around realised she had pushed Daniel too far and ran for it.

"Wait til I catch you!" He yelled chasing her.

"Has he got a girlfriend?" Missy asked.

"Not according to him but yeah it looks like it."

Missy frowned. "I have the biggest urge to find this girl and tell her if she hurts Daniel or messes him around in any way she answers to me. And she's only 10!" Missy groaned.

"11 actually. Seems Daniel likes older women! It's a girl in his class. She's nice. Shy though."

Missy covered her face.

"Older is actually worse. And the shy quiet ones. You have to watch them!"

Danny chuckled.

Missy looked at Ryan in his arms. Saw her own eyes. Danny's shape face nose and mouth. Wow he's gorgeous was the only thought in her head. She tentatively reached for his hand. He grasped her finger as she touched his tiny fingers he eyes latched onto hers and he looked at her solemn and intense.

"Wow." she looked at Danny. "He inherited that face from you. It's your concentrating face. Its eerie how much he resembles you even with the brown eyes."

Danny grinned. "You're your father's son aren't you Ry?"

"Yeah he is. I see others in him though." she commented her gaze never leaving Ryan.

Lexi looked at her dad smiling. Nodded.

"You wanna hold him Miss?" Danny asked.

Her smile froze and fell. She looked up at Danny. The words he said raced through her mind. "No Danny."

She gently removed her finger from Ryan's grasp and walked up to Lexi.

"Little Ethan is getting big." Missy commented at the baby in Ethan's arms. "Still looks like you!" She said to Ethan in disgust.

"There's less than 12 hours between them but EJ is massive compared to Ryan." Lexi commented.

Missy smiled. "Both my parents were tiny. I'm some sort of genetic anomaly by them. A freak. All my family. Grandparents, aunts and uncles all on the short end of 5 foot. Me I'm nearly 6. I bet I'm adopted!" she said jokingly.

"Na Miss I've seen your sisters. They are the double of you. As well as your mum!" Ethan declared.

"Hey have you been checking out my family behind my back? Remember your mine if you and Lex ever split!" she said in mock seriousness.

"Don't worry Miss I haven't forgot. Unfortunately for you Lex has me forever." he kissed Lexi softly.

"My poor broken heart." Missy said dramatically with a grin.

"Sorry Miss but I don't share!" Lex told her.

"Little secret Lex neither do I!" she shot a look at Danny. "And if the man in your life doesn't understand that then they can jog on!" Missy looked at Ethan. "I didn't mean you'd cheat I just had a relationship where I was cheated on. I loved him but let him go."

"Yeah I remember you told me when I was 18." Lexi said. "You walked away coz you said you respected yourself too much to put up with it."

"And if you don't have self respect you don't have a lot!" Missy added.

"Mummy daddy!" a little voice said.

Ethan released Lexi's waist. "I'll get her. Zo Zo we're out here baby." he called.

"Daddy me firsty."

"I'll sort you some milk."

"Orange euice." she said toddling away.

Missy nodded towards the door. "She knows her own mind."

"Stubborn about it too!" Lexi added.

"Reminds me of another little girl say 25 years ago." Missy told her.

Lexi grinned. "In that department she's the perfect combination of both of us. She has her dad's patience but when she hit's the end of her tether she's like me. I have some sort of hair trigger." she was alluding to the day with Amie. The day Missy was taken away. Lexi looked at her dad. "Look dad can me and Missy have a minute."

"I'll go find the kids." he mentioned.

"Head towards the trees." Missy suggested. "Daniel has no doubt strung Amie up by her toes."

Lexi and Danny laughed. He walked away murmured to Ryan.

(X)

Lexi sat down on her step on the veranda. "Miss about what happened… what I said….what I wanted to do."

"You don't have to do this Lex. It's mostly blurry anyway." sat beside her.

"Still I would have started and you would have killed me."

Missy exhaled knowing that she would have just kept going until she made Lexi stay down. The thought made her ashamed. "Lex I wasn't me. I don't blame you. Although I do owe you a smack in the mouth!"

Lexi smiled. "I know you wouldn't threaten them Miss."

Missy's face turned guilty. "I can't believe I threatened her in the first place!"

"You wouldn't have done it Miss!"

"Lex I'm here to care for them I'm not exactly doing the best job am I?"

"Your not born knowing how to care for kids, it's something you learn and personally I think your doing a fantastic job with Daniel and Amie. You don't try to replace mum."

"No one could." Missy interjected. "They missed so much not being with her longer."

"See that's what I mean Miss. You get what mum means to them and how much we meant to her. Plus you have this great wealth of information about her. You probably know stuff even dad doesn't know. Share that with them Miss. But anyway like I said you don't try to replace her you don't act like a step mum or even an aunt. You act like my big sister or like a best friend. Confidante."

"I didn't even realise I just acted like me." Missy told her.

"Well what your doing is right. They love you to bits Miss. And Amie can I give you a word of advice? She is acting like I did when Daniel was born. We thought dad wasn't my dad so I pushed him away. She's doing the same thing with you coz Ryan's here. Her eye's never left you when she saw you there. She thinks now Ryan is here you won't love her anymore. Give her a little time she's stubborn but she'll get there."

"I have a few ideas. I knew how to deal with your mum remember."

"You'll get there with Ryan too." Lexi added.

Missy crossed her arms and dropped her head. She felt so confident at times then words would ambush her and that confidence would just disappear. She hated insecurity!

"What's the matter miss?"

"Nothing." She answered quickly.

"You can tell me." Lexi pressed.

"I can't Lex." covered her face with her hands. "I wish your mum was here!" came out muffled.

"You and dad having problems?" Lexi asked softly.

"Don't worry about it Lex.""He didn't want to leave you there you know."

"It isn't that Lex. At first I DID need to be there. And they used drugs to control me. I don't blame him. He had Ryan to think of and he saw what he needed to see to believe."

"What else could it be then?"

Missy looked at her. "Nothing I'm gonna tell you."Lexi looked hurt.

Missy put her arm around her. "Look kid he's your dad and I'm your aunt I'm not gonna tell you anything that might out you in a awkward position. I don't want you taking a side. Nothing but hurt will come of it. Plus it's best you don't know."

Lexi frowned at her. "Your leaving aren't you?"

"Not Africa but Leopards Den yeah."

"Ryan?" Lexi asked coldly.

She exhaled. "He's better off with your dad."

"Who told you that…..he didn't!" Lexi hissed.

"No Lex he didn't. I just don't know Ryan and he does." Missy lied smoothly. She didn't want Lexi thinking ill of her dad.

"What then?" Lexi asked.

"The time apart made me realise that we aren't good together that's all." Missy's told her.

"The way dad pined for you? No way!" Lexi declared.

Missy knew there was no pining of any kind! "I'll still be around Lex. For the kids and you."

Lexi was angry. "Your gonna break his heart Miss!"

Missy exhaled. He'd already broken hers. Plus you couldn't break something that you didn't have! "I've got to do this!"

"Your hurting him coz he put you away?" Lexi's anger was rising.

Missy didn't like being the target of Lexi's anger but it was better than father and daughter falling out. He had always been perfect to her and Missy refused to take that image away from her. "It's a mutual decision Lex."

"Well he wouldn't make you stay if you didn't want to!"

Missy put her head in her hands. "This isn't easy for me Lex."

"Don't do it then!" Lexi retorted.

"I have to!" Missy said muffled.

This was going far worse then Missy expected she hated pissing Lexi off but what else could she do? Tell her the truth. Now that isn't an option!

**A/N :( Lexi Missy Danny :( Nothing is going right :(**


	76. D25 Talking

Footsteps approached. Danny and the kids walked around the corner.

"What up? It's quiet. Miss you ok?" Danny asked at the sight of her face covered by her hands.

She jumped up. "Yeah I am." walked over to the car. "See ya Lex." climbed in.

Lexi didn't answer her. "Lex?" he asked. "I'll call you dad." her eyes flickered to the kids. "Miss told me everything." she whispered and walked into the house.

He paled. "C'mon kids. Time to get in the car."

He glanced at Missy who was sat looking straight ahead boring holes in a tree. So Lexi knew. She just had to dig the knife in didn't she! No wonder Lex wouldn't talk to him. God knew what was going on in her mind! He was seething! He placed Ryan in his car seat and belted it ensuring it was secure. Amie and Daniel were seated at either side of him. You could cut the tension in the car with a knife! Danny climbed in the car and started the motor forcibly. Missy rolled her eyes. He shot a glance at her. "Anything to say? Complaints?" he whispered.

"None at all." she whispered back darkly.

"Dad you ok?" Daniel asked.

"Yeah son. I'm freaking fantastic!" he replied.

"Sorry I opened my mouth!" Daniel retorted darkly. "I'll try not to breath!"

Danny exhaled. "Sorry son."

Daniel ignored his father.

Missy looked in the rear view mirror and watched the kids. Daniel had his arms crossed and was looking out of the window. The look on his face angry. Amie was singing to a cooing Ryan. She rattled his rattle above him. His eyes were fixed on the noise.

"Your grab it." Amie put his hand around the rattle and shook it gently with him. "Now rattle, rattle rattle." Amie grinned at Ryan. "See your getting it!"

Missy smiled softly at her interactions with Ryan. She mothered him something rotten obviously. Missy guessed she enjoyed not being the youngest anymore.

"He's really clever Miss. You can tell when he looks at you. It's like when he's staring he's memorising everything. He's gonna be cleverer than Daniel!"

Missy winced at the word cleverer. God say more clever child!

"And dad too!" Amie carried on. "Not mum though coz mum knew everything but he doesn't mind being slightly less clever than my mum. Do you Ry?" she asked in a singsong voice.

"No he doesn't Amie." Missy told her softly.

Amie nodded happily and looked at Ryan. "My mum looks after you. Like she does all of us. Nothing really bad will happen coz she keeps us safe. Sometimes little bad things happen like your mum getting taken away but mum told me that sometimes bad things do have to happen so you appreciate the good things that you have. And she promised me that your mum would come back and then she would stay forever coz she loves all of us." Amie told Ryan softly. "My mum was the best. I wish you could have met her but she's in heaven now and I miss her but she visits me in my dreams and I know she'll never leave me." Amie quieted played with Ryan's hand.

"She'd be well proud of both of you. Remember that."

"I know." Amie said with a exhaled breath. "I just wish she was here. To hug, to talk to." Amie whispered.

"I know what you mean Ames." Missy also whispered. They shared a sad look in the rear view mirror.

The car pulled to a stop. "Can I talk to you Miss?" Danny said stiffly.

Missy looked at him. "No." she said simply dismissing him and exited the car.

He exhaled angrily. Got Ryan from his car seat and approached the house. Missy sat on the veranda. Her head back against the wall eyes closed.

"You had to tell her!" he spat.

Missy jumped opened her eyes. "What?" she asked.

"Lexi said you told her everything. Thank you now my daughter hates me!"

"Danny…" Missy started.

"Oh no! Don't give me any excuses. I hurt you so you hurt me in return!"

"Whatever Danny." she said unwilling to let this argument continue. She was too tired. She leaned her head back again and closed her eyes. "You need to learn to listen to me!"

"What does that mean?" he asked.

"You'll see. Later."

He exhaled noisily. They walked into the hose. He fed and changed Ryan. Sat him in his bouncer and sorted thought the invoices for the hospital. The phone rang.

"Leopards Den. Daniel Trevanion." he said in monotone.

"Dad it's Lex."

"Hello Lexi."

"I hear Missy is leaving." she said dryly.

"It's all my fault." he conceded.

"No dad it's not. It's her problem not yours."

Danny was stunned. "What?"

"Yeah. She has the problem. She needs to grow up!"

"Lex you have lost me. What exactly did she say to you?"

"That you both decided that you were better off apart. I knew it was a lie coz I saw how much you missed her. I told her the reason she was leaving coz you locked her away and she wanted revenge. She didn't deny it so I figured it was true. Don't worry about it dad. You have us it'll get better!"

"Oh Lex you have it all wrong!"

"I don't think so dad."

"Lex this is all my…" he heard the dial tone and looked up.

Missy stood there looking angry. Had the button pressed down to end the call. "If I wanted her to know I would have told her!" she hissed.

"Why did you stop me?"

"What good does her knowing do? None at all except change the way she looks at you and maybe even feel sorry for me. I can do without it thanks. Mostly I didn't tell her coz you are her dad and she loves you. I'd rather have her going off on me then off at you."

"But she….she's so angry at you." he said softly.

Missy shrugged. "I'm used to people being angry at me. People looking at me like I'm different and nasty it doesn't bother me anymore. I grew up finally."

Her words echoed the sentiment Lexi had expressed moments before.

Missy knelt by Ryan's' bouncer. Touched his face softly. "How were the 4 weeks?" she asked.

"They were good, he grew up quickly. Out of his newborn clothes a few days after you left. His brown eyes appeared about the same time too. He'll need to be put up in the next baby milk coz the one he has isn't filling him. He feeds nearly every hour."

She smiled proudly. "Growing boy. When Ethan was a teenager Alice said to say he nearly ate you out of house and home."

"He's due another feed soon. Do you wanna do it?"

Her face turned pensive. "I dunno."

"You'll be fine. You fed him before."

"I didn't care then. What if those feelings come back? At least now I can look at him!"

"You'll be fine Miss really."

She exhaled. "I'll go sort his bottle."

She walked away. Danny smiled. "Mummy's back son." he murmured and got back to his work.

An hour passed and Ryan began to grizzle. His bottle was cool and ready

Missy was sat in the living room. Danny carried him over. She looked nervous. "He's not gonna bite Miss. Even if he did it wouldn't hurt. He hasn't got teeth!"

"But what if I do it wrong?"

"God Miss you have fed babies before. Not much can go wrong to be honest!"

She shook the bottle and checked it on her wrist. Danny placed Ryan on her arms. She nudged his cheek softly with the teat of the bottle encouraging him to search. His mouth moved instantly and he latched on.

"He likes eye contact when he feeds." Danny whispered.

Missy nodded and looked down at Ryan. She smiled at him. Stopped feeding halfway through to wind him. Then lay him back down to finish. Unknowingly she was rocking him slightly and hummed. Danny smiled.

"I just need to leave for a minute. Will you…"

Missy nodded and waved her free hand at him. He left.

"Wow you are hungry aren't you? It's the best way eating it all up. You'll grow up big and strong then like your brothers Ethan and Daniel. Like your daddy too."

The bottle was nearly empty.

"Your gonna be sucking on air soon. We can't let that happen. You'll get the hiccups." A second later. "All gone. Such a big boy." she murmured and sat him up gently. Rubbed his back quickly. She rested him against her stomach. Bent over and kissed his head. Inhaled his baby scent as she did. "I missed you, but mummy is here. I won't leave you again."

She then lay him on her knee and played with him a little. Then rocked her knees slightly as he yawned tiredly. The motion lulled him to sleep. Missy finally looked up and saw Danny grinning at her from the doorway. She'd be so engrossed in Ryan she hadn't noticed him.

She frowned. "How long you been there?"

"Long enough to see that your amazing with him!"

She picked Ryan up supporting his head automatically. Handed him to Danny.

"I'd rather you didn't lie to me Danny. Excuse me I need to call Shauna." she pulled her phone out as she walked away and dialled a number.

"Shauna's Orthodontist. Screams and squeals. First tooth free. Head torturer sorry dentist Shauna speaking."

"Shauna it's Missy." was all the encouragement Shauna needed.

"Missy why the hell haven't you called before now? Lexi told me what you did! Are you out of your mind? What if your plan hadn't worked huh? You would have been dragged back there kicking and screaming! Where can I add that chuckles the evil clown was waiting for you!"

"Thanks for the colourful analogy Shauns but crisis averted Lex is home. You are no longer a wanted woman and I have been declared sane. Well as sane as I can be for me." she added. "Was the circus any good?"

"Amazing til I got home and found you gone! The air turned blue! I'm surprised your ears didn't spontaneously combust! Anyway we are getting off subject."

"Lex acted all tough but she was in bits Shauna AND even if she had been fine I still wouldn't have let her go through with it. Not for me, I'm the older adult I need to take care of her you know?"

"And me?" Shauna asked.

"Oh I would have left you to rot. No doubt!" Missy said seriously.

"Liar." Shauna retorted.

"You know me well my friend."

"He could have too you back there!" Shauna said seriously.

"It was a price I was willing to pay." Missy told her simply.

"How's my gorgeous Ryan?" Shauna asked.

"Better off without me." she muttered then breezily. "He's good."

"What did you say first?" Shauna asked.

"I forgot you had hearing like a bat."

"What is it Miss?" Shauna asked softly. In the same coaxing voice she used with her daughters.

"Look Shay just ignore me yeah." she walked down the steps. "I'm just a little depressed. Me and Danny have split up."

"NO way!" Shauna declared. "I know I sorta pushed you to not go back bit that was only coz I wanted you to know you had other options. Like he wasn't the only way forward."

"No Shay we have. It's for the best."

"Miss tell me what else is bothering you. I'm worried I don't want you ill again."

"I've fell out with Lexi too. My life is basically going down the tubes."

"Christ you've only been there a day!" Shauna said in disbelief.

"Tell me about it!" Missy muttered in reply.

"Did you want to split up with Danny? Coz if it's making you feel this bad why not tell him you wanna have another go."

"It's the only way Shauna." sat on the veranda steps.

"Not by the way you say his name. There has got to be a way to save this. I know your still in love with him!"

"Love isn't enough in this case!" she got up and began to walk away from the house. "I caught him kissing another woman. Properly kissing her. As in lets go home kissing her…." Missy trailed off.

"I'll kill him!" Shauna said coldly. "Who does he thinks he is messing about on you! I mean he has YOU who else does he need?" she hissed.

"That's why I broke up with him."

"Your right too. We'll find you a better man Miss. Someone who worships you! You taking Ryan with you?"

"No he's better with his dad. We agreed he knows him better."

Shauna was quiet. "I have known you forever Miss and that statement is a blatant lie! You wanna tell me the truth?"

Missy exhaled. "He…he said that Ryan was…is better off without me" she said softly.

"He did WHAT? Right I'm coming over there and he is gonna pay for this. I swear on my girls that he will pay for saying that to you!" Shauna vowed.

"Shauna he's right."

"No Missy he isn't. You're a brill mum you know you are!"

"Yeah so much so that I thought he wasn't mine and heard voices in my head telling me to hurt him!"

"Miss you were ill. We've been through this a million times!"

"What if I get ill again Shauna. What if there's no one to stop me doing something stupid?"

Missy heard Shauna opening and closing drawers. "Put your passport away Shauna!" she said stubbornly.

"The doctor said you would only get ill again if you had another baby and even then you'd be monitored and intervention would happen as soon as the baby was born."

"He really hurt me Shay. Two times."

"I'm gonna get him Miss. I swear to you I will." Shauna promised.

"No Shauna it's ok."

Shauna didn't answer. She didn't want to lie to her friend so she changed the subject. "So why the fallout with Lex?"

"She wanted to know what was wrong. I refused to tell her what her dad did so she drew her own conclusions."

"You should have told her Miss. It's a lot less than he deserves."

"Why? Revenge Shay? That isn't my style and you know it. Plus I wouldn't do that to him. He loves his kids. I wouldn't use them against him like that."

"He used Ryan against you."

"Lexi loves him too. Me telling her helps no one. I don't wanna hurt him Shay I love him."

"Well more fool you Miss. He obviously doesn't love you!"

"If you tell Lex Shay I will never speak to you again. I swear on Ryan. I'm serious!" Missy told her.

"No. she should know that her dad is a scu…."

"Don't bad mouth him either Shay. Look Alice wouldn't want Lex falling out with Danny over me!"

Shauna relented knowing her statement was true. "Fine my trap is shut!"

"Thanks Shay." Missy murmured. Emotionally drained.

"Give Ryan a kiss off his auntie Shay ok. I'll try and bring the kids down next time they are off school."

"What about Amie?" Missy asked cautiously.

"As you seen they are different now, calmer. Not brats. Well less brat like." Shauna said laughing.

"I'll speak to Danny. Talk soon Shay."

"Don't believe his words Miss. Words can't hurt you!"

Missy disconnected. That was a big freaking lie. Words hurt a hell of a lot!

**A/N apologies for the lack of update. i just dnt feel very enthusiastic at the moment :( hope u enjoyed. i am trying to write fluff i promise it's just not happening atm :(**


	77. D26 Hard Work

**Later That Night**

Missy had had a full day. She'd played and talked with the kids. Caught up on what she missed with their lives. Daniel told her quietly that he did in fact have a girlfriend he had told her all about her with slight prompts and she did sound like a really nice girl and as long as she didn't hurt Daniel then Missy would have no reason to think any other way! Amie had talked and played like they were best friends, she was always asking if she was ok. Missy got the feeling she blamed herself for her getting sent away. Decided to set that right walked to her bedroom and knocked on the door.

"Hey Ames can we talk?"

"Yeah definitely. You wanna sit or a drink or something. I'll get it."

"Ames you don't have to do this you know."

"What?"

"Try and make it better by being my slave. By doing stuff for me."

Amie looked like she was going to deny it. "You got taken away coz you were angry at me didn't you?" Amie sat on her bed.

"No Ames. I was ill."

"What like a cold or something?"

"No see.." how to explain this to a nine year old. "See after Ryan was born I felt all different. It wasn't his fault. Or my own. My body just wasn't right. It made me believe things that weren't true, say and do things which I would never do if I was well."

"So it wasn't coz I tried to make you hit me or coz I destroyed your model?"

"No honestly Ames. Would auntie Miss lie to you?"

Amie shook her head.

"So stop asking me if I need anything ok." Missy said smiling.

Amie nodded.

She left the room and ran Ryan's bath. She put her hand under the hot water tap and the water flowed over her fingers. Right Amie - sorted. Danny and Lexi? No so easy! Which wasn't helped by the fact that she was seriously sleep deprived and she still had blueprints to look at. God all she wanted was to crawl into bed but seeing as she was a mother and then a boss. In that order then she had people relying on her and deadlines to meet. God she hated being the boss! But at the same time loved her little business, well her not so little business anymore. If someone had told her when she started that her business would grow so quick and her reputation would be well known she would have laughed at them. She started off simply designing rooms for friends and family who told her that she was good. That she should go all the way and start her own business. So she had. She turned the taps off. The water was warm.

(X)

"Ok Ry Ry there's your bath all done!. He was wrapped up in a big blue fluffy towel. She too him in the living room and lay him on his changing matt. Rubbed him gently. Put his nappy on quickly. Then dressed him in his pyjamas.

She then played with his hands. Tickled him. He looked at her solemnly. "You know Ryan your so much like your daddy. I'm so proud that your mine." Ran a finger down his soft cheek. "And so happy that I get this second chance to have you here with me."

"I know something that gets a smile from every kid I know. I'll do my Donald Duck expression yeah!"

Missy pressed he tongue against the bridge of her mouth and chatted to him in gibberish. He looked at her. It seemed her Donald Duck had failed!

A grin split his mouth, he smiled a big toothless grin at her and she filled up smiled back at him. "Did that make happy huh?" she whispered. She did it again moving her head from side to side as she did so. He smiled wider.

"Oh your so adorable!" she crooned.

"What is? Me?" Danny asked walking in.

"He smiled at me." Missy said with a huge grin. "It's so gorgeous!"

"Really?" he asked. He hadn't seen him smile yet.

"Yeah look." She again did her Donald duck impression. Ryan again on cue smiled. Danny melted.

"He has your smile." he whispered.

She shook her head.

"I didn't know you could do Donald Duck." he mentioned.

"O yeah I'm multi talented. I do Daffy Duck too. Listen, 'Your despicable." in a perfect tone. 'What's up doc?" as bugs bunny. "I had far too much free time as a kid." she laughed.

He smiled and held up a bottle.

"Can I feed him?" Missy asked.

It was the first time she had asked Danny to feed him so he handed the bottle over quickly.

"Mummy's the bestest." she murmured and settled him. "Although daddies are pretty good too."

Ryan was asleep before he finished his bottle. She laid him in his cot in his fathers room and snagged the baby monitor. She wished she could crawl into bed but she had work to do. She had a 5 minute shower coz she felt sweaty and grubby. Then she walked to the living room with her blue prints. Sat cross legged on the sofa. Was scribbling away.

The kids were watching TV sat on the chairs.

"You mind if I sit here?" Danny asked and pointed to the spot beside her.

She shook her head not looking up. She was in the zone, focused. Her hand flew over the page. Putting stuff in certain places. Her face always critical.

Missy looked at her work and frowned. Shook her head. "Nope all wrong." Rubbed it out. Redone it and turned it upside down.

It was fascinating watching her work. She was so absorbed. He looked at her drawings. "Wow that's really good." he murmured.

She smiled at him. He felt the smile all the way down to his toes. She looked so young with her hair curling around her shoulders. Spaghetti strap pyjama top and shorts on. "It's what I do. I have this new software I designed on my computer where I make an outline of the room and input where I want stuff and it shows me a 3D representation of the room. There are all sorts of different angles I can look at. Change colours and hues. I designed it with a software editor. There was a gap in the market so I pounced."

She looked back down eying her work critically.

"I knew you owned your own business but I had no idea how enormously talented you are!" he gushed.

"Melissa's designs was basically just me at one time. It grew surprisingly quickly. My reputation just keeps growing. I hand pick all my employees very stringently. There are more and more every position I need filled. It's very hard they have to design me a whole array of rooms in different styles and like maybe modern or a Victorian townhouse. What type of materials they would use." she stopped her rambling. "Sorry if I'm going on and on I just think if people are paying me for a job they should have the best."

"They'd only get the best if they had you." he said without thinking.

She shook her head. Some of my employees are far better than me. I'm very proud of some of them. They are amazing. Been with me since they were 16. Straight outta school. I gave them a wage and supported them through college. In return they have been loyal to me."

"Your very through and supportive."

"In my line of work I have to be. If a house turns out badly then it's my fault!"

She picked up her laptop. Looked around. "Where's the kids?"

He looked up. "They must have left while we were talking. I didn't notice." he was too busy drooling over her.

She nodded and loaded her computer up. It whirred. She yawned widely. Felt her eyes grow heavy. She leaned back against the sofa. Her eyes closed of their own accord. She moved her head til she found the best spot. She sighed and rested.

Danny nearly had a heart attack. He was watching the English news. Football scores. He felt something rest on his shoulder. He jumped and he heard her groan in annoyance. He hadn't been expecting it. He looked and saw Melissa sound asleep laptop about to topple onto the floor. He closed the lid and placed it on the table. She turned so she was now lying down on his chest out her arm around him. Hugged him tightly. Heat streaked through him.

"Miss wake up."

"Minute. Tired." she mumbled groggily. Burrowed closer.

Danny decided to let her sleep for a little while. What could it hurt? He went back to watching TV.

(X)

Two hours later he awoke, looking at an unfamiliar ceiling. The TV 's sound turned down spewed laughter. Why wasn't he asleep in his room. He looked down and was staring into chocolate brown eyes. Eyes he couldn't resist. She wasn't blinking obviously half asleep. He was on his back on the sofa she was lain half on top of him. Her head close to his now pounding heart. She had to hear how hard it was beating. His legs were tangled with hers. Her arm slain across his belly. He expected her to scramble off him muttering apologies but she didn't move. Just stared into his eyes.

"Hey." he said

"Hey." she replied huskily.

"You ok?" he asked.

She nodded.

"You even awake?"she shrugged. Meaning no. His heart stopped when she smiled a sleepy sexy grin at him she reached up and kissed him. He responded eagerly after the initial shock had wore off.

"I've missed you so much," she told him between kisses. "Thought of you every minute of every day. Shauna keeps telling me I should forget you but I can't. I'll never be over you. I love you. I always will." she returned to kissing him.

His body was singing at her touch. At her words. Literally singing. She was pressed tightly against him and she was still trying to get closer. Her arms were above his head and she was face to face with him. Her warm breath tickled him. The smell of her shampoo filled his head.

"I love you too." he promised. Then groaned her name. He flipped her so she was beneath her and kissed her deeply. He exhaled deeply and pulled away.

She squeaked. "What?"

"We have to stop this. You are still asleep. When you wake you'll hate me if I take advantage of you this way."

"Doesn't a tiny bit of you want to take advantage of me?" she asked hiding her face in his arm.

"Miss. 99.9 percent of him is telling me to take advantage of you. But I don't want you to hate me." he climbed off her. "Sorry I didn't mean to fall asleep. I was watching this really bad comedy next thing I now I was waking up."

"S'kay. Goodnight." she prompted needing him to leave her alone. Her hands now hid her face.

"Night Miss." he murmured and left the living room.

She lay there her face covered and came awake slowly. Mortified by her behaviour. "oh God!" she groaned. As embarrassed as she was her body still hummed for his touch. There was no way she as ever gonna be able to sleep tonight. She spotted her laptop in the corner of her eye, she sat up grabbed it and resumed work.

**A/N this was something i have had written for a while but got sick of the angst so played around with it (Meaning orignally it was danice) and there we go. hope it's at least passable. x**


	78. D27 Nothing Has Changed

The next morning came quickly. Missy went to Danny's room to retrieve Ryan so he could have a lie in for a change. She crept in his room holding her breath. She didn't hazard a look at him.

"You awake this time?" Danny asked sleepily

She cringed. "Yeah." covered her face. "Look Danny."

He rose from the bed moved her hands and kissed her passionately. "This has been the only thing on my mind since I left you earlier. You've bewitched me Miss. I need you now so tell me no now that your awake."

He kissed her again and her desire matched his. Her kisses as feverish as his. He heard no words of denial. Felt no resistance.

"I need you too Danny." she finally admitted.

Danny accepted defeat. Took it willingly. She needed him and he needed her and all that matters in this moment was the way they felt and the love that throbbed between them. The fire inside them overflowed and they were consumed by the flames.

(X)

Danny held Missy tightly. Neither person spoke. That had been, for him beyond words. It had felt like he came home even though he hadn't even left! He knew something was wrong with Miss. She was always a cuddler. Snuggled so close she was nearly under his skin, but now she was on her side with her back to him. Quiet.

"Miss?" he asked.

"Hmmm?"

"You ok honey?"

She exhaled. "I love you." she said sincerely.

"I love you too. Always." he promised. Pressed a kiss to the back of her neck.

"Do you?" she asked. Turned so she lay on her back and ran a hand through her hair.

"What sort of fool question is that?" he questioned softly.

"A serious one Danny."

"Well yes I do love you. We went through a rough patch but that's all it was. My feelings didn't change then and they won't now. We're good together Miss."

"Danny I didn't plan this." she told him gently.

"I know."

"Your not understanding me. Look just coz we….slept together….it changes nothing Danny." she whispered.

He frowned and she climbed from the bed.

"Slept together?" he asked sitting up. "I dunno if it escaped your notice but there was no sleeping involved Melissa!" his voice had rose an octave.

She was dressed and spun. "Fair enough Daniel. Coz we had sex nothing has changed."

He made a disgusted face. "So I'm a tawdry one night stand?"

She covered her face. "No Danny your not. I DO love you."

"Then why cheapen what we just did? What we have?" he asked.

She didn't answer. Sat at the bottom of his bed. Her face still covered. "I don't like needing you. It's not something I'm used to. I hate it truly hate it!"

"It's ok to need me Miss. I need you too." he told her softly.

"It means I'm weak!" she fumed.

"It means your in love." he countered.

"Is this what love is? Is love upsetting people? Making them cry? God what on earth are we doing?" she got up and paced.

"Wiping the slate clean maybe? Falling in love with each other again. That's all it isn't a bad thing Miss."

"Well I don't wanna be in love."

"Sweetheart we're already there. That's how I can hurt you. If you didn't care then it wouldn't hurt. The same way hearing you belittle what we have and hearing you say you want to walk away is killing me!"

"Van…" she started.

"Don't mention her name Miss. Not in here. Not after what we shared."

Ryan mewled and then quieted. Danny realised something which scared him. "Miss…look are you…protected?"

As his words sunk in she clamped a hand over her mouth. Her eyes widened and she sucked in a sharp breath.

"Ryan isn't even 6 weeks yet. It's still the early dangerous time!" she panicked. "What if…" she felt sick. "We have to sort this Danny. I can't lose my mind again!"

"You won't Miss. C'mon it wouldn't happen after one time anyway."

"I'm still worried Danny."

"Go to the hospital. We both will actually. Get the pill."

"No I'll go alone!" she said.

"Miss don't push me out I love you."

"I love you. I just don't know who you are anymore. I don't even know myself either!"

He stood and wrapped his arms around her from behind. She yearned to lean back in his embrace but she didn't. "Everything will be ok Miss." he told her softly. He felt buoyed by the fact she didn't pull from his embrace. Ryan began to cry.

"He's hungry!" she said and pulled from his arms. Went to pick her son up. She cooed at him. He cried more. She looked at Danny. He walked over and Ryan stopped crying at the sight of him. Missy went to pick him up and Ryan began to cry again. Hurt filled Missy. She swallowed thickly.

"He doesn't want ME he wants you!" she said sadly. Walked from the room quickly.

"Miss he's always crabby when he first wakes up. He's fine after a little bit. Like you." he called after her. He had no idea if she heard.

Missy walked from the room. What happened in there only strengthened her resolve to go. She had no willpower around Danny and she could easily just allow herself to forget everything but then it would fester and she'd become paranoid. Paranoid Melissa wasn't good Melissa! She had a good time with Ryan yesterday and today he bawls his eyes out at the sight of her. He obviously knew what she suspected. That she wasn't good enough! She climbed in a truck and made her way to hospital.

**A/N short chapter. sorry bt i am seriously not happy with the way this is goin so i am contemplating rippin up wot i have. there's more going to happen and urg...so if there are no updates in a bit i am trying to rewrite the crap i have grrrr.**


	79. D28 Talk

**4 Days Passed**

Missy rose early. After having a long stretch she showered. She had been awake an hour and a half. It was 7:30 and Danny still wasn't awake. He'd looked really peaky last night, barely touched his tea and went to bed with Ryan too. She flipped the switch on the coffee maker and went to his bedroom. She knocked on the door.

"Danny!" she called.

Nothing.

"Oh C'mon Danny!"

She didn't really want to go in there what if they made a repeat mistake? She played the scenario back in her mind. She could leave him, but what if something was seriously wrong! She was an adult. She could say no, walk away. She could control herself! Her worry for him overrode the other feelings and she decided to go in and check on him. She had to collect Ryan too eventually as well so…. She opened his bedroom door. Danny was asleep on his back. Eyes closed. Sweat coated his brow and he was deathly pale. She hurried over and saw that Ryan was fine. Still sleeping peacefully. Looked back at Danny. Was his chest moving? It didn't look like it! Her heart plummeted and started to race. She sat beside him on the bed. Put her hand on his chest relief filled her as she felt his strong heartbeat. She touched his forehead and felt he was burning up. Clammy.

"Danny?" Missy asked softly.

"Alice." he murmured feverishly. "Missy." he said with such longing. He frowned and exhaled.

"You'll be fine Danny." Missy told him. Walked from his room and collected some water and a cold compress for his head. She wet it wrung it out and placed it on his head.

As the cold touched his head he opened his eyes, saw her sat above him and smiled. "Miss." he whispered.

"Danny honey your ill but you'll be fine when you go back to sleep."

"You cant leave Miss." he said tiredly. "Don't go." he whispered. Saying things he could never say when he was fine.

She said nothing.

"Please Miss stay here forever. I love you and I'm sorry I hurt you." a stray tear fell from his eye. "I'd never wanna hurt you for anything in the world." Another tear followed it's predecessor.

Missy was shocked. A man had never cried for her before. She felt bad what she had did to him. Feeling rushed through her at the same time. She knew that he loved her, this proved it.

"I'm here Danny. I won't leave you I'll be here when you wake up. I love you." she pressed a kiss to his lips. She was gonna end up ill but she didn't care. "You just concentrate on getting better."

His eyes were closed, breathing slow and deep, she touched his face lovingly.

"I love you always Melissa." he murmured in sleep. "Marry me"

Missy opened her mouth to reply. "Y…" Clapped her hand over it suddenly. Stunned at this overwhelming urge to say yes. When had this happened? She wasn't even sure if she could stay and yet she was nearly agreeing to marry him!

"I do." he murmured tiredly. Then was silent again.

She leaned in close to his ear. "I do." she whispered. He sighed. He opened his eyes clearly feverish.

"Your so beautiful Miss. Especially in a white dress!" his eyes then closed again.

Missy's face turned sentimental. Oh he could be so sweet sometimes!. It was one of the things she loved about him. She was so deep in love with him if encompassed her. What would be the point of denying it anymore? She was so over her head it was unreal! She was literally crazy over him. Certifiable. And she wasn't so flippant with words like that anymore!

She picked their son up from his cot after she cooled Danny down and covered him up. Marvelled at what she and Danny had created together. This perfect little boy.

"It look like it's just you and mummy today Ryan. Daddy's ill!"

She walked into the kitchen and placed some toast in the toaster. Amie walked from her room. Saw Ryan on Missy's shoulder. She made faces at him.

"Where's dad Miss?"

"He's not feeling well Ames. so you have me for the school run today!"

"What's the matter with dad?" Amie asked worried.

"He's hot and tired. Feverish. He'll be fine after a long sleep."

Amie nodded. "Is Ryan ok?"

Missy nodded. "He really wants a hug off his big sister though."

Amie beamed and held out her arms. Missy handed her Ryan. She instantly had him smiling.

"Your great with him you know." Missy told her.

"I love him to bits." Amie told her. "What's not to love eh Ry Ry?"

Missy placed toast on a plate and a bowl of cereal in front of her. Amie handed Ryan back to Missy and began to slowly eat her breakfast.

"Just coz Ryan is here doesn't change anything you now. I love you the same as I always have." Missy told her.

"He's your kid. I'm not." Amie said simply.

"You're my best friends baby. Which means your just as close to me as Ryan."

Amie shrugged like she didn't believe her.

"You know Amie if I could pick a daughter I'd pick you."

Amie froze blue eyes wide. "Really?"

Missy nodded. "Coz your so…one of a kind you know. Everyone says your like your mum. And no doubt you are but it's more than that. Your funnier than Alice used to be and she was hilarious. And your fearless whereas she was a tad cautious at times. You remind me a lot of me actually. Feisty hot headed, warm hearted. Funny clever smart but you are also really beautiful whereas I'm really not. It's weird that you're a combo of your mum and dad and you remind me of me!"

"Miss you don't have to say things like that you know."

"I really mean it Ames. I love Lexi to bits. And Ethan and Daniel too. But you. I feel bonded with you. I feel like I really know you. I feel the same bond with Ryan as I do with you."

Amie thought for a moment. "Well if my mum was rubbish which she isn't she's the absolute best then I suppose I'd pick you as my mum too. You're a good step mum though, or step Miss."

"Yeah she was a really good mum. To all of you. Look Ames." she was trying to broach a uncomfortable subject. "I swear to you Ames, when I threatened you." she exhaled. "I hope you know that I would never do anything to hurt you….and your project!" she made an I don't know gesture. "I dunno what was going through my head." she reached for Ryan's warmed bottle.

"I know Miss. Why do you think I back chatted you? I did that and said that knowing full well that you'd never do it. And what I did to the project was pretty nasty. I shouldn't have done it basically. I was just jealous of Ryan coz I thought he was taking you away from me. I thought I was losing you. Since mum died you've been really good and I didn't wanna lose that!" she said quietly and stirred the milk in her bowl.

"Look Ames, whether I am here with your dad or somewhere else I am always here for you. I'll never leave you without somebody to talk to. I'm always here."

"Thanks Miss. You're the best."

Missy nodded. "So anything new on the school front?"

"It's still rubbish but I get through it."

Missy smiled. "You having problems, any at all?"

"No I get the feeling everyone is scared to see me kick off. I battered someone for calling you a psycho." she admitted. "They all watch me like I'm about to go off on one!"

Missy grinned. "I knew you reminded me of me!" she checked her watch. "I'm gonna give Daniel a knock or he'll be late."

She walked down rubbing Ryan's back. "Hey Daniel." she knocked on his door.

"I'm up." he replied.

"Kay!" she yelled. Rejoined Amie.

"Do you love my dad Miss?" Amie asked.

"Yeah I do." she replied truthfully.

"Is that why Ryan is here? Coz you have kids with who you love. That's what mum always said."

"Yeah I guess so." She replied.

"How come your with dad?" she asked curiously.

"I don't understand Amie."

"Well if mum was still here would you and dad still go together."

"Oh no no no no." she said quickly. "Never in a million years."

Amie frowned. "So why now?"

Missy thought. "You're a little young to understand fully." about chemistry and sexual attraction and flirting she added silently. Rubbed her jaw with her fingers. "See it's like magnets you learned about magnets at school?"

Amie nodded.

"When you older. Much older. You'll feel something pull you like a magnet towards another person. You don't know why you just attracted and drawn to them." c'mon miss keep it simple! "See me and your dad are like magnets but your mum was for want of a better term a third magnet. She was in between us so we sorta repelled you know. But see once that third magnet was gone we ended up slowly becoming attracted. BUT if your mum had always been that would never have happened you understand? And I would never have hurt your mum like that coz sisters don't do that! I didn't even know how I felt until I was in love with him. Long after your mum passed away."

Amie frowned.

"To put it simply. We both loved your mum so we didn't notice each other till after she was gone. We helped each other through the sadness and feelings grew without us even knowing. The more support we gave each other the more we fell in love."

Amie nodded, still unsure but she knew Missy and her dad loved her mum and that was all that mattered.

"I'm gonna go and dress Ryan ok. See you in abit."

"Sure thing Miss."

Missy walked into Danny's room. He was asleep. She laid Ryan in his cot dipped the now warm compress in the water and placed it back on his head. He stirred.

"I gotta get up!" he said weakly.

She put her hands on his shoulders and pushed him back on the bed gently.

He smiled at her.

"Down boy." she murmured.

"Man" he muttered.

She smiled. "Your ill. I'm sorting everything. You sleep!"

"I hate being ill!" he complained.

"Poor baby." she kissed him softly.

"Why do you look like the cat who has the cream?" he asked suspiciously.

She shrugged and picked up some blue dungarees and a t-shirt for Ryan.

"Why not? Ryan is happy and healthy. Me and Amie had a little moment and sometime in the next century I'll drag Daniel out of bed. All is well with the world."

She lay Ryan on his mat and dressed him.

"I'm delirious." he muttered.

"Go back to sleep then!" she whispered. Kissed his cheek. Patted Danny's face with Ryan's hand. "Get well soon daddy." she told him in a baby voice then walked back to the door. "Oh and to answer your question earlier - yes." she closed the door and listened from the other side.

"Question?" he asked. He couldn't remember asking question. "Miss?" he asked. She walked away with a huge smile.

**A/N i am feeling in a better mood atm yay! i also wrote the ending of this story. fluff as promised bt there is more to cum b4 we get to that. this chapter didn't really get tweaked all that much as i sed i mite do in my prev chappie i like it anyway :) x**


	80. D29 Content

**Rascal Flatts Easy **

**The truth is  
****I miss  
****Lying in those arms of his  
****But i don't  
****Ever  
****Let it show**

(X)

After the kids had been dropped off at school and she had ventured going into the dreaded animal surgery Missy took Ryan shopping. He was strapped to her chest in a baby carrier. Are you looking Ryan. See all these girls here will be in love with you when your older coz your already the most gorgeous little boy anyone has ever seen! She rubbed his head. "But no girl is allowed near you til your thirty coz you're mummies baby!" she said seriously with a smile. "One day though you'll meet someone. That special someone and you'll just know. And hopefully you won't make a big mess of things like I did! You don't have to worry about girls just yet. They'll be yucky for a fair few years yet."

Ryan blinked tiredly. "You just want more Donald Duck don't you?" she smiled softly and felt love for her son fill her entire soul. These feelings were still new and she loved them. And her feelings about his father? Although different and much harder matter! She did love him. And sometimes when they were together and laughing like old times she forgot about all the nasty words and actions and she had fun. But then it would just hit her like a bolt from the blue and everything changes. the heartbreak and confusion and anger comes back! She rubbed Ryan's head affectionately.

"O so it is time for some food shopping. I know you need milk and nappies." she grabbed a trolley

"Yup definitely more milk coz you are mummy's little guzzler! I should warn you thatwhen we get home daddy can talk some patter when he is ill. Just in case he's awake. He's cute though. Like you. But we left him lying in bed so you are at my mercy. I bet if you could crawl you'll be away!"

Missy was actually quite nervous. She had never had to watch Ryan by herself without Danny there as back up. She could do it though she knew. Or she would go down trying! She thought seriously. God Miss what is he a freaking sniper? Quite with the dramatics yeah?

She pulled out her shopping list. "Rytio little man keep your eyes peeled!" they walked. "This is definitely the more tedious part of life - food shopping. O and work. Although I don't do much of either to be honest. Well except for when Mel at my job tries to destroy the business I built from the ground up." she fumed.

"Sorry son." she whispered. "Rant over I promise. See I'm an interior designer and she was sending out seriously bad designs and seriously flawed ones too. See people come to me to design their homes to look trendy, modern old fashioned anything they want. Sometimes they don't even now what they want and that's when I let myself go!" she said excitedly. "I used to travel when I was younger sourced a lot of materials I know my stuff. Get initiatives from all different walks of life too." she smiled. "It was really hard at first and I nearly quit way back in the beginning but…and mum is about to teach you a life lesson here, never give up. If it's worth it and you want it badly enough and I really did."

She looked at her half full trolley. Time was passing quickly talking to Ryan. He looked at her unblinkingly. It wasn't her words. Just the tenor and tone of her voice as she spoke. Whether excited or bored. It mesmerised him!

"My parents lived long enough to se their oldest daughter running a successful business." Not that her dad cared. They hadn't spoke for 3 years before he died. "I built it all alone too. Well the bank helped but they made enough money in return so I don't count that as help."

Missy continued talking to Ryan. She told him about herself and his dad. Alice and Shauna and the ids. Till she came across a drunken man.

"You stoopid or sumthin?" he said heavily slurred.

Missy looked around. "You talking to me?" she asked.

"na I'm talkin to ya kid!" he said sarcastically. "Course am talkin to you!"

"Tell you mister I'm just gonna walk away!" she said

"You must be off your head. Having a conversation with a baby!"

He so hadn't called her that had he? Right just walk away Miss.

"Definitely child cruelty putting him though that!"

THAT'S IT! She picked up the first item that came to hand in her trolley and threw it at him. It exploded between his eyes and he screamed in pain. Missy looked at the remains of the orange on the floor. A uniformed man walking towards them. O great she was gonna get arrested! He walked passed her ignoring her.

"You intimidating customers again Leon?"

"No she assaulted me!" he whined.

"I thin you should leave." the guard guided Leon away from her, he disregarded Missy and the orange led the man out.

"Look Ry whatever you saw me do…." she looked own and saw her son fast asleep. She smiled at him lovingly. Pressed a kiss to his head. Moved the splattered orange continued her shopping but missed her conversation with her son. She finished soon and she had him strapped in his car seat and driving home. Humming along to the radio as she drove. The song Long Way Around the song of her life came on. She realised it didn't fit her as well as it used to. She didn't feel that urge to get away anymore. She knew she had to stay for the kids and that wasn't a bad thing it was a really good thing. She had roots.

She knew Alice and Shauna used to stress about her when she just used to disappear. But that was who she had been. She needed the freedom although if she had a partner no matter how long she was away she never chatted up other people. She just needed some new surroundings at times to clear her head and gain a new perspective and insight. See if her boyfriend had cheated on her and she didn't have to stay for the kids you wouldn't have seen her for dust but as it was she wasn't even tempted to leave coz she had people depending on her. Look at her all mature! It really used to drive Alice and Shauna mad and they used to worry constantly. She never used to say when she was going or when she'd be back just off one day and back the next. She always had plenty of stories to tell though!

"I guess I never apologised for scaring you like that huh?" she whispered to the clouds.

'_I understood you haven't had it easy.'_

"Neither have you Alice. But you didn't run away."

'_Yeah but I had Danny and Shauna.'_

"Not me though coz I just up and left." Missy said guiltily. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me!"

'_Your settled now Miss. There for my kids which is so much better by the way!'_

(X)

She was soon back home at Leopard's den.

"Ok Ryan." she looked back and saw he was still asleep. That was weird. He was usually awake for a feed by now. Then again he had stayed awake a long time at the township. She picked him up and on cue he mewled.

"Dreaming of a bottle." she whispered. "There's one in the fridge we'll take the chill off and then you can eat."

She carried him inside and put his bottle in the warmer. After a few minutes he was wailing.

"I now your starving but cold milk isn't good." she soothed.

She tried Donald Duck the tears continued. Faces, peek a boo. Still breaking his heart. She rested him on her shoulder and sang to him softly. Nothing in particular just a song she made up on the spot about a beautiful prince who was hungry for his dinner. He quieted like he was hypnotised by her voice, the bottle was ready she shook it and he latched on hungrily eyes blinking tiredly.

"Mummy's voice scared you into silence huh?" she laughed.

"You've got a lovely voice Miss. Smooth. Strong. Not like Leona Lewis or Whitney Houston but more like a 50's singer. Sweet, nice. Soft. At least you can hold a tune."

She turned around and saw Danny looking rumpled and sleepy but still gorgeous in his ill state. He had some colour back but was still very pale.

"You should be in bed."

He shuffled down the hallway.

"I feel better."

She gave him a yeah right look.

"There's the surgery and shopping to do." he countered.

"Sorted. I called the locum who arrived and is doing everything. That involved going in there. Ewww. And me and Ryan went shopping. Slow down Ryan baby you'll be sick." she said softly. "I think I could be getting over my aversion to your hospital!"

He sat down.

"Unless you get your butt outta that chair and back into bed you are gonna be in serious trouble!" she warned. Sat a sleeping Ryan up and winded him.

"I do feel better!" he stressed.

"Well you look like death warmed up!" she retorted. "Not quite as pale as a corpse though."

"I do not. I saw myself. I look cute!" he retorted.

She rolled her eyes. "Ryan is cute!" she declared.

"Come and sit with me." he asked. Giving her puppy dog eyes.

"After what we did in there a few days ago. No way!" she said sternly.

"Like I'm gonna be able to do that I'm ill!" he countered innocently.

"You said you were feeling better."

"Oh no Miss. I'm at deaths door!" he said seriously.

"Tell you what you go to bed and I'll sit in the rocking chair ok!"

He nodded and they walked to his room he climbed on the bed and sat down. She laid Ryan in his cot. "Lie down Danny."

"That wasn't part of the deal you said go to bed." he grinned.

"I'll walk outta here!" she warned.

"Try it."

She walked passed him. He moved to the bottom of the bed and tugged her arm so she fell. Pulled her up to the top and lay beside her. Put his arms around her waist and looked into her brown eyes.

"Much better." he sighed.

"Danny."

"Just for a minute eh? I'm ill." he faked a cough.

She smiled and closed her eyes feeling tired.

"Your beautiful you know." he whispered.

She opened one eye. He loved it when she did that. An only Missy trait. "Huh?"

He ran a finger softly down her cheek. "Your beautiful."

"And you are delirious from fever!" she retorted.

"I've been delirious from the day I fell in love with you, it's not a bad feeling."

"Danny what do you want from me?" she asked on a exhale.

"Only you. Us."

"Danny at the moment there is no us," she replied.

"What is this Miss?" he asked. "I know you love me. Your eyes tell me every time you look at me."

"Danny me loving you isn't the issue. Vanessa isn't even an issue any more. I sorted that. It's stuff that we say to hurt each other."

"I agree. I shouldn't have said it."

"I'm talking about stuff I say too Danny."

"That will take time to get over but we will if we want to!"

Time they didn't have. She had a few ideas for flats. She didn't tell him that though. "We'll talk through this when you are better yeah?" she suggested.

He nodded and they both closed their eyes, being here felt nice she was content.

"Miss." he said.

"Hmmm."

"Why have you and Lex fell out? You always disappear when she comes around."

"You thought I told her the reason why I was leaving was coz of what you did. I didn't as you know. I told her it was mutual. She of course didn't believe me. Called me childish and accused me of trying to hurt you. She didn't like it." she said softly.

"Miss you.."

"Danny her going off on me is preferable to her going off on you ok!"

Her tone final she closed her mouth. Lay awake with her eyes closed. Savoured the feel of his arms around her. She could have this back if she worked through what was bothering her. They blatantly loved each other. That in itself was part of the problem. Loving him left her open to him hurting her! He could destroy her if he wanted and she couldn't let anyone have that power over her. She cut off her musings and snuggled closer to Danny she was just going to relax and sort everything later. It wasn't often she felt as good and content as she did right now and she wanted to enjoy it while it lasted!

**A/N ok this again is worked so it is better than what i had b4. listening to rascal flatts new album it's great. love the song with easy ft natasha bedingfield. **


	81. D30 Headache

An hour later Missy was awake. Disorientated. Someone's arm had her pinned to the bed. She had vision of being back in the hospital. She couldn't move. NO! she panicked. The grip was tight she had to move him. She tugged and fought and was free of the weight she rolled and hit the floor with a thud, the back of her head hit off the nightstand and she swore. Clutched her head. Pulled her hand away and saw blood on her fingers where the handle had dug into her scalp. She had been awoke far too quickly and was annoyed now! She hit the cabinet and busted her knuckle. Swore again

"You ok Miss?" Danny asked sitting up. Saw the blood on her fingers. "Miss?"

"I'm ok." she asked clutching her head.

"What happened?" he asked.

"Someone had me pinned and I panicked!" she said accusingly.

"Don't take your temper out on me coz you just woke up!"

She glared at him. "I'm not taking my temper out on anyone."

"Yeah and I don't have a target painted on the middle of my forehead!" he retorted.

"NO!"

"Miss I'm sorry I had you pinned ok!" he said softly.

She was still angry.

"Fine ignore me!" he said petulantly.

"I am!" she retorted.

"You can never let us be happy!" he fumed.

"I'm just gonna get out of here before one of says something we regret!"

She walked out of the bedroom and into the bathroom. Dabbed at her head and knuckle. Heard Lexi yell hello as she walked into the house. "oh no!" she whispered walking from the bathroom.

"Lex your dad is ill, in bed." Missy told her softly

"Ok."

Missy walked into the kitchen. Lexi followed her. "Where's Ryan?"

"Asleep too." Missy told her .

"You been ok with him by yourself?"

Missy's temper snapped. "I don't have to be watched around him. I'm not gonna hurt him!"

"Well excuse me for being concerned about my baby brother!" Lexi snapped.

"Well you don't have to be!"

"Neither do you Miss. Seeing as your leaving!"

"That has nothing to do with you Lex!" she warned.

"When your hurting my family it does!"

"Lex I have a headache can you please leave me alone."

Lexi was foaming. "Voices returning?" she asked nastily

"What did you just say?" Missy's fists were clenched.

"I asked if your little friends were back!"

"I should smack you in the mouth!" Missy fumed.

Lexi grinned cockily. They were toe to toe in the kitchen. "I'm not scared of you Miss!"

"Good, then if I do give you a smack I'll know you brought it on yourself!"

"Try it then Miss!" Lexi goaded.

Everything in Miss wanted to smack Lexi for what she said. She was barely holding on! "Why do you provoke me Lex?"

"It's not hard. Your unstable!"

Missy inhaled a huge calming breath. Her arms were shaking with the force of how hard she was holding back. "Right I'm gone before I lose it!"

"Yeah and coz no one loves you enough to calm you down. And no one loves you enough to make you stay!" Lexi called as she walked out.

As Missy passed she grabbed the telephone table and flung it across the hallway. Stalked from the house. Danny came from his room. Dressed. He was frowning. He held a baby monitor. "What is going on?"

"Missy being Missy." Lexi said dryly. "She said you were ill."

"I was. I feel a lot better actually. She took care of everything. Ryan too." he told her.

Lexi nodded. "You should watch her dad. She's unstable."

"Oh No! you didn't just say that to her did you?"

Lexi nodded.

"Oh for god's sake why?"

Lexi shrugged. "Told her a few home truths. She needed to hear them!"

"So you knew what you were saying to her and said it anyway Lex? It's not like you to be so nasty!"

"She's hurting you so I am hurting her!" Lexi countered.

"Lexi she's not hurting me. She isn't leaving coz of what she told you. It's my fault!"

"You don't have to take the blame dad. I just her the truth." Lexi stressed.

Danny paled. Sat opposite her. "Look Lex Missy is leaving coz…she saw mw kissing another woman at Fatani's bar."

Lexi was silent waiting for the punch line. The information soaked into her brain.

"You kissed someone else?" she asked in disbelief. "Why would Miss lie to me?"

"Coz she knows how much you love me. She didn't want you thinking badly of me."

"Well that explains her comments. God dad how could you do that to her? She adores you!"

"Lex I'm not gonna get into that. There is something else that is a million times worse." he inhaled deeply. "I was drunk and upset. She was telling me all this stuff and to hurt her I told her Ryan was better off without her!"

Danny saw Lexi's face darken. Her fists clenched tightly.

He nodded in acknowledgment. "And she believed it too. I'm surprised she is as eager to spend time with Ryan. I destroyed her confidence in herself as a mum. It was fragile as it was." his voice full of self derision and loathing.

"Why on earth would you wanna hurt her lie that? She loves you. LOVES YOU!" she yelled. She realised her words. "Oh God and I said…" Lexi jumped from her seat. "I have to see her. Apologise."

Lexi ran from the house at full speed. Her dad yelled her name as she was running out of the front door. She turned while she was still in motion. Felt a collision a second later. Felt the air whoosh from her body momentum pushed her forward and she landed on her hands and knees on the porch, heard a hard thud and a scuffle as something rolled across the ground at the bottom of the stairs.

**A/N Uh oh! short chapter. more tomorrow. x**


	82. D31 Tired

**Papa Roach - Time and Time Again**

_Her makeup smears_  
_The tears that she cries_  
_Over and over every night_

_Emotional swords slash my soul_  
_And now the pain takes control_  
_I think about you_  
_I think about me_  
_Think about the way that it used to be_

(X)

Missy walked back towards Leopards Den head pounding. The anger that coursed through her had faded and all she felt was sad. Sad that Lexi thought of her in that way, she'd had been unnecessarily harsh! She didn't want to hurt Danny but at the same time she couldn't forget his words. He hurt her! What else was she supposed to do?

The only reason she came back was incase Ryan needed her. As soon as he came into her head it was like an instant calm fell over her. She walked up the steps, head down deep in thought. She heard the thudding of footsteps and lifted her head - a second too late. A body barrelled into her. She felt the thud of impact and began flying backwards through the air. She was in mid air for what felt like forever. Everything was in slow motion. Time felt frozen then in a second she hit the floor, bit her tongue as she impacted and felt blood fill her mouth. Her head hit something sharp and she felt a screaming pain shoot from the base of her skull. Her body rolled a little but she didn't feel it. Her eyes were closed and everything was black.

(X)

Lexi lifted her head. Saw Missy lying across the floor on her side. A trickle of blood leaking from a split in the middle of her lip. She heard approaching footsteps. She was shocked into stillness trying to absorb the sight in front of her.

"Lexi are you…. Miss?" Danny yelped. Ran down the stairs and was beside her.

"Don't move her dad!" Lexi warned. Finally understanding what she was seeing. Her training had kicked in. "She's been out a minute phone an ambulance dad. She shouldn't be out this long!"

Lexi knelt beside her. "Miss can you hear me? It's Lex Can you open your eye's for me Miss?" checked her pulse. Good strong.

She made no movement or sound. Lexi checked the ground around her saw a rock embedded in the mud. Felt acid pool in her stomach. She put her hands around her head and checked it felt something sticky and wet cover her hands. She pulled them back and looked at them. Her hands were covered in a bright red liquid, not liquid - blood. "Jesus!" she whispered. No wonder she's out, that rock could have knocked her into the middle of next week.

Missy opened her eyes a little and peered at her. Frowned.

"Miss. Can you understand what I'm saying?" her pupils were blown. Head trauma! Lexi thought.

"Alice." she murmured. "Alice go. Shauna."

"Miss your ok." Lexi tried to assure her. Checked her vitals. Pulse was thready it was normal before! God she's going into shock!

Missy mumbled something but Lexi didn't understand it. "Alice. Shauna…..go!" she then stressed through her voice held no conviction.

"Miss do you know who I am? What day of the week it is?"

She exhaled and looked blank. Like she was lost inside her own head. "Miss!" she stressed.

In reply Missy blinked tiredly. Her eyes only half open.

"Miss I need you to stay awake for me. It is essential ok!"

Missy muttered gibberish in reply.

Danny walked from the house. "She hit her head earlier Lex." he placed the baby monitor beside him.

"Badly? Did she lose consciousness?"

"No but she was bleeding. She had a headache and was annoyed."

"Mum….dad….Alice." she whispered one after the other leaving a pause. She smiled.

Danny frowned. "Her parents are…" Danny started.

"Mum is…." Lexi also said and paled. "No way Miss! No no NO!" Don't dare do this to me! You don't see dead people so stop it now!" Lexi panicked.

"Calm down baby." Danny said. "Your helping but if you lose it..." he cautioned.

Lexi inhaled and nodded.

Missy eyes fluttered closed.

"No Miss don't close your eyes!" Lexi told her.

A car pulled into leopards den. Ethan Amie and Daniel climbed from it.

"I'm so excited!" Amie chattered as she climbed out. "Miss is gonna take me…." she looked over and saw Lexi over Melissa her hands covered in blood "Missy?" she yelled. "What have you done to her?" she shouted angrily at Lexi. She was beside her and held her hand.

"Missy what's wrong!" tears leaked from her eyes.

Daniel stood there beside Ethan. He was in shock.

"Miss wake up!" Amie asked and wiped away tears. Then stroked her face softly.

Missy opened her eyes once again and frowned at Amie confused. "Why are you little Alice? Why are you young?"

"Amie go inside. She's awake. She'll be fine." Lexi told her.

"No I'm not leaving her!" Amie declared stubbornly.

Missy blinked again wearily. "Tired." she winced and her hands shot to her head.

"Ethan!" Lexi demanded.

He walked over and took Amie's arm. "C'mon Ames, let Lexi do her job yeah."

Missy eyes had closed slowly.

"Lexi what is going on?" Danny asked worriedly.

"She's lost consciousness and I have nothing with me!" she said frustratedly. "Where the hell is that ambulance?"

All Lexi could do was monitor her vitals. Both pupils were blown proving she had some sort of damage to her head. They heard a siren in the distance. "Hurry up!" she hissed.

(X) **Missy P.O.V**

Missy's head hurt. Like someone was pressing a red hot poker to the base of her skull. It burned and throbbed relentlessly.

"Miss can you open your eyes for me?" a soft voice asked.

She wanted to sleep. Needed to. Her head ached she had to escape it. She kept on blacking out. Only caught snatches of words and sentences. She opened her eyes and was looking at a blond girl. Not Shauna. Is it Missy? No she's Missy! Her head hurt. It even hurt to think! Her eyes were blurry and she blinked trying to clear her vision. It didn't work. She didn't want this girl, she wanted Alice and Shauna.

"Alice…. Alice….go….Shauna!"

The girl didn't answer. Missy was so tired. She was just going to close her eyes. Just for a moment.

'_Missy get up. Don't go to sleep!'_ Alice told her.

Missy tried to move her head to find the source of the voice but it hurt too much to move. "Alice, can't see you."

She mumbled incoherently.

'_Missy no. you have hit your head. If you close your eyes Lexi will hate herself!'_

"Alice. Shauna. Go!" she repeated.

'_Miss what on earth are you talking about?"_

"Rest 5 minutes Alice."

'_Keep those eyes open miss! You can do it!' Alice encouraged._

Missy eyes rolled and closed.

'_Dammit Miss. You are making me angry!' Alice fumed. It was more fear from Alice then anything else. She knew what might happen if she let go. She might never wake up. "Hang on to that stubbornness abit longer yeah Miss!"_

Missy felt herself being pulled back and forth. Voices pulled her in opposite directions. Her mum and dad called to her.

"Missy!" a young childish voice rang.

She opened her eyes once again. Frowned when she saw the source of the voice. "Why are you little Alice? Why are you young?" she asked tiredly.

"Amie go inside. She's awake. She'll be fine!" the blond girl said firmly.

"No I'm not leaving her!" Alice replied stubbornly. That was her Alice! Alice would take care of her she knew.

In a second she was finding it incredibly hard to stay awake. Impossible even. "Tired." she whispered.

'_NO MISS!' Alice yelled._

She winced in pain as a white hot pain raced from the base of her skull to the front of her head. Her eyes closed slowly. She let her consciousness float away to wherever it wanted. It was preferable to the blank canvas that was her mind!

**A/N it mite seem the song has no relevance on the chapter i just had a feelin that it fit sumhow anyways... missy hmmmm wot it gona happen to her. and lexi, she caused it so how she is she gonna feel? most imporatntly will Miss survive and will the family survive?  
(This was wrote during my angst phase 2 weeks ago im nor relapsing thank god!)**


	83. D32 Hell

The paramedics arrived and Lexi shouted all the information at them.

"We have her now Miss. Calm down." a paramedic said to her.

"Don't Miss me Jobe!" Lexi hissed.

"Lex we have her now. She'll be fine." he promised.

"Dad you go with her. I've got the kids. I'll get in touch with Shauna too."

Danny nodded, handed her the baby monitor and climbed in the back beside Missy. Lexi gave her a last look. Her blond hair was covered in burgundy streaks. She wore a neck brace. They slammed the door and her gaze was pulled to the small dark red puddle on the dusty African soil. She turned sharply and hurried up the steps to escape the memory of ploughing into her. Of seeing her there unmoving. She checked on Ryan. He was fine. Still asleep. She heard sniffling and walked from the room. Saw Amie in tears in the kitchen.

"She's gonna die Daniel. Just like mum did. I know it!"

"Missy is strong Amie. She had a little fall that's all!" Daniel said softly.

"But all that blood. Mum died of losing blood too!"

"Mum lost a lot more blood than Miss did Ames. Miss lost a little bit!" he stressed.

"But Miss hit her head too!"

Daniel saw Lex approaching. "Look Lex tell Amie that Missy isn't going to die!" he pleaded.

"Amie." Lexi started. "Miss was awake which is a really good sign. She was talking too." Not that she recognised anyone.

"So she isn't going to die Lex?" Amie asked.

She made a face. "I can't say for definite but it's looking good Ames. I'm gonna go call Shauna ok."

The kids nodded. She grabbed her dad's cordless phone and dialled a number. It rang.

"Shauna's mortuary. The dead can rest easy." she said. Lexi stayed quiet for a moment planning what she was going to say.

"Hello creepy silence person." Shauna added.

"Shauna it's Lex." her voice grave.

"Oh no. Miss has snapped again hasn't she? We gotta plan another break out?" Shauna asked at her tone.

"No Shauna. There's….there's been an accident."

"Accident? What sort of accident?"

"Missy, she… she fell down some stairs."

"Oh God, is she badly hurt?" her voice shook.

"We don't know she's off to hospital."

Shauna exhaled. "What happened?"

"She um…she just fell Shauna. Landed on a rock which knocked her unconscious." she said guiltily.

"That fell sounded dubious Lex" Shauna said in a cool tone. "I spoke to Miss recently and knew that you aren't on the best terms. I know about the lies she told you to protect you. I know how you hurt her with what you said. Did you retaliate against her in any way Lex coz if you did…."

"I'll call later Shauna!" Lexi interrupted.

"No need! I'm on my way. I'll be there soon. This family needs kicked into touch!" she said determinedly.

**(A/N From here the chapter is a little...well not graphic but it isn't nice at all. just a little warning x)**

(X)

Missy came awake slowly. Her room was empty and dark. She was disorientated. The doctor walked in.

"Ah Miss Lynch, your awake."

She nodded and winced.

"How do you feel?"

She wobbled her head. "Sore but not as bad as I should feel."

"Well after a few tests we will discharge you if you'd like."

Missy nodded she was eager to home to her family.

Before Missy knew it the tests were done, she was given a clean bill of health and told she could go home. One thing that she found weird was that no one had visited her yet. She'd been sat for a fair few hours and she hadn't seen one person! Not that that mattered she was home now and happy to be, although the taxi driver had taken a completely different random route into Leopards Den. Again weird. She saw 2 people on the porch, a young girl and a man. The man pushed a strand of the girls hair behind her ear lingering on her face for a second. Their voices drifted towards her.

"You a pretty girl." the man murmured with a smile. The mans voice teased her subconscious.

She moved and finally saw the girls face. It was Amie and she was smiling happily at the man.

"Thanks." Amie's voice carried. "I had no idea Missy has such a nice uncle!"

A rock fell into the pit of Missy's stomach at the word uncle. Her heart stopped in her chest.

Andy's hand ran down Amie's arm and his hand came to rest over hers. "I'm a very nice man Amie. Especially to my friends. I sometimes have special friends and we play special games. Auntie Melissa was one of my special friends when she was younger. Do you want to be one of my special friend's too?"

Amie smiled. "Was she?" Amie's eyes shining. She liked being the same as Missy. "Is being a special friend really good?" she asked excitedly. If Missy was his special friend it was probably the funnest thing ever!

He leaned in a little closer and whispered. "It's the best ever!"

Missy charged towards them ready to tear him apart. God what on earth was he saying to her niece. He was gonna die! She stopped when she saw that Andy was sat beside her and had his arm around her shoulders.

"What you doing Andy?" Amie asked. She hadn't seen Missy yet and neither had he.

"Special friends have special hugs." he murmured. "And special kisses too."

God Missy was gonna be sick! "Hey Amie come to auntie Missy yeah?" her voice shook.

Andy looked up at her and he grinned excitedly. "Ah Melissa I can't tell you how good it is to see you again. How much it's pleasing me." Missy ignored his drawled statement as his hungry eyes ran over her body. He stood up and took a step towards her.

All Missy cared about was getting Amie away from this monster, this wasn't happening to her! He wasn't ruining Amie's life like he ruined hers!

"Miss why didn't you tell me about Andy. He's lovely and he wants us to be special friends like you used to be! He collected me from school and invited me to play here while you were in hospital. Dad told me not to go to strangers but he shown me pictures of you when you were little and said he was your uncle."

"God Amie come here please." hearing Amie talk in that way about Andy was making her feel really sick.

"He's playing with me. He really likes me." Amie told her with a huge smile.

Missy was worried. "Amie baby tell me, he hasn't touched you has he?"

Amie went quiet and looked at the floor guiltily.

"You bastard!" she launched at Andy. "It was bad enough me but her! I'm gonna….." she ploughed into him and he fell backwards onto the floor. She was above him trying to hit him but he kept blocking her. Andy flipped her so she was beneath him. She fought hard. Amie stood watching scared in shock.

"My beautiful Melissa. I knew you would return to me if I waited long enough!" he ran his free hand down her face.

She spat at him went to punch him but he grabbed her fist.

"Oh Melissa I am going to enjoy you again. I like fight. I like all this passion." he picked her up and set her on her feet. She lashed out but her weak body was no defence for his muscular physique. He pounded her back off the wall.

"Go back to hell!" she screamed.

"I'm in heaven dearest." caressed her cheek. Pressed his lips to it quickly. She threw a punch at him and her forearm connected with his head.

"Oh Melissa you taste as sweet as I remember but you have spice now. Fiery. It's a lot better and a bigger turn on too!" he murmured.

He hit her head off the wall twice and she wobbled weakly. In a second he pulled a pair of handcuffs from his pocket and fastened one around her wrist. He cuffed her to a wooden pole of the veranda. She was sat on the floor unable to move.

"I was gonna use them on Amie later but I know you'll appreciate them more." Andy grinned malevolently.

"Amie come here darling." he said a sweet tone.

She stared at him. "Why did you hurt Missy?"

"Get here now!" he spat angrily.

She walked over in shock. He had never spoke to her in that manner before.

He bent down and looked deeply in her eyes.

"I love you a lot you know." he said sweetly.

"Really?" she asked confused.

He nodded earnestly. "Lots and lots and lots!"

"Amie don't listen to him!" Missy pleaded yanking at her handcuff. "Get out of here!"

"Go fetch the cage for me." he asked again in a sweet voice.

Amie's face paled.

"You know I won't hurt you darling. Remember I love you. No one has or ever will love you like I love you and no one loves me like you do."

Amie frowned. She wasn't sure if she loved him.

Missy felt de ja vu looking at Amie's face. The battle inside her. Did she love him? Amie was questioning herself the same as she had all those years ago!

Missy pulled at her cuff harder. "Amie baby please don't listen to him. Please. He's lying. Get out of here while you can!"

Amie looked at Missy then at Andy's pleading face.

"You promise you won't hurt Missy either?" she asked.

"I won't." he said lying to her. Amie nodded and walked away.

"Ames no!" she whispered at Amie's back.

Andy walked towards her and she kicked out at him. He restrained her by sitting on her legs.

"Such a lovely girl." he mused. "So much like you used to be as a sweet little child. She is the next best thing to you."

"Let her go! She doesn't deserve this!" Missy fumed.

"Ah don't worry your pretty little head Melissa. You are still my one and only. My favourite. The light of my life. As soon as you realise you feel the same way I'll leave her alone. As soon as you realise we belong together I won't need her to keep me happy coz I'll have you!"

Missy felt bile rise. He was completely serious. "Look Andy let her go home and I'll…" she tried to think of something to give him. Only one thought popped to mind. "I'll do what you want!" she exhaled.

He froze eyes wide with excitement. "Anything?" he asked.

She paled and nodded stiffly. He smiled at her. "Coz you know I was thinking, me and you….we could…have a family of our own. That baby they took it away from you but I won't let them do that again I promise." he stroked her face. A single tear slid down her cheek.

"We'll be the best parents!" he gushed. "My Melissa a mummy to my little boy or girl." Missy hated his proprietary attitude towards her.

"You have to let Amie go." Missy demanded.

"Already done as soon as she is back I will tell her to go home to her dad, her brothers and sister. I know you will probably want to make a start right away. I know I do!" he hissed.

God why on earth was he saying that like a threat.

"I forgive you for Ryan Melissa. He should have been my son but I forgive you."

Amie appeared dragging a cage behind her. There was a small translucent wisp like figure inside.

"Amie go home to your dad." Andy told her.

She nodded and walked up to say goodbye to Missy.

Missy hugged her tightly with her free arm.

"Goodbye missy I love you."

"Love you too. Now go back to your dad and Lex, Ethan, Daniel and Ryan as fast as you can. And never ever come back here!" Missy stressed.

"I'll tell them you're here. They'll love to see you."

"No you won't!" Andy said coldly. "Melissa wants us to be alone."

"Just hurry up and get home Ames. Remember never come back!"

Amie hurried off. Andy still sat opposite Missy.

"This place isn't leopards den is it?" she asked.

"Nope but this is the only place you ever felt truly at home so I recreated it for you."

"So I am in hell then?" she said dejectedly.

This isn't hell Miss this is heaven. Our heaven where we can be together forever. You shouldn't have told your parents Miss. I know you wanted to share our happiness but they didn't understand. They said you were too young but I know you weren't, they were wrong! You knew how you felt about me. Don't worry about all those years now though. We can be together for eternity up here!"

"Why me Andy?" she asked the question that had plagued her for years.

"Coz even from that young age you were gorgeous. And the way you looked at me I knew you thought I was nice too. I needed you from that instant. Your like a disease, an addiction. Your all I think about."

"I was a child Andy. Didn't you feel guilty? 11 years old is still a baby."

"You knew what you were doing in your skimpy shorts. How was I supposed to resist you? You wanted me as much as I wanted you. More even."

Missy froze and her breath caught. No no this was lies! 5 minutes with Andy had her doubting again.

'_Don't listen to him Miss! I'll sort this!' _Alice vowed.

"Do you agree you led me on Melissa. That you loved me and wanted the things we shared?" Andy asked.

She shook her head. "A child doesn't know how to do stuff like that. Doesn't understand!"

"My opinionated Melissa." he ran his hand down her cheek.

"Why couldn't you leave me alone? Find a woman your own age?" she asked angrily.

"Coz I feel in love with you. I needed you. I wanted you to be mine. I wanted all your firsts to be ours. I should have waited but I couldn't resist you." he murmured and leaned in. Melissa backed away as far as she could. Cringed and pulled at her cuffed arm. His breath on her face made her nearly be physically sick!

"Your right." he said breathless from excitement and anticipation. "The longer we wait the better it'll be. I waited 30 years I can wait 5 minutes especially since I want to make it special for you."

He moved quickly and pressed a kiss to her lips. He then walked away looked back at her and his eyes flared.

As soon as he was gone Missy was violently sick in the bushes on the other side of the veranda. She rubbed her mouth violently trying to erase the feel of his lips on there. She sat breathing heavily trying to come up with a plane.

"Right Melissa think. You've been in bad situations before. You can get out of this!" she whispered. She was seriously up the creek without a paddle and to make it worse her canoe was speeding towards a waterfall!

'_Swim away Miss!' _Alice told her.

"Shark infested waters Alice." she retorted.

'_We have a problem we think it through rationally and deal with it. Same as always Miss.' _Alice told her.

"Rationally? I'm about a millisecond away from freaking hysterical. I mean god I'm talking to a voice in my head out loud! I love you mate but I am in a serious mess here. You helped me last time but Alice you obviously are in heaven and I am so very obviously in hell!"

'_God Miss cut the dramatics they so aren't you!' _Alice chided.

"I think I'm entitled Alice. I'm really scared that I'm not gonna be able to stop him!" she said voice tinged with fear.

'_I appreciate you doing that for Amie. He hadn't touched her but he was planning on it.'_

Missy heard Andy humming happily to himself. He heard the Jordin Sparks song tattoo playing. God another bad memory to associate that song too! She had an idea. She pulled at the cuff with both hands.

'_What you doing?"_

"Trying to splinter the wood." Missy strained.

'_That isn't gonna work Miss!" _Alice told her dejectedly.

"What else am I supposed to do? Sit here and wait for the inevitable?" Missy covered her face with her hands. "God I just wanna die." she moaned.

Andy popped his head out. Saw her holding her head.

"Aww Melissa not long now. I know your impatient so I'll hurry up. I'm just preparing our room." he grinned.

He disappeared and she shook her head. It was suddenly becoming glaringly apparent that she wasn't gonna be getting out of this one! She pulled harder starting to panic. "C'mon c'mon C'MON! Dammit NO this ISN'T happening to me again!"

'_Miss calm down. Think rationally.' _Alice tried to tell her but Missy wasn't listening. She was focused on trying to free herself. It was a futile thing. She hit the word pounded it angrily. "NO!" was silent a moment. "Think think! Ok I could knock myself out!" she thought. Was definitely preferable to the other option!

'_Miss you don't wanna do that!' _Alice warned.

"Well I sure as hell don't want to be awake!" Missy retorted.

'_What on earth will he do to you while your asleep?'_

"I won't know that's the point!"

'_Miss!'_

"What so you think I should fight him?"

'_That's exactly what I think Miss. At least then you go down swinging!'_

Missy was pondering those words as Andy walked outside. Missy's decision was made. If he was gonna do this then she wasn't making it easy for him. She was gonna fight him every step of the way! She psyched herself up. She could do this! She knew she could she was Missy, she could whatever she set her mind to!

"Remember your promise my love!" he shivered in anticipation.

Firstly Missy had made no promise and second if she let him do this then she was breaking a promise to herself where she had vowed that he would never do this to her again. Her promise to herself and that was far more important than anything she said to him!

He uncuffed her and stood up she began to fight immediately. She got in a few hits but he grabbed her wrists and restrained her immediately. He pushed her roughly against the wall.

"I really wanted to be nice." he said angrily. "But I think if this is what you want then I'll skip the niceties and take what I want in the dirt!" he pressed his body against hers. "I know you like me rough!"

She kicked and fought but nothing worked.

He pressed his face into her neck and inhaled. "I like your perfume." he whispered and ran his tongue in circles on her neck.

She screamed in rage. Felt contaminated with nuclear waste. Actually that was preferable!

"You have one more chance to play nicely or I'll throw you on this dirt down there and…." he whispered exactly what he was going to do to her.

She laughed hysterically although it held no humour. No way no freaking way! "Go to hell no I refuse to let you do this!" she shouted and struggled. "I don't want you touching me!"

"I hoped you'd do this!" he said happily. "If you insist my dear!" he said menacingly. He grabbed a fistful of her hair and dragged her down the stairs and flung her on the dusty ground. He was straddling her in a second. She raised her fists but he grabbed them and pinned them above her head.

"I must say this is an improvement from when you were a child!" he murmured and eyed her body hungrily. He restrained both wrists in one hand and his free hand began to roam.

"Bastard!" she raised her head to head butt him.

"I think I'll skip the preliminaries. Plenty of time for that later!" he opened the top button on her jeans and eased the zip down.

She fought and resisted more. NO this wasn't happening!

"I love you Melissa. Relax and enjoy yourself. I am!" he said breathless.

She felt tears gather and a sob rise but she forced them away! No tears she wasn't giving him the satisfaction!

She saw him fumbling with his jeans and swallowed thickly. Began to hyperventilate. God she couldn't stop this from happening!

"Ah Miss I have waited a long time. I can hardly….."

There was a thud and Andy fell on her suddenly. He was limp and she scrambled from under him. Miss was breathing heavily and her hands were shaking. She looked and saw Amie, tears streaming from her eyes with a metal pole in her hand.

"Amie?" she managed to squeak.

Amie nodded.

Missy went to her and hugged her to tightly.

"Help me." she tugged Missy's hand. She opened the cage that was across the way. The wisp cowered in the corner.

"'S'kay." Amie said softly. "We're friends."

Missy recognised the wisp. It was her! At 12 years old. As the cage door opened the wisp floated away into the sky. They dragged Andy towards the cage and put him inside. Locked it. Bolted it. Chained it. Padlocked it.

"This is where he stays now Miss. You have a prisoner in your own body long enough!"

It was no longer Amie speaking but a combination of Alice and Shauna.

"You are free now. Over what he done to you. Move on and be happy with your family!"

"But I'm in hell. He'll get out and it'll start again!" Missy said sadly.

Amie tapped her temple. Missy felt a searing pain.

"See you soon step Miss." Amie's voice had returned and she disappeared with a wink.

Missy felt something in her chest give. The guilt and self hate she carried for so long was no longer there. She felt lighter, her soul was finally free.

**A/N ok I knew I said in a previous chapter that missy was over it but Andy getting Amie was actually an idea that I had for another life another time. Found it in my old ideas pad. AND I just thought that he needed to be locked away in her head metaphorically soooooo…  
****This chapter is over 4000 words long :O never meant to make it so long sorry x**

**Tonight or maybe tomorrow i will have my next chapter of the lifes and times of danice up :)**


	84. D33 Wrong

Danny sat by Missy's beside. A day had passed and she hadn't awoke. The doctors were adamant she'd wake up soon. The blow she received had been hard enough to scramble her brains. They hadn't see what she was like! They insisted that her skull was intact and their was no inter-cranial bleeding. What bothered Danny was that they seemed completely unconcerned that she wasn't waking up. He looked at her and noticed she was frowning. She had cried silent tears before too, which killed him. Whatever she was going through was hurting her. He'd never felt so helpless before. He wanted to protect her so badly.

"C'mon Miss." he murmured "Wake up." then he could find out what happened. Lexi was being shifty. She was quiet and guilty. Very guilty. When he had called he head heard Lexi burst into tears in the background. She was inconsolable. And Ethan said she could barely even look at Ryan!

He watched her breathing. Slowly in and out.

"C'mon Miss your head is harder than that!" he whispered. Her face was different. Pale. Her lip split and puffy. The left side of her face all grazed from rolling across the floor. She was still beautiful though. Still stole the breath from his body. He really did love her. He now fully understood how much when he saw her lying on the ground. Not moving. Bleeding slowly. Her eye's closed. No sign of life in her face. For a second he thought she was gone and for a second he had went with her. Then Lexi had been beside her. Calm rational. Then he knew that she wasn't gone but she wasn't ok either.

Missy exhaled loudly. He looked at her intently.

(X)

Missy was lying on a bed. Her head throbbed in the same beat as he heart. She didn't want to open her eyes. They felt heavy. Like dead weights. Like they were welded shut. She opened it a crack. The other slowly followed suit. She was overcome by a sudden burning blinding white light. She groaned and closed her eyes threw her arm over them. Someone held her other hand tightly but tenderly.

"It hurts." she said wearily. She would fight anyone to the death but she hated pain, of any kind. The scrape of a chair against the floor sent pain streaking through her skull. The door opened with a squeal. Footsteps boomed. Noises were amplified.

"Too loud!" she complained. Eye's still covered.

"Melissa." a man asked in a soft voice.

"Yes." she replied eyes still covered. "Although I prefer Missy."

"I need to check your eyes. Can you move your arm please?"

"I can't. It's too bright in here. I feel blind with my eye's open." she told him.

"That's perfectly normal. I'll just close the curtains."

Danny was already over closing them. Missy moved her arm and opened her eyes slowly. It was still bright and she squinted but she could see. The doctor was immediately beside her and shined a light in her eyes. She groaned and then glared at him.

"OW!" she hissed.

The doctor smiled at her sarcastic tone. "What's the last thing you remember?"

"Um, I dunno." she thought back. I was talking on the phone I think. I was on the phone to my company. We're expanding and I was angry. Someone messed up an important project and I iced off big style. Which is weird for me coz I'm not that type of person."

Danny frowned. Expanding? He remembered that kick off as well. It had been 4/5 years ago. It had taken Alice hours to calm her down!

The doctor nodded. "Any pain? Nausea?"

"You being funny?" Melissa asked. "I'm tempted to check that my head is still attached."

"I'm very pleased with your preliminary results. I'm going to book some tests. "

"I'll pass with flying colours!" Missy said cockily grinning.

The doctor smiled and walked from the room.

"Hello." she said happily.

He was beside her and engulfed her in a huge hug.

"Hey careful there big guy. If Alice comes in and sees this she'll think something is going on!" she warned with twinkling eyes and a grin. "Sorry mate but I like life."

"Alice?" he asked concerned.

"Yeah Alice. Your wife. Mother of your kids. My best friend." she motioned so on with her hand. "You know Danny I was the one hit on the head. Not you! Where is she anyway? She should be sat there not you. I'm feeling seriously unloved here!"

"Miss, Alice couldn't be here." he said dazed in shock.

"I'll sort her later for neglecting me. I suppose I'll forgive her later seeing as though you have the kids."

Shauna burst into the room. "I just got here my flight was delayed."

"Owww Shauns!" Missy groaned as light flooded the room.

Shauna was by her side hugging her. "I thought your head was mad of granite! I got a call from Lex saying you'd been hurt. For a second I thought it was Al…" Danny elbowed her to keep quiet. Shauna glared at him. He shook his head but Shauna disregarded him.

"Look Shauna sit with Miss a sec while I go and see her doctor." Danny said and strode from the room purposefully.

Missy frowned. Why on earth was Danny going to see her doctor?

"Miss I received those pictures of Ryan you sent. Awww I'm so in love with him. He's adorable and cute. And looks the double if you. Luckily considering his dad!"

Missy was confused. "Ryan? Your married to James and you love a Ryan?"

"Ryan Miss! The baby. Your son." Shauna said.

"My son?" she squeaked.

"Yeah. Yours and Danny's little boy."

Missy yelped and nearly fell off her bed. Her face was one of horror. "Are you out of mind suggesting that? Actually even thinking it? If your trying to be freaking funny Shauna your failing badly! You know I don't see him in that way. God he's practically family! He spends 70 percent of the time annoying me and the other 30 percent thinking up ways of annoying me! God she'd kill me. Like I'd betray her like that!" her eyes flashed fire at Shauna. "Nice try trying to freak me out but no go Shay!"

"Miss you ok?" Shauna asked worriedly.

"Yeah it's you who has lost your mind. Me and Danny pfft! Alice'd kick off. String me up. I love and respect her too much to even think about betraying her with her husband who can I say is devoted to her. And to top it all off you say I've got a kid with him! Not funny Shauna, if that is the best you have then you'd better work on them. Did Alice and Danny have a hand in this joke too? Coz I should kill them too!"

"Miss Alice is dead." Shauna said softly.

"Now your going too far Shauna! You shouldn't lie about stuff like that!" Missy hissed. Looked at Shauna's pale face and sincere eyes. She felt her breath catch her eyes wide. Then shook her head. "No Shauna no she isn't so shut up! This isn't funny so stop it now!" inhaled a deep breath. "Tell me the truth Shauna now!" Missy was losing her temper her voice deadly. She was seething.

Danny walked in looking solemn.

"Danny make this…make her…." she took a calming breath so she could form a coherent sentence. "Tell me the truth Danny."

"Truth about what?"

"WE have no relationship firstly." she glared at Shauna. "And most importantly Alice is alive and well at home isn't she? ISN'T SHE?" she was breathing heavily anger returning.

Danny covered his face with his hand. "O Shauna." he whispered.

"D…D…Danny?" she stuttered. "Tell me she is Alice!"

"Miss." he said softly.

"Oh no!" she moaned and covered her face. The truth hit her like a tonne of bricks. The grief followed quickly. She folded her arms over her face. Gulped in big deep breaths. Hot wet tears screamed down her face. Her sobs quiet but apparent by her shaking shoulders.

"Now you've done it Shauna! She wasn't this bad when it actually happened!" he hissed.

"C'mon Miss." he tried to gather her into his arms.

"Leave me alone!" she pushed him away forcefully. "I wanna be alone!"

Hurt pierced through him. She needed to lean on him in times like this not push him away like she was doing now. Shauna moved him and pulled Missy close. Miss didn't push her away. Shauna murmured softly to her.

"I didn't even get to say goodbye!" she sobbed.

"It's ok Miss." Shauna soothed. "Alice knew you loved her."

After more soft murmurs missy's tears subsided. Her face was red and blotchy.

"When did this happen Shay?" Missy asked.

"Two years ago." Danny supplied.

"Two years ago? No way I saw her yesterday at the house!"

"Miss you've had a head injury." Danny said softly.

"I've been in a coma for two years? Longer?"

"No Miss….look…"

Missy laughed but it held no humour. "O this is where you tell me I have amnesia right? Wrong. I remember who I am where I live. Karl. My family my parents all of you! Nice try…next!" Missy scoffed. Danny pulled out his phone

"Look Miss the kids are outside coming in so play along. I'll explain everything later. I don't want them scared. Please Miss." Danny asked.

She was just about to explain that she wanted everything explained now when all the ids trooped in. all 7 of them. Missy recognised one of them. Well she recognised them but they should be smaller. Younger. She took a deep breath.

"You ok Miss. I was so worried." Amie said and hugged her.

"Yeah Amie I'm good." she said as danny mouthed Amie over her head.

"Here's Ryan." Lexi handed him over.

Missy looked at him and felt a flare in her chest. She knew him. This was her boy. But her baby had Danny's face with her brown eyes. Love bloomed and she smiled at him.

"Hey there little man."

At the sound of his mothers voice Ryan smiled a toothless grin. Missy's heart melted. Shauna had mentioned that Danny was his father and the resemblance was undeniable. She still found that weird. Impossible even. She felt too much love for her best friend to betray her with her husband. Even if she had passed away. That was it. Simple!

"How do you feel Miss?" Lexi asked shiftily.

"Pretty good. My head feels like it's been split in two different parts then screwed back together like but apart from that I'm real good." she smiled.

"How did you fall down the stairs Miss? And how did you hit the back of your head?" Daniel asked. That bit had bugged him if she fell she would have hit the front of her head right?

Missy felt the sensation of free falling through the air. But before that she felt an impact hit her chest. She frowned. "A push. I didn't fall. I was pushed." she murmured her frown deepening. She looked at Shauna. "Why would someone wanna push me down the stairs?"

Shauna looked at Lexi and glared then turned back to Miss. Missy looked at Lexi who had put her face in her hands. No one noticed except Missy. Lexi exhaled and removed her hands.

'You?' Missy asked silently.

Lexi nodded a little.

Missy was suddenly unexplainably angry Lexi had gone too far this time Any disagreements. Arguments. Spats she was more then happy to go to her and let off steam…but pushing her down some stairs? Dramatic even for Lex she didn't deserve that! She ignored Lexi, exhaled a hostile breath. She way putting her foot down obviously something had went badly wrong if Lexi thought that is was ok to push someone down the stairs!

Miss?" Shauna asked at her intense face.

"I'm tired." she said stiffly. She wanted to be by herself. Finding out her best friend was dead and then her niece tried to break her neck was too much!

Lexi shot her an apologetic look but again she blanked her. "I'm just gonna sleep. I'll see you all later ok."

"C'mon kids." Danny understood the finality to her tone. Shauna too Ryan. Missy gave him one last smile as he looked intensely at Shauna.

Everyone left her room and she relaxed and closed her eyes. Maybe if she went to sleep she'd wake up later and all this would be a bad dream!


	85. D34 Truly Lost It

Missy came awake slowly. Took an inventory her head was still pounding, not as much so that was a plus. She remembered everything. It had returned to her in a flurry of fractured images…well memories. Her nightmare too, she remembered that. Looked at her wrist and blinked to clear her eyes. She couldn't believe it! On her wrist was a purple bruise in a complete circle exactly where she had been yanking at her cuffs. She felt nerves flutter through her and disregarded it. Complete and utter coincidence Miss, that's all!

She had regained most of her memories she was sure but unfortunately the last thing she remembered was Shauna getting her out of the hospital in Jo'burg.

The phone call she had received from Danny telling her of Alice's death had been the first. The feeling of disbelief, I mean Alice is Alice! She didn't die. She is loud, opinionated, strong funny. Got herself in a inordinate number of scrapes but always, ALWAYS came out on top with a cocky grin and laugh. She remembered her chest aching. A member of her family had been taken away at the worst possible time. Their little trio of friends had been fractured, Missy playing go between. It had showed her and Shauna the value of each other and never leaving with bad words hanging but it had been too late for Alice, and that still ate away at Shauna she knew.

"Alice find a way please. Talk to her. Forgive her. She loves you." Missy whispered.

'_I know.' Alice replied._

She still couldn't believe that she had fell for Danny. She sifted through her memories of being with him and smiled softly. Actually she now knew why she fell for him, he was so loveable. Infuriating at times, and smothering but still loveable. She remembered their first kiss and the way she had stumbled over her words, smiled widely. She fell for the whole person. Of course she also remembered the guilt and the self recrimination she felt. Feelings she wanted to embrace but tried so desperately to ignore and extinguish. Her being her though the harder she tried to get rid of them the more they affected her until he was so much in her head she was certain her was tattooed onto her brain! Something felt off to her right now though, she had a feeling she was missing something, something big. Something important.

Ryan, her baby. She was surprised that Danny trusted her to be near him. She groaned as she remembered her thoughts about him. How she had felt nothing about him. Voices telling him to harm him. The feeling that she was losing her mind! She winced at that feeling. Something she would rather forget. But worst of all was the incident with the gun. She had truly believed that if she shot herself in the head the voices would disappear and she would be fine. She dreaded to think what would have happened if Shauna had turned up and stopped her, coz she new that there was no way Danny, Lexi or Ethan was stopping her. She was too far gone and trusted no one. She had even thought Shauna was sent to send her mad for a second too. It was only the fact that she had known Shauna so long that she trusted her.

And Amie too. God how on earth could she have said those things to Amie. I mean God she's a child! AND she had been ready to take Lexi apart right there in front of Danny. She had been so calm about it rational. Like it was an everyday thing. She had really scared herself at what she was capable of doing if she lost it. Truly lost it! Wait a minute what happens if she had a relapse and she had threatened Amie again and Lexi was only protecting her? That changed everything. If that HAD happened then Lexi was fully justified in what she did and Missy would tell her next time to finish the job properly! She had a feeling that wasn't it. She just felt that her and Amie were still as close as ever. If her nightmare had been anything to go by anyway.

Right she was going home! She couldn't sit in this hospital bed any longer. It was making her feel more than a little nervous, reminded her of other hospitals she had been in. she vaguely remembered being woken and given pills. She was a no no on pills now. No drugs would pass her lips again even paracetamols. She had no tolerance for pain but she would rather suffer she had had enough pills to last her a lifetime!

(X)

A few hours later Missy climbed out of a taxi. Looked at the veranda stairs with a grimace there was still the dark red outline of her blood on the floor. Noticed the rock her head impacted and winced. No wonder she felt like she had been lobotomised! It was the size of a small country! God it's a wonder she had a head left! She closed her eyes and focused she was waling to the house thinking…..thinking of…. Blank! She remembered frowning but what she was thinking was unclear. And the next thing she felt the air whoosh from her lungs and she was flying through the air. Everything around her a blur, proving her fast and hard she had been hit. All this courtesy of - Lexi. She didn't wanna talk to her right now. She'd wait til she had all the facts. She had blanks and didn't want to make any assumptions. She loved Lexi, don't get her wrong but how else was she supposed to deal with it? What was she supposed to say?

It's fine Lexi it's ok that you nearly broke my neck, sure I forgive you kid maybe next time I'll help you huh? She thought sarcastically.

She was really struggling to believe that Lexi would deliberately push her down some stairs - but she is hot headed and impulsive! Maybe she made the decision in a split second and then thought afterwards what have I done. She and Lexi had always been really close. She had made sure that Lexi knew that she was always here and that no matter what she told her she wouldn't reveal it even under threat of death. Which Alice would have done if she knew the stuff Lexi had said! God she had always been here and that is what was confusing her!

She groaned. All this analysing and going in circles was making her head hurt! The next subject she thought of wasn't much better, Shauna telling her about Alice. Had the woman not heard if tact! I mean a little gentleness wouldn't have gone astray either! As far as she had been concerned Alice had been alive and well. She was then told that not only had her best friend died but she had not only fell for her husband but had a child with him as well! Talk about an overload!

Being locked away hadn't been nice either. And then coming back and having it hanging over her head again! It had been like reliving it at first. The smells and the sounds. The feeling of the hospital blankets. The hard unyielding restricting fabric. She shivered slightly although it wasn't cold. Nurses waling in unannounced, giving her drugs while she was asleep so she couldn't stop them. She had to get out of there! She wasn't far from completely freaking out! She had signed herself out on the assurance that if she died she wouldn't sue the hospital. Well of course she wouldn't be suing the hospital she'd be too busy being dead dur! She remembered Shauna breaking her out and her final memory was being asleep in the hotel finally feeling safe and cared for. The rest except for falling down the stairs was non existent. She wondered how much time she was actually missing a day? A week? A month? Couldn't be much longer than that. Ryan after all was still every young.

She was very eager to see Danny. It had been so long, if felt like ages since she well in a word remembered her feelings. She hoped she hadn't hurt him too much in the hospital with her words and actions. Pushing him away et cetera. Especially since she at first thought hadn't particularly liked him too much - well they had annoyed ach other and rubbed each other the wrong way when they first met. It was because they were very similar in temperament and sense of humour. It seemed that the difference between love and dislike had a very fine line.

She smiled at the way Ryan had frowned at Shauna as she picked him up. He had looked so much like his father then he had frowned like he couldn't figure her out. She had been half tempted to tell him not to worry she had been trying to figure Shauna out for the last 40 years and she still didn't have a clue! He just couldn't seem to work her out, just stared intensely. God a baby frowning Missy had never seen anything like it at all! She had Shauna murmuring to him on the way out. Told him he was serious like his daddy and as he grew older no doubt his mothers madness gene would kick in and that he was doomed and had been since before he was even born.

(X)

Right Missy had stalled long enough lost in thoughts. It was time to go inside and see her family. She walked up the stairs cautiously. Keeping her eyes open.

"I'm home." she called walking through the house.

Lexi was sat at the kitchen table. Missy forgot she had told her self to reserve judgement. "O you're here." Missy said dryly.

"Missy don't be like that with me huh?" Lexi asked.

"Maybe I don't wanna be anyway with you Alexis!" putting emphasis on her given name. showing her the difference in their closeness and their previous relationship without having to say it.

"Miss….." Lexi started.

"Where is everyone?" Miss asked stiffly.

"Dad and Ethan took everyone to McDonalds. You just missed them actually. They left Ryan and Ethan Junior here with me and Shauna. She is down the surgery sorting an order form for dad. Ryan had just went down to sleep. He was being a little crabby."

"Well I'm here now so I'll sort him!" Missy told her. Had a feeling of saying that before. But in a different context.

"Miss I really need to talk to you. Try and explain."

"Well I don't want to Lex. I'm sick of people using me as a target. I don't want it anymore. It's doing my head in! Literally! I know I brought it on myself always allowing it but now it is starting to go too far. Lexi you pushed me down some stairs! What have I ever did to make you push me down some freaking stairs!" Missy stated angrily.

"I didn't push you. But it was my fault it happened." Lexi told her.

"What you accidentally knocked me down some stairs. I've been unconcious for a while you could have came up with a better excuse than that kid!" Missy said incredulous.

"Yeah actually that is what happened. I was running out of the house. Heard my name called and looked back I was still moving. We collided. Momentum made you fall down the stairs."

Missy sat down and looked at Lexi. "Lex if you have a problem with me tell me. You wanna take a swing at me for upsetting you fair enough I'll protect myself. But pushing someone down the stairs Lex. Do you realise you could have killed me?"

"I wouldn't hurt you Miss. Your family. My kids godmother. My little brothers mum. My step mum. Amie and Daniel need you as much as Ryan does. I still need you too. Why would I take you from them? From dad?" Lexi asked.

"I dunno Lex. Maybe you just don't like me. What did I ever do to make you dislike me so much? Is it because I..." there was a pause as Missy thought. "I dunno I'm wracking my brains and I can't think of anything I could ever do that would make you do that!"

"Miss don't talk like this…."

"No I think I should. Everyone. Your dad, your mum, Shauna, you. My brothers and sisters. Everyone always takes everything out on me. Takes pot shots at me then expecting me to smile and be happy about it. There is only so much one person can take and I hit my limit a long time ago!" Missy fumed.

"Dad told me what he said. What he did. I got the wrong end of the stick with you. You withheld information Miss. Lied to me. You should have told me!" Lexi said passionately.

"So because I lied you push me down stairs?" Missy raised her voice.

"Miss you should have told me that dad kissed someone else. I would have understood."

Missy paled but Lexi missed it.

"Plus the thing he said was well out of order." Lexi continued. "He should never have told you that Ryan was better off without you!"

"What?" Missy said coldly.

Lexi realised her mistake. She had assumed she remembered everything. They wouldn't have let her come home otherwise. "Um. nothing."

Missy eye's zeroed on Lexi. "Don't lie to me Lex. I want you to repeat what he told you!"

"No. He should tell you." Lexi told her stubbornly.

Missy banged her fists off the table. "I'm asking you so TELL ME!" she yelled.

"And I said no!" Lexi replied standing up.

Missy followed suit. "I will only as you once more to tell me Lex!"

"Then what?" Lexi asked. "You'll use other means?"

Missy's eyes narrowed. Lexi crossed her arms. Missy moved quickly and held Lexi against the fridge. "Tell me now!" her eyes were black.

"NO Miss." Lexi said calmly. "Coz you'll go mad. If I tell you I have no idea how you'll react."

"Is what you said true?" Missy asked.

Lexi stayed quiet. Missy too it as an affirmative. She released Lexi and paced agitatedly. Why would Lexi lie about such a thing? Her head and hands were shaking. Shauna walked in saw Missy and paled.

"Miss." Lexi started. Stopped when she saw the deadly look Missy gave her at her single word.

"oh no!" Shauna whispered as she watched her friend. She looked ready to kill.

"Lex." Shauna walled cautiously towards them. "Go sit with the kids yeah. She is gonna blow her stack." Shauna warned. "Just go in the room and no matter what you hear stay with the kids. Call your dad get him home NOW! Actually no make sure he keeps the other kids away. They don't need to see her go mad!"

"I know your whispering about me!" Missy seethed.

Lexi stared at Shauna. Shauna actually looked scared as she glanced at Miss. "Shauna?"

"Lex I have only seen her like this once before. Nothing will stop her, do you hear what I'm saying? The kids need you ok! Don't come out or she might turn on you too!"

"Turn?" She squeaked. "Shauna….I can't….not if she'll…you.."

Shauna grabbed her hand dragged her down to the bedroom where the kids lay asleep pushed her in the room. "Stay Lex!" then noticed the lock. Pressed it.

Shauna inhaled. Pressed her head against the cold door. What doesn't kill you make you stronger Shauna! She just had to make sure that Miss didn't kill her. She was capable of it when she was like this. She returned to the kitchen. She so better appreciate this! God the look on Miss face! She was so gonna tear her apart!

"Miss." she said softly. Making sure there was distance between then and the table.

Missy continued pacing and muttering. It was short and jerky. She was bound tightly ready to spring.

"Miss." Shauna repeated walked towards her and hazarded a hand on her arm. She hoped she didn't tear her arm right off!

Missy spun and removed her hand forcefully. "Did YOU know?"

"You told me." Shauna said.

"And you didn't think to tell me Shauna?" she hissed.

"What to see you acting like this no way! You're a psycho when you get going Miss and I could do without it to be honest!"

Missy was suddenly in her face. "What did you just call me?"

"A perfectly sane person!" Shauna told her calmly. Don't bother pushing her Shauna she won't take it well!

"Good!" Missy resumed pacing. "When I find out who she is. She's dead! Do you know?" Missy asked.

"No." Shauna lied.

Missy stared at her.

"You do know Shauna. Tell me!" Missy was staring at her.

Shauna backed off. "I swear Miss I don't have a clue!"

Missy threw a chair out of the way. "Tell me Shauna!"

Hearing the clatter Lexi banged on the door.

"Maybe Lex knows." Missy murmured.

"No…" Shauna's mind scrambled for a name. "He kissed Shauna!" oh shit! She had meant to say Sandra. She moved and made sure the table was between them again.

"You kissed Danny?" Missy asked. Turned on her absolutely gone. Enraged. She obviously wasn't thinking clearly. If she was she'd have known that Shauna had no interest in Danny what so ever!

"Missy I have James" Shauna said worriedly. Laughed nervously. Missy moved around the table. Shauna moved the opposite way.

"Why Shauna then?" Missy asked.

"Coz I really had to keep you away from Lex and I said the wrong name."

"Shauna!" Missy yelled. Picked up a cup and threw it. It whizzed passed Shauna's head as she ducked.

"Look Miss your scaring me so back off yeah!" Shauna told her.

"Maybe I'll rip your head off!" Missy fumed.

That's what she was afraid of. "Please Miss. Just calm down yeah!"

Missy's breathing was erratic. She again began to pace. "I should…I will…." her thoughts ran so quickly that she didn't sink in. she had to hurt the people who hurt her. That as all she knew! She turned towards the door. Shauna knew by her face she was going to pick a fight. She moved quickly. Stood in front of her. Don't kill me! she pleaded silently.

"Move Shauna. Move now!"

"Promise me you won't have a fight with a random innocent bystander!" Shauna negotiated.

"I'm not in the mood Shauna!" Missy yelled.

"I know you Miss. I know what your going you do!" Shauna told her.

"Move before I do something I regret!" Missy warned.

O God this is it! Missy had made her final threat. Shauna hadn't heard her make one she hadn't followed through on! Alice I know your there find it in God's infinite wisdom for her not to maul me too badly. Or kill me. Or break any bones. Just save me if she loses it yeah?

Shauna too a deep breath. "No Miss. If you want me to move then you'll have to make me!"

Missy's eyes were black. She didn't hesitate pinned her against a wall. "I warned you Shauna!" she said coldly.

Here it comes. I'll be seeing you Alice. In person in about a minute!

Shauna exhaled loudly and waited for the inevitable. A shrill high pitched cry filled the air. Missy froze.

"Ryan?" she whispered. Looked around. "Ryan?" then she looked at Shauna's resigned face. Gasped in shock at what she had been about to do.

Things happened extremely fast after that. Lexi crashed through the bedroom door worried by the silence that had fallen. Missy released Shauna who promptly hit the floor in a faint.

"Shauna I'm sorry I…" Missy began bending over.

Lexi was beside her in a second. "What the hell have you done to her?" she hissed at Missy. "Shauna can you hear me?"

"I didn't touch her Lex I swear." Missy said staring at her friend. A baby began to whimper. "I'll see to him."

"It might be…." Lexi started.

"Don't Lex. You now I'd never harm the kids." Missy said calmly. "You know me better than that!" she was completely calm. The sound of the babies cries had calmed her immediately.

Missy walked away and Lexi focused on Shauna. "Shauna wake up."

Shauna began to stir.

"Tell me where it hurts Shauna." Lexi murmured.

"The back of my head." she groaned.

Lexi checked her pupils.

"Did Missy hit you off the wall?"

Shauna was quiet. "She hadn't hit me yet." covered her face with her hand. Missy had been about 2 seconds from talking her apart piece by piece. She exhaled.

"Would she have done it?" Lexi asked worriedly.

Shauna was save from answering. Missy came running in holding a limp Ryan in her arms.

**A/N Miss defo needs anger management! & & & :O what is wrong wi Ryan? x**


	86. D35 Happy Ending For All?

**Good Charlotte - Wounded (Missy POV)**

_So you come along_  
_I push you away._  
_Then kick and sceam for you to stay_  
_Coz I need someone to help me_  
_To help me fill these wounds_  
_They been open for way too long_  
_Help me fill this hole_  
_Even though this is not your fault_  
_That I'm open and I'm bleeding_  
_All over your brand new rug_  
_And I need someome to help me sew them up._

(X)

Missy was nearly hysterical as she looked at the unresponsive Ryan. "Something's wrong!" she panicked.

Shauna was on her feet and looked at him. "He's asleep Miss."

"He won't wake up Shauna!"

"Let me." Lexi said.

She looked Ryan over and paled noticed symptoms. "Right we have to get him to hospital right now! Shauna will you get EJ and phone dad! Miss he should be ok!"

"Should?" Missy squeaked tears in her eyes.

Missy strapped him in his car seat. Sat beside him and stroked his forehead. "Lex he's burning up!" tears were sliding down her face. Ethan was in the other car seat. Shauna hopped in the front and started the car. Lexi was in the other front seat leaning between the gap and monitored him. She glanced at Shauna.

Lexi ensured that Missy was busy with Ryan, leaned close to Shauna. "Meningitis." she whispered on a breath.

Shauna paled.

Lexi nodded. "It's that bad!" she said on a breath.

"Lex he isn't breathing!" Missy panicked.

"He is Miss he is. Just in shallow little pants. Look at his chest!"

Shauna rang Danny on her hands free. Lexi was again seeing to Ryan.

"Danny get to the hospital!" she demanded.

"Sorry Shauna it's heaving in here. My reception is crap too. Can you repeat what you said?"

The line crackled and popped.

"Your son is in hospital seriously ill!" she yelled.

"What? Stand still? Shauna I'll call you back later when I'm out of here ok."

"No don't….Dammit Danny!" Shauna fumed as he disconnected.

(X)

They arrived at Jo'burg. They rushed into A&E.

"My son is ill!" Missy said frantically.

Lexi was beside her as the baby was handed over. "Suspected meningitis, pulse thready, respiratory distress. Completely unresponsive." Lexi followed the doctors barking her observations at them.

Shauna rushed in carrying EJ. Missy had tried to follow.

"They won't let me in Shauna I can't see him!" She said tearfully.

"Let the do their jobs Miss." Shauna told her calmly. She knew how close Missy was to falling to pieces.

"Why didn't Lexi tell me how serious he was?" Tears were running from her eyes.

Lexi walked towards her. Steered her towards an empty corridor, she was standing crying in the middle of a crowded waiting room.

"I noticed something was up in his room. He was really warm and was lethargic. The reason why I busted the door. We got him here early. I was distracted by Shauna though."

Missy felt guilt build in her chest.

Shauna handed EJ to Lexi. "I'll go call your dad." she told her.

Missy meanwhile paced and cried silently.

Shauna walked back in annoyed. "How long does it take for one man to get a McDonalds?" she fumed.

"Melissa Lynch?" a doctor walked towards them. She was beside him in a second. "It's me. How is Ryan?"

"He's a very poorly little boy but we have him stabilised and we are giving him a course of treatment. Your promptness in getting him helped save his life."

"Is he gonna…." she asked panicking again.

The doctors face turned pensive. "He isn't out of the woods yet. We are closely monitoring him for possible complications."

"I need to see him!" she stressed.

"I'll take you through only two at a time please."

"Shauna you go with Miss I'll try and get in touch with dad." Lexi told her.

Shauna nodded and followed Missy. They were taken into the baby unit. A nurse was over Ryan and they couldn't see him. Missy hurried forward and gasped as she saw him. "Oh my poor little man." she whispered and put her hand over her mouth as more tears filled her eyes. Her vision blurred.

Ryan lay in a crib surrounded by monitors and machines. His temperature, heart rate and respiratory rate were all being monitored. He had tubes in his nose and hand. Missy choked back a sob went over and touched his face softly.

"I'm here now son. Mummy's here." Tears fell from her eyes.

Shauna put her arm around her waist. "I'm here for you Miss." her eyes moist.

"How's he gonna beat this Shay? He's so small!" she whispered.

"Coz he's yours Miss. He's a fighter. He'll never give up. Little things come in better bundles Miss."

Missy swallowed thickly and pulled a char beside his crib. Talked to him softly. A nurse appeared thirty minutes later and Shauna went to speak to her.

"See you at home Miss." she whispered.

Missy didn't even realise she was gone. Just held Ryan's small pale hand. She rubbed her thumb over the back of it continually. She couldn't look at his other hand. It had a tube in it with a nasty purple bruise on it.

(X)

Danny walked in looking pale. He gasped and put his hands on his knees when he saw his son. Rubbed his face and he stood upright again. Missy didn't look at him just continued mumbling to Ryan.

"Miss." he breathed waling towards her.

Missy continued talking to Ryan. "And Goldilocks ran from the three bears house and they never saw her again. After that the bears all lived happily ever after." she sniffed. "You'll be better soon son."

Danny sat beside her and clasped her free hand with his. More tears fell from her eyes.

"How's he been?" Danny asked.

"He hasn't moved at all. The nurses come in often and write something down on the clipboard."

"Has anyone told you anything?" He asked.

"Lexi said suspected meningitis." she said biting her lip.

Danny nodded and paled. "He's a fighter Miss. He has Alice on his side too."

Missy just stared at her baby, continued to rub the back of his hand with her thumb.

(X) 8 Hours Later

Danny was nodding on and off in his chair. He was mostly over his illness but he still felt tired. He was fighting every step of the way but Missy knew he couldn't hold out much longer. She had tried to convince him to go home but he wasn't having any of it. She was still sat holding Ryan's hand telling him stories of what she was like as a child.

"My mum and dad would have been so proud of you. They always wanted me to have a child they said I'd be a good mum. I wasn't so sure back then. I'm doing my best for you though I promise. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me. Better than Alice and Shauna. Better than your dad. Better than anything I have ever done or accomplished in my life."

She sat quietly and viewed her son's profile. Smiled softly.

"Now that I think about it you look like my dad. Same stubborn strong jaw. You inherited our eyes too. Your granddad Lynch, he was sorta old fashioned. He'd have taken one look at you and said strong boy. Get him into rugby Melissa." she voiced in a gruff voice. It didn't hurt to think of her dad anymore. "That was your granddad all over. Boxing and rugby. Men's sports. So we'll see what you like when your older and we'll see what groups we can get you into huh?"

He slept on eyes closed.

"Your granddad didn't think much of football. All pansy's, soft as clarts. A tap and they roll all over the pitch like they have been impaled by a spike. Pretty brutal description huh? That's another trait of his. Exaggeration." she sat and pondered her dad. Mourned the distance that existed between them when he had died. She hadn't seen or spoke to her father for…. she lost count of the amount of years before he died.

"He would have loved you though. Mum told me that he never told me but he was secretly proudest of me because I was the most like him. I stood up for myself and took no rubbish. As you grow older you'll see that I am a lot like him. He was loud, opinionated, stubborn but soft as butter inside. I realised all this too late." she said sadly.

"Miss?" Danny said groggily at her tone. "Is it Ryan?"

"It's ok Danny, he's fine."

He exhaled and rubbed his eyes resting back on his chair. "What happened with you and your dad?" he asked yawning.

She opened her mouth to answer nothing when he arched a brow at her.

She exhaled. "We weren't talking when he died. Hadn't spoke for a long time. We were…are very alike. He was….I dunno. Not necessarily strict but he had expectations and I was the first born so it felt like I could never fail." she looked at the floor. Gathered her thoughts. Then looked at him. "To be honest he never looked at me the same after Andy and I always had to go that extra mile to…I dunno try to remove the stigma that I was sure he saw when he looked at me. He couldn't deal with it which in turn made it harder for me to deal with it. It's hard when you see the truth written all over your fathers face you know."

Danny nodded. "Did you argue?"

She smiled and laughed a little though it held no humour. "Did we argue? It's all we ever did from the day I came home from hospital. He stressed me out you know. With his…." she exhaled. "Just the way he looked at me" she rubbed the back of her neck. "He didn't even realise it I used to tell him not to look at me like that and he would say he wasn't doing nothing and then we'd row."

Danny nodded again.

"Anyways I always felt like I had something to prove to him. He disliked that I just left and travelled for a dew years when I was 17. Then returned and flitted from job to job. I had no idea what I wanted to do and he was critical. Those expectations. Again we rowed. He blamed me for the divorce and said he wished I'd never been born." she exhaled. We fell out but we made up coz it was what mum wanted. We steered clear of each other after that though. We didn't get along and we knew it. Thing was I worshipped him when I was little. He was my big strong daddy you know and he said he didn't want me."

"Miss…."

"I know he didn't mean it Danny it just hurt you know? Like I said I flitted around jobs I had been just sitting in a friends who had just moved in and she and her boyfriend were talking about decorating. And an idea came to me. I talked to her but she couldn't see it so I did I quick sketch and she loved it. Told her friends and I did some for them. They loved it. Seems I had finally found something I was good at. So I started my little business which I was very protective and proud of. It was hard at first. Barely made any money. Making a name for myself. I went down to see mum and he came in from the pub the second he saw me I knew we were gonna go off. I tried to walk out but he wanted to talk to me, he brought up my business mum must of mentioned I wasn't doing to well. We had this blazing argument. He told me that he knew I'd fail coz everything I touched went wrong. Again he didn't mean it but it hurt. My mum tried to stop him but he'd had a couple of drinks and he brought up Andy. He really couldn't have hurt me more. Which I found out later at his funeral is what he wanted. He didn't necessarily want to hurt me just provoke some feeling. He had spoke to some trainee counsellors who specialised in this guy called Perls who did Gestalt. Like confrontational therapy. They got it all wrong by the way. Anyway apparently the way I was dealing with it wasn't healthy and the….subject needed aired as a family. So we could move on."

She shook her head sadly lost in her memories of that time. Her dad's face. Looking back she saw concern and love back then she had saw gloating and hatred.

"My dad bless him went about it the wrong way. And he was slightly drunk to boot! His hard headed daughter was too confrontational like him to deal with it like that! He started asking me why I didn't tell him what he was doing." Missy exhaled remembering her dad throwing questions at her like darts. "I didn't answer so he just kept throwing all these other questions at me so fast and my head was spinning! I couldn't deal with what he was doing and saying and I overloaded. Told him I didn't tell him coz he failed me. He failed to protect me and that I hated him as much as Andy. I left and we never spoke again. That was over 20 years ago." her face turned to one of pure sadness and grief. "I miss him. I hope he knows I'm sorry and I didn't mean it. That I love him and don't blame him."

"He's your dad Miss, he knew. Dad's and daughters share a bond. A special bond. He'd have forgot what you said."

"He never spoke to me again. I don't even think we had a bond anymore. Sometimes I used to thin he loved Sophie more than me. That was if he loved me at all." she admitted.

"Did you talk to him Miss?" he asked softly.

"Well no…but he didn't…." she realised. "I wasted all those years." she whispered.

"See your dad loved you and might have thought you didn't blame him but a small part of him might have believed that you did. That small part stopped him from talking to you. I went through something like that with Alice. Blamed myself with what happened with Josh. I suspected he only wanted her coz she was with me. He said he had feelings which I suspect did develop but not till later."

Missy nodded.

(X)

More time passed. Ryan moved his head slightly.

"Ryan. Ryan baby." Missy murmured. Danny on his feet beside her.

He opened one eye. Let out an ear splitting wail. His eyes flickered to the sound of her voice.

"Get the doctor Danny."

He rushed out and she rubbed his chest and murmured to him. His heartbreaking wails soon subsided.

Missy ran her finger down his cheek. "You'll be fine. Your awake now."his brown eyes looked at her sadly. She held his hand softly he grasped one of her fingers. The doctor walked in. She removed his hand and his face crumpled, he began to wail again as she walked away. The sound of his cries was almost her undoing and she tried to walk back over.

"He's fine Miss." Danny murmured and wrapped his arms around her from behind.

"I can't bear to bear him cry Danny it's killing me!"

Danny released her and grabbed her hand tightly. They stood waiting anxiously at the other side of the room.

The doctor walked over. "Well Mr and Mrs Trevanion."

Missy didn't contradict her. She just needed news of her son.

"Ryan is awake and alert and crying for you which is an extremely positive sign. Especially since he was completely unresponsive when he came in. He is still poorly but his progress so far has pleased me a lot."

"Thank you." Missy whispered.

Danny shook her hand. Missy went back over to Ryan's cot. He lay awake and was kicking his legs a little.

"Miss." Danny murmured. "He's getting better."

She nodded and sniffed. He spun her and enveloped her in his arms.

"I thought we were gonna lose our little boy Danny. Our baby." her voice cracked.

"I know. Me too." he admitted huskily.

"Nothing can ever happen to him Danny. I don't know what I'll do!"

"It's ok Miss. You'll upset yourself more thinking like that!" he murmured and pressed a kiss to her hair. They stood silent as time ticked by.

"I'm so sorry Danny. I've been so stupid."

"Tears aren't stupid Miss."

"Not the tears, " she looked up at him. "About you pushing you away."

"Miss you don't have to do this…." he started.

"Danny I love you and need you. I'm sorry honey. I don't care about the past I wanna wipe the slate clean and all of us be together as a family. If you still want to that is."

"There is nothing I want more." he pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her tightly. "I do have to say my own sorry's, and I promise that it won't happen again. Any of it."

"Now it's over." she told him. They then turned hand and hand to look at their son.

(X)

Missy yawned tiredly. "Miss your shattered darling. Go home." Danny coaxed.

"No I'm good." she assured him.

"For me?" he asked.

She looked at his concerned face. "I do need to talk to Shauna."

"You have a meeting too." he said seriously.

"Really?" She asked confused. "With who?"

"Bed" he retorted with a grin.

She rolled her eyes and he leaned over and kissed her softly. "He'll be fine." he promised.

She hugged him and felt his warmth and strength envelope her.

"I'm happy we have this back." she murmured against his neck.

"Me too. You mean everything to me Miss. I hope you now that."

She gave him a last squeeze. Pressed a kiss to a sleeping Ryan's head and then turned to leave.

"How about I send in Lex? As soon as he is moved from the baby's intensive care unit he'll be allowed more visitors."

He nodded and waved. She walked out.

(X)

Missy brought the car to a halt outside Leopards Den. Lexi was walking outside. She scuffed the toe of her boot off the floor of the veranda when she saw Missy.

"Lex your dad mentioned for you to go see Ryan." she said breezily.

Lexi nodded. "Miss I…"

"Don't say it Lex. It's all sorted yeah? Clean slate. It was a accident although I kinda still don't remember but anyways I sorta over react sometimes." she grinned cockily. "Plus your not big enough to toss me down some stairs."

Lexi nodded. Missy walked p the stairs. Lexi hugged her. "I still love you Miss and I am SO big enough to throw you down some stairs."

"Lets not test the theory huh? And by the way kid I still love you too." she hugged her. "Now can you leave me and Shauna I need to….." she made a so on gesture. "Maybe let her pound on me a little." she whispered.

Lexi nodded and climbed in the car. She turned back and Missy tossed her the keys. She caught them one handed

Missy walked into the house and saw Shauna sat in the kitchen. Shauna looked at her.

Missy shot her a charming I'm so sorry smile. "uh uh?" she asked.

Shauna shook her head. Missy sat opposite her. They looked at each other in silence.

"How's Ryan?" Shauna asked

"Really good. Kicking his legs about. Noisy. I've never been happier to hear him cry." she admitted.

"That's good." Shauna murmured.

They lapsed into silence again.

"Shauna…" Missy began.

Shauna put her hand in the air to silence her.

"I guess this is where you say we won't be seeing each other anymore?" Missy asked softly.

"Miss, for the first time in 40 years I was scared you were gonna hurt me. Have you any idea how that feels? And the worst part of it was I was trying to help you! You didn't hesitate to push me against that wall!" she rubbed her face.

"I don't know what to tell you Shauna. You know I love you to bits. I was wrong."

"You scared me Miss." she said finally.

"I know."

"Don't do it again!" Shauna told her.

"I swear never!" Missy promised.

"And sign 75 percent of your business over to me!" she said grinning.

"Get stuffed." Missy replied. "I'm not THAT sorry!"

Shauna shrugged. "Worth a try. I'm happy that Ryan is ok. I owe that boy alot. You were about to break every bone in my body when he cried."

"I can't even begin to describe…." Missy trailed off. "The alternative to him not getting better doesn't bear thinking about." she added shaking her head.

Shauna nodded.

"Me and Danny are having another go too." Missy smiled.

"You sure this is what you want Miss?" Shauna stressed.

"I love him Shay. I always will." she said simply.

"Don't let him mess you around Miss."

"I won't Shay. Anyway how are you here?"

"I heard you were hurt and came straight over. I swear Miss you are gonna be the death of me. Every time Danny phones me I expect to be hearing your hurt or dead. It's worse now than when we were kids. You need a bodyguard to save you from yourself."

"Thanks Shay." she said dryly.

"Hey I came to make sure you were ok. I was worried!" she told her.

"Shauna flying to the rescue huh?" Missy drawled.

She nodded smiling. Then an idea struck her. "So then Melissa…." Shauna started.

"oooo that Melissa sounded ominous!"

"Well you and Danny are back together." she stated.

"Yes." Missy answered.

"And you have a baby?"

"Yes." Missy again answered.

"Do I get to plan your wedding?" she asked sweetly.

"Ye…" she nearly answered.

Shauna grinned widely "Your over your aversion to marriage!" she whooped.

"Maybe in the future." she told her.

"So that's a yes. Your gonna get married?"

Missy groaned. She was never gonna hear the end of this.

"I got so many ideas Miss. For dresses and a cake. And flowers…."

Missy toned Shauna out. 'See what you left me to Alice? Save me please! She won't stop!'

'_Have fun my friend.' _Alice laughed musically in her head.

'God help me' Missy asked.

'_I'll have a word for you.'_ Alice said still laughing.

'Thanks for watching over Ryan.'

'_No question Miss.' Alice whispered then quieted._

As Shauna talked and Missy ignored Alice's laughter echoed throughout the entire house. A peace fell and all was well.

The End.

**A/N ok people one final chapter after this. danice fluff as promised 2 cloloveswah :) i tried anyways. hope u enjoyed and thanks 4 reading x**


	87. D36 Home

The whole of the family were piled in a mini van in Glasgow.

"You do realise we are all tanned and it's November." Alice muttered.

"I'm freezing!" Amie declared. Shivered for effect.

"That is British weather for you." Danny drawled. "How did we ever survive here for so long Alice?"

She smiled at him. Amie had plenty of layers and was still sat shivering in the back.

"I hate the cold!" she moaned. "I wanna go home where it's hot."

"Hey this was mum's and dad's home when we were your age. Well my home. Dad lived in Bristol."

"And your still alive?" she asked in horror. "How come you didn't freeze to death?"

Daniel rolled his eyes at her exaggeration. "I can't wait to have a snow ball fight with dad!" he said eagerly.

"You sure your prepared Daniel. I have tactics and an ambush planned!" Danny grinned cockily.

"How old are you?" Alice whispered.

"He started it!" he murmured back.

Alice tutted then grinned. "I'll make sure he doesn't hurt you too bad."

"What makes you think he'll win?" Danny asked.

"If he doesn't honey," she said sweetly. "You'll deal with me."

He made a scared face. "He'll win!" he said seriously.

"Can't believe how long we were stuck in the airport for!" Daniel muttered.

"I know I was cold!" Amie declared.

"We know Amie!" Everyone in the car declared.

"We only heard it ten million times!" Daniel added. She made a face and hit him in the arm. He hit her back. They were hitting each other in the back of the car.

"Kids!" Alice warned in her no nonsense tone of voice.

They stopped. They had had problems getting into the country. She, Danny, Ethan and Lexi were all still classed as British citizens and had British passports but Daniel, Amie and Zoey were South African. Not classed as British citizens. After filling out a million forms and having their identification checked and re checked they were finally allowed in the country.

"Trust Miss to chose a November christening for Ebony. And we're godparents so we can't NOT be here." Danny muttered.

Alice looked at Lexi who looked ill. "Lex your looking green baby." she smiled slightly she knew what was wrong. She was reminded of 9 years ago. When they went to Leopards Den for the first time.

Lexi nodded. Ethan handed her bottled water which she sipped. "Just ill off the flight."

"Why lie Lex me and your dad aren't daft." she whispered.

"I'm flipping daft!" she groaned.

"How far gone are you?" Alice asked.

"15 weeks."

"I knew you were getting fat!" Daniel declared. High fived Amie. Lexi glared at them.

"Lexi are you sure you only 15 weeks?" Alice asked. She then looked at Ethan. He looked like the cat who had the cream. "Tell them Lex!" he said smugly.

"I'm glad your excited!" she moaned.

"What?" Alice asked.

"The doctor….he said….God I can't even say it!"

"Twins!" Ethan declared. "Two!" he grinned.

Danny and Alice shared a look "There are twins in my family. Distant cousins." he said.

Lexi looked at her dad "You mean this is your fault? How could you?"

"Um, I'm sorry?" he said with a grin.

"O you will be dad." she warned. "You SO will be!"

"You can't blame it all on your dad honey!" Ethan said still looking stupidly pleased with himself.

"No I blame you too!" she declared.

"Me?" he asked. "What did I do?"

"What did you do? We agreed to try for another baby. As in one. Singular!" she said to him.

"C'mere honey." put his arm around her. "Your hormones all over?"

"Yes." she sniffled. "And I need some marmite!"

Everyone pulled equal faces of disgust.

They pulled up to a large house. Alice's jaw dropped.

Danny whistled softly as he climbed out of the car. "She couldn't get a much bigger house could she?"

They all trudged up the path in the snow. Daniel picked up a bit of snow and threw it at Amie who squealed then ducked. She then glared.

"I like snow!" he said.

"Hey Ames me and you will make some snow angels later huh?" Alice asked at her disgusted face.

"Is is warm?" she asked.

"Not exactly"

"Well I'm staying in the house next to a radiator wrapped in a couple of blankets." she retorted.

Alice smiled and kissed her daughters head. She rang the door bell. Missy opened the door with a huge grin on her face.

"Twins!" Ethan blurted as soon as the door open.

Missy frowned comically "Sorry Ethan you'll have to tell your twin brother I'm taken. Happily married in fact."

He made a face at her.

Missy invited them all in.

"Aah warmth!" Amie said and hugged a radiator.

"Hey Karl." Danny called and shrugged out of his coat.

"No fighting over me Danny!" Missy said sweetly. Ever since the book it had gave her something else to annoy him with.

"I'll try my best!" he said seriously.

"You left me hanging too long Danny. Sorry I just couldn't wait." she winked with a grin at Alice.

"You got that package Alice?" Danny asked.

"Miss think fast!" Alice declared and threw a small box at her.

Missy caught it.

"It's a present for you." Daniel said watching football with Karl.

Missy tore off the wrapping. It was a book called 'Denial'

"Inside." Alice coaxed.

Missy flicked open there first few pages. "This book is dedicated to my friends Melissa. The source and inspiration for Another Life Another Time. My best friend. My sister and the best mum a kid could ask for. I will forever owe you for your unwavering love and support throughout the years. I'm always here for you Miss like I know you are always here for me too."

"Oh Alice." she whispered and pulled her close for a hug.

"I meant every word Miss. Me and Danny have named you as Amie's and Daniel's guardian if anything happens to us."

Her face crumpled. "Look you've gone and made me cry!" she whispered as tears fell.

Ebony then began to cry. "My niece!" Alice went over to the bassinet. Alice picked her up and rubbed her back. "Danny." she said sweetly

Danny looked.

Missy laughed.

"Uh, uh. No way. Nope. Just no!" he said quickly.

"Just a little one?" Alice asked. Her thumb and forefinger a tiny space apart.

Danny looked at Melissa. "See what you've done?" he asked playfully.

"I live to serve!" she retorted and walked into the kitchen.

"Look at her she's so cute!" Alice gushed.

"Tell you what." Danny said loud enough for Missy to hear, "Put her in your pocket when no one is looking when we leave." he suggested.

"Is that coz I'm taken Danny?" Missy quipped shaking a bottle.

"Oh yeah Miss. I can't cope!"

"Try. You have to Try!" she said dramatically. Approached with a bottle.

"Alice you know in your story." Danny started as the door bell rang. Shauna walked in.

"Why couldn't I have fell in love with Shauna? Why put me through Melissa?"

"Duh!" Missy broke in. "I'm better looking!"

"You wish Miss!" Shauna said taking her coat off and hugging her.

"I can't get my arms around you anymore." Missy said and pointed to her protruding stomach.

"So this is your new house Miss. Nice. Big." James said and went over shook Danny's hand.

"Me and Karl want a football team." Missy said. "Out striker is due in 7 and half months time!"

Shauna and Alice looked. Missy nodded. They squealed ran over and hugged her. Well Shauna hugged her and Alice smiled and continued feeding Ebony.

"We just found out this morning."

Alice shot Danny a look.

"You had to Miss." he said dryly. "And you too Shauna!"

"What can I say? Karl is irresistible!"

"You know we have you due in about 8 months. Shauna due in 2 months and.." Danny cleared his throat stopping Alice mid flow.

Lexi spoke up. "I'm pregnant too!"

"We're having twins!" Ethan declared excitedly.

"Lexi is due in just under 6 months." Alice finished. "Danny I feel left out." she grinned.

"You can stay feeling left out too. 4 kids is enough!"

Alice made a face and winded Ebony. Grabbed her camera and snapped a few pictures of her with Amie and Daniel, Lexi and Ethan. Then finally Zoey. Who tried to give her a big kiss.

"Careful sweetie" Lexi murmured.

"Baba." she said. "Kwiss."

Zoey was 1 and half and into everything. Her fathers daughter in everyway.

(X)

Alice walked into the kitchen. Missy motioned to Shauna who followed and closed the door. It was the first time they had seen each other face to face in along time. Alice hugged her tightly. "I've missed you Shauna."

"Me too Alice." they both wiped their eyes and sat at the island.

"You look good." Alice told her.

"I look huge." she replied dryly.

Alice smiled. "James chuffed?"

Shauna nodded. "Took a while. We got there though."

Alice knew what that felt like. Daniel and Amie shouldn't even be here! "I'm sorry I wasn't there to support you."

Missy walked into the kitchen. "Right what did I miss?"

"Just the usual." Shauna commented.

"Us insulting you." Alice finished.

"Your both just jealous coz I'm the intelligent beautiful funny one. You two can fight over whatever is left."

"How generous of you." Alice told her.

"Yeah I forgot that one." Missy said with a smile and sat down.

They chatted, laughed cried and caught up on each others lives.

"So my girlies what do you think of my book?" Alice asked eagerly.

"I love it!" Shauna declared. "I kicked ass!" she nodded appreciatively.

"Um Alice about that. How come I'm the insane one Alice? Hmmm my dear beloved friend. How come it wasn't…say um…you? And Shauna isn't exactly the paragon for sanity either. I think your just picking on me coz like I said beautiful funny…" she trailed off. "Admit it. I don't mind."

"Well Miss. Shauna has James and the twins. And the book was based at Leopards Den." Alice explained.

"You then?" She asked looking at Alice intently.

"Well Miss I was a little bit dead."

"I see your point." Missy said thoughtfully. "A bit hard. You could have found a way round it if you wanted to though."

Shauna frowned. "Miss she was dead."

"I'm just saying…"

"What night if the living dead?" Shauna supplied.

"NO." she said like Shauna was stupid. "Nights. Plural." she said grinning.

"Miss you just fit." Alice told her.

"What the insaneness?" she asked.

"Well yeah." Alice said simply.

"Don't lie Miss. We all know your mad. You love it!" Shauna declared.

"In the book you said I was the sanest Shauna." Missy countered.

"That's fiction." Shauna retorted quickly.

"Good save Shauna." Alice high fived her

They had fell right into the old banter straight away.

"So what next for me then Alice? Abducted by aliens? Going to Hollywood and becoming movie star? Marrying a gorgeous millionaire? I like my ideas. Better than going insane!" She muttered.

"At least mine are credible." Alice drawled smiling.

"If I wasn't sat down I'd kick your ass." she warned. "But I'm too lazy to pick myself out of my chair." they all laughed.

"Seriously what next Alice? Is there something?" Shauna asked.

Alice nodded smiling. "I'm excited about this one too. So is my editor."

"O god what you gonna do to me?" Missy drawled.

"Actually if I chose to write it it centres mostly on Daniel, Amie, Ethan and Lex. Mostly Daniel and Lexi. Lexi at the beginning. Daniel middle and Amie end. AND a new mystery character."

"Oooo I'm intrigued." Missy said.

"Tell me!" Shauna said.

Alice grinned and shook her head.

"Mean!" they chorused.

The heard a whistling sound.

"That's my cue ladies. Look out of that window." she pointed.

She hurried out of the door. They heard a war cry. Then saw Danny running. Missy and the kids following pelting him with snowballs.

"Declare defeat!" Missy crowed gave them a thumbs up as she passed.

"Never!" he yelled.

"Don't make us use these!" she yelled and pelted more.

Suddenly Lexi, Ethan and James appeared. Danny turned and grinned. Amie, Daniel and Missy froze. Danny bent down and picked up a huge snowball "This one has your name on it Miss."

"Really?" she asked.

He nodded.

"Retreat!" she yelled as snowballs rained over them. They ran like hell Danny and his cohorts following throwing snowballs.

"Last time I listen to you Miss!" Daniel grumbled as he ran ducking. His smile was huge. "We'll retreat and regroup. They have brawn we have the brains!" she told them.

Alice and Shauna watched as they hid behind a bush. Snowballs flying all over. "Bombs away!" Missy yelled and an array of snowballs flew. Danny and co dived for cover.

Missy stood up "I declare us the winner." Danny threw one and hit her in the face.

"I'll get you for that Trevanion!" wiping her face off.

"You always did talk too much Lynch!" he called back. I just corked your mouth!" he crowed.

"Cover me!" she whispered to the kids then disappeared.

A short whole later they heard "Reinforcements! I'm behind enemy lines." she used up her supply of snowballs. The kids came and pelted them into submission.

"Declare me as leader people. Ruler and Queen on Misstonia!"

"Never!" Danny said sat covered in snow. "Using my kids against me." he said breathing heavily with a smile.

"They love me. C'mon kids. Lexi I told you to join me. The winning side." she merely said and grinned. "Who needs anyone else when I have you two?" Daniel and Amie high fived her.

(X)

Missy returned a little while later. "He thwarted me at first!" she drawled.

"You lost your touch. School boy error Miss." Shauna said smiling.

"Hey I won didn't I?" Missy asked.

"You were more into it then the kids!" Alice declared. "Plus what was with all the yelling and the war cries?" Alice asked.

"Hey it WAS war and losing wasn't an option!" Missy said seriously.

"Retreat? Behind enemy lines?" Shauna said with a smile.

Missy shrugged.

"Why wasn't I invited?" Alice asked.

"Coz Shauna is 7 months pregnant and I couldn't leave her out. I wanted to ask you and the kids did too but it wasn't fair. Next year though" she smiled widely. "I have all year to plan! I'm gonna build a fort and everything!" she said seriously. She put the kettle on. "I'm frozen. But it was fun!"

"What pelting my husband with frozen objects?" Alice asked.

"Hey your kids helped!" Missy told her.

"O I let you off for coercing my kids into beating their father with snowballs."

"Great I knew you'd understand." Missy made hot chocolate for 9 people. "Karl got called away to work I just said goodbye to him." she exhaled. She put the drinks on a tray. "I'll be a minute."

"She hasn't changed has she?" Alice asked after she left.

"Not a whit. 40 years old and still having snowballs wars. Not fights. It was WAR!" Alice grinned.

Missy walked back in and yawned.

"So it's Ebony's christening tomorrow?"

Missy nodded. "And the 500 hundred people invited." Missy said dryly. "You'd think she's royalty. All I wanted was a few family. Karl? No way!"

"She's adorable." Alice gushed. "A proper mini Miss."

Missy smiled. "I hope not. But thanks."

"You ok?" Shauna asked. Missy didn't have to ask what she meant.

Missy nodded. "It's been easier than I thought."

"Other stuff?" Alice asked.

"Over it. A long time ago. I spoke to some people who put it in perspective."

Alice and Shauna nodded and hugged her, "As long as your happy Miss." they chorused.

(X) Later That Night.

Danny and Alice were sat in the back yard. The kids were fast asleep after a nice hot bath. Ethan and Lexi cuddled up watching a movie. Missy was having a bath and Karl was still at work. They were sat on a chair wrapped in a quilt. Alice was on Danny's knee and his arms were tight around her while she clutched the quilt. They shared kisses in the moonlight.

"Missy is happy." Alice stated.

"I'm happy." he told her and pulled her closer. She kissed him softly.

"I think the talk you and James had with Karl worked."

"Missy is the best. She deserves to be happy." he murmured and kissed her neck.

"Daniel Trevanion you so better not have a crush on my best friend!" she said playfully.

He exhaled. "When I look at Miss I see a pretty woman. When I look at you I see a gorgeous breath taking stunningly beautiful angel sent from God." he said sincerely.

"Charmer." she said with a smile.

"I try." he told her and kissed her again.

"Alice?" he said after a quiet moment.

"Yeah." she said and snuggled closer to him.

"Were you serious about Ebony?" he asked.

"What about another child? Na not really."

"Coz if you really have your heart set." he added.

"Don't worry Danny. Our babies/nappies sleepless nights days are long gone!"

"Thank God!" he whispered. She laughed.

"I love you Mrs Trevanion." he told her.

"I love you Mr Trevanion."

Danny suddenly laughed. "Missy pulled me aside you know. Said that at the christening I'm not allowed to kidnap the priest. It's Ebony's christening not our wedding." he chuckled "She told me to control myself. I replied that I didn't know I could and she shot back that she understood coz she was irresistible!"

Alice laughed heartily.

"We talked about your books too. She was really serious then. She was so honoured that not only did you chose to write about her but you also portrayed her so well and entrusted our kids to her. She got abit emotional."

"I'd put my life in her hands. that's how much I trust her. I know she'd love our kids like her own."

He nodded.

"It's weird seeing her all domesticated." Alice smiled.

"We don't do this enough." he murmured.

"What sit freezing to death outside?" she replied laughing.

"No just being a couple. Talking. Having a hug and some kisses without kids making an issue in disgust. It's really nice." he squeezed her tightly and she savoured it. He was right. They didn't spend much time alone anymore.

They lapsed into companionable silence. Looked at the stars.

"Mum feels close here." she murmured finally. "Didn't realise how away she felt till I came back."

He decided to take her mind off it. "Wait there." he murmured and disentangled himself from her and the quilt. He disappeared. Alice stood up.

"Danny." she called.

Suddenly a ball flew over. She spun chested it down and controlled it so it lay at her feet. He ran over.

"Hello." he grinned.

"Hello." she replied confused.

"I'm Danny. You must be new here. I'd have noticed you."

Alice got it. He was recreating their first meeting, not very well and they were in Glasgow….oh well

"Yeah I am new here. Gonna teach some lads how to play football. They're all rubbish!"

"You gonna start with me?" he asked seductively.

She flicked the ball into his arms.

"You bet." she grinned. He tossed the ball away as he pulled her close

"So Miss Collins have I scored?" he whispered against her ear. Kissed her softly.

"We both have!" she replied. Pulled his lips down to hers.

"This is the start of something beautiful!" he promised. He wasn't wrong!

They stood wrapped up in each other in snow covered England. Small flakes began to fall and covered them. They disregarded them. They both understood at that moment that it didn't matter where they were as long as they were together everything was and would always be….perfect.

**A/N hopefully that fluff was good enough. i just couldn't seem to do anything with it :/**

**cn i say i loved that snowball fight lol. missy is mad, married and a mother and still daft as a brush lol**

**i do have yet another story planned. called unexpected. not a nice one actually but it is based on Lexi Eth, Daniel, Amie, A mystery guest and Zoey ooooo**

**cna i just thank you all for reading something that was origninally only supposed to be about 5 chapter long oh well. the imagination took flight haha x**

**thanks to my readers and reviewers hope u enjoyed x**


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